Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any properties in this work that I did not make myself.
Harold of Konoha
Chapter ten: The chunnin exams (AKA Harold and his friends are spanners in the work)
A large crowd gathered in an open field somewhere in the village of Konohagakure, to celebrate the launching of Konoha's first airship. Standing on a stage in front of the crowd was Naruto Uzumaki, the sixth and current Hokage, along with two men from the company who created the airship, and are currently in the process of making more. "Thank you all for coming," Naruto announced to the crowd, who started to cheer loudly. After gesturing for the crowd to lower the volume, Naruto announced, "Today, we of the village of Konohagakure celebrate the christening of The Hanamaru!" (1)
As the crowd started cheering even louder, Naruto saw a reporter trying to ask a question, so the Lord Sixth gestured for the crowd to calm down again. "You there," Naruto said as he pointed to the reporter trying to ask a question, "You have a question, I take it?" Naruto was trying to give this reporter a fair chance, but immediately regretted it when he saw that the reporter trying to get his attention was not an actual reporter, but rather Harold Fisher, Konoha's oldest active jonin (oldest active shinobi overall), doing something stupid as he usually does.
"Harold Fisher, BS Press," Harold replied as if he were an actual reporter from a news outlet, "I think that The HindenHarold (2) would have been a MUCH more awesome name for the ship."
"Mr. Fisher, this is no place for you to start spewing random bits of your trademarked stupidity," Naruto replied in an exasperated tone. Seeing what he hoped was an actual reporter trying to ask a question, Naruto pointed to him and said, "Yes, what's your question?" The Lord Sixth would immediately regret giving that particular 'reporter' the chance, as he realized too late that it was not an actual reporter but rather Inoichi Yamanaka, a close friend of Harold's and one of the oldest active shinobi Konoha had, roughly the same age as Harold himself.
"Inoichi Yamanaka, BS Press," the Yamanaka patriarch replied, "I'm afraid that I'm going to have to agree with my fellow press-member here; The HindenHarold sounds like a totally awesome name for a ship."
"Well it's called The Hanamaru, and we're not changing the name," Naruto replied, his patience starting to wear thin.
"Where did you even come up with a name like Hanamaru?" Inoichi asked.
"When my family and I visited the shipyard where the airship was built," Naruto said, "The head shipwright took a friendly interest in the hand-held game my daughter Natsu played during the early lunch we all took. When he asked what the name of one of the little critters Natsu had was, she explained that it was called Bloominoko, but that she nicknamed the one she had Hanamaru. The head shipwright thought that Hanamaru was such a nice name that he ended up giving it to the airship."
A third hand went up somewhere in the crowd, so Naruto pointed to it and gestured for them to speak, hoping that it was a real reporter this time. No such luck, as it was actually Tsume Inuzuka, a friend of Harold's and Inoichi's; standing next to the older Inuzuka woman was her ninja dog Kuromaru, who was shaking his head in shame.
"Tsume Inuzuka, BS Press," Tsume replied when Naruto gestured for her to speak, "Let me get this straight. You named Konoha's first airship after a character on one of your daughter's video games?"
"I didn't name the ship, the head shipwright did," Naruto clarified, "I had no say in the matter, as I am not a member of the ship-building company."
"I think that the airship really should have been named The HindenHarold," Tsume remarked, "That sounds like one hell of a frigg'en cool ship name!"
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Naruto muttered too quietly for any other person to hear, "And Sakura thinks the stuff I did when I was twelve was stupid."
A few days later, Haru Uchiha, along with Shikaru Nara, Bankai Inuzuka, Shibei Aburame, Choba Akimichi and Natsu Uzumaki, were all waiting in a classroom over at Konoha's local ninja academy. They were waiting for an academy instructor to show up to give them the rundown for the chunnin exams, which all six genin present were about to take. "Wow, there's quite a small number of participants, huh?" Shikaru remarked casually.
"Well this IS the chunnin exams," Shibei replied, "A chance to go up in rank. It's not to be taken lightly." A few seconds later, the door opened, and two men stepped into the classroom. The first of these men was Iruka Umino, the academy instructor that Haru and the others were waiting for; aside from looking older, he didn't change a bit. Iruka had a look of being better off in terms of finances than what an academy instructor, who are notoriously underpaid, normally should be. This is because Natsu Uzumaki, who was given private training and tutoring (explaining why she was never seen attending the Hidden Leaf Ninja Academy) had Iruka as a tutor, but for the basic skills any normal academy student would learn. Having Iruka be Natsu's tutor was the only thing Naruto had a say in in regards to Natsu's training and education; everything else was controlled by Hinata's iron fist.
