"Stop it! Oh my god that's fucking disgusting!"

From the other side of the electric fireplace, Judy cackles as she crams a triple-burnt-to-charcoal-marshmallows-s'more into her mouth.

"Judy! Oh my god noooooooo…"

Burnt marrow oozes to the floor. Judy wipes her mouth, swallows, and throws her arms up in victory.

"I AM THE S'MORE CHAMPION!"

Jen just looks at Judy and chuckles in disbelief.

"What?" Judy's making that adorable little clueless face again, with a slowly encroaching grin and mischievous eyes.

Jen smiles, looks off to the distance, shrugs, looks back at Judy again. "I'm just— I'm glad you're here, you know."

Judy makes heart eyes and runs around the fireplace to plop herself down on the bench next to Jen.

"You know you can't get rid of me now, right?"

Jen rolls her eyes and gives Judy a playful shove. Judy makes a fake shocked face and shoves Jen back. Then Jen's burying her fingers in Judy's ribs with a "you know what, you little asshole elf with your gross burnt marshmallows with little white fluff still stuck all over your nose," throwing Judy into a fit of giggles. Judy tries to tickle Jen back, but Jen's too fast and Judy doubles over with laughter. In seeing Judy's face explode with joy, Jen's face turns serious and all of a sudden, she doesn't know what what her hands are doing, she's lost complete control of her body and she's grabbing Judy by the waist and pulling her towards her and catching her with her lips and running her fingers through her hair and she can't stop and she kisses her friend mercilessly, breathlessly, desperately, until she just can't breathe any longer.

Jen pulls away and presses her forehead against Judy's, terrified of what she'll see in Judy's face if she backs away far enough to see it. A few seconds pass, maybe a minute. Jen inhales sharply, as if in pain, and draws away. "Shit," she says, exhaling unevenly. Then she's shaking, unable to meet Judy in the eye, all of her body closing in on itself. "I'm so, so sorry."

Judy's left hand finds the small of Jen's back and her other hand pulls Jen back to her. Jen's eyes flicker back up hesitantly. Judy's eyes say safety.

"Why are you sorry?"

Their lips clash again and neither can keep her hands off the other. Still kissing, Judy guides Jen off the porch bench and into the guest house, where Jen gently pushes Judy against the door and feels her way up and down her body. When Jen's hands find the hem of Judy's shirt, she backs away for a moment and gives Judy a loving look.

"Is this okay?"

"Only if this is." Judy's got the bottom of Jen's shirt gathered in fistfuls.

Jen bites her lip, then nods slowly and removes the shirt from Judy's body. Shocked into lesbian panic mode by Judy's sculpted abs, Jen barely notices as Judy slowly drops Jen's shirt to the floor and lowers her onto the bed. Jen sighs happily as Judy makes her way down her collarbone, decorating her with kisses. When she gets down to Jen's bra, Jen tenses a bit and Judy feels the sharp intake of air.

"Is it okay to take this off or you wanna just make out a bit?"

"Oh my god, Judy, please just stop second guessing yourself and let's, ya know, get this operation going already."

"Ah, you're right, sorry, I'll keep going."

When Judy unclasps the bra with a determined face and drops it to the floor, Jen inhales sharply again and looks off somewhere distant. Judy immediately stops and lays down on Jen's side, tracing shapes into Jen's stomach with her finger. Jen pulls the blanket from the foot of the bed and buries herself beneath it, and faces toward the other direction.

"Uh… Jen? You okay?"

Jen inhales, and turns back to Judy with tears in her eyes threatening to fall. "I'm sorry."

Judy's hand flies to catch Jen's tears with her thumb. "Oh honey, don't be sorry, you're okay."

Jen sob-chuckles and reaches up to touch Judy's face. "You're so perfect."

Judy rolls her eyes. "I don't know about that."

"I do."

The two stare at each other for a long time, and they hold hands while Jen cries softly. After a while, Judy asks if Jen wants to talk about it. Jen bites her lip and ponders this.

"I just— I don't… I don't want to disgust you like I did Ted," Jen says quickly, the words falling over themselves. She looks up at Judy.

Judy thinks for a minute, then says, "girl, you know you're a whole snack and a half, right?"

Jen shakes her head vigorously. "No, Judy, please don't joke about this."

"I'm not joking, Jen. You're a smoke show."

Jen rolls her eyes.

"No, listen to me. You're the opposite of disgusting.

"And if you'll let me, I'd very much like to touch you there.

"But only if you want. We can go slow, if you want."

Jen wipes her face and then nods and whispers, "okay.

"Yes.

"I trust you."

Ever so gently, Judy pulls away the blanket, brings her fingertips up to Jen's chest and brushes over her scars on both sides. Jen watches her carefully, holding her breath. Judy shifts down and tenderly kisses each inch along the lines of the scars, then backs up and smiles at Jen.

"Beautiful," she whispers.

And Jen starts breathing again with relief. She begins to sob. Judy pulls her in close, closer than Jen's been to anyone in 2 years, and kisses her hair.

"Thank you," Jen whispers.

"Anytime, hot stuff," Judy responds, and smiles into Jen's hair.