CHAPTER SIX - Consent

When Amanda came to visit with the Rowdy 3 (5), somehow the night always ended up in a state of general inebriation, in Todd's flat.

Dirk and Farah were both lightweights and were drunk in about 5 minutes. Todd and Amanda took quite a lot longer, and as for the Rowdies, it was frankly hard to tell the difference.

Somehow the conversation turned to Amanda's whirlwind romance with one of the Blackwing subjects they had recently found on the road.

"I'm really glad he had his own house though, the van doesn't exactly have much privacy if you know what I mean."

"Amanda!" Dirk said in a shocked voice.

"Oh come on Dirk, you know what I'm- wait, maybe you don't- have you ever even HAD sex?" Amanda asked and then turned mock-serious. "No actually, have you?"

"Amanda tha's so not cool-" Todd objected, although if he were honest, he was also interested.

"No I wanna know I wanna know."

All eyes turned to Dirk, who was sat on the floor next to Farah

"Do you mean, consensual sex?" Dirk asked, ingenuously. Amanda, Todd and Farah felt themselves sobering almost instantly as they all stared at him. He was still looking at Amanda, who looked suddenly crestfallen.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you that, it's none of my business." She said, confused.

Farah fumbled inelegantly into a kneeling position next to him

"If anyone ever tries to hurt you again, I will kill them." she said, with the absolute confidence that comes with drinking.

"Thank you Farah" Dirk said "I appreciate that."

"No one's allowed to do anything to you without your consent." Amanda said quietly, feeling very guilty for ruining the mood and potentially upsetting Dirk, even though he seemed unfazed. "If anyone tries you can call us up and we'll be right there."

Dirk laughed lightly. "You mean I should call up a group who habitually take all my energy without my consent?"

"We don't take ALL your energy" Vogel protested but was hushed with a sign by Martin. There was a moment of tense silence.

"You don't like it, we'll stop." Martin said simply. Amanda looked gratefully at him.

"Of course I don't like it, it's terrifying and exhausting and I feel like a zombie afterwards." Dirk said indignantly.

"But you taste so good." Gripps objected.

"Thanks... I think...but I'd still rather you didn't."

"It's done." Martin said, although the others looked a little disappointed.

Dirk gave Martin a brief nod of acknowledgement and he saw the intelligent sympathy that Martin usually reserved for Drummer Girl.

"I think it's time we cleared out boys." Martin declared, nevermind that two of them were girls.

Todd saw them out and caught up with his sister to say goodbye for another month or two.

"I'm sorry about that." she said to him. "I really fucked that up."

"Not your fault, don't worry about it. And ... I think it was kind of a good thing, for Dirk to finally admit that he doesn't like having his energy eaten."

Amanda nodded, still looking worried, but they hugged and bid each other farewell.

When Todd got back to the apartment, Farah had fallen asleep on the sofa. He put a blanket over her, and then found Dirk asleep against the wall. That didn't look comfortable, so he nudged him awake.

"Come on Dirk."

He hauled him up and guided him to his bed. He took his shoes off and paused. For any other friend he would take their jacket off too, but after what Dirk had just implied, he felt it would be better to just put a blanket over him and leave it there.

He took the duvet as compensation for losing the bed and sat on an armchair, soon drifting off.

Todd was first up, and although he tried not to disturb the others, the noise and smell of coffee woke Farah.

"I hate the world and everything in it." She muttered darkly as she slowly got off the sofa and put a hand on her head. Todd chuckled slightly, making another cup of coffee. He wondered if Dirk was faring any better with his hangover.

She walked over to the kitchen and gratefully accepted the coffee, and some painkillers. After a moment she said, hesitantly, in a low tone: "Todd... is Dirk ok?"

Todd thought carefully before he spoke. "I think he just...really needs us right now."

Farah nodded, putting a supportive hand on his for a moment before heading to the shower.

Todd sighed, and finished his coffee. He knew that Dirk probably needed more support than they could realistically provide: the kind of trauma he was trying to process was so far beyond Todd's experience it was ridiculous. But he couldn't go to a professional, they wouldn't believe him. They would almost certainly diagnose him with some condition that he didn't have, perhaps try to medicate him or lock him up somewhere.

They just had to do the best they could.

He went to check on Dirk and found him sitting in bed quietly, which was never a good sign. Whenever Dirk started thinking about his life, it depressed him.

Todd sat on the end of the bed. "You ok?"

"I think I... ruined the party last night, didn't I?"

Todd shook his head. "No, you didn't. It's funny though, Amanda thought she ruined it too. She didn't mean to bring up any bad memories for you."

"I know she didn't."

"Can I ask about what you said? Was it... was it Blackwing? Some kind of experiment?"

Dirk looked down. "It was at Blackwing, but it wasn't an experiment as such. The guard who manned the surveillance cameras at night, he sometimes left his post to visit me and then he would..." Dirk shrugged, leaving the rest unspoken. "Priest... he knew it was going on, but he didn't try to stop it. Eventually Riggins found out though and I never saw that guard again after that."

Todd held a hand out, and Dirk took it.

"I'm with Farah. Anyone who ever hurt you, and anyone who ever tries to hurt you, I will make them dead."

"That's very kind Todd but I'd really rather you just focus on not ending up dead yourself."

"I'll make you a cup of tea."

"You don't have to look after me you know Todd. That goes above and beyond your duties as my assistant."

"We're off duty Dirk. Right now I'm just your friend."

He disappeared to the kitchen.