"Hey, Iruka-sensei," Haru and the others greeted.
"Hello to you all as well," Iruka replied kindly to his old students (the boys attended the academy as normal).
After the primary greetings were out of the way, Natsu asked Iruka, "I heard that you had to take your cat to the vet. Is he okay?"
"Salem is doing very fine, thank you for asking," (3) Iruka replied, "I'm guessing your father mentioned it after the last time I spoke with him?"
"Mmm hmm," the Uzumaki girl replied, nodding in the affirmative.
"Yeah, nothing seriously wrong happened to him," Iruka added, "He just needed to be fixed."
"Hey, not to be rude or anything," Bankai interrupted, "But who's this joker you brought with you, Iruka-sensei?"
His expressing becoming slightly stern, Iruka replied, "Calling him a joker is being rude, Bankai."
"What?" Bankai said in a defensive tone, "My grandma always tells me that before I learn a stranger's real name, it's perfectly acceptable to call that stranger a joker."
"Well that would certainly explain a lot," Iruka remarked in a knowing tone, knowing full well the kind of woman that Bankai had for a grandmother.
Stepping forward, the mystery man introduced himself. He had brownish hair, wore blue-framed glasses, a white lab coat, and shinobi sandals. "Hello, children," the man greeted, "My name is Katasuke. I work in the development division of Konoha's labs."
"Oh, you're one of those 'boys from development' that my dad keeps bringing up," Haru said.
"Yes, that's one way to put it," Katasuke replied with a nod. To all of the genin present, Katasuke said, "Before you all begin the chunnin exams, there's something I'd like for all of you young genin to have."
"For the last time, no," Iruka said suddenly in a firm tone, the suddenness getting everyone's attention. "Naruto has expressly forbidden its use in the chunnin exams, as he said it defeats the purpose of the exams," Iruka said to the scientist, "Besides, I doubt that Haru and Natsu in particular wouldn't even go near those, given the bad experience they had the first time they saw one."
"Wait, what are we talking about?" Haru asked, suddenly interested in the conversation the instant he heard his name was mentioned.
"I am talking about this," Katasuke replied, pulling his right sleeve back to reveal that he wore a Kote, "This device will change the way the shinobi world-"
"Holy crap! It's another one of those vicious blood-thirsty murder machines!" Haru exclaimed, clearly freaked out. Looking around the room, Haru saw, ran to, and jumped through one of the windows, in order to get as far away from the Kote on Katasuke's right forearm as possible. The fact that the window Haru chose to jump through was closed did not hinder the young Uchiha at all. During the entirety of Haru's freak-out, Natsu started crying uncontrollably out of fear.
Shikaru, Bankai, Choba and Shibei all went wide-eyed at the respective freak-outs Haru and Natsu had, though the shades Shibei wore made it difficult to tell. "If seeing that thing made Haru and his dorky girlfriend freak the frig out," Bankai said as he pointed to the Kote on Katasuke's right arm, "Then I don't want any frigg'en part in it! Count me the frig out, man!"
As the other boys started to decline Katasuke's offer in their own unique ways, Iruka ran over to the window Haru jumped through. Looking out the window and seeing Haru sitting himself up on the ground, Iruka called out, "Haru! Are you okay?!"
"Yeah, I'll be fine," Haru replied in a mildly disoriented tone, "It's a good thing I jumped through a window on the academy's first floor, huh?"
Later that evening, Harold and his friends all went to a local bar, where all of the older adults, along with their adult children, would be gathering to discuss the first portion of the chunnin exams that Konoha was holding for its genin (the villages are all doing their own chunnin exams for their own genin). Apparently, due to time constraints that Konoha and its allies, Suna and Iwa, are facing due to the ongoing fifth shinobi war, instead of first doing a paper exam portion, then a travel-through-the-forest-of-death portion, then an elimination-style combat tournament portion, Konoha's chunnin exam is only doing the elimination-style combat tournament portion this time around.
