Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any properties in this work that I did not make myself.
Harold of Konoha
Chapter nineteen: Welcome home, Nara family! (AKA The one wherein they get a Cool House)
One day in Konohagakure, around the early to middle part of October, Harold Fisher, Inoichi Yamanaka and Tsume Inuzuka, plus Tsume's ninja dog Kuromaru, were in the living room of a large and relatively new house, located near the Hokage office building. As no one was currently living in said house, the living room (along with every other room in the house) was empty. In the living room with the older ninjas was Shikamaru Nara and Sasuke Uchiha.
"Wow, Lord Sixth picked a good house for you and your kin, huh Shikamaru?" Harold remarked in an amazed tone as he scanned the living room.
"Plus it's located near the Hokage office building," Shikamaru pointed out, "Meaning that I have to walk much less of a distance to head to work as Naruto's advisor."
"Yeah, he set you and my daughter up with a nice home," Inoichi said, "This here living room has plenty of space for your kids to run around in."
"Heh," Shikamaru laughed in a good-natured tone, "Inohime will probably be the only one to do any running around. Shikaru is older and more mature."
"You and your family aren't going to have to end up selling this place because suddenly receiving such a large home will make your utility bills go through the roof, are you?" Tsume asked in a concerned tone. (1)
"The expenses for Shikamaru's new home are mostly covered by Konoha's government, as he is technically an employee to said government," Sasuke pointed out, "And his utility bills won't be any worse than what he's used to." Looking around the large living room, Sasuke said, "The only thing about receiving a new home like this that Shikamaru and his folks will actually have to worry about covering the cost of will be furnishing the place. You know, buying furniture and other things like that."
"Oh sweet skies above, Ino and I completely forgot that!" Shikamaru exclaimed, smacking himself in the forehead.
"…If you want, I have some options for wallpaper you can use for your kids' respective rooms," Inoichi offered his son-in-law.
"Inoichi, keep in mind that your son-in-law pointed out that Shikaru is around twelve to thirteen," Kuromaru began, "I'm pretty sure that he's a bit too old for firetruck wallpaper."
"But Inohime will still like the wallpaper that I picked out for her, right?" Inoichi asked in a mildly concerned tone.
"Given that your granddaughter is only four, I figured that the Frozen wallpaper you picked out will be met with squeals of delight," the Inuzuka ninja dog answered.
Sighing in relief, Inoichi said, "Well thank goodness I got at least one thing right."
"Well the house is covered by me technically being a government employee," Shikamaru said, "And as Sasuke pointed out, my bills won't be any worse than they were before. But aside from that, my family and I are pretty much out of luck! We lost most of our belongings in the fire, and it's not like we have the money to replace everything!"
Looking to his friends, Harold said with a mischievous smile, "Boys, you all thinking what I'm thinking?"
"We offer the firetruck wallpaper to your grandnephew?" Inoichi suggested.
"Haru's the same age as Shikaru, Mr. Yamanaka," Sasuke pointed out.
"No, that's not what I had in mind," Harold replied with a gentle shake of his head. Looking his friends in their eyes, Harold said, "Fundraiser."
"Fundraiser?" Inoichi, Tsume and Kuromaru repeated in a mildly confused tone.
"Fundraiser?" Shikamaru and Sasuke repeated in a mildly concerned tone.
"Fundraiser," Harold replied in a confidant tone, "Everyone outside of Shikamaru and his family will work together to raise the moolah that Shikamaru and his family needs to refurbish their new home."
"That's one of the nicest things I've ever heard anyone offer to do for me," Shikamaru remarked in a touched but mildly concerned tone, "But how exactly are you planning to do this whole fundraiser thing?"
"Shikamaru, dude, you weren't supposed to find out about the plan!" Harold exclaimed, "Now the surprise is spoiled!"
"Mr. Fisher, you literally just came up with this plan," Shikamaru pointed out, "WHILE I was present and within earshot."
"…Oh yeah," Harold replied in a mildly dumbfounded tone.
To Shikamaru, Sasuke whispered, "Now you see what I have to put up with."
The next morning, Hogato Hyuga, the seventeen-year-old son of Udon and Hanabi, got together with the two teenage girls that he's friends with. "So what's the plan again, Fumika?" Hogato asked the first of his two friends, the slim girl with blonde hair.
"We're going to livestream the three of us taking on multiple bosses in Final Fantasy Explorers," Fumika explained as she gestured to herself, Hogato and the other girl, the chubby one with red hair, "Before that, we'll set up a donation line that viewers can drop money into as they watch the livestream."
