Hey there! Sorry the long wait, me and my beta had issues with our emails, but here it is and… the next chapter is ready to be beta read.

As you've noticed we're going to go back in time a little in this chapter :)

I don't own Glee.

Chapter 2:

Struggling you

The girl who will never be chosen. Though for a brief moment, she thought she could be that girl, the girl who gets the boy. He chose her right? It wasn't like she dreamed it.

"And how long had that lasted?" Her voice keeps echoing in her head.

But, it doesn't matter. She has friends now and her friends chose her. They trusted her. They're her friends, aren't they? Glee club means so much to her. It's not about winning and performing, though it is a nice bonus, but she really cares about them all. Even her.

She thought they could be friends but apparently they are destined to be rivals. The funny part is that she can't bring herself to hate the girl. She can't even dislike her.

"You can't hate me…"

And she can't. She supposes it's because of her nature. She can't really hate anyone.

"You can't hate…"

It almost sounded like she was…begging?

"Rachel?"

"Yes?"

"Where did you go just now?" Leroy asks her as he sips a cup of tea.

"Hm?"

"You seem distracted honey."

"I'm not." She smiles.

"Hm." Hiram, her taller father puts his cup on the coffee table. "No, your father is right. You seem distracted tonight." They're having tea, a usual nightly thing in the Berry household.

"I don't know. I'm still very excited about regionals." They won for the first time after all and, they did it using her song.

Hiram pouts playfully, "We're such terrible dads."

She laughs. "No! Of course not Daddy."

"Your Daddy is right. We are."

"You guys have been watching all of my performances. It's really okay."

"We promise that we'll be there at Nationals," Leroy says happily.

"In New York?" she frowns.

"Uh, well… next year then?"

"Regionals, next year," she nods, smiling.

"Deal."

"Deal", they say with happy faces.

"Okay. I think I'm going to sleep now. I'm a little tired." She stands up. "Good night Dad, good night Daddy." She kisses both of them.

"Good night honey."

"Good night little star."

"Why would she beg?"

She says to her empty bedroom as soon as she gets inside.

"That's-" she shakes her head. "Yeah right, like she would beg you for anything…"

She approaches her bed and distractedly takes her pillow. She is looking at nothing in particular as her mind is in overdrive. She presses the pillow against her chest as something comes into her mind.

Get it right?

But what was she doing wrong? Is it so bad that she wanted what all normal teenage girls want? Is it so bad that she wanted Finn? Is she going against the laws of nature or something? Was the fact that she was dating the quarterback something so out of place? Why should girls like Quinn only have this? Of course she is destined for bigger things, but why can't she have a little bit happiness now?

Does anybody really know her? She's Rachel Berry and she wants everything too much. She wants to focus on her dreams, her career, and Broadway. But she also wants to be noticed now. She wants the quarter-Finn. Finn, she wants Finn. It has nothing to do with the fact that he is popular.

He chose her once. He can choose her again. What does Quinn have that she doesn't?

Well, just to start, she is Quinn fucking Fabray.

Am I cursing now?

Rachel arranges her pillow pulls the sheet down and gets in bed.

I'm a better singer though, she felt the need to point out. It's not that she wants to compare herself to Quinn. How can she? She will never be Quinn. She knows it and she will never have her.

Friendship! She will never have her, she likes Finn, Quinn likes him too. So they're natural rivals.

I'm not a moody person.

The ex-cheerio is kind of unpredictable. It's difficult to know when she will be scary Quinn or just annoyed Quinn. But once in a while if we're lucky, sweet Quinn shows up. Though a rare thing, Rachel had seen it only days ago when Quinn decided to support the glee club diva with the whole original song thing. Well, she thought she caught a glimpse of it. No, Rachel thinks a large part of their confrontation was actress Quinn. Unfortunately she has had the displeasure of meeting this Quinn before.

What her angle is though she doesn't know yet. Why did she support Rachel if their previous interactions have indicated that she would do exactly the opposite?

It was a good idea. Quinn is a smart girl and we won. So, I was right and she knew it. That's it. Or, she wanted to distract me. She wanted me to believe she was my friend and then I wouldn't go after Finn. That's not really logical though, why would she fear me?

Maybe Quinn was right. After all, in the end they got back together. And maybe it is time to move on. She is single once again and can focus on what really matters. She will be a star; she will get out of this town and…

You're right Quinn, I don't belong here.

She falls asleep and weird enough she dreams about Quinn. The blonde girl keeps telling her over and over again, you don't belong here. But she can also hear a voice in the background. He is calling her.

"Rachel…"

"Finn?" She narrows her eyes, trying to see the boy. But the school hallway seems so dense, like it is surrounded by fog.

"Don't look back," Quinn says in a serious tone.

"But he is calling me."

"Don't look back. You have to go. You don't belong here Rachel."

And then the scene changed. Why is everything black and white?

Quinn is holding her wrist firmly and walking very fast, dragging Rachel with her. It's night and it's dark. They are walking through an empty street. Definitely not in Lima.

"We're here."

"Where?"

"Hi," Kurt whispers. "Ready?"He is in front of a car.