Entering the bar, Harold and company saw Shikaku Nara and Choza Akimichi sitting over at the counter, and went to join them. "Word up with thee, boys?" Inoichi greeted to his fellow Ino-Shika-Cho trio members.
"We're just waiting for the results for the first round of the chunnin exams," the older Nara man replied as he grabbed a small pretzel from the small dish between him and Choza.
Looking around the bar, Tsume said, "Wow, I figured that Shibi would show up, but Hiashi as well? I thought that places like this were 'too low brow' for Mr. Stuck-Up." Looking over a bit, Harold saw Hiashi and Shibi sharing a booth, having a gentlemanly talk with each other about what they hoped would result from the first round of the chunnin exams.
Looking back to the older Inuzuka woman, Harold said, "Well, Hiashi's granddaughter is taking part, so can you blame the man for showing up?"
After Choza ordered another mug of lager, Naruto entered the bar with Sasuke and Shikamaru. "Alright, everyone," Shikamaru called out, getting everyone to look at him and the others, "Now I know that all of you are quite eager to hear how the first round of the chunnin exams went. Given that all of you are either the parent, grandparent, or otherwise an adult relative to one of the genin participating, this is to be expected."
"So who won their fights?" Harold called out.
"Well the first fight ended up being between Shikaru and Choba," Sasuke explained, "The match ended in a double-surrender." As news of both the younger Nara AND the younger Akimichi surrendering to each other spread through the bar like a wildfire, it was met with whispering, some of which sounded annoyed with the result of the Shikaru-Choba fight.
"Why did they both surrender?" Shikaku asked, looking mildly annoyed.
"Shikaru and Choba were thoroughly exhausted by the time they both surrendered," Shikamaru explained, "They both said that due to how much they respected each other, they decided to give the mach their all. They both looked surprised when they both surrendered, though. I'm guesing that Shikaru wasn't counting on Choba surrendering, and Choba wasn't counting on Shikaru surrendering."
"Well ain't that just peachy," Shikaku said in an annoyed tone, turning to face his fellow Ino-Shika-Cho trio members. Shikaku was surprised to see both Inoichi and Choza struggling to keep themselves from crying.
"Oh, the manly beauty of true friendship burns brightly in those boys!" Choza declared, "They'll both grow up to be true men among men for sure!"
"I haven't seen friendship that strong since Shikamaru and Choji!" Inoichi added as tears started trickling down his face, "Friendship truly is magic!"
"Of course the other two had to be big softies about it," Shikaku muttered to himself, too quietly for anyone else to hear.
Managing to take her gaze away from the Inoichi/Choza sob fest, Tsume faced Naruto and the others and asked, "What about round two?"
"That was between Haru and Shibei," Naruto answered, "Haru ended up winning, mostly because most of Shibei's bugs were killed when they swarmed out to shield him from a fireball jitsu that Haru used."
"Aww hells yeah, my grandnephew won his first match!" Harold exclaimed triumphantly, pumping a fist into the air, "That's an extra 20,000 ryo in my pocket!"
"Hold on a minute," Sasuke interrupted in a mildly disgusted tone, "You bet money on the outcome of my son's match in the first round of the chunnin exams?!"
"Hey, ALL of us had money on at least one of the participants," Tsume explained, "That being said, I'm assuming that Bankai fought Lord Sixth's daughter, given Shikaru and Choba surrendered to each other, and Harold's grandnephew beat Shibi's grandson like a red-haired step-child who owed him money."
"…Uhh, yeah," Naruto replied slowly, unable to think of a proper reaction to Tsume's metaphor about Haru beating Shibei.
"I'm also assuming that Bankai kicked your daughter's ass, Lord Sixth," Tsume continued, "Sorry about that, but that's Inuzuka clan skill for you."
"Actually, Natsu defeated Bankai," Sasuke interrupted, drawing a surprised look from the older Inuzuka woman.
"Are you frigg'en kidding me?" Tsume snapped, "Bankai lost?! He should have beaten Lord Sixth's kid no problem!"
"I had 12,000 ryo on Bankai to win!" Shikaku exclaimed.
"Oh the two of you are both terrible!" Hiashi snapped angrily from over where he sat with Shibi, "I had every confidence in Natsu that she would win!"
