Warning: more swears and also a possible trigger. It is the 80s so you have been warned.

Secrets

"Oh, wow. Look who showed up today," a redhead smiled as she teased her smaller friend.

"Oh, wow, Bev. You're so-o funny hahaha," Eddie bit back sarcastically. He sat down next to her at the lunch table, Ben on the other side of her. Stan, Bill and Richie were in line for their lunch.

"You know, you become more like Richie everyday." Eddie whipped around and stared at Beverly with wide, horrified eyes.

"Why would you say something like that?!," he squeaked. She only smiled wider. "I don't wanna be like him...," he mumbled hopelessly to himself. Just then, Eddie noticed Stan making his way to their table. Only him.

Stan was about to sit in front of Ben, like he always did at this lunch, but heard a "psst" as he set his tray down. He looked up to see Eddie's wide-eyed look. "What?," Stan asked confused.

Eddie cleared his throat and looked at the open seat in front of him dramatically, then back at Stan. Stan slid his tray in front of him and plopped down in the seat he was now assigned to. He stared expectantly at Eddie while he cleanly ripped his sandwich into pieces.

Eddie leaned over the table but only made it halfway. "I need to talk to you," he whispered with punctuated words.

"Oh... Kay?," Stan mumbled with a bit of food in his cheek. "We're talking?"

"Stanley," he said aggravated.

"Yes?"

"You know what I mean."

"Well, what do you wanna do about it?"

"D-d-do about wh-what?," Bill sat down tentatively next to Stan. Stan pulled his arm into his lap to make room for Bill. Bill interpreted it differently.

'He doesn't even want to touch me...,' the boy thought sulkily. He didn't even realize the silent, and somehow violently expressive exchange between his friends.

'DO NOT TELL HIM,' Eddie mouthed at Stan, making sure Bill wasn't looking at him when he did.

'Why would I?,' Stan mouthed back.

'What?' Stan rolled his eyes back into his skull.

"Thanks for taking my spot, Jewy," Richie nearly slammed his lunch tray on the table next to Bill, but had his trademark smirk. Stan glared half-assedly, not wanting to give Richie the attention he's always so desperate for.

Beverly had been observing the exchange between her four guy friends, occasionally looking back and smiling at Ben's clear confusion. She sensed that something was wrong with all of them except Stan. He was acting normal. Glaring at Richie was a sign that he was fine, happy even. Richie glaring daggers back was a completely different and rather disturbing sign. Eddie's eyes were wide and he didn't seem to blink for the whole lunch, anxiously wanting to talk to Stan about something life-altering. Bill didn't even look up at all, and he barely acknowledged the tray of food in front of him.

"What even are gerbils?," she said to the sulky boy in front of her. That got their attention.

The whole table looked at Beverly with confusion or disgust, or both.

"What-"

"What do you mean, Bev?," Stan talked over Richie, smoothly taking Beverly's attempt at directing to the conversation.

"Like, are they like gophers? Or are they like ferrets?"

"They're nothing like ferrets," Eddie finally snapped out of it.

"Well," Stan started with a high voice. "They kinda are. They're both a part of the rodent family."

"Why the fuck are we talking about-"

"What does a gerbil look like?," Bev continued over Richie.

"It's just a h-h-hamster with a long t-tail," Bill spoke up finally.

"Wait, really?," Ben asked, his amazement of the world making Beverly smile. He somehow still had his child wonder, even after a year of high school.

"Y-yep. Just a-about the s-ss-ss-size of them, too."

They chatted like this for a while, talking over Richie until he finally mentioned something about the rabbits that hop around his front yard every other night. Stan, of course, brought up his birds and talked about which ones eat which rodents they were talking about. "Thanks for that image, Stanley," Eddie had groaned and Stan just smiled and hummed a "you're welcome." The bell rang finally and Beverly took Stan's tray. He gave a questioning look and she winked back at him. When his expression didn't change she tipped her head to Eddie's direction. There ya go...

She congregated with Richie and Bill over to the trash cans. "I do love rabbits...," her attempt at more light-hearted conversation fell on distracted ears. Bill and Richie were both staring at Eddie and Stan as they left the cafeteria side-by-side. Bill looked to be gloomy again and Richie seemed to be fuming. She could see the smoke spewing out of the trashmouth' ears but he hid it surprisingly well. For him at least.

"Damn fags...," he all but growled out, but only loud enough for the two closest to him to hear. Bill made it at the trash just then and slammed his tray into the garbage. He dodged passed everyone and left Beverly and Richie staring after him in bewilderment. "The hell's wrong with him?" Beverly sighed and threw out Stan's tray with Richie's. She waited until they were out in the hallway to explain to Richie what happened.

"I get that your sense of humor is abrasive or dark, or whatever way you wanna describe it, but you can't just say something like that with that much malice to your own friends. Sometimes, a lot of the time, it's really not funny. It can border on bullying. That's probably what upset Bill." Beverly had a feeling it was more than that, but she knew better than to confide in Richie about her hunches.

Richie was still fuming, Beverly's words were doing nothing to diffuse him or make him stop thinking very derogatory terms, but he kept quiet. He knew Bev was smarter than him, it wasn't hard to see, and he would try to see things the way she did. She was very insightful, about the world and about people. He didn't want to hurt his friends, not ever. Even if he was extremely jealous of a certain Jew. But he could see was Eds liked him. He was a good guy. Better than him...

"Yeah...," Richie said at last. "I'm sorry," he said to her, just above a whisper. She smiled again kindly.

"It's not me you have to apologize to," she said softly. They both looked through the crowd and for a split second, saw the slick, raven hair before it disappeared again.

AN: Oof. So much angst. And don't ya just love Bev? :)

Tell me what y'all thought! I'm usually very quick to respond. And more chapters are in progress, don't worry.