Chapter 2 : Are You Ready?
I wasn't sure what exactly I was expecting when we entered the Mystery Dungeon. I certainly can say that I'm not going to complain about how mundane our entry was, but I can say that I was expecting something a bit more impactful.
If it weren't for the monotonous nature of our surroundings, and the exceedingly corridor-like pathways, I would not have guessed that we were anywhere extraordinary at all. However, looking closer, the leaves on the trees, the patterns on the bark, even the angles at which branches stick out from shrubs, is all too… perfect. Not a flaw in any stone, or knot in any tree. It was, in a way, off-putting
Of course, as stated before, it is the layout, more than anything else, that gives this place away. As we traverse, we enter these rooms and corridors. They give the impression of clearings, and yet, when you brush against the 'walls', so to speak, you'll find yourself bumping against a solid… force, of some sort. Not unlike concrete, perfectly smooth concrete.
The texture is as odd to me as it is viscerally satisfying to touch something so flawlessly flat. There is, however, a certain kind of cognitive dissonance involved when you see this foliage in front of you, but you're blocked off by something entirely invisible. It's like I'm walking inside of a glass enclosure.
Cole and I walk side by side as we come across something of interest in our next room. In the corner, far to the right, is what looks like a gleaming object. Squinting my eyes a bit, it seems like a small pile of… coins? Out in the middle of a forest? Why?
Cole turns to move on to the next corridor, but I instantly make a bee-line for the coins. I know he notices, and I hear him turn around. "Hey, what's u- oh! Poké! I didn't even notice," he says. I don't have anything meaningful to say to that, so I stay quiet.
As I approach what I assume to be money, I can make out more detailed features. The gold coins on the ground are dominated in their surface area by a big bold P on the front. They seem to be ridged, on the sides, and as I stand over them, I notice two bits of text that stick out. For one, denominations, as one coin had a big '10' on it, and the other six only had a '1'. The other bit of text that sticks out to me is 'West Coast - Best Coast'.
Are we on the West Coast? I suppose so, though I haven't exactly seen a coast near by. Then again, I've only really been in a forest thus far...
"How much is it?" I hear from behind.
At this point, I must conclude that, whatever the lineage of this body, there must be some level of Buneary in me, because at that moment I jumped higher than I would've thought possible for a Pokemon with such short little legs. I twist around and face the Torchic behind me. He seems surprised, and honestly, I think I can relate- I'm surprised I didn't have a heart attack.
"Woah, hey, sorry! I didn't mean to startle you," Cole says, as I hold a leafy green hand to my chest. I allow a moment for myself to calm down.
Staring at the ground, I breathe slowly, in and out. I feel myself relax as I hear Cole scruff one of their talons on the ground. I guess this is what I get for paying attention to some coins and not my surroundings. My heart goes back to normal after another moment, and I finally reply, "16," having now calmed down.
"What?" he says with a tilt of his head. I breathe out my nostrils and elaborate the best that I can.
"Poké. There were 16 Poké on the ground." I turn around again and pick them up with my hands, the gold metal jingling together. I hear an "Oh!" behind me as I count them out and hand them to my Torchic companion.
"Here. You can take them. If you want to," I tell him as they land in his yellow feathers.
Cole looks surprised. "Huh? Uh, alright. You sure you don't want some too, dude?" he says, stretching out his feather to hand me some coins back. "This isn't a lot of money, but we're in this together, so you should have some too, don't ya think?"
I suppose I wasn't really thinking about it. Perhaps I should take some money with me as well. After all, money means a society, and a society means I need money for things. I'm not sure what things specifically, but I do know I need… things.
"Well… okay. Yes," I say, before taking the coins.
It is at this point that I must conclude that the universe has a sense of humour, or at least derives some mild amusement from messing with us.
As soon as Cole turns around to lead us to the next part of the dungeon, "Alrighty, we've been on this floor for a while, let's get go-" he gets tackled by yet another bug. I'd be amused myself if said bug weren't trying to attack us.