"So round two, which will take place in a few days at the big stadium, will be between Haru and Natsu," Sasuke explained. Giving some of the older adult a knowing look, Sasuke added, "I'm going to guess that you all will be wanting to collect on some bets you may have won, as well as make bets on the upcoming fight." After Naruto, Sasuke and Shikamaru settled into the bar to talk with the other adults, Harold and his friends continued their conversation with Shikaku and Choza.
"Well there goes 12,000 ryo," Shikaku complained.
"What about any money you bet on your grandson to win?" Harold asked.
"Everyone who made a bet on the Shikaru-Choba fight either bet on Shikaru to win or on Choba to win," Shikaku explained, "Since neither of the boys won, no one lost any money on that fight."
"Well I'm pissed that my grandson got his butt handed to him," Tsume complained, "By a frigg'en cat-lover, no less! Oh, the humiliation!"
"Well thanks to Haru, I'm 20,000 ryo richer," Harold bragged, then as an afterthought added, "I should buy him something as thanks for helping me get that money."
"Wait until after the fight between Haru and Natsu in a few days," Inoichi suggested to his best friend, "It will be one of the biggest betting events of the year. There'll be fortunes made and lost on that day for sure!"
"A prodigy of the Uchiha clan going up against child who is both the offspring of a Hokage AND an heir to the Hyuga clan's main branch," Choza remarked, "You'd need one of those fancy high-tech machine crossbows to keep people away from seeing that fight!" (4)
Looking to Inoichi and Tsume, Harold said, "Well boys? Who are we going to place our bets on?"
"Haru, obviously," Tsume replied instantly, as if she didn't even have to think about it (not that Tsume, or Harold and Inoichi for that matter, ever thinks anyway).
"Natsu may have Hyuga-style techniques at her disposal, alongside any neat trick she may have picked up from her father Lord Sixth," Inoichi said, "But Haru is an Uchiha! Plus, I'm willing to bet that Haru's movepool consists of skills from both Sasuke AND Sakura."
"Yeah, I'm betting on Haru to win as well," Harold agreed, "Partly because he kicks ass, but mostly because he's my grandnephew. Also, he's LOADS cooler than Salad ever was."
"I'll drink to that!" Tsume agreed, raising her mug of lager in a toast before she took a long chug from it.
Inoichi, Shikaku and Choza all said in unison, "Who the hell is Salad?"
The next day, a large crowd had gathered in the stadium where the second round of the combat portion of the first chunnin exam that Naruto and his friends took place. The seats were nearly packed with spectators, many of whom were on the wealthier end of society. In a special booth were dignitaries usually sat were Naruto, Gaara, and Kurotsuchi, the Hokage, Kazekage and Tsuchikage respectively; Naruto and Gaara also brought along some relatives of theirs (Hinata and Kankuro), and each kage had some guards for them and their loved ones.
"So Naruto," Kankuro said, "Just so you know, I only wore that Maori Warrior outfit to intimidate river dancers that were trying to get new Toonbiicos before me, Inoichi and his Konoha friends. I did NOT mean to upset your kid the way I did."
"Why would you even do that in the first place?" Naruto asked.
"Toonbiicos are serious business," Kankuro explained, his expression becoming very stern.
In response, Naruto simply raised an eyebrow. He then turned to face Gaara and said, "Your brother is weird."
"Try living with him," the Kazekage replied.
"Yo Naruto," Kurotsuchi interjected, "Kankuro bringing up the subject of your kid reminds me. Your kid's actually competing in this fight, ain't she?"
"Yes, yes she is," Naruto replied, "I can't tell you how proud of her I am for her making it this far."
"She's that little blonde midget I saw next to you and your wife when the boys and I came into Konoha for the Lager Fest, right?" Kurotsuchi asked.
Leaning to whisper into Kurotsuchi's right ear, one of her guards said, "Miss Kurotsuchi, I believe that here in Konoha, referring to someone else's small child as a 'midget' is considered to be the height of rudeness."
"Well how the hell am I supposed to know that?" Kurotsuchi whispered back to the guard, "That older Konoha kunoichi I befriended calls kids midgets all the time."
Naruto having heard all of this whispering (he has really good hearing) leaned closer to Hinata and whispered to her, "I'm beginning to think that sending Mr. Fisher and his friends on important missions is not the best idea in the world."
