Slow, pattering rain hit the surface of the mountain lake. On an island in the middle we sat. Against a tree on either side, staring at our reflections.
"That's a shame." He said.
I skipped another rock. "It is what it is," I said. "Either way, he was happy to be away from me, so I don't dwell on it. He's happier now."
"That's how it was with her. I know we're better off not talking to each other. Doesn't mean I'm sad we don't," he skips a rock, "but it also doesn't mean I'm not thankful to not have to deal with her."
"..."
"You know what I mean?"
"Uh-huh."
Sam turned his head to the left. I made eye contact, and he looked up. In the time since the band's jam session, we'd gotten friendlier. He talked about his Dad a lot. I could tell he was proud of his Dad, but it certainly also bothered him, considering he wasn't there for much of teenage years. I told him I could relate, knowing my relationship with my Dad wasn't pristine either. Sam's issues with his father didn't help on top of his problems with Abigail. He had a lot to complain about, and he wasn't entirely emotionally stable. I was happy to be there for him, even if it felt like I wasn't doing much, just being someone for him to vent to. The rain continued.
"It wasn't even my fault."
"Of course."
"She acted like it was, naturally. After everything I did for her, I was there for her, I sacrificed for her, after everything, she was still ungrateful. Do you know what its like, giving up so much for someone, and still being underappreciated?" He threw a rock.
"Yeah." The rain looked like it was letting up.
"That's what it was like with my Dad. You know, when he could even bother to be around. He blamed me for everything. Always my fault. I don't know why. Then they had Vincent and my Dad had to go. Vincent barely knew him. Poor kid, he looks up to me so much, it's a lot of pressure. But I'm not my dad, I don't know what to say to him. I hate blaming my Dad, but it's kind of his fault. Well, not fault, but it's because of him that Vincent's growing up with only me to look up to as a father figure. I don't wanna call him lazy, he's fighting for us, but it still hurts." Another head turn.
"You know what I mean?"
I looked at Sam and smiled, turned back and threw a rock. "Of course."
He skipped another rock. The ripples it made were indistinguishable from those made by the rain.
"Have you tried hitting the rock with your pickaxe?" said Alex.
"Oh, what was I thinking? You break rocks with pickaxes! What a fool I was! Here, as a reward for your bright idea I'll allow you to break it," I said, holding my pickaxe out to Alex. Not sensing my sarcasm, he took it, preparing to defeat the purple rock which had so plagued my farm.
"Thank you. Now for the r-" He hit the rock once and was, of course, thrown back.
"Oh, dear! I never saw it coming! Are you okay?" I said, pretending to care.
"Rude. What's up with this thing?"
"It was here when I got here. It's the last thing I have to get rid of before I have the whole farm cleaned up, and it's kind of getting on my nerves. Really throws off the mojo of my farm. You know?"
"I feel you. So why'd you bring me here?"
"First off, cause I knew I could trick you into hitting it. That was funny," Alex shot me a glare. I smiled back. "But second, I wanted to see if you could find anyway to get rid of it."
"Huh. Well, I know you don't expect me to use my brain to think of something. So," Alex took his shirt off, "I'll use my other tactic." Alex flashed a wide grin and flexed.
"Ha, oh, haha, okay." I couldn't help blushing. What? Alex was ripped, sometimes I can't control myself. To avoid embarrassment, I turned around and started to walk. "I'll leave you to it, then."
"I defy you, rock!" All I heard was grunts, footsteps, and fist hitting sediment as I walked away. Alex was interesting. He came off as a brute of sorts, and was certainly intimidating until I got to know him better. As he's opened up, I know he's just a big softie, but that doesn't mean he doesn't still scare me a little. Oh well, of the two people I had actually managed to become friends with in this town, I wasn't even on great terms with Alex. Sure, we'd talk, but I had been the only one who had made an actual effort to get us to hang out. Oh, well. I'd figured I'd need to take initiative when it came to meeting new people, but it's just sooo much effort. Sam, on the other hand, was always willing to hang out. In fact, sometimes he would call me to hang out or even just to talk. Speaking of, I got a call from Sam just then. I picked up.
"What's up, Sam?"
"Come to my house."
"Uh, okay...something important?"
"No. I just wanna hang out."
"Oh!" I smiled, thankful he couldn't see me blushing. "Right now?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. See you soon!"
"Yep." Sam hung up. As much as he always wanted to see me, I didn't always sense that. He never sounded excited to see me, even if I had plenty of enthusiasm. He certainly wants to see me, otherwise why would we? Maybe it's something else. Maybe he feels obligated to hang out with me? Maybe he feels bad? No! No. I'm thinking about this way too much. Sam's always apathetic, that's just his style. And I can appreciate that. While I was thinking I had been walking toward Sam's house. I had started taking the long way through Cindersap Forest for hear of actual human interaction. This gave me time to think, along with the scenery being quite beautiful.
"About time!" I heard Sam's voice. Naturally, this was sarcasm.
"There you are. What are you doing outside on your own? So unlike you." I chimed back, happy to see that he had come to meet me. Funny, he had noticed I started taking this route to his house.
"Be quiet." We started walking through the forest.
"Tell me, what's on your mind?"
"Sebastian's been annoying lately."
"Oh?"
"Well, he keeps getting on my case for the thing with Abigail. He tells me I need to make things up and that he wishes things could go back to the way they were. But I know any effort I make to communicate with her will be wasted."
"How so?"
"Anything I say, she'll take it as an attack on her person. She won't let me get away with saying anything which may victimize myself, especially if I confront her."