Let's see, red, yellow horn, big eyes, yes, this certainly is a Wurmple.
Ow.
Jeez, mon, what's with bug's and tackling me today? Did I step in honey or something? C'mon, I know I'm pretty hot, but when other pokemon talk about wanting to smash, I don't think they mean this, that's all I'm saying.
Wurmple gets off to ready its next attack.
I get up too and turn to face it. This guy doesn't look too tough. At least, he's definitely not as tough as he's trying to be. For all his growling, I can't help but find it cute. Aw, this guy thinks he can win!
I ready my stance. Both talons planted firmly on the ground, I give this guy my best glare, puff my chest out a bit, and get ready to fight.
"Alright mon, I know you wanna go, but we both now how this is going to end, so j-"
I'd keep going, but that little bastard just spews his strings in my mouth, eughh! Okay, no more playing around. I refuse to be made a fool of by bug boi over here.
I charge straight for him, "HRRRRMMMM"ing through my string gag as I do a little jump and kick my talons out to get him with a good scratch. I get him across the cheek, but I guess I left myself open, because the next thing I know, I'm tackled.
Again.
Argh!
The Wurmple giggles at me and sticks his tongue out. I peck at him from beneath his segmented body as well as I can. It doesn't seem to hurt him much, what with this big wad of sticky stuff in my mouth, but I'm pretty sure he got the message.
He hops off from my belly, and as I start getting up, this guy blows a damn razzberry at me and sticks my talons together with his string shot. Just…
I'm so very mad. I feel something build in my throat as I get styled on by this damn little bug bastard.
I start trying to go after him, but I immediately fall. This is so lame. Arcues, mon, if only Snizzy were here… wait, hold on, I have a partner, why aren't they helping?
I look over at where Arthur is, and that damn Wurmple follows my gaze. We both see Arthur freeze, eyes wide as he glances back and forth between the two of us. "Um… hi- hello?" they say.
Just like he did me, the first thing Wurmple does is go to tackle Arthur to the ground.
I can see him panic, before immediately diving forward and ducking as the Wurmple goes sailing over his head. The Wurmple skids to a halt and glares at Arthur as he turns around to face the deranged bug fighting him. He gives a nervous laugh, before turning to run.
The Wurmple chases after him. While they play Meowth and Rattata, I slowly allow a pressure to build in my throat again.
The Wurmple goes for a tackle, and Arthur jumps out of the way. A string shot flies as he lands, but it just covers his tail.
This Snivy is pretty agile, honestly, I do have to hand it to him. He can't keep this up forever, though, he's already panting, and I might not be able to burn off this string in time. Why hasn't he tried attacking yet?
I see Arthur relax a bit. "Okay. I get it now," I hear him say quietly.
What's he up to?
I can see the Wurmple gearing up for another tackle, and this Snivy just stands there. The worm charges forward, leaps for a tackle, and then something happens that I didn't quite expect.
Arthur slides forward on his knees, slams his tail into the ground, and uses the momentum to headbutt the Wurmple's belly from underneath. The Wurmple's eyes go wide as it gets sent tumbling through the air, landing on its face.
Alright, that was kinda clever, I guess. I wouldn't have thought to do that, at least. His stamina might be lacking, but Arthur does have a good head on his shoulders.
He smirks, looking a little proud of himself after landing back on the ground on his feet. He starts walking towards the Wurmple, but his eyes go wide as he's tugged back into place.
"Ach, what?" he says before glancing back to find his sticky tail stuck to the ground. He looks befuddled.
"I… well, I wasn't anticipating this," he says lamely.
Wurmple growls at him, and he turns his attention back to the worm assaulting us.
At first, Arthur looks scared again as the Wurmple slowly approaches. His eyes dart all around him, and I can almost see the gears in his head turning as he tries to think his way out of this.