"We're also going to offer some incentives for viewers of the livestream to make donations," the chubby girl added, "Like tackling a particular boss, or doing a certain quest, or using a specific party build for a boss raid."
"After the livestream ends, we'll take what money we've collected and pool it with whatever money the other Konoha folk raising funds managed to collect so that the Naras can refurbish their new home," Fumika finished.
"…I get to stay in the Knight job, right?" Hogato asked.
"Unless one viewer specifically requests a party build that doesn't include Knights, then yes," Fumika replied.
"Wait a minute," the chubby girl said, "Hogato, didn't you say that your cousin Natsu also plays Final Fantasy Explorers?"
"Yes I did," Hogato replied, "She played as a White Mage for most of the time she's played the game, but has recently switched to Ranger once she discovered what the Stardust technique can do." (2)
"Well why don't we ask her to join us?" Fumika suggested, "That will bring the party count to the maximum of four."
"You said she switched from White Mage to Ranger, right?" the chubby girl asked Hogato, "Because I'm the group's White Mage."
"Yes, yes, Lady Natsu is currently rolling as a Ranger," Hogato replied, "There's no need to worry about her stealing your thunder as the White Mage."
"So, do you think she'd be willing to join us in our livestream?" Fumika asked.
"I'm pretty sure she would love the chance to do some multiplayer with the maximum number of people," Hogato replied, "The only time she ever gets to do multiplayer is when she and I have the time to do so."
"Oh yeah, that reminds me," the chubby girl began, "What kind of stuff did you guys do?"
Over at the Akimichi clan diner, Harold and his friends were having their morning coffee. "So what's the plan, boys?" Tsume asked her companions.
"I was thinking that since we got the supercar finished, we can use it as a means to raise money for Inoichi's daughter and her family," Harold suggested.
"How so?" Inoichi asked.
"Well I mean, come on, guys," Harold began, "It's a supercar that is a fusion of the General Lee, KITT, the DeLorean and the Batmobile. We can, you know, sell rides in the supercar. Or something."
"Hmm…" Kuromaru responded, "…It sounds like a good idea on the surface. As long as whoever drives the car doesn't try to pull any stupid stunts or anything else along those lines, then I don't see any problem with the plan."
"So it's agreed," Tsume declared as she stood up, "We'll sell rides in the supercar as our part in the fundraiser!"
"Who's going to be the driver, though?" Inoichi asked.
"Well not Tsume, obviously," Kuromaru stated, "She got her license suspended again. Hell, I'm genuinely surprised that she even managed to get her license back, much less even GET a license in the first place!"
"Oh shut up, Kuromaru," Tsume replied in an annoyed tone.
"Hey Inoichi," Harold began, "Why don't YOU be the driver?"
"Huh? Why me?" Inoichi asked.
"The supercar was built in your garage," Harold explained, "So in a way, the supercar is sort of like your baby."
"…Hey, hey yeah," Inoichi replied as the fact slowly dawned on him, "The supercar is sort of like my baby!" Standing up from his seat, Inoichi said, "I'll do it!"
"Hells yeah!" Harold said in an excited manner, standing up from his own seat so that he and the other humans can do a group high five.
Over in the village of Sunagakure, Gaara, the current Kazekage, was sitting at his desk in the Kazekage office building. Gaara was currently on the phone with Naruto, who was in Konoha. "Well that certainly sounds nice of everyone," Gaara remarked over the phone, "And only your friend Shikamaru knows? …Really, now. Well that's interesting. Can I catch the livestream right now? …So that's the name of the channel? Okay, thank you."
After Gaara hung up the phone, he turned to his computer, got onto the internet, and went to the appropriate site to watch the livestream that Naruto told him about. As Gaara watched the livestream on his computer, he heard Kankuro call out, "Hey, Gaara. I'm heading out for a bit, alright?"
"Alright," Gaara replied, "Hey Kankuro, Naruto's kid and her older cousin are doing a livestream on the internet to help raise funds for-"
Gaara looked up from his computer to look at Kankuro, and as a result he stopped midsentence when he saw what Kankuro was wearing; a white robe-like gown with a rich purple mozzetta (3) over it, and a white mitre (4) with a purple trim the same shade as the mozzetta. In the center on the front of the mitre was the image of three four-sided diamond that were closely grouped together. The last thing that Gaara noticed was that Kankuro was carrying a crosier in his right hand; it was topped with a metal symbol that resembled the three diamonds on Kankuro's mitre. "…Did you lose a bet?" Gaara asked.
"What?" Kankuro replied in a confused tone. After a few seconds, Kankuro said, "Oh, you mean my outfit! No, no little brother, I didn't lose a bet. I'm heading to my weekly meeting with the rest of the guys in the fan club I started."
