Chapter Twelve – The Anonymous Informant

"Tevos to Shepard… Shepard? Are you there?"

Back in the privacy of their own room, Jules reluctantly eased Liara's mouth away from her own as Tevos' voice chimed over the comm. The comm panel was within arm's reach, or it would have been were Liara not straddling her to keep her in place on the sofa.

It had been two days since Adarna's coup and they had both finally been released from the medical room. In truth, they probably hadn't needed to stay there that long – even Rhys had admitted so – but Tevos had insisted. For some reason she had been keen that Director Damon didn't get the chance to speak to either of them and saying that they were still recovering was the best excuse she had.

Tevos hadn't been to see them either, according to Aria this was because she'd been engaged in some pretty intense negotiations with the HTA, they had claimed the headquarters was a crime scene and had wanted to clear everyone out of it and seal it off, leaving Tevos without anywhere to operate from.

Of course Aria believed this was just an excuse for the HTA to take the building off them and shut the project down. From the way she told it, Damon and Tevos had spent the past two days locked in a battle of wits that rivalled all other political disputes in the galaxy. Then again, Aria did have a flair for the dramatic.

Either way, Tevos had won in the end and she and all of the staff who hadn't been working for Adarna had been allowed to remain. Jules had been waiting for Tevos to contact her so she could finally get some answers, unfortunately the matriarch's timing left a lot to be desired. Although Jules had broken Liara's kiss, the asari's enthusiasm hadn't been dampened and her lips had moved instead to Jules' cheek, then down to her jaw and finally her neck. It was with some difficulty that Jules stretched an arm across the back of the sofa and hit the comm panel.

"Yes, I'm here."

"Director Damon has finally left the building, but he's returning in the morning to question you about the arms dealers."

"Right," Jules muttered distractedly as Liara threaded a hand through her hair.

"He wanted to do it tonight but I managed to put him off until tomorrow," Liara's tongue licked across her earlobe as her other hand tugged at her top to find the bare skin beneath, "I think there are things we need to discuss before then," Liara's lips returned to her neck and hot breath sent shivers through her spine, "I'm waiting in my office if it's convenient."

Jules closed her eyes as Liara's attentions became more urgent and sighed heavily, "I'll be right there."

The kissing abruptly stopped and she looked down to see Liara staring at her, blue eyes glittering in disbelief. As the call shut off Jules shrugged innocently, "What?"

"Couldn't you have told her to wait ten minutes?"

Jules smirked, "I think that in ten minutes it would be even harder to leave."

"Then stay," Liara's mouth found hers again but Jules pushed her back gently.

"Tevos is right, I need some answers from her."

"Now? This is the first time we've been alone in two days, and Rhys said we need to rest."

"I didn't realise rest was what you had in mind," Jules smiled coyly but only managed to earn a slight scowl in response as Liara sighed and slipped off her lap to sit beside her on the sofa, "Oh c'mon, Liara, you've got me for life, you can let Tevos have me for an hour or two."

Liara's expression was enough to show exactly what she thought of that but she didn't protest further, "What are you going to say to her?"

"Dunno, depends what kind of answers she manages to come up with," Jules groped around the floor for her shoes – the ones Liara had relieved her of moments earlier – and slipped them onto her feet, "it worries me that Adarna managed to plot all of this behind her back."

"Do you think Tevos was in on it?"

Jules paused halfway through tying her laces and shrugged, "Why would she be?"

"I don't know," Liara admitted, "I don't pretend to understand any of the real motives behind this project. We could still walk away if we wanted to, it's not too late."

Jules laughed at that, "You're telling me you could really walk away now? Before we get a chance to see where all this goes?"

Liara shrugged as though to appear indifferent but the small smile she quickly hid told Jules otherwise, "I think we're in too deep to back out now, Liara, and like Aria said: we've got nothing better to do."

