Hello, all! And look at this! A second update this week! I'm on a roll I tell you! :D (Amazing what a hefty dose of your favorite OTP and their renewed love will do for inspiration!)
Love the reviews and support! (I've got a long weekend ahead of me full of lots of family plans, so I may not get to update again until next week some time! But rest assured I will ASAP! The creative fires are ROARING once more! And it feels GOOOOOOOOOD!)
Happy Pepperony Reunion and Happy Reading! :D
It wasn't long before Tony returned carrying something gray colored, and loosely rectangular in shape in his hand. He re-entered the room as harried as he'd left it, and Pepper eyed him curiously, and, albeit, with some apprehension.
Once he reached her bedside, he gave her an ecstatic grin, and seated himself beside her in the bed. Pepper naturally eased over to allow him enough room to join her. "This, my lovely wife," he said jovially, handing her the device. "Is something I've wanted to show you since we got married," he told her.
Pepper's eyebrows shot up. "I've never seen this?" she asked.
Tony shook his head. "Nope. I made it to give to you as a surprise, but..." he began. He shrugged. "With everything that happened..." he said, leaving the rest for obvious conclusion.
Pepper nodded in understanding and turned the object over and over in her hands. "I'd say 'thank you', but..." She chuckled. "I...might need a little help in figuring out just what the heck it is, first?" she joked.
Tony chuckled back, and gently grasped it, facing it right side up, and placing it back in her hands. "Just hit that button right there, and you'll figure it out," he told her, pointing to the power button.
"Okay?" Pepper said, doing as she was instructed. Instantly, a holographic picture of her walking down the aisle on the night of their rooftop wedding, among all of their friends and loved ones, came to life. She gasped. Tony watched her intently, his eyes sparkling in delight.
"Is...that me?" she asked, and then recanted. "Oh, of course it is. Don't be silly," she scolded herself. Tony gave an amused chuckle. "I look..."
"Breath-taking," Tony murmured, finishing her thought, with an adoring smile. "You were the most beautiful sight I'd ever laid eyes on."
Pepper's eyes flicked over to his, and he gazed at her, his expression tinged with both joyful reminiscence and wistful regret that she couldn't share the memory with him. Not in the way that he could, anyway.
She gave him a regretful smile, and turned her eyes back to the image. Then she frowned as she looked for the button to advance the image to the next one. She soon found it, and then pushed it. Next came the moment just before she joined him at the alter, when her mother was giving her away. Pepper smiled.
"Mama," she said lovingly. "Oh, she looks so happy."
Tony turned to his side, and laid his arm along the top of the elevated mattress, behind Pepper's head. "Well, believe it or not, she was," he joked. She giggled.
She clicked the button again, and this time, they were standing together, they're hands held in one another's, and smiling blissfully at each other. Her eyes moved over the image, and when they came to rest on Thor, she frowned. "Who is that officiating?" she asked, pointing to him. "He looks quite regal for your run-of-the-mill priest, don't you think?"
Tony winced, inhaling sharply through his teeth, realizing the massive, Avenger-sized gap in her memory that would understandably make this confusing for her. "Uh...yeah. That's because he isn't your run-of-the-mill priest, Pep. He's..." he said, pausing to try to come up with what would be a suitable explanation. But finding none, he relented. "Thor," he said finally, grimacing in defeat.
Pepper's eyes narrowed. "Thor," she parroted. "I...don't remember you ever knowing a 'Thor'."
"That's because he's a God. Well, not...a god. He's the Norse God of Lightning, and...all...of that," Tony stammered awkwardly.
Pepper just looked at him blankly.
"The Asgaardian prince? Carries a hammer? He's Odin's kid?" he attempted weakly. "No? Not familiar with Norse..."
"Tony, I know who the Mythological Thor is," Pepper clarified.
Tony exhaled. "Phew. Okay. For a minute, I thought maybe you'd need a crash course in ancient literature," he babbled. "And he's not mythological, for that matter. He's real. So very real."
"Are you trying to tell me this is supposed to be...the...Thor?" she asked, pointing to him in the photo. "And that he's the one who performed our wedding?!"
Tony winced again at her inherent doubt. "Yeah, I get it, Pep. This...might be a bit hard for you to comprehend, right now," he answered.
"If I didn't know better, I'd say it's a joke," she countered bitterly, her mood turning on a dime as she thrust the holographic imager back at him.
Tony frowned, and took it back from her in defeat. "Well, it's not a joke. It's for real. This really happened," he defended.
