Shout out to JBlaser, who requested this story as a prompt!
Mabel had never been to such a prestigious party, not in all her 15 years. She was just so excited. Pacifica made it all sound so… luxurious, and glamorous, and exciting, like every girl's fairytale.
She wants to enjoy fizzy, bubbly drinks, and mini finger sandwiches, and whatever other fancy-schmancy wonders they have to offer.
Above all though, Mabel was excited for the preparations. Finally, she and Pacifica would get some quality girl time.
She grins widely, at the foundation and glitter and makeup brushes spread out before her, and squeals.
"Makeover!" She exclaims, dragging a matching grin out of Pacifica, who sits attentively at her own vanity table.
"I'm gonna make you shine, girl" Mabel says, makeup brush already in hand.
Time passes in comfortable, mutual quiet. Mabel focuses on applying Pacifica's foundation, carefully dabbing, and brushing.
"So, what's this big bash commemorating again?
"It's nothing, really. Just some idiot, Bethunia. She's gross" She sticks her tongue out, with a gagging noise, adjusting the diamond necklace around her neck with a critical eye, "Daddy's making me go. The Benson's are business partners of his, so I'm obliged to be present"
She shrugs, with that offhand manner reminiscent of times past. Mabel deflates somewhat, her excitement having been dampened. Pacifica notices her friend's change in mood, spying her expression through her vanity mirror. She puts down the cotton round in her hands with a huff, and turns toward Mabel, taking her hands in hers with a reassuring grin.
Tonight was their night. Stupid apperances aside.
"But we'll still have fun together, okay? Even if Bet's a butt"
Mabel nods, grinning mischeviously.
"Of course. It's girls night. That means no boys, no troubles, and plenty of glitter"
"Mhmm. Now turn around, and I'll do your eyeshadow"
"Only if you let me do your nails with glitter polish-. How's bold cherry red?"
"Perfect"
They hadn't been back to Gravity Falls for a year. Finally being back was like coming home. Piedmont had none of the mystery, or the intrigue, all of which Dipper sorely missed. Grocery shopping with the parents had just become too mundane. Too normal.
When he spots the newest article blazen across the day's newspaper, lets just say, he'd been looking for it, for that mystery, that oddity, that needed looking into. His eyes widen, as he glances quickly over the headline, about the haunted tiara supposedly sitting within the confines of the Benson mansion.
The same mansion Mabel and Pacifica would be going to tonight. Yes, they were having a party. He'd had no interest in going, but now…
"Mabel! I need a dress"
"What? You cosplaying?"
"You can't go, bro-bro. Girls only"
"I need to get in there, Mabel" He shows her the newspaper article, hand shaking, "there's some crazy ghost making artifact there"
Mabel shrugs, "Kay"
Pacifica rolls her eyes. At this point, sheansd Mabel were doing each other's mascara, so the other teen scolds her lightly when she moves ever so slightly to do so. Pacifica huffs, but sits still.
"I'm still not sneaking you in" She tells Dipper firmly, "I like you, but not that much"
"Wait…" Mabel sends Pacifica a devious look, curling with amusement, "how much are you willing to cough up for our services? 15 bucks should be sufficient payment"
Pacifica considers that. A sly smile crosses her face, before she adds, "Each"
"Alright. Fine"
He's regretting his decision. In fact, Dipper is regretting every decision he's ever made to bring him to this point. Mabel has him sitting in front of Pacifica's vanity like a doll, hand clamped so tight on his shoulder he can't sit up straight.
He's experiencing the worst pain he's ever felt.
"Sit still" Mabel says.
He pushes her hands, which currently held a pair of tweezers, as far from him as is humanly possible. "You're pulling my face off!"
"Those eyebrows must be plucked," Is her vehement, boisterous reply.
Pacifica watches with amusement from the corner.
He glares at the purple dress, so glittery and flamboyant.
"I'm not wearing that"
"Yes you are" Pacifica answers him, without so much as looking up.
Dipper crosses his arms and scowls. "If I have to wear a dress, shouldn't I at least get to choose what it looks like?"
