Alternative Route Taken

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Another What If based on the episode, A Deadly Game, what happened if Rick didn't return to the precinct after leaving and this was really their last case. What would each other's lives have looked like? The story starts with Canon dialog, courtesy of Dust Jackets Dot Com, then goes quickly and completely AU. The journey continues with a new Kate and Rick, hope you enjoy!

I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only, except the ones I create.

Previously

"I know Kate, I was outside, but I let you have your moment, look, I know you love him, and well I don't know what the future is going to bring but I'll tell you this, I'm not walking away. I said till death due us part, and damn it he is testing it just like I knew he would," Gina half laughed, half cried.

Rick was fighting to hear more, wait, Kate kissed him, and he was married to Gina, Kate told Gina, and she wasn't angry? What world was he living in? That would have been a Cat Fight to end all fights, wait, did Gina and Kate know each other? How?

"You heard me tell him I love him, Gina, well it's true, it's way too late now but, the more I say it the easier it gets. I just wish he were awake for us all, then maybe I could gauge how he would react; I mean he left thinking I had no feelings for him at all, I was such an ass"

"Well you won't get an argument from any of us, but that was then Kate, this is now, let's just try to be here WHEN he wakes up, and damn it, Rick, wake up, I know you can hear us talking about you. You always knew when I did, so I know you do now, Sweetheart, please wake up."

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Chapter 22

Later That Day

Walter Reid Hospital

Rick's POV

It seemed almost as fast as he was awake, he was back asleep again, this time by design. The doctors had to remove the tracheostomy tube that was inserted through a cut in his neck below the vocal cords. When he first received medical attention, it was done so by the meatball surgeons as they were called, not taking time to look pretty, just to keep him alive.

The tube allowed air to enter the lungs after they repaired the collapsed lungs. They had bagged him as was referred to with one forcing air into his lungs using the bellows methodology. All Rick knew was his throat was sore, and hurt like hell, but what part of his body didn't.

Even though he was awake, they restricted visitors until the could get some medical procedures done, his catheter removal was painful, but oh so welcome, even though they made him use a damn wheelchair to go to the restroom. Next was the damn feeding tube, whoever told you this won't hurt, should go back and have something yanked from their body before telling such a gross mistruth.

Perhaps the entire highlight of waking up came when the hairstylist Alexis had booked showed up, and was allowed to cut his hair, and shave him, except for within one inch of the trachea wound. It was cleaned, and antibiotic applied, and covered with a sterile bandage, and then the most tiring part of the first day, a shower.

The therapists had special suits that allowed them to enter the shower and assist with the routine, Rick couldn't tell if they were male or female, nor did he care, it just felt so good to be cleaned, more than the sponge baths they, well someone, probably Gina had been giving him daily. He didn't even balk when he had to use hand soap in place of his shampoo, and use the one good arm, he was grateful at this point to be able to shower, period.

The energy level went from half full to well below empty, and it was all he could do to dress in clean pajama's, Alexis knew he wouldn't sleep in hospital gowns, and had packed him two pair, and make his way to the wheelchair. His cast only allowed him to button the shirt halfway, but it was still better than the show me gowns as he called the hospital furnished gowns.

He was back in bed and exhausted, he fell asleep for the first time without tubes extruding from him and without a trach breathing for him when his oxygen level dropped too low. He was being monitored closely, by camera, and instrumentation but he needed to sleep, natural sleep to heal.

Xx

During this time, a team of doctors had quickly summoned the Castle family together to discuss the next steps and to explain what to expect in the next coming days. The first thing they mentioned was energy level, Rick would tire easily when he did they were to encourage him to take naps, sleep actually helps cure the body, or allows the body to heal from the type of trauma he had gone through.

Next, he will insist to shower, IN NO CIRCUMSTANCE is he allowed to be in the shower alone, the therapists are trained and are standing by to assist, for at least the first week or so. That would need to be decided who would assist him once they returned to New York since it would be at least 4 more weeks before they could even consider removing the casts.

Everyone's eyes turned to Gina until Alexis finally spoke up,

"Mom, would you take that on? I mean it would be less embarrassing for Dad for you to help than if it were Grams or me?" It's not like you haven't seen him naked before, hell you were married for almost 7 years" Alexis made her case

Gina blushed, probably because she was in front of her ex-mother-in-law and or Kate, but answered," Of course I will sweetie, and he knows better than to argue with me when I put my foot down. He scared the hell out of us all, and he has to play by the rules now so we can get him better to beat the hell out of him" she smiled,

"Speaking of that, I want to go over some major do's and don'ts when you get home for Mr. Castle's memory treatment. I want to be sure your good intentions don't do more harm than good." Doctor Acker, a specialist in brain trauma, and its associated side effects said without the warm feeling that they were accustomed to with, Dr. Jardine.

"I've examined Mr. Castle, and reviewed his test results with Doctor Jardine, and we have agreed that the trauma has caused a loss of memory, or commonly referred to as amnesia. Loss of memory of events prior to injury is called retrograde amnesia, while the loss of memory following the injury is called anterograde amnesia.

