Cracking my eyes open, I peak at the morning sun illuminating my bedroom. Confusion was replaced with pain from the headache I woke up from. Rubbing my eyes gently, I noticed the delicate skin was slightly raised and puffy. I could also feel the reminiscence of my mascara on my lashes.
I must have passed out immediately last night.
Stretching my arms high in the air, I yawned groggily before getting out of bed and heading to my vanity.
"Kami."
I flinched at the woman looking back at me. I was a wreck. My makeup was smeared with trails of mascara and rubbed eyeliner. My hair was a rat's nest with pieces sticking in and out of my fallen ponytail. I was still wearing my usual attire from last night and the button had popped off again, lost somewhere between the sheets of my bed.
I'm definitely not a seamstress.
What shocked me most was how swollen my face and eyes were. The entire sight of me was strange and I haven't seen myself like this since my late sensei's death. In those times, I felt I could fall onto the shoulders of my friends and family to help with the grieving. However, this pain I couldn't imagine sharing with anyone.
Although, I know Shikamaru was coming from a sane place. All his points did make sense if you looked at it from a non-argumentative perspective. However, the delivery of it all. That was a blow to the heart with a poison-soaked kunai. I didn't know if it was the things he said, or if it was because it was HIM. However, I knew that it wasn't worth constantly thinking about. Because I knew he didn't know everything and a part of me thinks he just speaking out of jealousy? I mean the situation between Gaara and I could be compared to the situation for him and Temari. He's just not a Kage like Gaara.
With another stretch, I stepped away from the mirror and my thoughts, and stared at my bedroom. I could hear the birds chirping outside and children's laughter on the streets below. Normally, I would enjoy the sound but my head was still slightly pounding. Glancing at the clock, it was nine a.m. Now, I'm not sure if the headache was from crying or sleeping in late.
Yawning once more, I began to make my bed and arrange my room. I gathered all waste into my trash bin, and picked up any misplaced articles of clothing and accessories. Once satisfied with my room, I tread my way towards the bathroom to start a shower and take care of my appearance.
Water, at a temperature resembling the hell I went through last night, cascaded down my body as I stood enjoying the sweet torture. I don't understand how yesterday went from a perfect evening with Gaara to the biggest fight I've ever had with Shikamaru. Nor do I understand why he did that? Was it because he knows Gaara and I had sex?
"Is he even serious enough about you? Do you think he would ask you to marry him?"
"Ugh," I scrubbed my hair roughly with the shampoo, lathering all the anger out. Is he serious?
"I won't hurt you... not again."
Squirting conditioner in my hands, I work it into my hair while staring at the shower curtain. I found myself zoning out as I began to recall last nights... encounter with Gaara.
Sand. There was sand everywhere. Sliding up and down my body towards my wrists and ankles, hardening into stone.
"You're too beautiful to cover yourself."
Pulling myself out of the memory, I began to wash off the conditioner.
I believe him. I really do. The Gaara I have seen this entire trip has shown me. The change in him is more than apparent. What's even more apparent is the change of his affection for me. It was like in the sand village, nothing mattered more than just our time together. I could tell he had feelings for me. He just doesn't want to admit it to me yet.
Turning off the water, I step out and began to towel dry my body then hair. I wrapped another towel around my body and searched for my blow dryer. To make things go by faster, I blow dried my bangs and my roots before putting my hair into my signature ponytail. After pinning my red clip in, I head back to my bedroom to figure out my outfit.
I stared at the clothing on my bed trying to determine if I wanted to wear my purple uniform or my casual t-shirt and pants. I wanted to look cute for Gaara and my outfit was more than that. It was sexy, however, I couldn't remember the last time I wore comfier clothing.
"Ino, dear," I heard the door open and my father's voice coming in.
"DAD!" I screamed, grasping the towel tight against my body. Anxiety and fear overcoming my thoughts as I clutched onto my towel. "I'm getting dressed!"
"Sorry!" He quickly apologized and shut the door to my bedroom.
"Give me a minute." I barked while grabbing some underwear and a bra. I rummage through the drawer searching for a certain set. Once my eyes see the red lace, I grab the matching underwear and quickly put it on.
"You're usually out by now," I heard his voice through the door, the apology shouting from it.
"I slept in," I replied while putting on my orange t-shirt and pants. Ditching my ninja attire and going for casual, briefly I wonder if Gaara will like it?
"Sorry," He apologized once more and I couldn't help but smile. He does this on accident like three times a week but nine times out of 10 I forget to close the door. My poor father.
"What did you need?" I asked while opening the door for him.
My father had his hands covering his eyes and I smiled at his modesty. He was dressed in his usual work attire so I figured he must have gotten back from T&I unit not too long ago.
"You can look now, dad," I reminded him politely. I smiled when his hands dropped and turned back to head into my room.
"Ah, yes," He muttered while following me into the bedroom. "The meeting tonight-"
"Yes, I can't forget about the meeting," I whispered while blowing my bangs out of my face. I rolled my eyes before turning to face him.
"-It has been postponed."
"What?" I blurted out, failing to contain my surprise. Relief flooded over me, but then I remembered it was only postponed not cancelled.