"Nope. We're the girls, Dip-Dip. We know what girls wear"
He huffs, but doesn't argue. There's honestly no point. Not once either of them got their mind set on something.
At some point, it becomes clear to Dipper this is just some excuse to torture him. An awful excuse, which he'd had the lack of sense to give to them.
He should have expected it. Mabel was bad by herself. Mabel and Pacifica tag teaming him was bound to be an unmitigated disaster.
Mabel holds up the nail polish with a grin, "Bold cherry red"
It's an offer. A statement. A commandment.
Dipper scowls at her.
"Why?"
Mabel just shrugs.
"It looks good on me, it'll look good on you" then she grabs his hand and starts to paint. The polish goes on smooth and slick and cold.
Dipper turns as far from her as he can and scowls at the bed.
Within a couple hours, Mabel and Pacifica have painted his nails, done his make up, put lipstick on him, curled his hair, and done his eyeshadow.
Halfway through, they even hand him a razor. He stares at it.
"What's this for?'
"You know, all the hair. You've got to shave, especially that baby mustache of yours"
He curses her under his breath. Maybe more than a couple times.
"I've been growing this stache for months Mabel" He points, at where a few scraggly hairs have begun to grow in, patchy and splotchy, but visible, at least. His pride and joy. "Months! I can't just cut it off now"
He'd have to wait another 4 months for it to grow back.
"Girls don't have moustaches" Pacifica points out.
"I'm not a GIRL"
"You are if you want in on this party"
Mabel nods. Perhaps in what is meant to be an encouraging way. It's really not. "Just think of it as a teenst weensy little sacrifice in the search of your grand doohickey artifact thingy"
By the end of the process, Dipper looks like the identical twin to his sister, long curly hair and all.
The dress they chose for him sparkles. It's a rich purple with glittering sequins, split at the shoulder, that rustles ever so faintly when he moves. A fluffy white boa is thrown around his neck, and he's clad in stuffy, shiny white fingerless gloves. He sports bright red heels, that match his bright red nails.
Glittering diamond earrings, a pearl necklace, and pale violet eyeshadow.
He looks like a diva. He feels like an idiot.
"Looking good there, Dip" Mabel exclaims, whooping and hollering like he's a model on a runway.
"Even I'm jealous" Pacifica remarks.
"Whatever. Let's just go"
No one questions them, when they all enter as a party of three. Dipper's particularly believable as a girl, apparently, voice cracks and all. He doesn't question the good fortune, and instead heads off to find the crown as soon as he's inside.
He spots the crown immediately. It's nestled atop a velvet cushion, sealed beneath a glass casing.
"What are you doing?"
"Uh nothing. Just, looking at the crown"
"Back up. If you wanna see it, ya gotta win it"
He thinks, what the heck does that mean? Then he shrugs. He'd just steal it.
Simple enough.
It's not simple. Nothing ever is, at least in Gravity Falls.
There's a complex system of tunnels, under the mansion. They're useless, but definitely there, for future reference, he supposed. He spends most of the evening traveling through them, through misty corridors, that end in dead end cul de sacs and moss covered cellars. Sometimes he finds a trapdoor, that opens into a random room, all around the mansion.
Never near the crown. Never anywhere close to where he needs to be.
He pops through another trapdoor and ends up on the stage, spotlight on him. Through some odd turn of events, he winds the beauty contest, though he had not entered.
He wins apple bobbing. Singing. Skeeball. He wins it all, but finds he's no closer to the crown.
Then they're call his name, Michelle, on the intercom. His brow furrows. He hesitantly clanked up to the stage. He wonders if the big, scary security guards to his left are about to announce him for the imposter he is.
They don't. No, apparently he's one something. Most decent, well rounded lady, or something along those lines.
His eyes widen, when he sees the crown, being handed to him. He takes it immediately, almost snatching it out of the man's hands.
It's… light… it… doesn't seem very magical… it's… plastic.
Mabel and Pacifica wave at him from the crowd. His sister is mouthing all kinds of phrases, such as way to go, and my bro, the pretty princess. The best princess.
He returns a tight lipped smile. Waves the Miss America wave, trying not to scream.
Nope, he just smiles, and puts the crown on his head.