"And your outfit is for…" the Kazekage said, expecting to be filled in.
"Oh, as I am president of the fan club, I got this outfit custom made," Kankuro explained, "I gotta look the part of a fan club president, am I right?"
"…I have long since ceased to question anything you do," Gaara replied, "I find that having done so helps to preserve what little bit of sanity I might still have."
"Well anywho, I shall be taking my leave," Kankuro said, "Go with peace, little brother." After Kankuro left, Gaara turned his attention back to the computer screen.
"…Naruto wouldn't even believe me," Gaara said to himself as he resumed watching the livestream.
Back in Konoha, Choba Akimichi, Shibei Aburame, Bankai Inuzuka and Bankai's ninja dog Rojomaru were going door to door selling snacks. "Why couldn't we let Shikaru help us?" Bankai asked.
"Because it's his folks that everyone, including us, are raising funds for," Choba pointed out, "It'd be kind of counterintuitive to have him help us. Besides, Shikaru and his folks aren't supposed to know that anyone's doing this."
"Choba raised an excellent point," Shibei agreed with a nod.
"Hmph," Bankai replied with a huff, "So tell me. Whose idea was it to go door to door selling snacks?"
"Well none of us could have come up with a better idea to help raise funds," Choba pointed out, "So selling snacks door to door is what we're doing."
"That doesn't answer my question," Bankai replied, "Whose idea was this?!"
"My mother suggested it," Choba replied with a mildly stern look on his face.
Realizing that he was just about to insult Choba's mom and thus pissing Choba off, Bankai said, "Umm…well okay then."
Over in Naruto's office over at the Hokage office, Naruto was talking to someone on the phone. "…You're actually wrong, Gaara," Naruto said into the phone, "I've seen Kankuro in the outfit that you just described to me. So, are you watching that livestream that I told you about? …Oh, me? I'm actually watching it right now. Yeah, my daughter, her cousin and the cousin's friends are taking on some four-legged robot called Omega and holy crap one I think that my daughter's character just landed the killing blow!" (5)
As Naruto talked on the phone and watched the livestream, Sasuke and Shikamaru came walking into the office. "Hey Naruto, got a sec?" Sasuke asked.
"Yes, just give me a minute," Naruto replied to his advisors. Into the phone, Naruto said, "Sorry, that was Sasuke and Shikamaru. Yeah, I'll have to call you back." After Naruto hung up, he looked to the guys and said, "Sorry, I was just letting Gaara know about the livestream that Natsu, Hogato and two of Hogato's friends are doing. What's up?"
"Did you ever give my father-in-law and his friends the go ahead to build that supercar that they wanted to build?" Shikamaru asked.
"I specifically told them not to build it," Naruto replied instantly, "Even IF it was going to be part General Lee. …Why do you ask?"
"Not only did they went ahead and built it anyway," Shikamaru explained, "But they're using it as their part in the fundraiser via selling rides in it."
"…Why am I not surprised that those three completely ignored me?" Naruto asked rhetorically, with a surprising lack of anger in his tone.
"Now before you get too mad at them," Sasuke began, "Shikamaru and I would like to point out that they've actually managed to raise quite a hefty sum."
"…Really?" Naruto asked, looking mildly surprised.
"Out of all of the groups contributing to the fundraiser, Sakura's uncle and his friends are in the lead for most money raised," Sasuke pointed out as he pulled out a folded-up sheet of paper and unfolded it so he could read it, "At the time this list was written up, they had twenty-five percent more money raised than the second leading group."
"Which is Natsu and the teenagers, surprisingly enough," Shikamaru remarked as he leaned slightly so he could take a quick peek at the list. At Naruto's request, Sasuke handed him the list he pulled out and unfolded.
After scanning the list, Naruto remarked in a genuinely surprised tone, "…Huh. Maybe I won't tear them a new one after all, if this information is accurate."
"I think that the chance to ride in a quote unquote 'supercar' seems to be a rather alluring thing for the good folks of Konoha to try," Shikamaru said.
"Excuse me, excuse me!" a young adult voice called out. All three men turned their attention in the direction of the office doorway, which an early twenties office worker just dashed through. Handing a sheet of paper to Sasuke, the office worker said, "This is an updated copy of the list detailing how much each group participating in the fundraiser has collected so far."
Taking a look at the list, Sasuke said in an unsurprised monotone, "…Yup. That seems about right."
"What? What seems about right?" Naruto asked.
In response, Sasuke simply handed Naruto the list. After he read it, Naruto said, "…Huh. I might even let them keep that supercar of theirs, when this is all said and done."
