Into every life, a little rain must fall. But you didn't actually think Tony would stand around getting wet, did you?
It had been four days since the landslide at the House on the Cliffs, though Tony could barely recognize one from another. In the daytime, he watched over Pepper, keeping his eyes trained on her face, and holding her hand. And at night, he tried to sleep as little as possible, for fear that she'd pass away without him knowing it. So the few times he had nodded off, he awoke with a start and scolded himself for being so careless.
Rhodey and Marilynn came and went in shifts. They attended to Tony as much as possible, bringing him food and urging him to take breaks. But he never went more than a few steps away, and he hardly touched whatever it was that they brought him.
He looked exhausted. His eyes were red-rimmed and blood-shot, with heavy bags under them. His cheeks were gaunt and his face was scruffy with long stubble. But, for the first time in his life, he hardly cared what he looked like. Nothing was more important than being there for Pepper every second that he could. All else mattered little.
When it was just him alone with her, in the quiet of the room, he'd murmur to her. That was all he had the strength to do, really. He'd hold her hand to his cheek and gazed at her forlornly. "My love," he'd say. "My angel. Come back to me. Come back. I need you here, baby." And he'd kiss her fingers sweetly, before murmuring softly to her again, begging her to hold on and keep fighting to stay alive.
It was morning again, now. Around 7 am. Irene would be the one attending to Pepper that day, the night nurse had told him. And this would also be the day that they'd do a CAT scan to see the full extent of the damage to Pepper's brain, now that the post-operative swelling had gone down considerably. This would give them a good indication of what Pepper's quality of life would be going forward, and Tony's already frayed nerves were absolutely on edge. Would she be in a coma for the rest of her life?, he wondered. Would she ever be the same woman again?
He sat by Pepper's bed, as he had been, watching over her, when Irene entered the room. "Good morning, Mr. Stark," she said pleasantly.
"You can call me, Tony, Irene. You know that," he gently reminded her, but not moving his gaze from Pepper's face.
She smiled sheepishly back. "I know, and I keep forgetting," she said, picking up Pepper's chart to read it. "I haven't been here in couple of days, so I'm not quite up to speed, but it looks like we are doing the first post-op brain scan today, correct?"
Tony nodded.
"Well," Irene said, checking the drainage bags and Pepper's IV. "Now that the swelling has gone down, we'll get a good look at what's happening in there, anyway."
Tony shifted his eyes to Irene as she examined Pepper's face around the many hoses and attachments connected to the ventilator. They'd periodically put ice packs over Pepper's eyes and cheeks to help with the bruising and swelling during the first couple of days. And it was helping, as Pepper's face was slowly going back to its natural shape. The bruises were now a very deep purple hue, with yellow patches out around the edges where they had begun to heal.
Irene lifted up Pepper's sleeve and strapped the blood pressure cuff around her upper arm. She pushed the button for it to start to compress, and Tony heard the soft, hiss and hum of the machine. It paused and began to beep, and Irene took the reading. "110 over 70," she said. "She's staying nice and consistent."
The doctor had warned against her blood pressure dropping too much, which could indicate an infection in her brain or in her lungs, as was common with head trauma patients, or patients on ventilators. Tony was grateful that nothing had changed in this regard. It was one less thing Pepper had to battle.
Irene finished her work, and turned to Tony. "I'll let the doctor know everything is doing fine, and he'll order the CAT scan," she explained.
"Thank you," Tony said. He turned around to look at her before she left. "Hey, have you talked to Happy lately?" he asked, trying to put on a smile. But his voice was weary.
Irene smiled and looked at him, a little surprised that that would even cross his mind, but thought it was sweet that he would think to ask. "Um, yes, actually," she said. "We've talked a lot since your wedding."
Tony smiled at her. "Good," he said. "You two look great together. And a little bird told me he's crazy about you."
Irene chuckled. "Oh, Mr. Stark. Tony, I mean," she said bashfully. He smiled at her warmly. "I, uh, I really like him, too," she said.
"Then I'll make sure I get him up here," he said. "You guys need to spend more time together."
"Well, it's been hard, you know. Since I took this job and moved out of LA," she explained.
"I can imagine," he replied. He turned back around, and grasped Pepper's hand in both of his. He kissed it sweetly. "But there's nothing like it, you know?" he mused. "Love, I mean. I've never felt so broken down, yet so built up in my entire life. I never knew what I was missing until I fell in love with her, Irene. She's everything I never was, but always wanted to be. And I didn't even know it! For so many years, I didn't even know it," he mused.
