Last chapter for now, dearies! I'm still working on more, so don't be too sad!
Thanks to GoddessxNyte2 for being the world's quickest and most thorough beta!
Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail, Desna owns the Pradesh Characters (who we will see more of soon).
Enjoy! And please review!
Lucy brightened at the greeting she'd received from her favorite Poison Dragon Slayer. Well, really, the only Poison Dragon Slayer, but who's counting? He was a good friend, one of the few who knew just how messed up her head was sometimes, and it had been almost a year since she'd heard from him or the rest of Crime Sorciere.
"Erik!," she squeaked, "Sugar-bear, how are you!?"
Erik just rolled his eye. He should have expected her to ignore his question in favor of jumping into her asinine small talk, she always did. She hated his 'rude non-greeting tendencies' and outright refused to converse until the pleasantries had been exchanged, the motions gone through. He'd told her endlessly that no one asks 'how are you' and actually wants the genuine answer, stating that he knew for a fact that they didn't, as he could clearly hear their lack of interest. So there was no point in asking or responding to it. To which she had simply responded, 'Well, I want to know,' which he… couldn't refute. She did want to know, he could hear that, too. And it was annoying.
So, this happened. Every time they spoke.
He'd jump into his own twisted version of a civil conversation (which was really more like an interrogation than anything). She'd completely ignore any important items on the day's agenda and initiate pointless small talk until she was satisfied, most of which Erik would refuse to respond to. He'd argue the pointlessness of it all and she'd refuse to respond to it.
And the vicious cycle would continue until they finally got around to a real discussion. It was exhausting.
One day, one of them would give in and they'd start a conversation like normal human beings. It was bound to happen eventually. Then again, they were probably the two most stubborn and ridiculous wizards in Ishgar. Well, probably in all of Earthland.
So it was also likely they'd be like this until the end of time, or until one of them kicked the proverbial bucket, whichever came first (and since the Infinity Clock thing, they'd all realized that the end of time happening wasn't quite as far-fetched as they'd been led to believe).
"Really with this shit? Again?"
"So, you're doing well? What about Meredy?"
"Bright Eyes, just shut the fuck up and answer my question. And Bubblegum is annoying as shit, as per usual."
Lucy smiled wider, "Sugar-Bear, I can't shut up and answer your question. Mutually exclusive actions, there, bub. How's Macbeth?"
"The narcoleptic is just as sleepy as ever. What the fuck is with you calling me Sugar-Bear? And please for the love of your fucking stars, answer my question before I melt this desk." Another grumpy noise of protest was heard from behind where Erik was propped up against Laxus' desk. It was ignored.
"Sugar is my favorite poison, and you're kind of like a big, prickly teddy-bear. Besides, I have Ophiuchus now, so I can't call you snake charmer anymore. So, is Sawyer still doing well? I heard he challenged Jet a couple weeks ago," she said conversationally, inspecting the nails of her free hand.
"Sugar doesn't kill you in one go, so it doesn't count, Tink. What's this fucking dark guild you're chasing, and why the fuck is your obnoxiously pink guildmark not sitting on your hand?"
"Hm," Lucy hummed, lowering her hand and looking back at the com, "Sorano? She's doing well?"
"Sorano is ready to kill you. In fact, she ditched the Criminally Insane Brady Bunch yesterday, when she heard a rumor about you taking her sister's precious keys. Nobody's seen her, but it was Macbeth's day to watch her, so I'm confident that it's not my problem. It is probably yours though. And for the last time, what the hell is going on? Damn it, I hate communication lacrima. I can't hear your soul and you're being particularly frustrating right now."
"How's Richard?"
"Orga! Where did you see that traitorous bimbo?"
Orga rolled his eyes. He was pissed about the whole thing, but Sting was always over the top. And he never listened to the words people spoke to him.
"Sting, I told you. I didn't see her. I saw her horse-man spirit….Stegosaurus?"
Yukino, despite really wanting to giggle at the name, kept an angry and upset expression on her face as she piped in, "Sagittarius?"
The lightning god slayer just shrugged, "Yeah, sure. I saw him outside Era on my way back from my last job. I lost track of him though and I can't ever figure out the scents of friggin' spirits so I couldn't follow. You think she's headed South?"
"Hm. Maybe. She and her team once had allies on Galuna Island, if I'm not mistaken. Maybe she's planning on heading through there on her way to Minstrel?" Rogue offered. He didn't know exactly where she was going, but Minstrel was not the best choice of a first stop for her, so he figured leading the search down that way would be a pretty safe way to ensure she wasn't caught. Hope you're out of Fiore, Lu. Things are going to get dicey here pretty quick…
Sting put a hand to his chin and turned his attention back to the large map they'd pasted onto the wall of the guild hall. He pinned a large cutout of a chibi-Scary Lucy (which he made himself and was immensely proud of) to the area just South of Era, "Right. We'll get her. Let's send a team to search."
The blonde walked to the bar and sat down heavily, ordering a beer. After a moment he called to Rufus, "and get Lamia Scale on the com! I want them on the lookout for that Boobs-For-Brains Blonde!"
Rogue and Yukino were certain of two things.
One, Sting was taking this as an opportunity to relentlessly and without mercy take revenge on their fair-haired kin for every prank she'd ever successfully completed on him (which was quite a few) and every nickname she'd bestowed upon him in the last few years of their friendship.
Two, Sting's vocabulary (or complete lack thereof) would forever and always prevent him from coming up with a decent insult.