They laid there, with a smile on their faces for the previous laughter. The grass was a little cold and wet due to the light fog of the night. The music was slowly fading into another song as they were there just enjoying silence
"I've always loved watching the stars" said Emily catching a breath
"You do?" he asked perplexed
"Yeah" she answered relaxing
"Didn't take you for a romantic kind of person Byrne" he chuckled
" 'S not romantic! It's relaxing" she got herself into a sitting position
"Yeah, whatever" Cal smiled
"What? Why are you laughing? I just like watching the stars, is that a big deal?" she arched her eyebrow trying to sound angry
"Not a big deal at all you know, I like it too. I used to look at them a lot when I was on call" he answered
She tilted her had, listening to him, she'd like to know more about him
"Obviously I had different company. Don't get me wrong, my teammates were great but you know, I just prefer watching the stars with a wonderful woman" he said
She felt heat rise her cheeks, she blamed the beers they had just shared because there was no way she was blushing for such a simple compliment, what was she? 15? Thank God he was looking at the sky and not at her
"Cat got your tongue?" he asked turning his head to look at her
"I- no, just... you know, thinking" she sat down next to him, who raised form his laid position to sit next to her
"About?" the question left his mouth without even thinking
She lowered her head touching her knees with her forehead
"I'm sorry I didn't want to push you, you don't have to tell me" he apologized
"No it's ok. I'm just tryna process everything that happened in those day. This case is exhausting, Nick coming back and asking for a second chance and you know... Tommy" she explained
She felt a comforting hand on her shoulder
"I'm sorry about Tommy, was it serious between you two?" he asked
"How do you even know we were together?" she looked at him
"Just the way you talk about him and act every time someone mention his name" he run his thumb on her shoulder
"No, it wasn't serious. I kinda think it was for him but you know, I don't know if I will ever be able to have a serious relationship with someone anymore" she breathed out returning her forehead on her knees
"You said Nick wanted a second chance" he tried to confort her the best, trying to let her understand that there might be some good parts in all of this
"Nick and I are done. I loved him, of course I did. But he made his decision once I was back and now just cause Alice cheated on him he wants me back. We said goodbye time ago, just some days after I came back from my kidnapping. I don't wanna be a second choice Cal, I'm not even sure someone will still want me... Tom did, he was the only one... but he wasn't what I wanted... I'm a mess" she felt tears on her eyes sliding down her face
"Byrne" he called her, slowly shaking her shoulder, she didn't answer
"Emily look at me please" he said softly
She raised her head looking at him, he had already seen her cry before, no point on hiding from him
"Look, I know it's hard, I know you feel bad now, I can understand it. But like I said before you're an amazing woman, an incredible mum and a fantastic agent" he begun, making her smile bitterly
"A mum who wasn't there for six years and an agent who just got back to work after a long time" she said sadly
"You're doing your best, and for now, you're succeeding it. I'm serious Emily, you're amazing, you're not someone's second choice, you should always be the first one" he smiled at her, drying her tears with his thumb
"Nobody normal would want me" she said, remembering her conversation with Tommy
"How could someone not want you? You're amazing, intelligent, witty and beautiful. You may have some shadows but just a stupid man would let that be a problem and not try to find out what an extraordinary woman he has in front of him" he looked into her eyes but she lowered them immediately
"I know you've seen me go through some pretty bad panic attacks... but they are a bit stronger sometimes, and more frequents and... oh God I almost killed him" she started sobbing and breathing heavily
"Who Emily? I'm sorry but I don't think I'm following what you're trying to tell me" he put a hand on her back, rubbing it gently, trying to calm her down
"Tommy... I- We were... He found out I take some sort of drug to remember what happened to me, he got mad and I got mad, telling him to leave. He didn't, I had a panic attack and he came closer, touching my arms and I hit him. We fight, like literally, we broke a shelter and I almost chocked him... he left after that" she explained between sobs
He shifted himself nearer and moved her body closer to his, making her settle her head in the crook of his neck, hugging her
"You told him to leave Emily, he should have listened" he said stroking her hair
He felt her hand shift from her leg to his beard, stroking it lightly
"I know but-" he interrupted her
"No buts, you're trying your best. If he really didn't want to leave he should have tried to calm you down in another way, like I did the other day. I don't know if the panic attack you had was classified as bad but I stayed. I tried to touch you and you let me, but if in that moment you had told me to step away I would have tried to calm you down from distance, you know that place had a nice view, I would have waited for you even for hours" he laughed, trying to cheer her up
He felt her smile in the crook of his neck, snuggling closer and continuing stroking his beard. She closed her eyes, hearing the music in the background. She felt safe.
She breathed him in, smelling his cologne, calming herself down. He was right, every time she had ptsd or a panic attack with him he always tried to make her feel better. He drove her away as soon as possible from that crowd of press, he saved her from drawing and almost drawn himself because she was trying to push him down and he was there when she discovered that they were analyzing Flynn. He was there and he was so sweet.
"You like my beard uh?" he smiled
She opened her eyes, removing her hand from his face and separated herself from his embrace. She felt her heart pump into her chest and she lowered her eyes
"I- I'm sorry, I didn't even realized it" she said toying with her own fingers
"No don't get me wrong, I like it" he said pushing her back into his embrace
He felt her freeze, and he could hear her quick heartbeat against his chest
"You ok?" he asked, maybe he was pushing too much
"Never better" she answered chocking on her own words
He let out a chuckle rubbing his hand against her back. Their gaze went back to the sky, the fog was getting a bit thicker but they could still see the lights of the city.
"Hey look! A shooting star! Make a wish Byrne" he said pointing at the sky
She looked up at him
"I already did" she said smiling softly
He looked down at her, smiling. They stayed silence, looking in each other's eyes for a moment
"You're beautiful" he said, moving her hair from her face
She narrowed her eyes, shifting them from his own to look at his mouth
"I'm sorry I shouldn-" before he could finish the sentence he felt her lips on his own
He returned the kiss, slowly moving his lips on hers, she locked her arms around his neck as soon as she felt the tip of his tongue on her lower lip. He tilted his head to kiss her deeper, resting his hands on her hip and one on her thigh, letting her lay one leg on his own.
She shivered under his touch and she let out a long deep moan from the back of her throat as she pushed him closer to her body making him chuckle.
She step away catching a breath, blushing hardly and lowering her eyes.
"I'm sorry I-" she apologized unwrapping her arms from around his neck
"Don't be sorry, I want you to make it again, it was hot. Didn't take you for hot-make-out-sessions kind of person Byrne" he teased
She glanced up at him, arching her eyebrows. Before he could say anything else she got on her knees and with a quick move she sat on his legs, straddling him and resting her arms again around his neck, her face close to his own.
"Shut up Isaac" she breathed inches from his lips
"Yes ma'am" he put his hands back on her hips, pushing her closer and kissed her again under the stars.