"Have you explained that to Sebastian?"
"Yeah, kinda...most of the time he doesn't like to talk about that kind of stuff anyways, so when we do its mostly limited to him complaining and that being the extent of our conversation."
"Sounds like you're going to need to be the one to take initiative if anything will get better. Granted, you could say nothing, but then things will never get any better."
"Yeah, you're right. But it's so difficult to talk to either of them. They're both so stubborn in their own regards and discussing this kind of emotional thing has never been easy with either of them. I told both of them I wanted things to stay the same after Abby, sorry, Abigail and I broke up, so I blame them for what's happened. It's ridiculous that it should be up to me to fix things."
"Sometimes you just have to be the bigger man. I know you can handle it, and even so, don't worry, I'll help you out. If you ever want me to come along or something, I don't know...just know you're not the only one on your side."
"..."
"If that makes sense..."
"Yeah..."
It was getting darker out. We walked along the river, the sunset giving enough light to show our reflections. The calm, flowing water was enough to keep us entertained, so Sam and I took some time to admire it. The water reminded me of my old home. The city I worked in was, like most, built along a river, but the pollution of the factories and industries there had sullied the pure water to the point where you could not even compare it to this river. Like where water comes together with other water, in its essence the water was the same, but its implications and symbolization for me now made the waters different. Sam lied down on his stomach, peering over the river bank. I squatted beside him.
"You've lived here your whole life, right?"
"Sure have."
"Does much change?"
"Funny you should ask. My life has been anything but static. Even if the town is small, the relationships I've built with the few people I've met are always changing, you know that. It's like I'm always meeting new people, though in reality the people are just changing. As for the valley and town itself however, not really. The mayor's always been the mayor. People are doing the same work. Someone new moves in every once in a while. This river, has always been here. It's never the same water, and it never flows in quite the same way, but it's still the same river. I think that represents a lot of what Stardew Valley is about. Even if our lives are dynamic, it's all mostly routine..."
"How very poetic." I mocked.
"Shut up." Sam smiled.
"Well, I hope we can stay friends." I looked at him and smiled. To my surprise, he turned away, and stopped smiling.
"Oh...Yeah, me, too." Sam returned some enthusiasm, but I could tell something bothered him.
"Something wrong with that?"
"No! I mean, why would there be."
"Mm." I stood up and Sam did the same. The sunset had passed and now the forest turned dark. The only light came from a few lamps placed around and the light reflected by the water. We started walking again. Why would Sam act like that? Maybe he really doesn't like me. Maybe I was right to think he feels obligated to hang out with me. Or maybe...I don't wanna get my hopes up, but wouldn't that be something? If Sam felt the same way. Oh, well, I don't wanna make things weird. I certainly won't bring it up, I'll pretend like nothing happened.
We were walking toward the lake on the other side of the forest and Sam kicked a rock. It rolled to a stop in front of me, so I kicked. Due to my utter lack of coordination, the rock hardly moved. Sam laughed and I blushed. He helped me out and kicked a bit further. A little too far, cause the rock fell in the lake.
"C'mon." I said. Sam was slowing up. I walked out on the dock which extended into the center of the lake. The dim light complemented Sam, in his tattered blue jacket, he really looked great. Man, his hair never stopped impressing me. I stopped my staring and sat down on the edge of the dock as Sam walked over. He took a seat next to me.
"What's Sam short for?"
"Samson."
"Hm..."
"My dad came up with it. Don't know why."
"Cute."
"Sure." Sam blushed a little. I wish I knew what he was thinking. Is this going where I think it's going? A firefly flew over and landed on the back of Sam's hand. He raised it up to examine it.
"Hey little fella',"
"Don't patronize him," I said.
"Oh, my bad. I didn't mean to hurt its feelings,"
"You're ridiculous."
"Hm."
"..."
"Do you ever feel, (m/n), like, so motivated when you start something, but you're too scared to commit to it and you know you won't be able to follow through so you just don't start it in the first place?"
"Sure."
"Well, how do you get past that?"
"Usually I think about why I want to do what I'm doing and keep that in mind. If my inaction will affect other people, well, then I should probably do it. It's also important to keep the end goal in mind."
"Oh." Tears were forming in Sam's eyes.
"Why do you ask? Something up?" I tried to play it cool.
"Because," Sam inhaled, "I don't know if I'm gonna be able to commit to this..."
"...To what?" And at this Sam grabbed the side of my face, and turned it so we faced each other. His eyes ached with concern, and I stared back, knowing all too well what he meant. I understood, and took Sam's face in my own hands. I closed my eyes and quickly put my head forward, pressing my lips to Sam's. He exhaled, letting out a little sob, and kissed me back. I can't believe this. This isn't real. I didn't even know Sam was...I couldn't see...what was going to...
My mind was racing, but all my focus was on Sam. He pulled back first, and looked up at me. His eyes still showed worry, but they danced with excitement, I could tell. His mouth curled upwards and he giggled a bit sadly. I chuckled back. Soon we were both laughing, and I pulled him into a hug. I grasped his face and kissed him again, this time with more fervor. We sat, laughed, and kissed. I pulled back this time.
I smiled.
"What now?"
"Well, usually I wake up now."
Sam chuckled.
"I'm glad..." Sam said.
"If ever you can't commit to me, I'll take full responsibility."
"You shouldn't say that. I, I...
"What?"
"I think...I love you, (m/n)."
"Huh."
"Well...?"
"Well?"
"C'mon! Say it back!"
"Oh, yeah. I love you, too, Sam."
Sam smiled at me with his entire body.