Over at a community center in Sunagakure, a number of folks, most of which were grown men, were sitting in folding chairs arranged in such a manner that made the room they were in look like a make-shift church room. This apparent religious atmosphere was further bolstered by the fact that on the platform at the end of the room that the chairs were in, there was a pulpit.
A guy who, judging by his looks was in his early to mid-twenties, was dressed as if he was a catholic priest, got up on stage and spoke to the gathered folks. "Now presenting his holiness, Pope Elusive the Generous," the priest-like guy declared, drawing applause from the audience as Kankuro, dressed in his full regalia from earlier, got up on stage and approached the pulpit.
"Thank you, fellow children of the Lord," (6) Kankuro said to the gathered folk, "Now normally, we would first cover recent happenings in the fandom. However, a fellow member of our order is in desperate need of our aide."
After the crowd talked amongst themselves for about a minute, Kankuro continued, "The head of our order's branch in Konoha is working desperately to help raise the funds needed to allow a family that lost practically everything in a house fire to rebuild their lives. A house was provided to them by Konoha's government, and bills and the such won't be a problem. The problem for the family lies in the fact that they have no money to buy the various things they need to refurbish their new home, like furniture and maybe a fancy vase. They also need clothing, personal hygiene products, dishes and silverware, and other household items that most take for granted."
"I appeal to you, fellow children of the Lord," Kankuro proclaimed, "To join together, hand in hand, to help this Konoha family get back on their feet!" The gathered folks all began cheering; some even threw various hats into the air. Seeing this outpouring of obvious support, Kankuro could not help but smile.
Back in Konoha, Harold was waiting by a dining table that was outside and on the side of a road. Waiting with Harold was Tsume and Kuromaru. "So how are we doing?" Harold asked.
"Even taking into account the fact that we had to use some of the money we raised to buy more gas for the supercar," Kuromaru began, "We're still making a very considerable profit. I daresay that the four of us alone may have raised enough money to cover any refurbishing expenses that Inoichi's daughter's family will need to get their life back on track."
"Yeah, I've been meaning to talk to the lot of you about that," a familiar voice called out, startling Harold and company and making them all turn around to see Naruto standing behind them. With him was Sasuke and Shikamaru.
"Uhh…" Harold began, following Naruto's line of sight and seeing that it was aimed at a sign (a bunch of large, bold black writing on a large sheet of bright yellow construction paper) taped to the table that read 'Rides in the Supercar: 1000 ryo for five minutes'. "…We can explain, Lord Sixth," Harold continued. At that moment, the supercar pulled up to the scene; coming out of it was Inoichi (from the driver's side door) and Hiashi (from the passenger side door).
"So what do you think, man?" Inoichi asked the Hyuga clan lord.
"I wasn't aware that my son-in-law permitted you and your friends to build this supercar," Hiashi remarked in a genuinely surprised tone.
"I didn't," Naruto called out, getting Inoichi and Hiashi to turn and face Naruto.
"…I can explain, Lord Sixth," Inoichi said, wide-eyed with worry.
"Why am I not surprised that you went behind his back again?" Hiashi muttered to himself as he face-palmed and shook his head in shame.
"Look, we're doing this to raise money for the fundraiser," Harold began, "We're being super careful, and no one's gotten hurt! I swear to Knuckles the Echidna!"
"It's true, Lord Sixth," Kuromaru remarked, "Tsume and her friends have been completely responsible, and have not once done anything stupid today. Hell, they've even managed to raise a considerable amount of money for the fundraiser!"
"We know about that," Sasuke replied as he got out a sheet of paper, "It says here that out of all of the groups that have been participating in the fundraiser, your group has raised the most money by far."
"It far outpaces the second leading group," Naruto remarked, "And they aren't being slouches either."
"So we…aren't in trouble?" Tsume asked hopefully.
"I am going to have to reprimand the lot of you for going behind my back," Naruto replied, drawing a disappointed 'aww' from each of the older ninjas that had a part in building the supercar. "However," Naruto continued, "Keep in mind that since the lot of you going behind my back on the mater concerning the supercar led to such a turnout for your part in the fundraiser, the reprimand will be done just for the sake of formality."
Hearing this raised the hopes of Harold and his group, with Inoichi even saying, "Really, Lord Sixth?"
"I've even decided to let you three keep the supercar," Naruto continued, drawing cheers from Harold and his friends. Naruto cut the cheers off by adding, "Provided, of course, that for the rest of the day, the three of you keep up the good behavior and responsibility that Kuromaru says you've been showing so far."
