He smiled at her, sitting next to her at the table, "You really didn't have to wake up this early. You must be exhausted."
"It's not a big deal. I'd hate to miss saying good-bye to you," he smiled, "You promise to call when you get there so I know you're safe?"
She giggled, "Yes Dad, I promise. I'm honestly surprised they extended winter break to three weeks."
Sam laughed, "Yeah, well the Brotherhood decided to destroy half the school so they really had no choice."
She rolled her eyes, "The things you miss in a coma. Oh shoot, I have to go or he's gonna leave without me."
"I doubt that," he stood with her, "But I'll walk you to the car."
They chatted some more as they walked to the garage. Remy's smile faded as he noticed Sam walking with Rogue. She had spent the last three days with him. He felt that familiar pull in his chest. Why had he agreed to let her come still? Oh right, because he'd do anything if it meant spending time with Rogue, he didn't care in what way. Though he admitted his preferred way was naked, rolling around her room. Remy put the rest of the bags in the trunk as Sam walked Rogue to the passenger side door.
He opened the car door, "Well I guess this is it then."
"Yeah," she looked up at him, "I'll miss you."
He rubbed her shoulder, "I'll miss you too. Don't forget about me," he joked.
She smiled, "I make no promises," she teased.
He leaned down for a kiss but she turned her head to the side. Remy couldn't help but smirk, so they weren't at kisses yet. She smiled and slid into the car. Sam closed the door and waved as they drove away. She stretched once they were on the highway. Remy drove with one hand, relaxing the other in the arm rest between the chairs. She unconsciously grabbed his hand and squeezed.
He glanced over at her, "Everything okay?"
She looked back at him, her brows scrunching together, "Yeah, everything's fine. Why do you ask?"
"Well," he looked back at the road, "Not that I mind but you're holding my hand."
She pulled her hand away, "Oh, sorry. Force of habit I guess."
He cleared his throat, "It's fine. Are you hungry? We can stop for breakfast any time."
"Um, yeah. That sounds good," she smiled, "I brought a bit of cash with me."
"Don't you worry about money," he pulled into a diner, "I feel bad for the people that have to work this early. I haven't been awake at this hour since my last heist."
She opened the door as he killed the engine, "I can drive if you need a break and please don't blow your money on me. After my birthday I'm sure your funds were pretty wiped out."
They both closed their doors, "No, really. Money isn't and will never be an issue for me. I'm, well, I come from a lot of money. And I'll be fine to drive."
He looked over at her. His heart almost stopped when he noticed she was still wearing the rice necklace. She looked back at him and smiled. He resisted the urge to pull her into him and kiss her. She looped her arm through his, pulling him into the diner. They seated themselves in a small booth and ordered their food. Rogue smiled at her large stack of pancakes. Remy watched her pour blueberry syrup on them then asked the waitress for whipped cream and a cherry.
"Make that two cherries and some whipped cream for me too please," Remy added.
Once everything was in order they began to eat. She took a sip of her coffee. God, she needed the caffeine. Remy relished the taste of the much-needed cup of coffee as well. He should have elected to leave later. If truth be told he hadn't gotten much sleep since he started sleeping alone again. Something about having her next to him was calming. He reached his fork over to take a bit of her pancakes.
She swatted his fork away with hers, "Get your thieving hands away from my pancakes."
He gave her puppy dog eyes, "I just want a little bite. Are you really going to deprive me of such sweetness? And you call yourself a friend."
"Remy Etienne LeBeau," she acted offended, "If you wanted pancakes so badly maybe you should have ordered them."
"What if I trade you" he offered, "A bite of this mouthwatering French toast for a small sliver of pancake. It seems more than fair to me."
She smirked at him, "And what if I don't want French toast."
He raised an eyebrow, "Well what else at this table would you want?"
She rolled her eyes, "Nothing, just take a piece of pancake."
He shrugged, "Alright then."
