Misery

Disclaimer: I do not own Alfie Solomons or any other characters from the franchise.

Everything had been so full of bliss. They couldn't have been happier together. It just felt right until it wasn't. 5 years of blissful happiness that came crumbling down in what seemed an instant.

Hazel knew what she was getting herself into with a man like Alfie Solomons. In plain words a gangster who was more vicious and dangerous than he was kind, to everyone but her. She saw a different side of him than he let almost anyone else see.

Most thought Alfie didn't care about anyone but himself and while he led people to believe this it couldn't be further from the truth. He took care of the Jewish community immensely through such things as donating to various charities for those in need. He took care of those close to him. Like Ollie, regardless of the verbal beatings Alfie gave him, he'd do anything for the boy.

And she knew just how well he could look after someone he loved so deeply. Hazel never asked for expensive material things because that just wasn't the kind of person she was. That didn't stop him from gifting her such things when the moment called for it like her birthday, anniversaries and so on.

It was always the little things that made her smile the most. Like when she'd wake up to another bunch of lavender when the last one was all used up from her baths because he knew how much she loved the scent. He'd be lying if he said he didn't love how the scent mixed with her own.

Hazel loved the life she created with this bear of a man she couldn't imagine being apart from for any reason. But things changed. Too much for her liking that she started questioning things. Alfie's work started pulling him away from home more and at first she was okay with that because s heknew how important his work was to him. She didn't agree with the choices he made as far as the lifestyle he led but she had loved the man too much.

Had.

No, Hazel still loved him, but it was slowly killing her how she barely saw the man anymore. It started with just a day here and there that he didn't come home for dinner. She wouldn't see him until midnight if not later. Then it turned into more days of this until some nights he wouldn't return until well into the morning before waking up a few hours later and heading back to work again.

She approached him a few times about it and how she was missing him. The response was always the same.

"Pet, you know I miss you too, right? I hate it as much as you, yeah. But, things 'ave been getting' busier as of late. If I could control it, I would, right? This won't last forever, love, I promise."

And things would change for a bit and she would see him home more frequently. He really would try. But it gave her false hope thinking everything was getting better only for things to start repeating two weeks later if not less.

The worst sting of all was him missing Hazel's birthday. He never missed her birthday and always helped make it the best he could. But he didn't even come home for it this year. The only indication that he didn't forget what day it was, was the small box he left on his pillow for her to wake up to. It did nothing but cause the frown on her face to deepen.

Hazel dreamed of a vacation away from Camden Town to Margate where it was just the two of them. Rolling around in bed together or strolling along the beach in the beautiful weather. Anything but the same routine of waiting for her husband to come home and staring at walls that didn't comfort her.

Being alone so much for months in that big house of theirs caused her to eventually hate when he actually was home. She found herself picking fights with him just because everything frustrated her. Frustrated her so much because she knew he would eventually leave again some hours later and wouldn't be back until who knows when.

It was one of those rare nights that Alfie found his way home. Another long day at the bakery and dealing with Tommy Shelby's nonsense, Alfie just wanted to sleep.

He crept up the stairs as quietly as he could knowing Hazel was already asleep since it was well past midnight. Alfie wasn't quiet enough and when he opened the bedroom door she was sitting up to see what the noise was only to find it was her husband.

She scoffed before laying back down barely even looking at him.

"Any louder and you'll wake up all of Camden Town."

"'m sorry, love, didn't mean to wake you, yeah?" He said as he took off his work clothes as quickly as possible so he could lay in a proper bed for once.

"Yeah, well you did, didn't you?"

Alfie sighed laying in bed as she moved as far away from him without rolling off the bed.

This is what their relationship had come to. She hated how she was treating him because it truly wasn't fair to him especially when he didn't treat her any differently. Even when she spoke so bitterly to him, he still spoke to her and looked at her as if she were the most important thing in the world. It wasn't fair to him but how was it fair to her that she practically lived all alone except for Cyril who was always there waiting for Alfie with her.

Hazel cried as she thought about what she was going to do once he made an appearance again. It ripped her apart on the inside but how could she do this anymore? She left everything to be with Alfie and now some years later she barely even had him anymore. Maybe it would be better for both of them if she left. He wouldn't have to worry about her and she wouldn't be here wondering if and when she'd see him again just for things to be so cold between them.

It was two days later when Alfie came home. Surprisingly, it was earlier than the usual time he made an appearance. Hazel was just cleaning up her dishes from dinner when he walked into the kitchen to greet her. Her heart stopped and for a moment she almost hesitated. But she couldn't. They couldn't keep doing this. Either of them.

"Hi love." He said tiredly as he moved around the kitchen to grab some dinner.

Wiping the last plate dry, she replied softly, "Hi Fie." She felt like a monster for what she was about to do.

Alfie sat at the kitchen table digging into his food and looked up as she sat down across from him. He lifted an eyebrow at her as he asked, "Somethin' wrong, love? You look upset. Did somethin' happen while I was gone?"

Gone. He was always gone.

The tears started as she opened her mouth. "Fie, I can't do this anymore."

His fork hit the plate loudly as he dropped it. The look on his face broke her heart even more. She hated herself for doing this but how could this keep going on?

"Pet, what ya talkin' about? What can't you do anymore?" He asked hoping he was reading this entire situation wrong.

Hazel cried even harder because how could he ask as if he didn't know?

"Us, Alfie! I can't keep living in this house sitting and waiting for when you come home. You're never here anymore and when you are, it's not enough. You're gone as fast as you get back."

Alfie was so quiet. He always had something to say so for him to just sit before her in silence just made this even worse. She knew she was hurting him.

So softly she almost didn't hear him, Alfie asked, "Don't ya love me anymore?"

She felt her heart crack.

"Of course, I love you, Fi-", she tried but Alfie interrupted her.

"Then how can you leave?" He said frantically while slamming his hand on the table causing her to jump.

She didn't know what else to say.

"I'm sorry, Fie. I just can't do this anymore. I miss my husband, but you hardly even try anymore."

"Love, I've told you the bakery's been busier with the more deals we've been doing and if I could control it I would. I can tr-"

"Fie, stop. We can't keep continuing this endless cycle. It's not fair." Hazel sobbed.

The look on his face was one she never saw directed at her before. She knew he was hurt and his only way of dealing with it was by anger.

"Alrigh'. You don't want this anymore, Fine." He spat as he got up from the table and went for Cyril's lead.

"What are you doing, Fie?"

He scoffed wishing she would stop calling him that. "Doin' what I do best, yeah? I'm going back to my office. You want to leave go 'head. I'm not stoppin' you."

She collapsed at the table and cried harder than she ever had in her life.

Just like that he was gone. And so was she only a few days later.