Chapter 13: The Stupid Fork

A/N- prompt used: [Object] Fork
Word Count- 738

"I swear to Merlin, if our waiter doesn't return with our food soon, I will eat this fork."

Draco would have laughed at absurdity of his wife's statement, but they'd been at the restaurant for four bloody hours and he was about to take that fork from Astoria and stab the next person he saw with it.

"I can not believe how slow the service here is," Draco growled. "What, do they have to fish the lobster out of the ocean or something?!"

Astoria glanced over her right shoulder where the sun had set over the bay hours ago. "It was a nice thought," she said, turning back to give Draco a supportive grin.

Draco rolled his eyes and rested his palm over Astoria's on the table. He threaded his fingers through hers and squeezed tenderly. "I'm so sorry. What a way to spend our first anniversary, huh?"

"I don't know," Astoria replied, her grin turning a little lopsided as she squeezed his hand back. "I find that even when we're experiencing something terrible, it ends up as a wonderful adventure so long as we're together."

Draco shook his head, his cheeks heating in the candlelight. She was always saying things like that. What did he do to deserve her? What did he do to deserve a year of marriage with her?

"Madam, Monsieur."

"Finally!" Draco blurted out, and he couldn't find himself regretting the exclamation. He was way too hungry to consider decorum, especially with this night's shoddy service. Honestly, he just wanted to eat his shellfish and go home.

The waiter placed the lobster dishes down in front of each of them and made a hasty retreat. Good riddance.

Draco tucked into his meal right away. At least the food was delicious. Maybe they could salvage this night after all.

Draco held back Astoria's hair as she vomited into the toilet.

"I shouldn't have eaten it… I knew it was a bad idea, I knew it…" Astoria babbled in between dry heaves.

Draco ran a hand through her blonde hair, brushing the tangles out with his fingers. Then he set to braiding it for lack of anything better to do. Finally, Astoria laid her sweat-soaked forehead on the toilet seat— gross— and set to evening out her breaths. Draco stood up to run the flannel under the faucet for a moment and then draped the damp cloth along the back of Astoria's neck.

"You alright?" he asked, carefully curling some of her hair out of her face with a pointer finger.

"Mmm."

"Can you believe your beloved sea life turned on you?"

Astoria snorted. She dragged her hand along the tile floor and inched it up the porcelain toilet until she was able to reach down the cleavage of her gown. She pulled out a fork. "I will stab you, Malfoy," she said, blindly jabbing the silver utensil in his vague direction.

"Whoa now. Where in the world— did you steal that from the restaurant?"

"Yes," Astoria answered, her face still smushed into the toilet seat. "I wanted it."

Draco blinked. "Why?" he asked, perplexed.

Astoria raised her head up slightly and looked at Draco through smeared mascara rimmed eyes. "Because I was holding it when I realized."

Draco felt his legs give out and he dropped into a seated position on the floor beside Astoria. "Realized what?"

Astoria's lips slowly curled up into a smile, and the hand still holding that stupid fork brushed over the slight curve of her belly. She glanced down at her stomach and then back up at Draco, her eyes alight and twinkling with happiness.

Draco's eyes flitted over his wife's appearance for several long seconds. When he ultimately met her gaze, his worry gave way to elation. "Oh… OH!"

"Best anniversary gift ever," Astoria whispered.

Draco's eyes welled up with tears. They were going to… they were…

He reached for his wife's hand, and brought the back of her palm to his lips, kissing it exuberantly. Still clutched in her fist was that ridiculous stolen fork.

"We must get this fork framed!" he announced as Astoria giggled through her happy tears.

The fork was framed in a glass box a week later and placed prominently on the fireplace mantle as a symbol of the wonderful disaster that was Draco and Astoria's first wedding anniversary.

And there it remained, long after its thief had been buried six feet under.