Tony went quiet, as Irene watched him. He gazed at Pepper, her hand pressed to his lips tenderly. "I can't lose her," he murmured. "I just can't."
"She's lucky to have you in her life, too," she replied. "And I'm sure she knows you're here, fighting with her. That makes all the difference."
"I hope so," he said. "You don't know how much I wish this was me instead of her. I'd gladly go through all of this just to keep her from having to feel any of it."
Irene walked back over to Pepper's bed and smiled at her. "She was such a beautiful bride," she said, gently smoothing a few strands of Pepper's hair with her fingers. "She was positively glowing that night. I told Happy she looked like something straight out of a bridal magazine."
Tony chuckled softly. "She was beautiful," he agreed. "Breath taking. Literally. She took my breath away," he replied fondly.
"You know it's hard to find a couple that you know is going to be together forever, like you two," she said. "People aren't willing to fight to stay together anymore, you know?"
"I do," Tony affirmed. He gazed at Pepper lovingly. "But she and I? We've been through a lot. Even before we were together, we..." his voice cracked and he paused. "She was always there for me, no matter what," he continued after a moment. "And I feel like, if I lose her now? All of that will have been for nothing. Does that make sense?" he said, looking at her sheepishly.
Irene smiled softly at his words, and nodded in response. "I'll go call the doctor, and let him know we're ready," she said softly.
XxXxXxXxXx
A couple of hours later, the order came from the attending physician, Dr. Evans, who had taken over Pepper's care from the surgeon, Dr. Preator, for the CAT scan. Marilynn had also arrived, and had tried to talk Tony into leaving to get some rest. But he refused. So, she settled for holding her son-in-law's hand as they backed away from Pepper's bed to let the nurses prep her to be moved. Three nurses all worked together to roll Pepper out of the room, with her IV pole, heart monitor, and ventilator all connected, and down to Radiology. Tony and Marilynn followed, as they were told they could observe through a window if they wished. Tony didn't let go of Marilynn's hand the entire elevator ride down.
Once they arrived, they both were brought into a small observation room just outside the room with the CT scanner. Pepper was then wheeled into the room containing the enormous machine, and Tony instantly recalled the last time Pepper was in a machine like this, as the one they'd used to do their first ultrasound in New York was quite similar in shape and size. This made Tony's heart ache, as he fondly recalled how happy they were that day, and how bright the future had seemed at that time for them and their unborn child.
They watched intently as Pepper was placed on the table, and the donut-shaped scanner that went up and around her body shifted to the end. The nurses worked to move all of the attached hoses and tubes that Pepper was connected to out of the way. Then the Radiologist programmed the machine and the nurses left the room to go into the radiologist's control room, so that the scan could be completed.
Tony and Marilynn watched silently as the machine made a couple of passes over Pepper's whole body, and then came back to pass over her head a few times. It whirred and beeped softly as each stage was completed, and soon, it went back to its starting position at the end of the table.
The nurses and Radiologist reappeared and worked to get Pepper back on her bed with all of her necessary equipment around her. They soon rolled Pepper out of the room, and Tony and Marilynn followed them back onto the elevator, and back to the ICU. Once again in Pepper's room, the nurses settled her back in, checked her vitals, and left Tony and Marilynn to themselves. Tony gazed at Pepper as Marilynn thanked the ladies for their work.
She turned to look at Tony. "They won't have those results for a while, darlin'," she said, stroking his hair. "You should take a break. Go get some breakfast, or go take a nap."
"Can't," Tony said, shaking his head numbly, his eyes fixed on Pepper. He retook the seat beside the bed. "She needs me here, and I'm not leaving."
"But she also needs you to take care of yourself, too, dear," Marilynn reasoned. "You're no good to her exhausted and underfed."
Tony shifted his eyes to her, and frowned. "And what if something happens, and I'm not here? I've already had to live with the guilt of not being there to say goodbye to my parents when they died. I can't let that happen, again."
"Honey, listen to me," she said, putting her hands on his shoulders. "The last thing we need to do is admit you to this place because you've collapsed from exhaustion. If that happens, you won't be able to be there at all for Ginny like you want to be. And besides, you could use the change in scenery, anyway. And I'll be right here, keeping watch. She won't be alone for a second, darlin'."
Tony frowned, but then took a deep breath. "Maybe you're right," he said.
"You know I'm right," she said. "You listen to Mama Potts, and everything will be just fine. I might not be your Mama by birth, but I'm your Mama by law. And since your own can't be here, you're mine to take care of, just like Ginny."