Down in one of the entryways leading into the stadium, Haru and Natsu were both getting ready to head out for their match against each other. Turning to face his soon-to-be opponent, Haru said, "You better give it your all in our fight, Natsu. I'm not saying I want to lose, but I'm also not saying I want the win handed to me."
Nodding slightly, Natsu replied, "I was about to say the same thing, Haru."
"Hey kids!" a voice familiar to Haru and Natsu called out, getting the two of them to turn to see that Tsume and Kuromaru was walking up to them (it was Tsume who called out to them).
"Oh, Bankai's grandma," Haru said as he gave a small waive, "What's up?"
"I just wanted to wish the two of you good luck," Tsume replied, "Granted, I would have liked to see Bankai take part in this round, but I…*sniff* *sniff* Why do I smell cinnamon?"
"Oh, my mother and I stopped off at a cinnamon roll specialty shop earlier for a small breakfast," Natsu explained. Looking mildly embarrassed, Natsu added "Although admittedly, we both ate more than what would qualify as a 'small breakfast'."
Shrugging indifferently, Tsume pulled out two semi-transparent water bottles; one was blue and the other was pink. "You kids should be properly hydrated before the match," said the older Inuzuka woman, tossing the blue water bottle to Haru and the pink one to Natsu.
"Thanks, Bankai's grandma," Haru replied as he and Natsu both chugged down all of the water in their respective bottles.
"Yes, thank you for the water," Natsu said as she and Haru handed their now empty bottles back to Tsume, "That actually helped to get rid of the cinnamon-and-icing taste in my mouth."
"Well then," Tsume replied, "You two go knock each other's socks off, alright?"
A slightly awkward silence lasted a few seconds after Tsume finished talking; Haru broke it by saying, "No one here is wearing socks."
"Even Harold understands the meaning of that figure of speech," Kuromaru thought, "What is wrong with kids these days?"
A few minutes later, Tsume and Kuromaru joined up with Harold and Inoichi up in the bleachers in the stadium. "Where were you, dude?" Harold said the Inuzuka matriarch as she and Kuromaru took their seats.
"I was just giving the kids a bit of a pep talk," Tsume explained, "Told them to give it their all, and to not hold back just because they're an item. That's all."
"Tsume was also kind enough to give Haru and Natsu water bottles to drink from before their fight started," Kuromaru added, "Natsu said that it had the benefit of clearing the taste of cinnamon and icing from her mouth."
"Cinnamon and icing?" Inoichi repeated, sounding slightly confused.
"Natsu and Lord Sixth's wife went to a cinnamon roll specialty shop prior to their arrival here," Tsume explained.
"Oh yeah," Harold remarked in a casual tone, "Hiashi says that Hinata and Natsu both have a liking for cinnamon rolls."
"Thanks to their relation to Lord Sixth, the cinnamon roll specialty shop has seen a substantial boost in customers," Inoichi added.
Down in the arena of the stadium, the chunnin exam proctor who would be presiding over the upcoming match came out; he was a lean yet muscular jonin in his early to mid-twenties, wore the standard Konoha outfit for jonin, and a bandana-style Konoha headband. Long, straight black hair trailed out from under the bandana. "Alright everyone," the exam proctor called out, "The second round of the chunnin exam is about to begin. Will the participants please come out!"
At that prompting, Haru and Natsu both started walking out into the stadium; Haru was rolling his shoulders, trying to limber himself up a bit, whereas Natsu let out a big yawn, struggling to stay awake for some reason. Eventually the two genin reached the center of the arena where the exam proctor stood, then turned to face each other. "This match will be between Haru Uchiha and Natsu Uzumaki," the exam proctor announced. Raising his right hand up quickly, the exam proctor declared loudly, "Begin!"
Both genin jumped back to get some distance from each other, though it seemed to be somewhat tougher for Natsu. Immediately, both genin activated their respective ocular kekkei genkai; Haru and his Sharingan, Natsu and her Byakugan. Up in the bleachers, Harold leaned somewhat towards Inoichi and said, "Dude, it's a Sharingan-Byakugan slugfest! Can you believe that we're actually getting to see those two magic eyes face off against each other?!"