He took a slice of the pancake. He played it cool but inside he was a little hurt. Would her answer been different if it was Sam here? But why Sam? Sam didn't spend every free moment he had sitting by her bedside when she was in a coma, talking to here and praying she'd wake up. Sam wasn't the one that asked Beast every day about her condition and see what he could do to help. Sam didn't give up some of his power to help her heal faster. Sam wasn't the one who found her, hadn't carried her near lifeless body. Hell, Sam didn't even notice something was wrong or help look for her. Sam hadn't been there through her nightmares, hadn't saved her when everyone thought she was lost.
Sam lost nothing to be with her, he had. He lost his job, almost lost his life and without a doubt lost his heart now that she wasn't his. Sam didn't love her the way he did. She wasn't a source of light in Sam's life, wasn't the air that filled his lungs. Sam wasn't afraid to lose her. Sam didn't even know why each moment with her was so precious, so important, so…limited. He found peace in one thought, Sam would never have her virginity. He would never have her heart, her love. Not the way Remy did. He was her first everything and no one could replace that.
She looked at her food. She could feel it, like a gravitational pull. She still loved him, still wanted to be with him. Why did she do this to herself? She could have just as easily stayed home, stayed away like she told herself was best. But she wanted this extra time with him, the day was getting so close. She sighed to herself, this was going to be a very long winter break. She quietly ate the remainder of her pancakes. He examined her expression. She looked conflicted. He wished she'd talk to him like she used to. Things hadn't changed that much. He reached across the table and grabbed her hand.
"Where are you," he rubbed her hand with his thumb.
She looked at their hands, "A happier place."
He pulled his hand away, "You look tired. I'll grab the check, you head to the car."
She stood up, "Yeah," she kissed his cheek, "I'll see you out there."
He grabbed her hand as she went to leave, "Are you sure you're okay petite?"
She smiled and patted his shoulder, "Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind. We'll talk more later."
He only nodded then asked the waitress for the check. Rogue walked out to the car. She massaged her temples, now was not the time for her to lose control. She'd been having flash backs and flash forwards of the past and the future while she was in the coma. She had been stuck inside her own head for over a month. Her body ached. God, why was having power always painful? She stretched a bit more then got in the car. Remy got in a few minutes later. He looked at her before starting the car. He felt it safe to see what was wrong once they were on the road again.
"Rogue," Remy kept his eyes on the road, "Are you sure you're okay," he looked at her.
"I'm fine," his eyes widened as he looked at her, "What? Is there something on my face?"
She pulled down the visor and looked in the mirror. She gasped and closed her eyes, flipping the visor back up. Remy pulled to the side of the road. He turned and grabbed her face. She looked back at him with red and black eyes. The red had bits of green in them. It was the most amazing thing Remy had ever seen. He leaned his face closer to hers. Those eyes were hypnotizing. She noticed his eyes seemed to glow as well. She closed her eyes, the feeling of hot lasers causing her eyes to burn. Remy tried to get her to open them again but noticed she put her hands over them.
"Just keep driving. I'll be fine," she assured him.
"What's going on Rogue," he said as he pulled back on to the road, "Something's off about you."
She felt her skin tingle as the burning went away. She pulled her bare hand away from his. She dug in her pocket, pulling out her gloves. She pulled them on quickly. She looked out the window. They drove in silence until one. Remy pulled into another diner for lunch. Rogue looked at him, waiting for him to get out of the car. He looked back at her, his eyes laced with concern. She opened her door and got out of the car. She wouldn't go running to him. They were done, over, just friends. She hadn't noticed him get out of the car as well. He fell in step beside her for a moment.
He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, "You're losing control. That's what's going on, isn't it?"
"Please just don't worry about," she looked down, "I'm fine, really."
They walked into the diner together, seating themselves yet again. Rogue ordered a salad, Remy a hamburger. He watched her carefully as she ate. He wanted her to talk to him, to tell him what the hell was going on. He needed to know she was okay and needed her to have control around his family. He wouldn't let Jean-Luc get any ideas.