"Honey," his hands rested on my shoulder causing me to look up at him. "I think you and I both know what a small part of this meeting will be about."
No kidding.
"However, it's not the whole point of it. You don't need to stress yourself."
"I know, Dad." I escaped from his touch and walked towards my bed. "But, it's hard. I know that no one else is supposed to know and it's basically all a lie. It's just hard to lie to everyone."
"I wouldn't consider it a lie, but this is something you need to talk about with him."
"Why was it even postponed?" I questioned him. "Was it you? Did you postpone it? Oh, you're the best!"
I jumped up to hug this man I'm so lucky to call my father. Always looking out for his daughter, what a good man.
"No, Ino, it wasn't me." He hugged me back then let go. "It came from the Nara side. Something about Shikamaru saying there was some sort of conflict with scheduling."
"Shikamaru?" I looked away, bemused. He did this?
"Yes, and I suggested we reschedule in 4 days." My father moved my bangs behind my ear and I smiled back.
"You mean 2 days before they leave?" I smiled even brighter.
"Yes," he returned the smile.
"You're the best!" I hugged him once more and gave him a big squeeze.
"Ino."
His tone became serious and I looked up while keeping my arms around him.
"I'm not sure what's going on, but Shikaku seemed worried for Shikamaru. He said he was acting stranger than usual."
"Really?" I mutter laying my head against his chest once more. Shit, he was right. Was Shikamaru really that bothered after last night's altercation? He made it clear he didn't have anything to say.
"Yes. In fact, your mother said he was here this morning when the shop opened, but you were still asleep." He leaned back and looked down at me. He was here? I couldn't fight my eyes opening wide as a response.
"I had no idea." I mutter back. He came here this morning? Of all days to sleep in...
"Why not use this day off to go talk to him?" He suggested, raising a brow at me. However, I knew my father. That was a command.
"Fine," I roll my eyes and step back to sit on my bed. I subconsciously bring the charm of my necklace to my mouth and began to toy with the silver between my lips. "I'll go check on him."
"Good," he smiled before turning to exit the room. "And Ino?"
"Huh?" I release the necklace and look up at him.
"Your teammates are friends for life. Don't let anything come in between that."
With a final smile, he exited the room and his footsteps echoed down the staircase.
"Ugh, he knows." I groaned as I fell back onto my bed. I stared at the ceiling, my ears tuning in on the chirping birds.
Shikamaru. Why would he go through all that trouble to postpone this meeting? He HATES getting in between topics like this. Why was he here? He never visits. What else does he have left to say?
"I gotta go talk to him."
I quickly jump out of bed and ran down the stairs.
"Bye mom. Bye dad." I shouted as I flew past them. I could hear their goodbyes mumbled in the distance as I ran out the door.
I continued jogging towards the Nara compound, unsure of why I was so eager. Well, I knew why I was, but what did I expect? What did I expect to hear from him? An apology? Well yes, one of those, but what else? I knew he was right and really the only thing he owed me was an apology for basically calling me stupid. However, I knew deep down there was something else I wanted to hear. Either I didn't know what that was, or I was pretending I didn't.
I slowed down as I stood outside the compound and I frowned. What am I doing? What do I want? I walked up to the door and knocked. I could sense someone coming and it was Shikaku. Just great. I rolled my eyes before the door opened.
"Hi." I greeted bubbly with a giant smile plastered on my face.
"Ino," he muttered, opening the door completely.
He glared down at me and I knew a redhead has a reason to do with it. If there is anything about Shikaku Nara, he is big on tradition and I am one big tradition breaker. Honestly, I think he's been slightly peeved since my mother gave birth to me, a girl, the day after his wife gave birth to Shikamaru. I broke tradition that moment on. He has an extremely close bond with my father and I guess he expected the same for Shikamaru and I. We do, but I guess our opposite sex hormones just causes issues for him.
"Is Shikamaru home?" I asked peering around him while looking into the hallway.
To think I ran through these halls so many times when I was younger, chasing Shikamaru and Choji into the many different rooms. Our laughter echoed down the hall for hours while our fathers hung out, discussed their lives, and enjoyed the time away from their wives. The simpler times. I used to sit in all their laps and laugh while they all roared with laughter. In fact, I think they all loved me more than their sons at times. Shikaku included because all he ever did was talk about how much a lazy piece of crap Shikamaru was then. At least, he is proud now. Shikamaru is the smartest man in the village and has proven it many times. I inwardly roll my eyes.
"He is," he responded. "Shouldn't you be able to tell?"
"Huh?" I looked back at him and he scowled.
"I thought your father said your sensory was getting better."
"It is." I nodded. "I'm just not great at making out the differences with so many people around in one area. I mean there's like 10 people here."
It was true. I had been training on it everyday before Gaara and them got here. I could now sense multiple chakras and their signatures. I just still had trouble figuring out whose belongs to whom when there a multiples around. I mean I can if I am in complete focus, not just off of a whim.
He raised a brow and nodded back. I could see he was pleased with my answer, and I fought to roll my eyes at him once more. He was very picky with my training at times. I know he feels I haven't caught up with Choji and Shikamaru but he hasn't seen me train in months. He wouldn't know.