"This is a story that I hope to one-day pass on to my grandchildren," Inoichi remarked, his tone showing that he was very amazed that he got to see this.
"Alright then, Inoichi," Kuromaru remarked in an unamused monotone, "You can talk to your grandkids about this later today."
A look of realization spreading across his face, the Yamanaka patriarch said, "Oh yeah, I already have grandchildren."
"Just focus on the fight you- Woah!" Tsume said, stopping short mid-sentence as something she saw got her attention, "Harold, did you just see what your grandnephew did?! The size of that fireball jitsu he just cast?!"
"That would be my nephew's Uchiha blood at work right there!" Harold replied, beaming with pride.
Down in the arena, Haru had just cast a rather large fireball jitsu at Natsu, who was able to dodge the brunt of the attack; her right leg was grazed by the attack, though, making the Uzumaki girl cry out in pain. She had meant to grunt in pain instead, but her seemingly out-of-nowhere focus and lack of energy caused her to let out a cry instead. "You alright, Natsu?" Haru called out, sounding mildly alarmed.
"I'll *uhn* be fine," Natsu called back, gently brushing the area of her right leg that was grazed by Haru's fireball.
"Sorry if I'm going too rough for you, but my family is watching and I'd hate to disappoint them by not giving it my all," Haru said as he began to weave hand signs, the end result causing his right hand to begin emitting a violent amount of electricity that sounded like the non-stop chirping of hundreds upon hundreds of birds. Haru began to charge right at Natsu, but before he could get close, there was a violent explosion to the side of the arena, causing everyone to look in that direction; some folks were even beginning to panic.
When the dust settled, two men were seen standing amongst a small scattering of rubble. One was slender, had long white hair, and wore white robes, and the other was bulky in a muscular way, had short white hair, and also wore white robes. Both men had the Byakugan for some reason, but that wasn't the oddest thing; both men also had protrusions coming out of their heads and/or faces that clearly showed that neither of them were human.
Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Gaara, Kankuro and Kurotsuchi all jumped down from the bleachers to confront the two mystery men. "Who the hell are you two, and what the hell are you doing here?!" Naruto yelled at the two mystery men.
The first man, the slenderer and more man-pretty of the pair, stepped forward. "I am Momoshiki Otsutsuki," the first man said. Gesturing to his partner, Momoshiki added, "And this is my partner, Kinshiki Otsutsuki."
"We have come looking for the man known as 'Naruto Uzumaki'," Kinshiki stated as business-like as possible.
"Yeah, that would be me," Naruto replied as he faced the two men who were very obviously threats to Konoha, "What the hell do you two want with me?"
"We are here to-" Kinshiki said, but was cut off when something struck him in the forehead, making him fall backwards. After he fell out over the ground, it was seen that he had a crossbow bolt sticking out of his forehead; it was in deep enough to guarantee that Kinshiki was dead.
Quite obviously alarmed, Momoshiki said, "K-Kinshiki!"
"You two sonsabitches!" an angry voice called out, causing all the adults present in the arena to turn to see who it was coming from; they saw Harold, Inoichi, Tsume and Kuromaru run up, with Tsume holding a hand-sized automatic crossbow in her right hand; it was obvious that Tsume, who was the one who called out, was also the one who shot Kinshiki. "You and your buddy here interrupting the fight made my friends and I lose out on a chance to win it big!" Tsume snapped.
"Wait a minute," Shikamaru began to say to the older Inuzuka woman, "I think there's a much more import-"
Sasuke cut Shikamaru off by covering the Nara man's mouth with his right hand, pulling him back and whispering into his ear, "Those two men are obviously big threats to the village. Kiba's mom just killed one of them, and if things end up playing out the way I hope they will, Kiba's mom and her friends will finish off the other one."
As Shikamaru began to relax, Tsume and company continued to chew out Momoshiki. "Your little entrance just now almost hurt my grandnephew, jackass!" Harold snapped angrily, "Now I will show you exactly WHY I'm Konoha's oldest active jonin!"
"Hmph," Momoshiki replied in a smug yet angry tone, "You may have killed Kinshiki by taking us by surprise, but don't think that I will be as easy-" The man-pretty Momoshiki was cut off when, faster than most could have anticipated, Harold punched Momoshiki in the face, over his left eye. The punch landed with such force that Harold unintentionally sent Momoshiki flying into the nearest obstacle.
