Chapter 4

As he sat on his bike in the parking structure, his thoughts were alternating between: Damn I love her! What trouble have I made for her now? What did her words back there mean? Does she feel the same? What she was getting at? Is she going to hurt me again? Will we ever be friends again?

He slid his helmet on, kicked the bike into action and rode off. Pulling into his driveway he swung his leg off the bike and felt his phone vibrate. Sliding it out of his pocket he was surprised to see Chris's name and a msg from her.

"Hey, I still haven't said everything I need 2 say 2 u" the msg read.

Streets heart fluttered as his hands fumbled for what to reply to her. Chris had been so icy cold how can this be, how can she suddenly be opening up to him, what had changed?

Street began typing "Hey, same. I'm sorry 4 leaving so quickly but my head wasn't in the right space 2 make small take with Hondo" he read the msg several times before hitting "send"

He walked inside and put his helmet on the table, took off his jacket and hung it over a chair. Street was shocked she msg'd him, he was reading into everything and driving himself crazy. She had been so cold to him, was he setting himself up for heartbreak? Chris wasn't stupid she knew how he felt, did she feel it too though? Was she ready to admit that now? Was she missing him already? Had Hondo left and she wanted him to go back? Was she trying to tell him that she wanted to be with him not Ty and Kira? Oh god Street thought make it stop!

That moment in the Kitchen at HQ ran through this mind.

"Their not right for you you know"

Chris swivelled around to look at him, she was so shut down, she stood silently and tapped her right hand on her right leg. What Street hadn't known though was what he saw as icy, cold, emotionless Chris was actually Chris trapped inside her own head. Everything inside her knew that he was right, her heart was screaming at her to run to him, to kiss him and tell him she loved him so deeply it terrified her. But what came out was:

"Not your problem Street …See you tomorrow"

Street remembered the pain, the feeling of his heart laying so many pieces on the floor.

"Ding" a new msg appeared

"when are u coming by again?"

Street replied "after next shift I guess, if u wanna talk like we were though it will need to be when Ty n Kira or the team aren't there" this time he didn't reread it just tapped "Send"

He sunk back onto the touch as his heart raced and his hands were becoming sweaty. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice the headlights of Luca's truck pull in the drive.

"Hey man" Luca said as he came in, "What's up?"

"Oh hey… nothing much just trying to unwind" Street replied.

"Wanna beer?" Luca asked as he stood in front the fridge.

"Nuh man, thanks I'm good…. it's been one hell of a day I'm shattered I think I'll just head to bed"

"Ding"

Street held his phone and made his way to his bedroom, closing the door before reading Chris's msg.

"wish u could come back now, but its after visiting hours. guess I'll c u tomoz after shift"

Street began a reply "How will I now if ur on ur own?"

He laid on his bed and staring at the roof. Did that sound desperate? Will she be on her own tomoz? How will I know? Guess I'll swing by after shift and wait if someone's there.

"I will txt u if anyone comes by, but doubt it. Lately its only u & the team. My family comes on the weekends"

Did that mean Ty and Kira were out of the picture? They had broken up? Weren't visiting her at all? Or are they away for work? On a holiday? Oh god I don't know….

Do I ask her now in a msg? No, he shook his head, she would want to tell me that in person I hope.

"Ok. Sweet dreams Chris, c u tomoz"

Street rolled over and looked out his window at the trees swaying in the breeze. He was just drifting off to sleep when,

"ding"

"Sweet dream Street, I miss u xx"

As Street read her msg a wave of the most amazing feeling swept through his body. He had to reply he just had to, he could not control that impulse.

"I've missed u 2 Chris

Thanks for our chat

C u tomoz xxx"

The next morning Street woke with a feeling he couldn't quite put his finger on. He was nervous, excited, scared and happy all at the same time.

Luca glanced at him sideways in the kitchen as he swooned and swayed.

"What's got you going this morning?"

"Ahhh nothing, just had a great sleep and looking forward to a beautiful day" he said motioning out he window as the sunrise made the clouds on the horizon turn pink.

Luca raised his eyebrows and tipped the cold coffee in his cup down the drain.

"Come on man, don't wanna be late" he said grabbing the keys to leave.

"I'm gunna ride in today Luca, I've got some errands to run after shift" Street said still bopping to the radio playing in his own head.

"Oh ok then… see you there man"

Riding in that morning Street couldn't help but notice the beauty in everything he passed. He arrived in the SWAT garage with a smile plastered on his face. He was feeling positive that he would have his best friend back by this evening. Life was looking up.

The shift was fairly standard. A bit of door knocking, search and sweeps and a bit of training on down time. Being paired up with the new substitute team member made him miss her even more. Recruit Logan was a good but had nothing on Chris. Street watched the clock all day. He was anxious to get back and see her. Every hour felt like an eternity. When their shift ended he was first out the door.

"Catch ya tomorrow" he yelled to Tan as he clicked up his helmet and straddled his bike. Tan watched him ride off in a hurry and turned to Hondo who was walking passed.

"He seem different to you today?"

Hondo smirked and nodded "Yeah … somethings up with him"

Tan raised an eyebrow and shrugged it off, he was too interested himself in getting home to Bonny.