…

It was impressive how quickly the devastation in the headquarters had been cleared, Jules mused as she made her way to Tevos' office. There was no sign of the bullet holes, blood stains or broken glass that had littered the corridors only two days before. All of the damaged furniture had been removed, leaving the rooms looking a little sparse as she passed them but aside from that there was almost no indication at all that there had been any fighting. Unless you counted the HTA officers who were still patrolling the corridors.

Jules passed several of them on her way to Tevos and she was acutely aware of them watching her. She noticed some of them activating their omni-tools as she walked by and heard them muttering urgently into the interfaces. She didn't know who they were reporting to or why but she could tell she was being closely observed.

When she reached Tevos' office she found two more of them standing guard outside the door, they made no attempt to stop her as she entered but she caught them both throwing her sideways glances.

To avoid standing there longer than necessary, she decided to enter without knocking and opened the door to find Tevos sitting at her desk, she beckoned Jules silently inside and once the door slid shut again, Jules raised an eyebrow.

"I see you've acquired some bodyguards."

"A generous gift from the HTA," Tevos agreed dryly, "for my own protection... apparently," she was sitting back elegantly in her chair, her legs crossed neatly beneath her long, figure-hugging dress. She was dressed in silver today, matching her silk-coloured eyes and, as usual, she wouldn't have looked out of place at a grand ball. Jules briefly wondered if – on her days off – she ever just flung on a pair of jeans and an old t-shirt like a normal person. It was hard to picture somehow.

Still, the thought amused her and she smirked slightly as she walked forwards into the room, "Aria says the HTA have been giving you a hard time."

She thought she saw a hint of irritation pass across Tevos' face but it quickly vanished and she merely nodded curtly, "They're understandably concerned about what happened here."

Jules frowned softly. She had always found Tevos difficult to read, politicians were like that. When you were on a battlefield fighting a hostile force it was usually pretty easy to work out who your enemy was but in politics things weren't that simple. Jules had always struggled to work out what is was that motivated Tevos, sometimes she appeared to be utterly selfish and uncompromising but then she would say or do something completely unexpected. It was hard to know what her real feelings about the HTA were.

"Where's Adarna?" Jules asked eventually.

"In an HTA detention centre, T'Carra too, and everyone else who was secretly working for her. Of course that means we've lost almost our entire security force but we're fairly certain we've rooted out all the traitors."

"You sure about that?" Jules challenged, "Adarna had been lying to you for years, how can we possibly know how deep those lies run, or who else was involved with her?"

Tevos must have picked up on the suspicion in her voice as the matriarch studied her carefully for a moment, "I realise that none of this reflects well on the project, in fact we probably look like incompetent fools. But you must know that I knew nothing about Adarna's plans."

"You expect that to reassure me? That your most trusted colleague was conspiring against you from the start and you knew nothing about it? What else is being plotted behind your back? How many more people are waiting to betray you? I am not stupid, Tevos, I know there's more riding on this mission than just you getting your home world back."

Tevos was silent for a time, staring at a spot in the far corner of the room. Jules waited her out with her armed crossed until the matriarch once again looked at her, "You're right," she spoke quietly, "my one and only intention from the start really was just to reclaim my world for my people, but Thessia has always been a politically important planet and that has… complicated things."

"Because of the eezo," Jules nodded, "is that what Adarna was after?"

"Perhaps, it's hard to know for sure. Maybe she really does just think that she would have been a better leader than me."

"Then she's proved herself wrong. As leaders go she seems to be on the wrong side of insane for my liking."

"I suppose I'll take that as a compliment?" Tevos smiled slightly but her face fell when Jules didn't reciprocate.

"Why did you ask me here?" Jules asked bluntly, she hated being talked in circles and more than anything she was trying to ignore the way her mind kept wandering to Liara, and to what they would be doing right now if Tevos hadn't interrupted them, "since it couldn't wait until the morning I'm assuming there's something you want to say before Director Damon speaks to me."