Tony chuckled and smiled, despite his heavy heart. Marilynn smiled back. "There's that winning smile that won my daughter's heart," she cooed.
"Thank you," Tony said gratefully. "For everything." He held his arms open and gave Marilynn a big bear hug. She patted him on the back lovingly.
"We'll get through this. All of us. You'll see," she assured.
They broke the embrace and Tony point his index finger at her. "Call me," he said. "For anything. I want to know everything that happens," he said.
"You have my word," Marilynn assured. "Now, go on. Git," she said, playfully shooing him away. They both chuckled and Tony leaned over for one last look at Pepper before he left. "See you soon, baby," he murmured, kissing her forehead gently, which was still under a heavy gauze bandage. He winked at Marilynn, and then left the room and walked to the elevators.
XxXxXxXxXx
Tony reached his car, and decided, rather than navigate San Francisco traffic in his current state, he'd tilt the seat back and try to get some shut eye right where he was. So he did. At least, he tried to. But his mind was racing. Well, this is familiar, he thought, recollecting many times when he'd been in his shop for days without sleep. And, finally, when he'd surface and try to get some rest, his mind would start to reel at a breakneck pace, and he'd lie awake, staring at the ceiling, helpless in its grasp.
Tony popped his eyes back open and sighed in frustration. "Damn it," he said, as he scrubbed his hands over his face. Over the last four days, he hadn't just been sitting in grief-stricken silence. He was brainstorming. He couldn't just sit and watch Pepper waste away in a hospital bed. He knew, he knew, there had to be something more proactive he could do. Pepper lying in a coma for the rest of her life, or helplessly going blind was not going to happen. Not if he had anything to say about it. But he was going to need help. And there was only one person in the world he would even ever consider helping him.
He clicked on his contacts and thumbed through them. "Dr. Banner, I presume," he muttered, hitting the call button and putting the phone to his ear.
He heard Bruce pick up. "Tony. Long time, no chat. Well, since New Year's, anyway," his friend said, in his calm, steady voice.
Tony smiled. "God, has it been that long?" he teased.
"Please. That's a record for least amount of time spent between social interactions for me," Bruce teased back. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I've got a...project I want you to be in on," Tony explained, choosing to first use ambiguous words, as he thought the grisly details might scare off his colleague if he threw too much at him too fast.
"A project?" Bruce said. "What kind of project?"
"It's...a personal one," Tony replied, trying to keep the front going. But it quickly failed, and he lost his resolve. "Um..." he said, as a lump formed and he cleared his throat. "It's...it's about Pepper," he said.
"Pepper? Oh no," Bruce said. "Judging by your voice, what you have to tell me isn't good, is it, Tony?" he observed.
"No, it's...it's not," Tony replied sadly. "Did you happen to catch what's been going on in San Francisco?"
"I have heard about that, yes," Bruce confirmed. "The torrential rain, and the landslides. All really awful stuff."
"Yeah, well,uh..." Tony began. "Pepper was in San Francisco at the time, and was in one of those really bad landslides. The one involving the House on the Cliffs, in fact. So..."
He heard Bruce gasp. "Oh no. Oh, God, Tony! I'm sorry! How is she? Is she hurt?"
"She pretty badly hurt, yeah," Tony said. " She's in the ICU, with all kinds of broken bones and bruised internal organs. She's got serious head trauma, and they've put her into a medically induced coma, but, worst case scenario, she may never wake up."
Bruce was silent. "Forgive me for being naive, here, Tony, but what exactly are you asking me to do?"
"Bruce, I can't just sit around and wait for Pepper to die, or watch her lie unconscious in a hospital bed for the rest of her life. This is my wife we're talking about. And we're scientists, damn it!There has to be something we can do to correct the damage that's been done to her," Tony said. "Or I'm gonna die trying," he resolved.
"Let me get this straight," Bruce said. "You want to correct nerve damage? Rebuild brain tissue? Tony, that's..."
"Not been done yet?" Tony answered.
Bruce sighed. "I was going to say impossible," he corrected.
"Nothing's impossible. Not from where I'm standing," Tony said. "We've proven that over and over again. Come on, Banner. Do I really have to give you the speech about the Wright Brother's again? Or the "bumble bees aren't supposed to be able to fly because their wings aren't big enough" bit? Isn't this kind of stuff our job? To break those impossibilities down and make them probabilities, instead?"
Bruce was silent for a moment.
"I'll take that as a yes," Tony quipped. "How soon can I get you to San Francisco?"
He heard Bruce exhale. "I'll be on the first flight out," he replied.