"Mr. Castle, in my opinion, is suffering from a seldom diagnosed type, which I refer to as "Swiss Cheese" amnesia, meaning you can recall parts of the event, yet are unable to completely recall all the events, even with lots of help and cues.

"His ability to recall, even briefly his daughter, mother and as he put it his wife, but could not recall the Detective who, as I understand it he spent almost two years working with daily leads me to believe that this is a better description of his illness. It doesn't mean that he remembers everything exactly the way it happened up to his injury, even with you Gina, he apparently wasn't aware you were divorced or why." Doctor Acker said

"Well, we still work together as well Doctor, I am his publisher, and well, he never shut me out of our Daughter's life, so I've been very involved with his life as well, I guess by proxy," Gina explained,

"So, Alexis is yours and Mr. Castle's daughter from your marriage?" Doctor Acker asked,

"No, I don't claim the woman who gave birth to me almost 18 years ago, Gina married my Dad when I was about 7 years old and became my MOM, not my mother. She's been there for me ever since, even though she and Dad divorced. I still saw her regularly, and she and my Dad have a very loving relationship, in fact, he's said he loves Mom, but not enough to be married to her.

"You're the doctor, I have no freaking clue what that means, if you saw the two of them together you would swear, they were in love. Mom stayed with me when Dad took on this project, she actually moved into Dad's loft with his blessing so she would be near me, in case I needed her." Alexis had moved to sit between Gina's legs as her Mom stroked her hair gently to calm her.

Doctor Acker looked puzzled, so Gina added, "Look, Doctor, we had a very friendly divorce, it's no secret that I'm still in love with him, he knows it, hell everyone knows it. He didn't divorce me over another woman, or even me with another man, that's our business but just know that he does love me, he's just not in love with me. There is NOTHING I wouldn't do to get him healthy again, nothing, so please continue."

"I understand, and I admire you both, my ex-spouse was and is not as gracious as you two seem to be. That leaves the question to you, Detective, how do you fit into Mr. Castle's life, and what role do you play?" The doctor looked directly at Kate, who was now squirming and turning a bright red.

"It's a long story, but Castle, I mean Rick came to help when one of our cases involved someone who was copying murder scenes from his books, and well it evolved from there. He worked with NYPD as a Civilian Consultant until May of last year, when he left for this project." Kate tried to keep it as professional as possible,

"Well, thank you for the official Police report Detective, now what are YOU, Kate doing here? Are you and Mr. Castle involved in a romantic relationship?" Doctor Acker pressed,

"No, we're not, I mean yes I love him, Gina knows that now, but Castle, I mean I never told Rick to his face, he left the NYPD to get me out of his mind. I know he had feelings for me and I mistreated him, that's about as detailed as I'm going to get Doctor unless you can tell me a clinical reason why you need to know more details", she had regained her Detective mode.

"No, I just found it odd that Mr. Castle recognized everyone in the room, EXCEPT you, and your explanation cleared that up. It also supports the Swiss Cheese typology of amnesia, Mr. Castle has apparently blocked you out of is thoughts, thus the brainwaves, measured by the EEG, don't recognize you or any memories of his time with you.

"We do have a treatment; Neurofeedback is a technology-based learning technique that provides real-time information about his EEG, electroencephalogram activity. Through this type of brain training, Mr. Castle can alter his own brainwave characteristics by challenging the brain to learn to reorganize and by conditioning the brain to function better, even recalling places or events that the brain has successfully blocked from recall.

"It's not a rapid treatment, and usually takes multiple sessions with a trained specialist, as well as Mr. Castle, being willing to go back to that period of his life and attempt to recall the memories. Typically, when patients have been successful in their attempts to forget an event or trauma, it is often better left in the past, since only Mr. Castle knows the impetus that caused him to shut down that part of his life."

"Doctor how does this treatment work, and is there any pain for Rick, I mean he's been through enough of that with this God Damn ordeal, I won't allow him to go through anymore, so please explain" Gina was back in charge, Rick was her love and she would be damned if he would suffer to regain something he had gone through hell to forget.

"Well, simply put Gina, The EEG Biofeedback technique is a process in which subtle brainwave information is amplified and shown back to Mr. Castle in the form of a computer game. The object of the training is to re-educate the brain to make voluntary changes via computerized graphic displays and auditory signals that encourage a change in mental state.

"This would challenge the brain to function more effectively, including recalling of repressed memories, WITH of course Mr. Castle's approval. Someone is going to need to explain to him, in non-clinical terms WHY he has chosen to forget Detective Beckett, as well as everyone he worked with at the 12th precinct. He would be given the opportunity to suspend treatment at any time, BUT once he recalls something, we can't reverse the process, so it is a very serious decision to make.

"Let us discuss among ourselves, Katherine we are going to need some honest answers, and then decide as a family what we think should be done, then present it to Richard, "Martha spoke up as the mother,

"Well, one thing I would remind you is that this is a relatively new form of treatment, BUT we have seen progress in several fields with some variation of this treatment. The brain's ability to change, heal and become regulated again is extremely effective in terms of concussion, memory problems, sleep problems, ADHD and PTSD, where the cause is often related to dysregulation of a system, rather than injury to a specific location of the brain.