Tevos looked down at her desk, absently rearranging several of the items on it before she spoke, "I realise what happened to you was horrific. You were kidnapped from my building with help from my own staff, I would understand if you blamed me for what happened, at least in part. I need to know if you still support the project, if you still feel you can work with me."

"Why? Are you afraid I might go and work for the HTA instead?"

"Damon may try to hire you," she admitted, "your name alone would be a great asset to them. The story of your kidnapping has made the intergalactic news, the whole of the Milky Way knows about your return now and they are far more willing to believe it's really you. I've already had several interview requests from Rannoch, Surkesh and Tuchanka, you've got people fighting over you."

Jules fought not to roll her eyes, "The Athena Nebula is sounding more appealing by the second. I assume the intergalactic news doesn't reach them out there?"

Tevos smiled thinly, "Probably not. Although I honestly don't know what we're going to find when we get there. With so much uncertainty, this project is unlikely to succeed if we don't feel we can rely on each other."

"You're asking if I trust you?"

Tevos tilted her head affirmatively, "It's a reasonable question, I know you and I have a... difficult history, I'm hoping we can put it behind us."

Jules supressed the familiar prickle of anger those words ignited and practically chewed a hole in her lip to keep herself from blurting something out. She folded her arms tightly, digging her nails into the fabric of her sleeves as she distracted herself by looking towards the window. She had plenty of things to hate Tevos for: calling her a liar for believing in the reapers, abandoning Earth during the war, not to mention stirring up a lynch mob against her. Tevos had never once apologised or admitted she had been wrong about any of it and now Jules had to be the one to 'put it all behind them' or risk looking like a bitter old woman who couldn't let go. It made her stomach turn.

"Aria told me about what Adarna said," she found herself saying suddenly, "about you disobeying the matriarchs to give me the beacon," Tevos' face fell sharply and her cheeks flushed blue beneath her tiger-like markings before she cleared her throat and turned away. Jules watched the reaction in fascination.

"My God," she muttered, "you're ashamed of it, aren't you? The only decent thing you did during the war and you're ashamed. It bothers you more that you went against the matriarchs than that you nearly cost us the entire war."

"That's not fair, Shepard," she protested quietly, "I helped you as much as I could during the war, more than you realise. But I couldn't jeopardise my position on the council, if-"

"I don't want to hear it," Jules told her sharply. These were old arguments, unresolvable arguments that would have them talking in circles all night when all she really wanted to do was get back to Liara. She took a deep breath and considered her options. By now she honestly wanted to know what was going on in the Athena Nebula as much as everyone else did and Tevos was right, they wouldn't get very far if they couldn't trust each other. Still, she wasn't convinced that Tevos was telling her everything.

"If you want me to trust you," she said at last, "then there's something I need to know."

Tevos paused, eyeing her cautiously, "Go on."

"Who told you where the Normandy was? Grunt said you had an informant who gave you our exact location, I want to know who it was."

Tevos stared at her and for a moment Jules thought she would lie and claim it was anonymous, or deny its existence at all. But the matriarch surprised her.

"I'm not at liberty to say. I made a promise."

At least it wasn't a lie, Jules consoled herself. But not completely.

"Not good enough. If you want this to work then I need the truth. I can't think of a single person who knew where Liara and I were so someone must have been following us in secret. Was it someone you hired? An old enemy who still bears a grudge? Or just an acquaintance willing to sell me out for the money? Come on Tevos, if I'm going to be looking over my shoulder I at least want to know who I'm looking for."

Tevos frowned curiously, "Why do you assume the intent was malicious? Since you left the Normandy you have slept in a warm bed every night, enjoyed daily showers and lived in conditions that are practically luxurious compared to what you had before. You have been fed, clothed-"

"Drugged, kidnapped and sold to arms dealers willing to cut me open for a profit," Jules cut in dryly and though it shut Tevos up, the asari's eyes narrowed, "Who tipped you off?" Jules repeated, "I'm not leaving without an answer."