Approaching the hallway corner to Chris's room Street mentally noted his heart rate racing. He paused and leaned against the wall. "Calm down man" he said to himself "…deep breaths come on, you can't go in there like this …..in…out…..…in…..out"

He pushed off the wall and made a point of slowing his stride as he turned the corner. He hadn't received a txt from her all day so he assumed she would be alone waiting for him. Shocked and fear cascaded through his body when he saw Ty coming out of her room, Street froze and spun around the other way and bee lined it for the elevator four strides away. Praying it would open and he could slip out of sight. Instead he clocked the stairway entrance to his left and slipped in, leaving the door an inch ajar to see which way Ty went. Streets breathing was rapid and his heart was pounding.

"What was he doing here? Why hadn't Chris txt him? Were they still together and he was about to be heart broken again? Was Chris just playing him"

Waves of fear, anger, sadness, confusion ran through his head as he watched Ty enter the elevator and disappear from sight.

"Ding" a txt from Chris lit up his phone.

"hey, how's ur day? Still coming by?"

Street froze. He instantly felt the fear he had been used to the last few weeks. Something about seeing Ty coming out of her room made him uneasy. He knew that something was up, but his mind was so confused and scared he couldn't focus. He stood in the stairwell for ages debating whether to send a txt back or just go see her.

"Just pulling up now"

He knew it was a white lie, but he decided to see if Chris would tell him about Ty being there.

"You alone?" He added

"Yep, c u soon" she flicked back.

Street rested his head back against the wall. He was so wound up now. Felt like that positive mood he had been in all day was so far away… the unease and sadness were creeping back in. He had lost his best friend once and was unbelievably terrified that it was all about to happen again.

Slowly he approached her room, he was scared, he thought he might find Ty or even Kira coming back, but as he turned into her doorway he saw that she was sitting on the window ledge alone. She lifted her head and smiled at him. He was caught off guard and now not sure how to act. He walked closer,

"Hey"

"Hey" she replied.

"You okay?" Street asked wearily. He felt like he was walking into an ambush. The hairs on his neck were standing up and his senses were heightened.

"I'm glad you're here" she replied, "It's been a tough day" She began to stand and move toward the hospital bed.

Street frowned in confusion and tilted his head a little to the side. His hands in his pockets he was consciously trying to control his breathing. He stepped towards her with hesitation.

Chris sat on the bed and this is when Street noticed a LAPD detectives' card on the table over the bed, next to her water jug. "What on earth?" he thought, his mind was boggled. This was only adding to his confusion and angst.

"What's going on Chris" he managed. Chris looked at Street and he again saw the fear in her eyes that he had seen the last time he was here.

"Oh god" he thought to himself "here we go again"

"I … ah ..I started today on cloud 9" she started letting a small smirk appear in the corner of her mouth. Street knew the feeling. He had been there this morning too.

"But then I got a call from Ty"

Streets shoulders dropped in defeat. "Yep here she goes again, she is in love with them and I'm about to get the we can't be friends' line" he thought.

"Kira didn't make it home after… well she ….. she's missing Street, actually missing…..Ty just came by to see if I had seen her and some detectives have been in too" Chris looked at Street and he could see the worry and guilt all over her face.

"Oh….. Chris…. I'm …I'm sorry …. I…. are you okay?" he stammered, dumb question.

"What happened?" Street realised in that moment that he had never actually heard her say whether or not she was still seeing them, he had assumed that they had broken up and he assumed again that she was keen on him. He felt so foolish and stupid. He was mad with himself.

"After I told them about the fundraiser night, they left here upset. We had had an argument and she was really hurt and upset. She walked out before Ty, he tried to stay and talk to me about not ending it but working through it, but I told him to leave and go with her. I yelled at them to leave, said mean things in anger, and she did just that. She left crying. I thought she had just gone downstairs or to their car to wait for Ty but when he left a few minutes later he couldn't find her. He checked near by places and went home to see if she took a bus, but no one has seen her since."

Street was slowly sitting himself down on the end of the bed. Ok he thought. Processing this in his brain was taking a bit. Chris was talking really fast and blurting things and his mind kept spinning off track. "So, they aren't together anymore, but she is guilt ridden because her actions likely caused something to happen to Kira" Street knew he had to play this carefully.

"Do they have any leads? Have you called Hondo or the Captain?" he asked

"No, I ….. I'm too scared to"

"Why?" Street almost shouted that, "they are the first people I'd call if someone I cared about was missing."

"Yeah…. But then I have to tell them the whole story…. I mean eventually they will know why Kira ran out upset, that I told her I had cheated on them….. with you" she said motioning to him.

"Oh" Street nodded, he hadn't considered that.

Chris was agitated and teary. Street wanted to comfort her with everything he had. He shuffled off the bed and stood in front of her. "What have I got to loose he thought. She can only push me away again. "

"Come here" He reached out and pulled her hands up to make her stand in front of him. She could barely look at him, she felt so guilt ridden. Had her selfish actions giving into her desire and kissing Street that night led to this. Led to something happening to Kira? Had she run off? Had someone hurt her? Where the hell had she gone?

Chris could not stop the tears that came next. Street wrapped his arms around her. She took several moments to unfreeze her arms and cautiously hug him back. As he lowered his head to rest his chin on top of her head he felt her shudder and whimper.

"Hey" he said pulling her back from him "We will find her. It will be okay" he comforted her.

Chris held onto him tight and cried for a while. Street held her back and let her cry. She needed it.

So much had happened lately they were both mentally exhausted. All Street knew is that he wanted to be here with her and no where else right now.