"So we…" Tsume replied, "…Have an accord?"
"…Don't push it, Mrs. Inuzuka," Naruto responded as he gave the Inuzuka matriarch an unamused look. (7)
"Oh come on, I've been working on my Barbosa impersonation for weeks!" Tsume exclaimed. The Hokage sighed in a resigned tone as Sasuke could only shake his head; Shikamaru, to his credit, found that Tsume's impersonation of a fictional pirate to be funny enough to laugh at.
Late afternoon that Friday, a crowd of people were gathered outside of a large shipping truck that was parked in front of a house. Standing in the front of the crowd was Shikamaru and his family; standing nearby was Naruto, Sasuke, Gaara, Kankuro (wearing his full 'religious' outfit) Harold, Inoichi, Feather Edge, Tsume and Kuromaru. "So why is there a really big truck parked here?" Shikaru asked as he pointed at the truck.
"Why is that big bird creature thing my dad is friends with here?" Ino asked. (8)
"We can discuss that later," Naruto replied, getting the attention of Shikamaru and his family. "So look," Naruto began, "I know the lot of you lost pretty much everything a while ago when your house caught fire. Well, a few of us got together to try and remedy that."
Turning to face the cab of the moving truck, Naruto shouted, "Alright Hal, move it!" After the moving truck started up and drove down to stop blocking the view, Shikamaru's family was shocked to see the new house.
"It's big!" Inohime exclaimed.
"Yeah, that's putting things one way, little sis," Shikaru remarked.
"Th-this is just too much," Ino remarked as she started to tear up a bit.
"What, you didn't think I was going to let you all go homeless for long, did you?" Naruto asked in a mock-wounded tone, "Oh Ino, you wound me."
"And don't worry about buying things like clothes and stuff," Sasuke said to the Naras, "Some groups got together to raise the money you'll guys need to cover that."
"The real check will be presented to you guys sometime tomorrow," Naruto said, "But due to the nature of this whole thing, I was advised to allow the symbolic presentation of a comically oversized check, as the media will need something to report on."
"So what, you're going to hand us the comically oversized check?" Shikamaru asked.
"Actually, that honor goes to the group that raised the most money in the fundraiser," Naruto replied, "Which, surprisingly enough, ended up being Ino's dad and his friends."
"BOOYA!" Inoichi exclaimed as he and the others walked up and presented them with a comically oversized check, which the media members that were present at the time wasted no time in catching on tape and on camera.
As the Naras accepted the comically oversized check, Shikamaru whispered to Inoichi, "Hey Mr. Yamanaka, thanks again for the save."
"Tell Lord Sixth for me that the boys and I said thanks again for letting us keep the supercar," Inoichi whispered back.
Chuckling despite himself, Shikamaru replied, "Sure thing, Mr. Yamanaka. Sure thing."
The following evening, as the last of the new furniture got moved into place, Shikamaru said to Ino, "Boy, we certainly have come a long way from living with your parents, huh Ino?"
"I'm just glad that we no longer have to be a bother to my mom and dad," Ino remarked, "Although I bet that the kids will miss getting to have so much time with their grandparents. Inohime especially."
"Your dad DID write and publish one of her favorite books," Shikamaru remarked, "And that he likes Ponies just as much as Inohime."
"Speaking of which," Ino remarked, "Did you see the outfit Gaara's brother was wearing?"
"Yeah I did," Shikamaru remarked, "But keep in mind that no less than half of Sunagakure's total population are fans of that show."
Nodding, Ino replied, "I know that. I just wasn't aware that Gaara's brother was such a huge Rarity fan." (9)
Sitting down in a chair in the living room, Shikamaru gave a content-sounding sigh and said, "It's good to finally be home."
END, CHAPTER NINETEEN
Author's Notes:
(1) Sound familiar?
(2) It basically calls down a bunch of meteors from the sky to blow stuff all to hell.
(3) It's a cloak-like garment that mostly just covers the shoulder area.
(4) It's the tall, somewhat diamond-shaped hat thing that the pope wears.
(5) Courtesy of her Stardust technique.
(6) You know who it is.
(7) You can probably guess why a ninja wouldn't find pirate-themed humor to be funny.
(8) You didn't think that the hippogriff who took part in saving the Naras from the fire that destroyed their home would miss the ceremony where said family was given their new home, did you?
(9) Ino is the only adult character in this story who is not a fan of Ponies but can correctly identify more than four characters from it. Naruto and Gaara, on the other hand…
So this is chapter nineteen for you. Chapter twenty will be the Halloween special chapter, which I hope to have up in time for Halloween.