Getting up, Momoshiki said with a clearly frightened and alarmed look on his face, "Perhaps I have underestimated the shinobi of Konoha. I shall leave you all alive for now, and be thankful; it's not every day that I show such generosity!"
As Momoshiki fled, Kankuro said, "Pfft, that dude? GENEROUS?! He ain't no Rarity, that's for sure!"
"Rarity is the yellow winged-one with the pink mane and tail, right Kankuro?" Gaara asked. (5)
As Kankuro and Inoichi began to chew Gaara out for mixing up names, Shikamaru said, "I think there's more important things going on here, like the fact that a rouge ninja who attacked Konoha during the chunnin exams is escaping and damn, why does that sound so familiar?" As those present began to orient themselves with the situation, a female Konoha chunnin came up to the group to report to Naruto.
"Lord Sixth," the kunoichi said as she saluted Naruto, "The rouge ninja that just fled was seen running due south."
"Alright, we'll head out to take that bastard down," Naruto declared, "Let's form some squads to-"
"Umm, one more thing, Lord Sixth," the kunoichi added, sounding mildly unsure of how to proceed, "Umm, The Hanamaru was stolen."
"Did that Momoshiki person steal it?" Naruto asked.
"Worse," the kunoichi replied, "It was taken by Tsume Inuzuka."
"Wait a minute," Gaara said, "Are you talking about that older Konoha kunoichi that Kankuro is friends with?"
"Before taking it, she also vandalized it," the kunoichi continued, "She took a large paintbrush and a bucket of red paint to cross out the name of The Hanamaru located on both sides of the airship and replaced it with something else."
"What did she replace the ship's name with?" Naruto asked.
"Last I saw," the kunoichi replied, "Tsume Inuzuka renamed the ship The HindenHarold."
"Yes!" Harold said, pumping a fist into the air.
Momoshiki was running through the forests south of Konoha. His partner (and sadly enough, father-figure as well) was dead, and Momoshiki himself was running for dear life; a trio of crazy old people, the one woman of that trio being the one responsible for Kinshiki's death, had halted his plans of taking the Kyubi's chakra from Naruto Uzumaki. The pink-haired man of the trio of crazy old people had also given Momoshiki a very brutal punch to the face. So damaging was the punch that, combined with the fact that Kinshiki was killed, made Momoshiki decide Konoha was far too dangerous a place right now.
"I'll have to reconsider and recalculate a number of things," Momoshiki said aloud to himself as he fled through the southern woods, "I'll first have to come up with a plan to neutralize those three crazy old people. I should also neutralize that dog the old woman had as well, just to be on the safe side."
As Momoshiki ran, he heard a very loud intercom turn on, followed by Tsume's voice calling out from the intercom in a menacing sing-song tone, "Oh Momoshiki!"
Looking up, Momoshiki saw that The Hanamaru was flying on a collision course towards the ground; what's worse, it was aimed right at him. Too exhausted and hurt to flee, Momoshiki could only watch in horror as Konoha's first airship flew right at him. In the last few seconds of his life, Momoshiki was able to see Tsume, who was the only one aboard The Hanamaru, through the front window of the control room of the airship. Momoshiki could also see Tsume's mouth move as her voice sounded from over the intercom, "SSSSUUUUUCK MMMMMYYYY CUUUUUUUUU-"
*CRASH* *SMASH* *BOOM* *POW* And thus, Momoshiki, Tsume and The Hanamaru went up in an explosive inferno of brilliant scarlet flames.
A few minutes later, Harold, Inoichi, Kuromaru, Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Gaara, Kankuro, Kurotsuchi, and various shinobi guards from Konoha, Suna, and Iwa all arrived to the scene of the crashing of The Hanamaru. After a short while, the gathered shinobi were able to extract Momoshiki's charred remains from the rubble; if it wasn't for the fact that bits of white cloth were still attached to the smoldering remains, the body would be unrecognizable.
"The first major assault Konoha has suffered in almost twenty years," Sasuke remarked, "And before this one got anywhere near as serious as the last one, it was stopped. By my uncle-in-law and his friends, no less."
"Let us not forget the valiant sacrifice of the greatest dude of all," Harold replied in a somber tone as he, Inoichi and Kankuro all held their right hands over their chests, "Tsume Inuzuka, a true man among men."
