Mari & Ilna: What can I say? I'm enjoying this adventure every bit as much as I was on day one. Maybe more.
REAL Worlders-thanks for all the enthusiastic support. You guys are the best!
Always Watching (1/1)
Steve and Catherine settled into the two adult sized chairs Ms. Lane had brought into her classroom just for the night's parent teacher conferences.
"I spent too many years watching parents perching on the tiny classroom chairs," she explained. "I find it's easier to have a conversation with someone when their knees aren't up around their chin."
Steve and Catherine chuckled as the experienced teacher passed them a folder containing examples of DJ's work over the last month.
"As you can see both his reading and his handwriting have really improved over the semester. I can tell you've been working with him at home." She smiled. "Not that I'd expect anything less."
Nothing made Joni Lane happier than active and engaged parents who cared about their child's education and made it a priority. Too often parents sat across the desk from her making excuse after excuse for their lack of engagement with their child when it came to schoolwork.
She did everything she could to help and encourage each child during school hours but without the support and cooperation of parents, grandparents, and caregivers it often wasn't enough. It broke her heart every time she saw a child falling behind because she knew it would get worse with each passing school year as the lessons got more difficult.
The McGarrett-Rollins household was living proof that even with busy careers and social obligations it is still possible for parents to meet, and most often exceed, what their child needs in order to thrive at school.
"And as far as math goes, he's one of the best students in the class," Joni reported.
Steve and Catherine beamed.
"That might be my mom's influence," Catherine suggested. "They play math games together all the time. She says he has a real knack for them."
"She's absolutely right," Joni agreed. "At this age it can be a challenge to get them to understand the concept of numbers and how they work together, even on the most basic level. Not DJ. He shows an amazing grasp of the 'whys' of math, not just the 'hows'."
Steve squeezed Catherine's hand. "That's good to hear."
"His social skills are really improving," Joni continued. "He gets along well with his classmates and has gotten much more eager to answer questions and share in class as the months have gone on."
Considering his background, the experienced teacher had been concerned about how DJ would operate in the sometimes boisterous environment of a first-grade classroom. He was definitely reserved his first few weeks. He was quiet, tended to hold back in classroom discussions, sometimes hesitated to raise his hand even when she was sure he knew the right answer. But as the weeks went by she watched him open up. He was now often the first child with his hand in the air when she asked a question and was fitting in seamlessly with the other children on the playground.
"I know it sounds like a cliché," she smiled sincerely, "but DJ is an absolute delight to have in class. He's eager to learn, he follows my directions, he's kind and respectful to his classmates, he's always eager to help with classroom tasks."
Catherine smiled. "He loves to come home and tell us about the ways he got to be a helper at school."
Joni nodded. That segued perfectly into the next thing she wanted to talk to them about. She turned her laptop so the screen was facing Steve and Catherine.
"As you know, for a while now I've been making a short video with each child at the end of the school year just as a kind of review," Joni said. "It helps both the children and the parents to see how far they've come since September, or in DJ's case January."
"It's a fantastic idea," Catherine said.
"I ask a few structured questions, but I try to leave as much room as possible for each child to talk about what they think have been the most important things that have happened during their year. As I'm sure you can imagine, their definitions of important vary widely."
"I bet you end up with a lot of interesting videos," Steve said.
Joni nodded. "To say the least. I obviously knew there's been a lot of upheaval in DJ's life over the last year, and a lot of really big changes, so I wasn't sure exactly where to start with him. I knew for sure that I wanted to try to keep him focused on the present. There's no reason to keep reopening old wounds from his past."
Steve and Catherine nodded in agreement. DJ had been very excited the day he came home and reported he and Ms. Lane had made a video but he hadn't revealed any of what they talked about since it was supposed to be a secret until the parent-teacher conference.
"I knew that he'd spent the day at the governor's office for 'Take Your Child to Work Day' back in April so I decided to start out asking him about that.".
"It just so happened there was a big vote that day, so I got to take him inside the Senate chamber. A couple of the senators let him sit in their official chairs and pretend to cast a vote. Then we had a post-vote wrap up in the governor's inner office so it was a big day," Catherine said.
Joni pressed pay and Steve and Catherine instinctively smiled as DJ's face showed up on the screen.
"I liked spending the day with Mommy at work," DJ said as he sat with Ms. Lane in what generally served as the reading corner.
"What kind of things did you do?"
"The senators Mommy knows were voting on a new law that day. I can't remember exactly what it was about but I know it was important. Everybody who works with Mommy was really busy and we were a little late by the time we finally left to go watch them vote. Mommy said we were 'cutting it close' but we'd probably make it because the votes don't always start exactly on time."
