Everything in this chapter is can be found in chapters 1-12 of Ohjays story "Boredom". It is Cloud talking about his time as an infantry man while drunk, at the 10h annual AVALANCHE reunion, after Tifa asked cloud was he the victim of any pranks.
21. The time he had to kiss Zack's shoes when he was a new recruit.
I was kind of surprised I had to do this, so I questioned Zack ""Wait, so you're saying that it's REQUIRED to bow down before SOLDIERS before missions and kiss their shoes?"
Zack just looked at me and replied "Yep".
Back in the lifesteam, Angeal looked at Zack, "Zack, just how many recruits did you make do this? No wonder so many quit".
22. the time, he accepted Zack's dare and started stalking Sephiroth.
"I can't believe you actually did that, man. No-wonder you're all Emo". Reno said.
I replied "I still have nightmares over his daily routine".
Back in the lifestream.
Sephiroth admitted to Angeal "I decided to mess with him, so I did some unusual stuff".
"Err, what did you do?" Angeal asked.
"Trust me you do not want to know, all I can say is this, you know Lazards pet Chocobo, let's just say I paid it a visit, and made him think its name was Cloud"
23. The infamous Zack vs. Infantry paintball match.
I can't believe Zack got me first every time. Final round I was determined to last, but Zack still got me first.
Back in the lifestream,
"I remember that, he was just easy a target"
24. The time Zack trapped me in a bag for nearly 8 hours.
"Ya'know, when you asked me to help you with something this isn't what I had in mind" I told him.
"Oh like you have anything better to do" I still can't believe I didn't make something up.
I was just lucky the mail clerk forgot his MP3 player in the mailroom, and discovered me, else I'd have been trapped in that bag all weekend.
Back in the lifestream.
Aerith looked at Zack, "You left him, trapped in that bag?"
"What I left him a Chocobo chocolate bar to eat".
25. The time I was training in the training room and Zack came in.
Initially I was pleased to see him, as I thought I could get another sparing session with him, but he was too hyper having had too much coffee to train me, so he just chased me round the room for an hour shouting "Spikeyhowareyou! Speaktomespikey"
So when he eventually left, I thought I was safe. Until he came back in, literally an hour later, he returned this time he was on a sugar rush.
26. The time I saw Zack trying to hide against the wall.
I just knew there was something strange about that wall, so I approached, suddenly Zack jumped out at me shouting "CHOCOBO BOY!" I just screamed then ran back to the dorms to hide.
27. The time Zack talked me into cross dressing.
"Just how many times have you dressed as a girl, Cloud" Tifa and Yuffie asked at the same time.
I just groaned, why did I have to tell them this one "just the twice" Vincent and Cid just looked at me.
Back in the lifestream.
"Zack, what colour dress did you make him wear?"
"You saw it Aerith, remember that 'girl' you saw me with the one time in the slums"
"That was Cloud? I remember having a couple of guys wanting to know who 'she' was, they offered me loads of Gil for me to send them a copy the photos"
28. The time Zack sprayed me with silly string.
I was on my way to see Commander Jones so I was already feeling tense, when he just appeared out of no-where and sprayed me with silly string.
29. The time I had to steal Masamune
He said he'd upload the pictures of me cross-dressing onto facebook. "Wait" Tifa said grabbing her laptop, 5 minutes later she was in Zack's pranks album, "These photo's you mean?"
I went pale "Zack it's a good job you're dead as I'm going to kill you!"
Within an hour all of AVALANCHE had Clouds contact picture set to Cloud cross-dressing.
Back in the lifestream.
Zack and Aerith were laughing "Zack, you got to add him as a friend and tag him now he knows about them".
"I can't Aerith he doesn't have a facebook account"
30. the time Zack jumped onto my back, and shouted "Go Chocobo"
To be honest I was bored, so I just played along, and ran around making warking noises.
I did enjoy going through Ohjays story looking for these, and since her story is 35 chapters, the next chapter shouldn't be too long a wait.
Re. Number 22, if anyone wants to do a list of the things Sephiroth could have done while Cloud was stalking him. I would like to read it.
edit: made a couple of corrections.