"Kiba's mom was a woman, you guys," Shikamaru said to the older shinobi and Kankuro.
"And I still am!" Tsume's voice called out. Everyone turned to the direction that Tsume's voice came from; to their surprise, Tsume Inuzuka herself had emerged from the ruined remains of The Hanamaru, relatively unharmed.
"Mrs. Inuzuka! How did you survive?!" Naruto exclaimed as he and the others all ran up to the Inuzuka matriarch.
Pulling a small black-colored egg-shaped item out of her flask jacket, Tsume said, "I used the Pod Shield that I had in my flask jacket. Apparently, it has a function where the user is completely encased in a protective pod. I was kept safely in a cocoon of hard-as-hell metal!"
"Thank goodness for ever-advancing technology!" Harold declared as he, Tsume, Inoichi and Kankuro all shared a good laugh. Kuromaru could only just shake his head.
"Natsu was drugged?!" Naruto exclaimed angrily; a few days after the Momoshiki/Kinshiki incident caused the chunnin exams to be canceled mid-way through, Harold and his friends (minus Kankuro, who returned to Suna with Gaara and their guards) were speaking to Naruto in his office in the Hokage office building. In addition to Harold, Inoichi, Tsume, Kuromaru and Naruto, Sasuke and Shikamaru were also present.
"I noticed it when the boys and I were watching your daughter's match against Harold's grandnephew," Tsume said, "So after the lot of us returned to Konoha and I took a shower to get rid of that annoying explosion smell I had, I decided to do a little snooping around. To my disgust, I learned that the folks who run the cinnamon roll specialty shop that your wife and daughter like to frequent slipped the drug into your daughter's order."
"The drug, as the investigation Sasuke and I did found out, saps one's energy and stamina, as well as make it difficult for one to properly mold chakra in order to use jitsu," Shikamaru interjected.
"Why would those bastards drug my daughter?" Naruto muttered angrily, holding his hand to his face.
"We learned that the owners of the cinnamon roll specialty shop had placed a lot of ryo on Haru to win his match against your daughter, Lord Sixth," Harold explained, "I mean, I myself was hoping Haru would win, but I'd never go so far as to cheat like that to ensure the results that I desired!"
"If anyone ever drugged my daughter," Inoichi began, "I'd cleave their asses off, have the assed taxidermied and stuffed, then hung over my fireplace!"
Looking to his father-in-law, Shikamaru said, "That sounds like some over-the-top overreaction from a kid's cartoon."
"I got it from an episode of this cartoon that I watched with Inohime earlier this morning," Inoichi admitted.
"Well, given a combination of the cinnamon roll specialty shop's owners drugging Natsu, and the attack of those two guys that Mrs. Inuzuka ended up killing," Naruto said, "The results of the end of the chunnin exams are going to have to be declared inconclusive."
Looking to the three older ninja and giving them a knowing look, Naruto said, "I'm going to guess that any money that was placed on the outcome of the match won't end up changing hands."
"All bets that were made were either 'Haru wins' or 'Natsu wins'," Inoichi informed Naruto, "No one even considered the possibility of powerful ninja attacking Konoha midway through the second round of the combat portion of the chunnin exams."
"Damn!" Shikamaru exclaimed, "Why the hell does that sound so damn familiar?!"
As most of the other ninja began to laugh, Tsume thought to herself, "They must never know."
END, CHAPTER TEN
Author's notes:
(1) Hanamaru should roughly translate to 'flower boy'.
(2) A play on the name of The Hindenburg; you heard about how THAT turned out, right?
(3) Iruka is semi-secretly a fan of the 'Sabrina the teenage witch' series, hence why his cat his named Salem.
(4) Again, the lack of guns in this world had led to some very…creative…variations on the crossbow.
(5) Gaara thinks that every character in MLP: FIM is called Rarity, much like how some parents think every Pokémon is called Pikachu.
Well firstly, since this chapter whent up on 7-4-17, happy Independence Day. Anywho, due to some unforseen business coming in that I will have to attend to, I have no idea when I'll be able to upload the next chapter. Additionally, I'm also working on a few other story ideas which I might put up. Please bear with me.
EDIT 7-17-16: Corrected some spelling/grammar mistakes.