For a moment Tevos merely pursed her lips, "Would you ever have left the Normandy if Grunt hadn't found you," she asked suddenly, "or would you have waited until the ship could no longer sustain you? Would you even have bothered to try to survive or would you just have died when the Normandy finally ran out of power? I hear you fought tooth-and-nail to survive in that warehouse, an instinct you seemed to have been lacking over the past one hundred years, it seems that leaving the Normandy has been good for you."

"You're straying from the point," Jules snapped impatiently, her mind was still half on Liara and she really didn't want to draw this meeting out for longer than necessary, "answer my question! Who tipped you off?"

There was another pause and Tevos seemed to realise she had little choice but to answer her. Still, when she finally spoke, she chose her words carefully, "Someone who cares enough to want to save you from yourself."

"What the hell is that supposed to-" Jules broke off as the realisation suddenly hit her. She didn't need Tevos to elaborate any further, she already knew, "of course," she muttered softly, "who else could it have been?" she felt numb, cold like all the blood had drained from her and suddenly she had to steady herself against Tevos' desk.

"Are you alright?"

She looked up to see the matriarch watching her quietly, "Yes," she mumbled.

"You understand why I couldn't tell you?"

Jules nodded weakly, "Does anyone else know?"

"No. Like I said, I made a promise."

"Good."

"Shepard," Tevos pressed quietly, "can I count on your support now?"

Jules looked at her, only half aware of what she had been asked and unsure whether she even had an answer. Eventually she just frowned, "I'll see you in the morning, Tevos."

Tevos may have said goodnight but Jules wasn't really listening as she had already turned towards the door. She walked slowly back to her and Liara's room, barely even noticing the HTA officers this time as she mulled it all over in her head. It seemed so obvious now, she couldn't understand why it hadn't occurred to her before. Perhaps she had been too wrapped up in herself and her own feelings to notice what was in front of her.

When she entered their room, she found Liara sitting on the bed with her back to the door, gazing out across the city. Outside the sun was setting but the sight was obscured by thick storm clouds that were streaked across the sky, making the sea look black as ink. A distant rumble of thunder echoed across the city and heavy rain was thudding against the window.

Liara had left the lights off and the room was enveloped in shadow. She turned as Jules entered and smiled at first but her expression abruptly fell as she saw her, like she already knew what Jules was going to say.

"It was you, wasn't it?" Jules murmured softly, "You told Tevos where we were."

For a moment Liara said nothing, then she frowned and tilted her head away slightly, half-hiding it in shadow, "Are you angry?"

"No," she said and remarkably she found it was true, all of her earlier anger seemed to have disappeared, "if anything I'm impressed, I didn't think it was possible for us to keep secrets anymore."

She watched as the half of Liara's face that she could see crumpled as though in pain, "Jules, I-"

"Shh," Jules shut the door and walked forwards to sit on the bed next to her, so that their shoulders were touching, "it's alright, I understand why you did it."

Liara looked at her warily, "Do you?"

"Yes. You've been trying to persuade me to leave the Normandy for years," there was an awkward pause as Liara looked down at her hands. The soft sound of the rain filled the room and the lights of the city looked blurred and distorted through the rain-streaked window.

"Did Tevos contact you first?" she asked quietly after a while.

"Yes," Liara replied, "It was a few months ago, you were in engineering…" she paused, "talking to Tali," Jules closed her eyes briefly but let Liara continue, "Tevos said she wanted to speak to you but when she explained why I knew you would never agree. But if Grunt turned up with a ship and a squad, I thought you'd be more easily persuaded."

"So you told her where we were."

"Not at first. I needed to know more about the project before I agreed."

"Exactly how many times were you two in contact?"

Another pause, "Five."

Jules closed her eyes. She had known Liara had been hiding something during their melds recently, she had thought little of it. They both had things that didn't always feel like sharing, worries or idle daydreams or ideas they hadn't fully worked through yet. During true melds everything was laid bare but you knew instantly if there was something your partner would rather you didn't see. It would have been easy enough for either of them to break through those barriers at any point and see everything anyway but neither of them ever had. Trust and respect were the two things that stopped them, Jules certainly never thought they used it to lie to each other.