"Please," she whispered, "Please stop looking at me with those eyes."
He couldn't help it, she looked so distressed, so…tired. She looked down at her half eaten salad. Beast said it would take a few days to readjust, but she felt so weak. Her powers felt like they were crushing her. She still wasn't strong enough and he knew. But he craved it, craved the feeling of her skin against his. His hand wrapped around her throat, the life slowly leaving her body. She could feel his want to destroy her. Then there'd be no one left to stop him. She could feel him, inside her head, taunting her.
She grabbed her head, "Stop," she pleaded, her voice barely audible, "Please just leave me alone."
Remy put a twenty on the table, "Come on chere, let's get you somewhere to rest. You've been through a lot lately."
She looked up at him as he pulled her from the booth, wrapping his arm around her shoulder protectively. He opened the passenger side door before walking to the trunk. Rogue watched carefully as he walked back to her, blanket and pillow in hand. He reclined the seat all the way back, placing the pillow on the headrest. He then pushed her back and draped the blankets over her, buckling the seat belt over it. She went to resist but he kissed the top and closed the door. She turned to face the driver's side as Remy slipped into the seat. She was surprised at how heavy her eyes felt but she tried her best to stay awake. Remy began to hum a song she couldn't place but soothed her none-the-less. He glanced over at her sleeping form. He wished she could always look so peaceful. He glanced at the clock.
"Merde," he mumbled, "Four already. See, I told you we'd make great time. They're gonna love you, I just know it. Not as much as I do but," he paused, reaching out and stroking her head, "I'm trying but it's so hard. I miss touching you and holding you. This just doesn't feel right to me," he cleared his throat, "God, when did I become so emotional? But this distance, it eats me alive. It's shameless but I'd beg if I thought you'd take me back," he pulled his hand away, "But it seems pretty clear that you're moving on and you don't feel that way about me anymore, don't…love me anymore. I just, I can't let you go. I couldn't back then, and I can't now. I'm sorry, I guess I'm trash at trying when it comes to you."
He wiped his eyes, Rogue didn't need to see him like this. The last thing he wanted to add to her plate was guilt. She rolled over, tears falling from her eyes. She kept her eyes closed, wanting to hear what he had to say. So that's what he thought? That she'd left all her feelings behind. It would be so much easier if she could, if they both could. She'd had dreams about her fate long before he came into the picture. At the time that's all she thought they were, horrible dreams. She should have paid more attention and just not gotten involved. If she could go back in time…
She couldn't bring herself to finish the thought. She'd go back and change a lot of things but not him. She'd wanted something with him more than she'd wanted anything else in life. If she could she'd go back and never release Apocalypse. She'd train harder, be stronger, resist Mesmero's mind control. Then he'd never get hurt and they'd have all the time in the world. Sadly, time travel was a power she did not possess, but if she did.
She ground her teeth, feeling him yet again inside her head. Praising her for the limitless power that she did possess. A true prize for any collector. Yet she felt it in his heart, a genuine disgust for her "affection" for someone less powerful. He'd called them weaknesses and Remy a demon. No, not a demon…The Demon. She tried her best to ignore him but he'd go on about the past and how The Demon took her away. She didn't understand and she wished he'd just…
"SHUT UP," she screamed while sitting up.
Remy grabbed her hand, "What's wrong? What happened?"
"Bad dream," she lied, "What time is it?"
He looked at the clock, "Eight thirty. Time is really flying by."
She looked at him, "Do you want me to take over driving? You look like you could use some rest."
He looked out his window, "We can stop here for the night. I promise to split the driving tomorrow, but you need more rest. I can tell."
They pulled into the hotel parking lot. Rogue walked to the trunk as Remy headed into the hotel to get them a room. She slung their overnight bags over her shoulder. Remy greeted her at the front door, taking the bags from her and handing her a key. She followed him closely, mentally reminding herself not to take hold of his hand. She noticed a few people whispered as they walked by and she could only imagine what they were saying. She blinked a few times as they entered the room, noticing only one bed. She looked at Remy questioningly.