The heat and pressure in my throat is nearly about ready to ember the string shot in my mouth, but I just need a tiny bit more time.
Suddenly, Arthur's eyes snap back to the approaching Wurmple, and he loosens up again.
The Wurmple goes for yet another tackle, and Arthur just stands there. I mean, I guess he can't really do much else, but I'm not sure what he plans to do if he can't really move. As the Wurmple jumps for his attack though, Arthur raises his left hand.
Wait a minute… no way, there's no way he's gonna do what I think he's going to do. There's no way that this guy, who's spent the past forty-five minutes all shy, has the balls to do what I think he's about to do. Can Snivy even learn that move? No, no, he has to be going for something else, I-
Well damn. Arthur used pay day.
Kinda.
When the Wurmple is about to collide with him, Arthur doesn't toss a hail of coins at them like a normal pay day, no, instead, he throws his poké directly. Into. The Wurmple's. Eyes.
The little thing is barely aware of what's happening as it gets beaned in the optics.
I finally am able to ember through my gag when this happens, so I do. My ember isn't very strong, but it works, and when I burn away the string shot, I say the only thing that should be said. A well deserved "Damn, dude!" comes flying straight out of my beak.
The Wurmple is on the floor, writhing and clutching its eyes as it wallows in 1 Poké coins. I take a certain amount of satisfaction as it whines.
Arthur's body sags with relief, and his eyes widen in surprise. I'd be pretty surprised too if I pulled that off.
"That was… damn, mon, that wasn't too bad. Pretty crafty, dude," I say. I mean, really, who does that? I don't even think he used a real move that whole time until the very end, and that was a pretty weird pay day. Speaking of…
"Where did you learn how to do pay day, dude? Snivys can learn that?"
I… how do I answer that? What moves do Snivy learn? I'm fairly certain that they learn basic grass type moves, but anything beyond that is certainly beyond me. I am definitely sure that Snivys cannot learn Pay Day, so even if I were really a Snivy, I wouldn't be able to answer him adequately.
I pay attention to the short grass beneath my feet, how it feels, in order to calm myself.
I cannot lie to Cole, what would I even say? I appreciate the compliments, my warm face is proof enough of that, but I don't know how to explain myself, so I don't say anything.
Eventually, after an uncomfortable silence, the Wurmple recovers well enough to stand again. It looks at me, then at Cole, whines, and runs off into the woods!
What?! Bu- ! I- ! Wha- !? Oh never mind, it's already disappeared into the false forest. I really can't wrap my head around this. The area around the forest is solid! How can a Wurmple just waltz on through like that solid force isn't even there? Is it part of the Mystery Dungeon somehow? Why?
Shaking my head from all these questions, I turn back to look at Cole. His cheeks are puffed up, and his face looks almost… determined maybe? I'm not sure, but eventually, he spews some Embers from his beak and burns away the string keeping his talons together.
"Alright, finally, I can move again!" he exclaims excitedly, jumping up from his spot on the grass.
"Alright Arthur, now we just need to get you unstuck too! Here, just hold still, and I'll burn away the…"
I notice him look me up and down, and I stare at the ground, embarrassed.
"Oh," he says, "Right. You're a grass type."
"Welp." He walks over to where I'm stuck, the grass bending delicately beneath his talons. I try to lock my eyes onto a little yellowish blade of grass in front of me. "We're probably gonna be awhile, dude, so get comfy."
Suddenly, I realize exactly what it is he's referring to. I am a Snivy. My tail is made of leaves. Leaves are flammable. I am flammable. He is a fire type. He breathes fire. Houston, whoever you are, we officially have a problem.
Cole sits down next to me, and says "We're gonna have to wait for it to dry so we can break it off, mon, sorry."
"How much- how long does it take?" I ask.
"About 30 minutes," he replies.
…
"Well, I spy with my fiery eye something… green."
Just… just end me now.