It's not much, but I wanted to wrap this up and leave it on a slightly more positive note.
Chapter 2: The Thousand and First
For me it was the thousandth and first time; for you, only the first and—I hope—the only. I finally succeeded in protecting you, and everyone else while I was at it. I saved your life as Strange saved mine five years ago. And God I hope you don't view my sacrifice in the same way I viewed his, as an event that only served to heap a guilt the size of the universe onto my trembling shoulders. I didn't think I deserved to be saved, but now I understand it was for a purpose. Strange saved me so that I could save everyone. So that I could save you. And kid, you deserve to be saved more than anyone.
I never got to tell you that you're the only reason I agreed to help with this mission in the first place. There's a lot that I never got to tell you, but I know Pepper will ensure that you know at least everything that she knows about us. There is some that I never told even her, things that were for your ears only. What I wouldn't give to say them to you now, during this thousand and first time I'm watching you die.
This time is the opposite of the first. I'm seeing what you saw those thousand other times, and I'm learning that it's not any easier on this side of things. Instead of watching you torn apart, I'm watching you barely hold yourself together. I want to take this grief away from you; I've carried it a thousand times, what's one more? But it's not a load I can simply lift from your shoulders. I can only leave you now and hope that you bear it with more grace than I did.
I don't know if I believe in Heaven, but if there's any way that I can watch over you after I go you'd better believe I will be glued to that screen for all eternity. Because I watched you die not just the once but a thousand times, and I will know no greater satisfaction than finally watching you live.