"Liara, if you were so desperate to get me off the Normandy and back to civilisation, why didn't you just talk to me?"

"What for? To tell you what you already knew? I know how stubborn you are, you didn't want to face losing the Normandy even if it meant staying there until it killed us both."

"Hey," Jules protested, "give me some credit, I'm the one who blew the Normandy up," Liara shot her a look and Jules sighed, "did you really think I cared about that hunk of metal so much I wouldn't have left it if you asked me to?"

"I did ask you to!" Liara exclaimed, "More than once, but this wasn't just about the Normandy, it was about you clinging onto the war like nothing has happened since then."

Jules stared at her incredulously, "What are you talking about?"

"You know what I'm talking about. I love you Jules," she stated bluntly, "but... I miss the old you sometimes, that day on the Citadel..." she paused and took a deep breath, "the day the war ended... it changed you."

Jules blinked at her, the sun had set fully now and she was little more than a silhouette in the dark. Another, louder rumble of thunder echoed above them, "Of course it changed me. I wiped out two entire species, the geth and the reapers are both gone because I decided to destroy them rather than risk trying to save them."

"You made the right decision," Liara said, though they had had this discussion so many times before, "the reapers were vile, keeping them alive in any form would have been abhorrent."

"But I was supposed to die with them!" she snapped, "But instead what did I get? Near immortality," she looked down at herself as though she could see the implants that were keeping her alive, "I committed mass genocide and it wasn't the first unethical choice I had to make to win the war. Why should I get to be the one to still be here two hundred years later? Why should I get to live a long and happy life when so many of the others are dead?"

Liara had her eyes closed and Jules could tell she was fighting back all of the usual arguments that came out at this point, "You have to let go of this, Jules," she almost pleaded, "this is why you had to leave the Normandy. I spent years watching you waste away on that damn ship because you refuse to move on!"

"Oh not you too," Jules snapped her teeth together in annoyance, "everyone wants me to move on, don't they? You, Aria, Tevos, you all seem to think it's so easy."

"Do you think I found it easy?" Liara challenged, "Moving on from Thessia?" Jules already knew the answer to that. In fact the shadow of Thessia still hung heavily over Liara, that was something she did see during their melds. It was never a single thought or feeling that she could pick from the rest but a general mood that coloured them all.

"I know you miss Thessia," she muttered after a while, "I understand why you would want to help Tevos reclaim it-"

"This was never about Thessia," Liara cut in sharply, "I think I would have agreed to reclaim the vorcha home world if I thought it would give you some kind of purpose again! Hiding from the galaxy wasn't working and I was afraid that if it went on much longer you might finally lose your grip on reality."

"You make it sound like I'm going crazy."

"Jules," Liara shot her a look, "you talk to dead people!"

They fell silent as they both looked away. It was an annoyingly fair point, Jules supposed, "So that's why you did this?" she asked quietly, "You thought Tevos' project might give me some kind of purpose and help me move on?"

"I wanted you to realise that there is always something worth living for if you're willing to try and embrace it. I didn't want to go behind your back but-"

"I'm too stubborn and unreasonable to have a conversation with?"

"Jules..." Liara wearily placed a hand to her forehead and Jules felt briefly guilty. She hadn't intended the remark to be chiding, she'd actually been trying to lighten the mood with a bit of dry humour but she seemed to have miscalculated. After a moment Liara visibly steeled herself and shifted on the bed to face her fully, "please, will you let me explain why I did this?"

Jules watched her soberly for a moment, her eyes were glittering through the shadows and her brow seemed to be creased in a painful frown, "I don't want to hear an explanation," she admitted at last but as Liara winced and began to turn away, Jules grabbed her hands and made her look back, "I want you to show me instead. Everything this time."