"What?" Rachel is confused. Why everything is old? Like it all just came from a forty's movie.

"Kurt will take you to the country frontier then you guys will take a ship to New York. Don't worry, everything is going to be okay. You will be safe."

"I don't get it…"

Kurt embraces her shoulders. "Rach, come on, we have to go."

"But Finn?"

"He will be fine. You can't be here Rachel. Please go. Forget about Finn…"

"I can't-"

"Yes you can!" she shouts angrily. "Get in this car now!" she says between gritted teeth. Rachel is speechless as her heart is pounding into her chest. There's something really wrong.

"Please," Quinn says as her eyes are locked on Rachel's arm. The brunette girl gets curious and follows Quinn's viewpoint. Then she finally understands.

"Go follow your dream. Go to New York. Be a star," she smiles. But the smile vanishes as she looks at Rachel's arm again. She grabs the Star of David and rips it of fiercely.

"But my dads. And my family," she cries out.

"I'm sorry."

"Finn…"

"He is going to marry me like my family wants. It's how it is Rachel. Please don't hate me. I'm just saving you."

"But I love him."

"Love?"

Quinn nods to Kurt and the boy start pulling her into the car.

"You will be safe. It doesn't matter if you love him."

Or capital H-I-M…

Cause you were born this way, baby.

My mama told me when I was young…

"Why am I not singing this part again? Well, I think Tina will do great anyway," Rachel thinks as they are rehearsing in the auditorium.

It was such a weird dream. She woke up the next day confused and thoughtful. But she eventually put it to the back of her mind as she had other things to think about that were more important than some random dream. Maybe it was just her subconscious trying to ease her pain and making Quinn seem less mean. Yes, that's probably it. It wasn't like Quinn would ever bother risking anything to save Rachel Berry. It was just a dream anyway. She'd blame the book she was reading; it was something about a book thief. Focus, that's what she needs. Okay, yeah dancing. Focus on dancing. And Finn elbow.

"My nose!"

Who could tell that a broken nose could bring so much drama? The good thing is that Quinn is actually helping her. She does have a perfect nose. Maybe her subconscious was right; Quinn would help her. Okay, she is not saving her life and yeah, she is actually helping Rachel to get rid of her "Jewishness" but anyway. Quinn is helping her.

And apparently her broken nose didn't cause just drama. She's never done a duet with Quinn before. So here she is, rehearsing with Quinn.

"See I knew we could manage to be civilized," Quinn says as she stands up from the piano bench.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, last time we were here alone it was a total fiasco."

"Really?" Rachel starts gathering the music sheet. "I mean, we won anyway," she answers distractedly as she is concentrated on her task.

"Yeah. We did," the blonde girl says in a low voice. It's funny because the low tone in her voice is what catches Rachel's attention. There was something more; she wanted to say something more. Rachel knows it. Just like before. It was like the voice and the words weren't in sync.

"That's a good thing right? It's okay Quinn. I think it was better this way. What kind of song we would write together?"

Quinn nods ever so slightly. An uncomfortable silence surrounds them. It's inevitable; they start thinking about the last time they were going to work together and the reason why they didn't manage to work on the song back then. Quinn fixes her dress. She wants to leave but yet she doesn't feel like moving right now. She wants to speak. But how can you say something so important to someone without giving away how much you care about them. Not that she cares that much, because she doesn't. She is only concerned about Rachel as she would be concerned about anyone in Glee club.

"Rachel?"

"Yes?"

"Uh- are you sure about… about the nose job?"

"Yes I am," she says right away. The last thing she wants is getting vulnerable in front of Quinn. The girl is perfect. She would never understand what is like to be her.

"It's just that…" Why can't she say it? It's so easy. Rachel I think you're beautiful just the way you are. Easy.

"I think…"

"What? There we go," she says as she finished her task and all her sheets are organized again. "I don't want to take up anymore of your time and I think we will do a good duet. I don't think we need to rehearse anymore."

"Yes, the duet. I think that too. These songs are really… uh… yeah I'm going now," she says awkwardly.

Just say it Fabray.

I can't.

Why not? Come on, you know how it is… you can help her.

She frowns as her facial expression that was soft moments ago turns into a cold and distant façade.

Hello Lucy, nice to see you again. You're wrong and weak; Rachel has the right to do whatever she wants to make her feel good about herself.

She will look different. Her heart tightens with this prospect.

"Are you okay?" Rachel's voice brings her out of her musings.

"Yes."

"Are you sure? You don't seem okay. I can bring yo-"

"Yes!" she shouts. "I am fine Berry."

Rachel nods. "See you around?"

"Whatever."

What is she doing?

Say sorry.

No, she will get over it. She always does.

Why are you so mean?

Rachel walks away and she watches frustrated.

It hurt that Finn was the one saying the right words after their duet. Rachel didn't listen but it still stung. Would it be different if she was the one saying it? She isn't blind; she knows Rachel has some kind of admiration, hero-worship thing towards her. What hurts is that she knows she is really not worthy of any of it.