"I realize we had a wedding, Tony," Pepper explained. "I'm not disputing the validity of the pictures! But it looks like it was some kind of ridiculous...costume party or something. And for whatever reason on this green Earth, I agreed to allow this guy to marry us, who's dressed like he just got done sitting on a throne in some viking village somewhere, calling for his mead wench while someone was reading him Beowulf," she spat out.
"That's...actually not far off," Tony mused. "But for the record, for being royalty, he was very gracious in performing the ceremony. I gotta give him that."
Pepper huffed. "Okay, now I just think you're making fun of me. And the point is, this isn't at all what I pictured our wedding to be!" she cried.
"Making fun of you? Are you kidding?! Why would I? And why can't you just give it a chance?!" Tony shot back. He stood up off the bed, and swiveled around to face her again. "Come on, Pepper! I'm doing the best I can, here! At least, let me walk you through what actually happened. And maybe then, you'll see that..."
"No," Pepper said emphatically, shaking her head, and waving a hand at him in dismissal. "I can't do anymore for tonight, Tony. And at this point, I don't know what to think."
Tony frowned, and then his eyebrow raised as a though occurred to him "Wait!" he exclaimed. "Let me get Bruce! He was there. He'll vouch for me! He'll tell you it was all on the up and up. He knows Thor!"
Pepper cocked a skeptical eyebrow at him, and let out an exasperated sigh as he yanked his phone out of his pocket and quickly dialed his friend. He began to nervously figet as the phone rang. "Come on, Banner. Pick up. Pick up," he muttered impatiently. But it was to no avail. Bruce's voicemail came on, and Tony huffed, jabbing the call ending button.
"Damn it!" he barked.
"Tony, please!" Pepper begged. Her chin began to quiver and tears filled her eyes, and she looked downward at her hands in her lap for a moment before raising her eyes to look at him again. "Really. Who are we kidding? It's no use. I don't remember. And even if I did, I'm not sure I'd want to at this point."
Tony recoiled in defense from her jagged words. "You don't mean that," he said.
Pepper sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes. "You're right. I don't. I'm sorry," she replied. She exhaled sharply in frustration. "But it's clear, isn't it? Our lives were so different before the accident. It's obvious I was a very different person. And that's why it's so hard to imagine us..."
"Don't," Tony urged, his voice hoarse as he felt like she'd knocked the air out of his lungs. "Please, Pepper. We'll get through this. Don't give up so soon. You'll see. It will all make sense, and you'll see why we're together. And why I love you so much," he pleaded.
A sob left Pepper's chest, and she brought the back of a hand to her mouth. She nodded. "I love you, too, Tony. Truth is I always have," she confessed, smiling at him bashfully, despite the gravitas of the moment. "But I..." She stopped, hesitating before saying her next words. "I don't know if it's going to be enough," she said softly.
They gazed at each other in their raw, mutual despair for what felt like an eternity. Tony worked his jaw in thought, and then gave her a weak smile. "I'm not giving up on you, Potts," he resolved. "You're my wife. I refuse."
Pepper nodded somberly. "I thought you might say that," she told him. "But at the same time? I think I need...a little space."
"Space?" Tony asked, stunned. "Like...apart?"
Pepper chewed her lip, and then gave him a weak nod. "Everything's happened so quickly," she murmured. "I feel like my head is spinning. We're going too fast. And I just can't..."
"It's okay, you don't have to...I mean...I...guess I get it," Tony replied, his voice hollow and despondent. "Space," he reiterated. "You need time apart."
"Not permanently, Tony. Please don't think that I'm pushing you away," she urged.
"Well, you are, but..." he interjected, with a wry smile. He exhaled heavily, and then looked down at the imager. "Sh-should I just...chuck this thing, then? I mean...are you gonna want to even..." he stammered.
"No! Please don't take it away. Honestly. Give it to me," Pepper commanded, reaching her arms out for him to hand it to her. He numbly obliged, and she took it from him, pulling the device to her chest. "I just...need to slow down. Okay? I need to figure some things out on my own."
Tony swallowed hard. "Without me here to interfere," he concluded sadly.
She could see the pain in his eyes, and she regretted hurting him like she had. But she was sure she was doing the right thing. As much as it hurt, she needed to hit pause for a while, and have some time alone to collect her thoughts. So slowly, she gave him an affirmative nod.
Tony exhaled slowly in surrender. "Okay, then," he said. "I'll...uh...I'll just wait to hear from you. Huh, Pep?" he asked, trying to sound optimistic.
Pepper gave him a weak smile, and nodded. "Yes. Of course. Soon," she assured him.
