Tell her

3/10/22

Time for the Truth

Hello there. My name is the Doctor. I'm a Timelord from a planet called Gallifrey. It's lost in another dimension. I'm the last of my kind and my people got wiped out in the great time war. I'm over 1200 years old and I can pass for a human.

It was very early in the morning and I was beside my TARDIS which looks like a 1960's police box. It's a space and time machine and it's bigger on the inside. Yesterday I met Clara Oswald, an old companion and friend of mine. I also met a woman called Ashildr who is immortal and seems like she and Clara are friends.

No one was out, probably still sleeping. I wandered around after a few minutes and met a friend of mine called Oswin. "What are you doing this early in the morning?" I said. "Nothing much. What are you doing here?" She replied. I knew she wasn't telling me anything. "Same thing as you," I responded. I don't know what she was expecting but I don't think this was one of them. We talked for a few more minutes before I left.

I didn't want her to get involved in the whole timeline thing. I didn't want to think about it and I hope she doesn't ask about it. It'll only make things worse if she knew.

I walked around for a bit before seeing her and Bella together. They looked like they were talking. They've always been good friends and I didn't want to ruin that. I watched them for a bit.

I heard someone talking but I wasn't paying attention. "Doctor?" A voice spoke. I looked at them for a few seconds before looking away. "What?" I asked. "Don't you think it's time to tell her the truth? It's been 5 months. You can't keep it from her forever," Madelyn said. "No. It's not worth the risk," I replied. "Why not?" She asked. "I don't want her to not trust me," I responded. "That's not a good excuse. She'll understand," She replied. I know she wouldn't. Everytime I think about it, it hurts. "I don't think she will. She doesn't remember anything…know anything," I said.

"That doesn't mean that she won't. This is better than the alternative and you know that. She's your friend, Doctor. That's all you need," Madelyn said. I wish I could believe that but I know she won't. Not after yesterday. It'll make things more complicated. I approached them and they stopped talking.

"I need to talk to you. Do you mind?" I said. "Not at all," Oswin said. We headed towards the TARDIS. None of us spoke. We stepped inside and she sat down. I closed the doors behind me and sat down next to her.

"I think it's time you knew the truth," I said. She didn't say anything. This was going to be hard. "Remember yesterday?" I asked. "Yeah." "It's about that," I said. I started explaining about the asylum and how I met her. I left out some parts because I didn't feel like explaining them. I took a break and waited for her to say something. "I couldn't have that happen to you, again," I said, looking at her, "I know what you're thinking. I know I lied to you but I wanted to tell you, more than anything." She didn't speak for a moment before saying, "Who else? Who else knows?" "Only me and two others," I replied. "Which two people?" "Madelyn and Bella," I said quickly.

"How long?" She asked. "Since the beginning," I responded, "I'm surprised you're taking this calmly. To be honest, I thought you wouldn't." This seemed to be the wrong thing to say. "Why would you lie to me? I trusted you!" I knew this would happen and I wasn't ready to face it.

"I wanted to tell you. I really did. I didn't know how you would react! You always really had a great time these past 5 months. I never wanted to ruin that." I sighed. This wasn't true, I never wanted to. "You & Bella always had a great friendship. Both of you got along great and didn't have to worry about anything. Safe. That's a life I knew I could never have. I was constantly on the run & never staying in one place. I was saving people's lives, protecting planets from destruction. I'm doing the same thing to you. When I...did that, I knew I had to stay here & doing what I had to do. I never..." "You never had to do that. You said that you would never lie," She interrupted. I didn't know how to respond to this. I put my hand on her arm.

"Look, I'm trying to protect you," I said. "From what?" She asked, a little louder. "I lost so many companions over the years and I didn't want to lose you," I replied. "Maybe you shouldn't have done it," She said coldly before standing up and leaving. "Oswin, Oswin, Oswin," I called out. She didn't say anything and headed out of the TARDIS. I was left devastated and stayed in the TARDIS for a few minutes before heading outside.

I met Madelyn again. "I'm assuming it didn't go well," She said to me. "No. I told her and explained but she wouldn't listen," I replied. I explained what happened and when I finished she said, "Talk to her then. It'll never get better if you don't." "What if she won't? She doesn't understand." "Make her understand," Madelyn said. "I already did and it didn't work. Thanks for pushing me to do it. I really do," I said.

I headed to Rosewood Park hoping she'll be there. When I got there I looked around and couldn't see her. I walked up to someone and asked, "Excuse me, have you seen a young woman with curly brown hair, five feet?" "She's by the fountain. I'm a friend of Clara Oswald so if you ever want to talk you know where to find me," The woman said. This was a little bit shocking. "We should talk soon," I responded, "Thanks."

I headed over to the fountain and saw her sitting on one of the benches. I sat down next to her. "Hey. Are you okay?" I said. She didn't say anything for a bit. "I'm fine," She said, "Why are you here?" "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. I really am," I said. "He was right then. You were being reckless," She said, "Why me? You could've saved another companion but you didn't." I didn't want to tell her and it hurts to think about. "I didn't want to lose you again. It was hard enough the first time," I said. "That could be said for any other companion," She said, coldly, "Tell the truth." "I am," I said. I couldn't tell her the entire truth. It hurts too much. "You don't sound like you are," She responded, standing up and leaving. I knew it was hopeless and looked at the fountain for a long time.