He put his hands up, "I swear it's nothing funny, this was the only room they had left. Everyone is booked with holiday travel, I'm sorry. Look, I'll sleep on the floor."
She looked at the floor, "No, it's fine. It's not like it's the first time that we've…slept together. Um, yeah, so do you want to get a shower first? You've been driving all day, I'll order us something to eat."
He nodded, pulling a pair of shorts out of his bag. She watched him walk into the bathroom. She let out a sigh, he looked absolutely beat. She looked at the dinner menu, deciding on grilled cheese sandwiches and chili. She also ordered two cups of root beer. He came out of the steamy bathroom just as she finished ordering. He sat on the bed, watching her send Sam a quick text. There was a knock at their door. Rogue walked over, coming back with food. They ate in silence, happy to not be stuck in the car. He stole a few glances every now and then. She always looked so beautiful. He carried their plates to the tray in the hallway. Rogue's back was to him as she stood near the window. She was looking out, staring at nothing in particular. He wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head on her shoulder. He knew he shouldn't be this close but he couldn't resist, just for a minute.
"What are you looking at," he asked, his voice sending chills down her spine.
She turned around, running into his bare chest, "Nothing," she looked up at him, her hands resting on his chest.
His head moved down towards hers, his one hand touching her cheek, "Rogue."
"Yes," she felt her breath get caught in her throat.
He pulled away, his judgement getting the better of him, "You should probably get in the shower now since we're leaving early tomorrow."
"Right," she walked over to her bag, pulling out a tank top and some shorts, "Thanks," she said before walking into the bathroom.
He looked up at her twenty minutes later. She wore short black shorts and a green wife beater. Her hair was still damp, though she towel dried it. She walked over to the bed, sitting next to Remy. He couldn't help but stare. Her pajamas left so little to the imagination and this had been the longest he'd gone without sex. She looked at him, confused. He turned to face her, his hand touching the side of her face. He brought his face closer to hers, keeping them just inches apart.
"Remy," her lips brushed against his.
Rogue's cell phone began to ring before he could close the gap, pulling them both out of the moment. She grabbed it, looking at the caller ID. It read SAM. She quickly picked up the phone. He felt his heart break a little as she walked into the bathroom, babbling to Sam about her day. The moment they may have had was gone now. He went back to the window, gazing out into the world. He needed to get his mind straight. He knew he'd crossed some arbitrary line a minute ago and he needed to get himself back in check.
"Yeah," she smiled, "I'll call again tomorrow. I miss you all too, love you guys. Bye," she hung up the phone, looking at Remy, "The mansion sends their love."
He looked back at her, "That's good. Logan miss you the most."
"No, he misses you the most," she teased, "Yes, he told me that if you try any funny business he's gonna cut off your…"
"Please," he begged, "don't finish that. I can let my imagination wander with that one."
She yawned, "Well we better get to bed."
He crawled into bed next to her, turning off the lights. She was asleep before her head even hit the pillow. He pulled her close to him, her back flush against him. He buried his face into her hair. He missed the smell of strawberries in his face. He knew he shouldn't but he pulled her hair away from her neck and kissed it. He heard her give a little sigh. He went to kiss her again but stopped. He rolled over, his back now facing hers. He couldn't do this with her, couldn't watch her be with someone else. He felt her squirming around and let out another sigh. She was dreaming and from the way her body was responding it was sexual in nature. He closed his eyes, prepared to hear her say Sam's name.
"Remy," she moaned, "Oh, there."
He rolled back over, making sure she was asleep and not just messing with him. He smiled when he was sure she was truly asleep. Her dream was about him. It made him feel better knowing he could still bring her pleasure even when he wasn't doing anything. He kissed her forehead.
"I hope you keep having the sweetest of dreams chere," he whispered before also falling asleep.