"He's in his room." He stood to the side already anticipating my next move.
"Great! I am just going to run back there. Thanks!" I shouted as I ran past him and down the halls.
I heard a brief mumble from him but didn't make out what he said. As I neared his door, I stopped when a woman's laugh filled the hallway. I closed my eyes and breathed in and out deeply. My breaths grew deeper, as I concentrated on the signatures around me. I could see two in his bedroom. I could see them conversing in his bedroom. They laid in his bed, their arms moving about as they spoke expressively. The laughter erupting from both of them.
Whatever he has to say, he definitely won't say it now.
My eyes shot open as I turned back and began to walk down the halls. My feet fighting with the weight I carried knowing I couldn't converse with him. I guess I will just have to ask another day. I mean what did I expect? Of course he would be spending this day with her.
"Ino?" A familiar voice called and I looked in the direction of the voice. A smile forming on my lips as I recognized the person it belonged to.
"Hello, Yoshino." I smiled at Shikamaru's mother and gave her a small wave.
"Were you seeing Shikamaru?" She asked, her head tilted to the side. She was holding a broom and wearing her usual cleaning apron. It reminded me of the times when I used to help her tidy the kitchen after dinner. She used to have an apron just for me.
"Uh, yes. I was just on my way out." I responded, pointing towards the main door.
"Well, it was lovely seeing you dear. Don't be a stranger." She smiled at me before turning to continue her cleaning. Her comment struck me harder than I expected. I haven't been coming here as often as I used to in almost a year. Guilt overcame my sadness and I couldn't at her anymore.
"I won't." I murmured. I had to remember to come see her more often.
I continued walking and made brief awkward eye contact with Shikaku. He sat still on the couch, reading a book. Breaking his attention from it to watch me as I left as quickly as I came.
"Thank you again," I stated while exiting the door.
My feet began to quicken their pace as I ran off the compound. After getting over a kilometers distance from the compound, I slowed down to a comfortable walking pace.
"Well that couldn't get any worse," I muttered while eyeing the ground.
"What couldn't have?" I heard a gravel voice respond and my eyes widened briefly with a loud gasp.
"Kami, Gaara!" I shouted in fear at his sudden appearance.
He stood a few feet away near a tree. He was resting against it, he eyes staring into mine. His hair was tousled and still drying from a shower I assumed he had earlier. Dressed in his usual attire with his gourd on the floor next to him. I could guess he must have been here for more than a few minutes.
"Did you follow me here?" I exclaimed while walking towards him. Did he somehow follow me from home?
He closed his eyes and remained silent. I frowned as he avoided the question.
"Well?" I questioned once more, standing only a foot away from him.
"Your father said you were here." He opened his eyes and I closed mine. Of course, he must have showed up after I left.
"Yes," I scratched at my arm lightly looking away from him. He didn't show it, but I could tell he wasn't too fond of finding me here. "Oh, the meeting is postponed by the way."
I tried to change the subject and he nodded in acknowledgement.
"Nara mentioned it this morning." His response was short and I could sense the tension.
"When did you see him?" I peered at him curiously. Shikamaru was everywhere this morning.
"Temari." Again a short reply, but it gave me all the answers I needed.
"Of course." I mutter looking away from him.
Of course, he went and picked her up like a gentleman. I guess since I was asleep, he must have went straight there afterwards. Enough about Shikamaru, Gaara is here in front of me and it must be a sign from Kami.
"Well, " I give him a bright smile and brush my body against his. He instinctively places his hands on my hips. "Enough about this, how are you?"
I purred, wrapping my arms around his torso and looking at him with an even bigger smile.
His response was to give me a long kiss. This kiss was a greeting and an "I miss you" all in one. I responded eagerly, wrapping my arms around his neck. Tightening the grip on my hips, his body presses itself against me and a smile plays on my lips. He was giving me a big hello.
"Is Kankuro home?" I asked, disrupting our kiss. My lips brushing against his with every word.
He shakes his head slowly, his lips caressed mine while doing so. I give him one more peck, but he captured my lips into an even bigger kiss. One full of longing and desire.
"Let's go," I speak breaking the kiss for a moment before continuing it. "Before, we don't end up making it there."
He released my lips from the kiss, but only kept himself centimeters away. I knew he was testing me. Seeing if I would be the first to turn away and head off to his apartment, or continue kissing him. I give him a quick peck and forcibly pushed myself back. I smiled at him, and he returned one that knocked me off my feet.
His smile was one I have never seen before. It was larger, brighter, and care-free. As if I was looking at a boy who stood at the same level as me, and not from a Kage who had a whole village to run. As fast as it came, it disappeared as he took my hand and began to lead me. I could feel the heat rise from my cheeks as I tightening my hold in his hand.
For once, no other thoughts came into my mind except for that I was a girl and he was a boy. A boy, I was madly in love with despite all other reasons not to. A boy who had taken my heart 10 months ago and has kept it with him. A boy, who also gave me his heart 10 months ago, and I never let it go. Not then, and especially not now.