"We still aren't certain which category Mr. Castle falls in, did the injury cause the amnesia, or did the brain teach itself to disassociate the brainwaves associated with this period of time, thus blocking any memories? I really don't think anyone of us can answer that question so we need to consider that when we present treatment options to Mr. Castle." Doctor Acker had relaxed a bit in his tone and speech,

"Again, Doctor we need to discuss this as a family and reach an agreement before we present this to my son," Martha, said leaving no room for discussion at the present time.

"Doctor, you talked about the clinical treatment, what can we do, as those who love Rick, do to help him, I mean I'm sure none of us want to hinder his progress in healing," Kate asked, speaking up for one of the few times,

"Good question Kate, in general use these guidelines;

"Be flexible, patient, and help Rick try to remember what he can, provide hints not the answer it will stimulate the brain activity. Find ways to make it easier for him to remember new information. For instance, keep new information simple and repeat it often. Break down new activities into small steps.

"Provide verbal cues rather than ask questions. For example, say: "This is Jane, your cousin, who has come to see you." Don't say: "This is Jane. Do you remember who she is? Questions will frustrate Mr. Castle, especially if he doesn't have a clue to what or who you are talking about.

"Establish a regular routine. This will help him feel more secure and make it easier for him to remember what usually happens during the day. Too much variety and stimulation can be confusing.

"Sometimes patients respond better when the family writes down important pieces of information, almost like the refrigerator magnet grocery list, provides a sense of normalcy to them.

"Finally, and I can't overemphasize this enough, you all must learn what to expect. You all will become frustrated at times, think about how frustrated Mr. Castle is, so if you understand WHY a behavior is done, managing your irritation will be easier if you remember Rick can't remember how to do a task, because of his condition. It's not because he doesn't want to be helpful." Doctor Acker had softened his tone and demeanor,

"Look, this is daunting, and won't be easy on anyone, but here's my card if you need me, I happen to live in New York which is why I was called in to consult on this case." As he handed Gina his card. "Any more questions I can answer now? If not contact me when Mr. Castle has returned to New York and what treatment options have been decided on" he said then quietly made his way out of the conference room.

Gina stepped to the phone and called the nurses station, Rick was still asleep and resting comfortably, so they could continue without worrying about if he was OK.

"OK, Rick is sleeping soundly, the nurse said it was probably the first good deep sleep he had gotten in weeks, so not to expect him to wake up soon," Gina said,

"Mom, are they sure he is OK? I mean, I don't want to think he's asleep when he went back into the coma" Alexis said with tears in her eyes,

"I asked the nurse to describe the noise she was hearing, she said his nose flared as he breathed out, just the faintest of a light snore, and his lips wrinkled," Gina smiled as Alexis hugged her,

"That means he's having a good dream Mom, thanks for checking on him," Alexis said with tears in her eyes.

"Of Course, baby, I love him, you know that we all love him," Gina added as she saw Kate cringe.

"OK, I think we all know what we need to discuss, and I'm just going to say I'm sorry Kate, but nothing, is going to stop or slow down Rick's healing. If these questions seem personal, well, sorry, but it took a lot to call you to come here, please understand that we all want the best for Rick.

"You have to promise to be truthful, I mean 100% truthful no subtext or innuendo as Rick complained so much about your conversations." Gina laid it out there, as Kate turned even brighter red,

"I understand Gina, again, Thanks for letting me be here and close to him. I know I created a lot of mistrust and hurt, but I want to make up for that if I can,"

"Well, I guess the first question is when did you know you love Rick, and why didn't you tell or at least show him some sign that he was more than the pain in the ass, I think he described your title for him?"

"I'm being truthful, I know some will doubt that, but I started having feelings for Rick by our second case, then when we worked the little girl kidnapping case, I knew it. Why? I was an ASS, plain and simple, I haven't loved anyone before in my life, it's been full of getting justice for my Mom, that I stopped living my life. I wouldn't allow anything to stop me on her quest, which is why I acted as I did. I thought I would solve the case and Rick would be there for me, stupid I know." Kate answered,

"Well, how do you feel about telling Rick the highlights of why he left, and if he wants to remember or not? Don't think for a minute I won't be with you, but I want Rick to make this decision" Gina replied, no angry, but forceful enough to let everyone know she meant business.

"I understand, I agree, I'll even draft out what I want to say to let you all review it before if that's the best way. I just want Rick to get well, come back to New York, and maybe, just maybe in time I will get a chance to start as friends, then we'll have to see. Gina, I'm sorry, I know you love him, but I won't go behind your back, I love him as well, and if I have to change, then change I will so as to have a chance with him,"

"Fair enough Katherine, draft the response, we'll meet again to review before we talk to Richard about it," Martha said, ending the discussion,

"I think we better get something to eat while Dad's still asleep, then we can visit him and keep him company in our regular shifts if that's OK?" Alexis asked,

"Sounds Great" Gina replied as they were up and headed to the cafeteria,

TBC

A/N Once again a lot of medical jargon thrown in, forgive any errors, it's not important and not meant to be a Medical Journal entry, so please excuse and enjoy the story. Thanks, Tim