"I guess that's because there are so many important things happening beforehand," Joni guessed.
"When we were leaving the building there was a lady coming in and she was crying. Mommy put her arm around the lady and we all sat down on the bench. I don't know what they were talking about because it was grown up stuff but I did hear the lady keep saying that she knew Mommy had to get to the vote and Mommy kept telling her it was ok and she stayed there and talked 'til the lady stopped crying."
"Were you late for the vote?"
"No." DJ stopped for a minute, lost in his thoughts. "I don't think Mommy would have been mad even if we were."
"You don't?"
"No, that lady was crying and she needed help. The vote was important but not as much as helping someone. Mommy always helps people if she can. She made that lady feel better the same way she makes me feel better when I'm sad. She's a really good listener."
Joni pressed pause and smiled at a teary-eyed Catherine. "He's a very perceptive little boy. He goes on to talk about how big the senate chamber is and all the things he got to do there but none of those things stood out to him as much as his mommy stopping what she was doing to help someone."
Steve dropped an arm across Catherine's shoulders and squeezed.
"Children notice everything the adults in their life do," Joni said. "And it makes a big impact." She turned the laptop back towards herself and fast forwarded a bit. "I'll send you a copy of the entire video but there was one other part I wanted to show you while you're here." She again turned the laptop towards them and hit play.
"The last thing we did that day was watch Governor Lea talk to the reporters. Mommy said they do it after every vote whether they win or lose so people know exactly what happened. Sometimes the reporters ask Mommy questions too."
"I guess that's part of her job."
DJ nodded. "Sometimes reporters try to talk to Daddy too, but he doesn't like it."
"He doesn't?"
DJ shook his head adamantly then appeared to reconsider. "Well, sometimes he's on the news telling everyone that they arrested a bad guy and he doesn't mind that I don't think but other times when Daddy isn't working reporters come up to him and tell him they want to write a story about him because he's a hero and he always says no."
He bit his lip then went on.
"My Uncle Carl did a lot of bad things."
Joni wasn't sure where this was leading but gave the young boy the time he needed to work through his thoughts.
"He sold drugs and he stole things and he beat people up. After it happened a bunch of bad people came to the house and he'd tell them about all the bad things he did and they'd all clap and call him boss and act like he'd done something good and he was always really happy when they were there. It was kind of like …" the young boy struggled to wrap his mind around something he still didn't fully understand, "he only did those things so people would think he was important."
Joni waited.
"My Daddy puts all the bad guys in jail and he helps people who have been hurt and he makes it so it's safer for everyone. But when a reporter wants to talk to him about it, he says no. And when we have people over at our house they never talk about it. When we went to the VA with Grandpa there was a man who wanted to write a story about the things Daddy does there, but Daddy suggested they write about Chet instead. He's a judge and he comes in on his days off and helps the veterans with their problems and he doesn't charge them anything."
"Chet sounds like a nice man."
"He is. He always gives me and Angie lollipops. Daddy said if they put a story in the paper about him maybe other veterans could come and get help if they need it and that's a good reason to talk to a reporter." DJ stopped for a second and thought. "Daddy doesn't want a lot of attention even though he does some really awesome things. I guess just doing the things is enough."
Joni took a beat, clearly caught off guard by the depth of understanding in a child so young. His early experiences had left him with many scars, but they had also left him with an ability to see the world in a way most 7-year-olds couldn't.
"I think you're right," she said.
Joni stopped the tape "I'll let you watch the rest at home. I just wanted to say again … DJ couldn't have ended up in a more perfect situation. He has a kind heart and a sweet spirit but considering what he went through in his early years, if he had ended up in the system, in a group home or worse yet being shuttled from family to family, the results could have been disastrous. Watching him blossom over these last few months has been one of the most profound joys of my teaching career. I have no doubt he will continue to thrive and be very successful next school year and beyond."
Catherine wiped away tears as Steve spoke around the lump in his throat. "Thank you."
"Earlier this evening I was talking to some parents about some behaviors in their child I think we need to nip in the bud and they both told me they try their best to set a good example when their children are watching. I told them their children are always watching and sometimes it's the moments that seem small and uneventful to them that have the biggest impact on their children. You two have an understanding of that I wish I could bottle and share with all the parents of my students."
"It helps for them to have amazing teachers too and you definitely fit that bill," Catherine said sincerely. "We're just hoping you don't retire before Angie is in first grade."
"That little firecracker would be worth sticking around for." Ms. Lane laughed as she stood and the three of them headed towards the door. "I imagine she's gonna keep her teachers on their toes from preschool through graduation. Lucky for her she not only has great parents but an awesome big brother to help her every step of the way."
THE END
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