I'm standing at the bar waiting for the soft drink I've ordered for myself and Joan's vodka martini when I see Josh and the rest of senior staff walk into Hawk and Dove. His eyes immediately meet mine and he breaks into a full dimpled grin. I smile back, tucking my hair behind my ear under his close examination.
I see him say something to the group he's entered with. The other four join Joan at the table and he makes a bee line for me at the bar.
"You were promoted!" He exclaims, bouncing a bit on the balls of his feet and looking at me with wonder. He must have heard Joan mention it to Sam when she called earlier.
I grin at him. "I was."
"Of course you were, Sweetheart. You're incredible." He leans in and kisses me thoroughly. "I'm so proud of you."
I'm a little thrown at the use of the pet name and the public display of affection, but I also realise almost instantly that I adore both. My heart is beating a little faster in my chest when he pulls away. When I glance towards the corner booth housing our friends, I realize the view of the bar has been obstructed by a large group of people. It's unlikely that they saw anything. Not that I care if they did; I have nothing to hide. I wonder if Josh feels the same way, or if he knew we were out of sight?
"Club soda with lemon and a vodka martini," the bartender announces as he places the drinks I ordered in front of me.
"I'll get that," Josh states cooly, handing over his card. "And I'll also take 3 Sam Adams, a double Johnnie Walker and a grasshopper."
He turns his attention back to me. "You're having a club soda? Everything ok?"
"Yes." I give his hand a gentle squeeze as reassurance. "We split a bottle of champagne with dinner, so Joan is already in rare form and I just wanted some water. I'll have a few sips of your beer. You know, so we don't upset your sensitive system."
"I don't have a sensitive system!" He insists.
"Josh. Last weekend you had two and a half beers and participated in the wave from my living room couch while we were watching the Mets game."
"So? I'm a spirited fan. That's all."
I laugh outright, but I find him completely endearing.
We make our way back over to the table and slide into the two chairs at the end. I'm seated next to Joan and across from CJ, who seems to be in a wonderful mood this evening. She's telling a story and laughing her heart out. It's hard not to like her. She, Charlie and I eventually get quite caught up in conversation as Josh argues animatedly with Sam. Joan gets her opinion in the mix too, and Toby listens while he puffs on a cigar. Every so often I'll feel Josh's hand gently squeeze my leg under the table and he'll give me a little smile. At one point he leans back and rests his arm on the top of my chair. It feels like the most natural thing in the world.
As the evening progresses, I am, in fact, sharing Josh's beer. And I realize it when Joan points it out.
"Buy her a beer," Joan rolls her eyes at Josh. "God, don't you have any manners? She doesn't want to share a bottle with you. You're practically a stranger. Disgusting."
"Uh, it's really fine," I chuckle softly. The table is at a loss for words, and I don't know what to say either. Josh's eyebrows raise a bit but he keeps his cool. Toby and CJ exchange glances and I suddenly wonder what is and is not being assumed by each person at the table.
"She's a smart, savvy woman, Joan," Josh quips from where he's leaning back in his chair. "If she wanted a beer to herself, she'd say something."
"Well I know that. But it wouldn't stop you from acting like an oaf." Joan rolls her eyes but at that moment Sam slides into the chair next to her, returning from closing out his tab.
"What did I miss?" He asks, looking at each of us.
"Nothing." Joan scoffs. "Just Josh acting like he didn't learn any manners as a child."
"Well okay." Sam looks between his wife and his best friend, knowing when to stay out of it. "Anyway, we're all closed out. Should we call it a night?"
He's met with no objections from anyone at the table as we gather our collective belongings. Sam and a very tipsy Joan eventually head out, followed by the rest of the senior staff. Josh and I are right behind them, parting ways with CJ, Toby and Charlie as they pile into a cab.
"It's a nice evening," Josh notes. "Do you want to walk?"
"Okay," I agree and he takes my hand. We stroll through Georgetown in a comfortable silence, walking up the steps to his apartment.
Josh locks up behind us and sheds his jacket as he heads to the kitchen for a glass of water. I've really only been here a few times before as we typically spend time at my place. But he acts as though it's the most natural thing in the world for us to walk through the door together.
I join him in the kitchen and sit on the counter. He stands in front of me, circling his arms around my waist.
"There's something I wanted to ask you," he tells me.
"Oh?"
"There's a state dinner coming up next month. It's kind of stuffy and probably not the most fun you'll ever have, but I'd like you to come with me. Would you?"
"Absolutely." I beam at him. He looks almost relieved at my answer. But surely he knows that I was going to say yes?
He leans in and kisses me gently, almost as if he's solidifying the agreement.
"It's formal," he continues, "so I'll give you my card and you can pick out a dress."
"You don't need to buy me a dress," I almost laugh. "I'm capable of doing that for myself. I'm a smart, savvy woman, remember?"
"I know." He quickly offers quietly. "I just don't want you to have to. It's an event for my job. Besides, it feels kind of nice to be able to do something for you."
"You do plenty for me." I cup his cheek. I'm falling hard for this man, and though I promised myself I'd keep it casual it feels like there's no going back at this point, not that I want it to. At least I find comfort in knowing it may be evolving into something beyond a strictly physical relationship for Josh, too.
"I'd like to do more, Donna."
I look at him and he's stone cold sober and completely serious.
"I'm sorry the last few weeks haven't been ideal. But I want to be a better boyfriend. I'm just not very good at this type of thing."
"Boyfriend?" I question softly, a bit surprised that he's labeling himself that way.
"I… umm…" his eyes dart around and he looks suddenly nervous. "I guess that's a stupid title. I mean I'm a grown man and I didn't mean to-"
"I like it." I cut him off, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. "I just didn't know that's what you wanted."
"It is," he admits softly.
"Okay. Me too." I lean my head on his shoulder for a moment. But the prolonged emotional conversation just isn't us, so I can't help but add a bit of banter. "How is your fan club going to react when they see me with you at the state dinner?"
He shrugs his shoulders a bit, knowing immediately that I'm only giving him a hard time. "They love me in my tux." He tries for an air of confidence.
"I love you in your tux," I practically purr, lifting my head but keeping my hands on his biceps.
"I noticed," he grins somewhat cockily. There's no doubt that he's thinking the same thing I am about our first night together after the wedding. "But honestly, Donna? I'd be happy if they saw us together. I'd like for them to understand that I'm already taken. I don't want to be thought of as on the market because I'm very much in love with you."
I may have been trying to convince myself that I could sustain a causal relationship with this man, but it's certain to me now, upon hearing those words from him, that the bottom has fallen out.
"I love you too," I tell him with a slight catch in my throat. It may be fast, but I guess the old cliche of 'when it's real, you'll know,' is ringing true.
He leans in and kisses me soundly, sealing our commitment to one another.
I'm a goner.