Tony nodded in understanding, and turned to leave, but stopped in his tracks. Pepper watched as he turned back around to face her. Slowly, he walked back over to her, and bent down, looking intently into her eyes. "I love you," he murmured. "Just don't forget that, okay?" And with that, he placed a loving, lingering kiss on her lips. Pepper closed her eyes, reveling in the feeling of the sparks defiantly shooting up and down her spine in response, making the moment feel even more anguished.
He pulled away, and Pepper opened her eyes to look at him. "I won't," she promised.
He smiled weakly, and nodded. "Bye," he said softly, before turning to leave.
Pepper gestured a slight wave back, and then she closed her eyes as she heard the door shut behind him, leaving the silence to suddenly fill her ears in the empty room. But soon that silence was joined by the sounds of her beginning to softly weep. I barely know who I am, anymore!, she reasoned, wiping at the hot tears streaking down her cheeks. Let alone who I USED to be!
XxXxXxXxXx
The sun had begun to set over the water, as Tony sat on the hood of his R8, and gazed out at the ocean. He'd driven out to the old Stark Mansion site. Or, at least, where it used to be- at 10880 Malibu Point- and parked his car over the top of the medallion embedded in what used to be the floor of his foyer. It seemed like the appropriate spot in which to end up that night, given he and Pepper were currently suspended in limbo between the past and the present. And call it what you will, but he was feeling nostalgic. Something he recalled once telling Pepper he certainly wasn't. Joke's on me, he thought.
He worked his jaw in thought, reminiscing about the old days, when things seemed less complicated on the outside, yet so unrequited on the inside. He couldn't help but smile at the thought of how just seeing her arrive every morning gave him, at the time, inexplicable butterflies in his stomach. He even chuckled at how ridiculous it was that he, Tony Stark, billionaire playboy extraordinaire could be so ga-ga over a woman, even back then. But I was, he remembered fondly. I know that now. It's almost like my heart already KNEW that I was, LONG before my head ever even realized it.
He happily recalled many a sunny southern California morning where the tv was on in the shop, tuned to the news rattling off the day's headlines, and he was up early, his mind firing away new calculations for whatever new project he was working on. JARVIS would be chattering his recent calibrations to him as he input the calculations into the system. Then he'd hear it. The sound of her car engine as she rolled into the driveway. The ignition being cut, and the short pause before Jarvis would announce, "Ms. Potts has arrived for the day, Sir."
And he'd smile to himself- automatically, every time.
He'd then hear the front door open, and the soft click-clack of her heels as she walked across the living room floor to drop her briefcase, purse, and computer down on the coffee table before he'd hear her start to make her way down the stairs to the shop. He'd glance quickly toward the steps just in time to see her appear, and then turn back to what he was doing, feigning deep concentration on the task at hand so as not to be suspected of gawking.
Then, he thought, I'd listen for it.
"Good morning, Mr. Stark," he'd hear her sweet voice say.
"It is, Ms. Potts," he'd say nonchalantly- again, feigning concentration on what was in front of him. Then, he'd slowly turn to face her, and admire once again how polished and poised she always seemed to be. But he'd only greet her with a polite smile, saying something like- "What's on the docket for today?"
She'd give him her answer, rattling off to him whatever random administrative tasks were to fill her day. He'd nod and smile, only half listening, enough to interject a response once in a while, or to honest-to-goodness make any changes in her plan or ask a pertinent question if one should so happen to pop up. But mostly, he just reveled in having her there. The scent of her perfume. The sound of her voice. Her baby blue eyes smiling pleasantly back at him. In short, this daily routine is what made every day even remotely bearable back then.
Tony took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly, feeling the reminiscent euphoria of those happy memories dissipate and be replaced by the melancholy of his current heartache. But then something popped into his mind that Cho had said- to expect that Pepper would be subject to random, emotional outbursts during her recovery from her brain injury, and that it was important for them both to be patient and let her mind work to regain her memory on its own. This helped to ease him somewhat, but mostly the need to be near her is what was searing his soul at the moment.
Still, he knew there was nothing left but to do what Cho instructed and be patient. He had to believe that Pepper would come around, and let him back into her presence again. (She said she would, after all.) But, if he was being honest, that didn't really help the hurt or the anxiety of having to wait her out.
A glum smile crept over his lips. "Glad I left the pictures," he murmured, keeping the faith that some way, some how, she'd find the courage to look through them during this time, and realize that their wedding was every bit as magical as he remembered. And more importantly, realize just how much she really meant to him- then and now.