She is Lucy Quinn Fabray and apparently she can't run from her past. It doesn't mean as much to her as Finn thought it would, having a picture of Lucy in his wallet. It means nothing, as she is still his pretty girlfriend. What can she possibly say to prevent Rachel from changing herself? Whatever it was, in the end, she would still be a big hypocrite. Not to mention their previous interactions; her behavior toward the diva, and all the name calling?

But, Rachel eventually decided not to go through with it. She's always admired Rachel strength. Why had she doubted the girl, of course she would eventually do the right thing. And now here she was, about to tell her that. And nothing will stop her.

"Hey Rachel," She calls out to the glee club diva. They just finished their gaga performance.

"Uh… Hey Quinn."

"Nice shirt."

"Thanks," Rachel smiles shyly. "Yours too."

She swallows and her eyes flutter everywhere but on Rachel. Maybe this isn't the best idea. Why make things complicated? Everything is just the way it should be; she has Finn and she is going to be prom queen (Lucy occurrence aside). Rachel is fine. She will be fine. No nose job.

"Whenever you want to talk about it- anything, just… I'm here."

She freezes. Just no. She doesn't want to talk about it with anyone, especially her.

"No. It's personal. Why do you always want to intrude in other people's life Rachel? It's none of your business."

"I'm sorry?" Rachel says, confused.

Quinn shakes her head and all of sudden turns and storms out.

Rachel storms in her bedroom. She is done. She doesn't need her.

Friendship! She doesn't need Quinn's friendship. She is done trying; they are never going to be friends. Why has she wasted her time trying anyway? She got the boy before. She can do this again. Finn will see who Quinn really is.

A bitch! A heartless, selfish bitch who only cares about herself and a crown. And yeah! A cheater!

Oh crap.

Okay, she wasn't a cheater and Rachel kind of felt bad for exposing Sam like that. Maybe Santana was right after all. It's always her fault. She will never get it right because she is a fool.

Apparently, she is a fool who can't shut her mouth.

Dying inside? Could you be more dramatic?

Did she tell him to follow her? And why would she care about their relationship?

Don't say anything, don't say anything. It's her dream…

So what? She is with Finn. And she is a bitch.

"Just get her something simple like a wrist corsage. Girls like Quinn, you don't want to do anything that's going to distract from their face so…ask for a gardenia with a light green ribbon wrapped around it to match her eyes."

Rachel ends up in the girl's bathroom. After crying her heart out, she finally washes her face. She is so confused these days and Jesse in town is making everything more confusing. Why do people care so much about prom? And why is she going after her? It wasn't her fault Finn decided to channel a cave man.

"We still can dance." She says hopefully.

Thank god her complexion is not like Quinn's otherwise the slap mark would be so much more visible than it is. She accepted it already by now. No matter how badly Quinn can treat her, she will always be here. Begging for her attention, wishing they could be friends. She is Quinn Fabray. Prom Queen or not, she is the prettiest girl she has ever met but, she is also a lot more than that.

Quinn is the prettiest girl she has ever met. But now she sees it as a privilege because not Finn, Puck, Sam, or not any other boy at this school are here now ready to take her to dance.

Wait what? What did you say?

"Are you coming or not?" Quinn calls her over her shoulder and Rachel could swear she saw a smile and maybe something else hiding just beneath the surface.

Quinn is not, and will never be, easy to figure out. But, she is a lot more than this pretty girl everybody sees. Rachel doesn't admire her because of her beauty. Yes, she thinks the blonde is pretty, but she knows it is something else. Something Quinn may think has been long lost. Was it Lucy?

"Yes." She shakes her head smiling.

"Come on. I don't have all night." Quinn stretches her hand to Rachel. "I want to dance," she says casually.

Rachel takes the blonde's hand and yeah, weird. Not bad, definitely not bad. They have held hands before. But now it seems so different and oh God, so good and her heart is tightening with the prospect of letting that hand go.

Oh god… what is happening to me? Quinn will let go of my hand. I'm sure she will. Any minute now. I mean it's not like I'm her date or something.

She laughs, in her head of course. Quinn and her?

We're holding hands, and we're going to dance. And she is the prettiest girl you've ever met…and what does that have to do with anything? It means I would love to have her as my date. Oh God this is getting worse and worse! I'm not her date and I'll never be her date, cause I'll never have her!

To endorse that statement and as if she had listened to Rachel's monologue, Quinn let go of her hand. They are back at the gym. Back to reality.

"I hope Kurt is okay," Quinn says.

"Yeah." Rachel tries to calm down, but it is nearly impossible as her head is in overdrive "Me too. I'm sure Blaine is comforting him."

Quinn nods. "Let's go."

The rest of the night was drama free. In the end, they had a good time. She was happy that Mercedes and Sam enjoyed each other's company; it was a great idea indeed, the group prom. She only wished Finn had behaved. This way Quinn wouldn't be alone in her prom picture. Except that deep down, she thought it was better this way. She didn't want any boy there at Quinn's side.

Is she selfish for this? Not at all, the only reason why she doesn't want it is because in her opinion, nobody in that stupid school could be worthy of that spot.

What does it mean? She doesn't know what it means. Or worse, maybe she does. And that scares her more than anything.

One more chapter before the New York's kiss. I hope you keep in tune, and of course your review is very much appreciated.