"You got a haircut." Donna fell into step beside him.
He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, somewhat annoyed with her observation. "Ever the observant assistant."
"Why?" She narrowed her gaze at him. It was much shorter than normal and, frankly, she found his wild curls to be quite appealing.
"Gum," he swallowed hard, still in a bit of a huff.
"You got gum in your hair?" She raised her eyebrows in muted amusement.
"Audrey." He stated flatly.
"Audrey isn't allowed to have gum."
"Donna, I think I know what she is and isn't allowed to have."
"But you seem to have missed the memo on gum."
"Donna, she wanted a gumball. I told her she could have one if she didn't swallow it. I was just going to let her chew it for a minute."
"It's not actually the chewing that is the problem," Donna began. "It's that she tries to blow bubbles and just spits out the piece of gum."
"Are you under the impression that you're providing me with new information right now?" He stopped to look at her, gesturing towards his short hair.
She paused for a beat, making a face. It was all coming together now. Donna suppressed a laugh, though not very successfully. "No, I suppose not." She fell back into step beside him. "But you're late for Senior Staff and as soon as you're done there you have a meeting on social security in the Roosevelt Room."
"Kay," he muttered, tossing his backpack into a visitor's chair in his office and beginning to rummage through it. "Do me a favor," he asked her, pulling out a children's book. "Make sure the Italian ambassador gets that."
"The Little Red Lighthouse and The Great Grey Bridge? This is Audrey's?"
"No," he explained, "She has a one, though. I took her to that children's bookstore by my apartment last night and I saw they had a copy. He'd been looking for it."
"You're discussing children's books with Alberto Fedrigotti?"
"It… came up. Will you just make sure he gets it?"
"Got it," she told him, sticking the book under her arm to move on to the next piece of information she needed to provide him. "You have an 11:30 with Babbish, a 1:00 on the hill."
"Great," Josh muttered sarcastically.
"Your parent teacher conference is at 3:30, and you have to be back here to meet with Leo and State by 4:45. So, should I plan to pick her up while you're in that?"
"We can just get her after our meeting and bring here back here while we finish up."
"You want me to sit in on her parent-teacher conference with you?"
He raised his eyebrows, a somewhat vulnerable expression on his face. "That's not obvious at this point?"
Donna smiled softly at him. "I'll be ready to go."
OoOoOoOoO
After a parent teacher conference that left Josh beaming with pride, the three returned to the White House to finish the day. Josh, or rather Donna, had scheduled him fairly lightly knowing that they'd have Audrey, but things still popped up.
Josh sat behind his desk reading a memo while Audrey was situated across from him in a visitors chair, snacking on some fruit and cheese and coloring.
"Daddy?"
"Hmm?"
"Are there more trees or birds in the world?"
"Trees," he answered, not even having to pause his reading.
"Are there more trees or people in the world?"
"Trees." Josh's eyes flicked over to her. Audrey was still drawing intently with a purple crayon.
"Are there more flowers or trees in the world?"
"DONNA!"
"You bellowed?" She appeared in the doorway almost immediately.
"Audrey has some questions for you," he told her. "And I have a meeting with Toby and the NEA."
Josh stood and slipped on his suit jacket, leaning down to give Audrey a kiss on the forehead. "Stay with Donna. I won't be too long and then we can go home, okay?"
Audrey turned nodded her consent before turning around in her chair and giving Donna a grin, hopping down and rushing over to take her hand. "Donna, how many fish are there in the sea?"
Josh shook his head and chuckled to himself, heading down the hallway for his meeting.
OoOoOoOoO
"Your 5:30 appointment is here," Carol couldn't control the smile she was trying to mask as CJ paused in front of her desk.
"My 5:30? I have a 5:30?" CJ searched her mind over twice but couldn't come up with who her appointment could be as she peeked into her office.
"CJ!" Audrey jumped up and ran to the press secretary, giving her a grin and a huge hug.
"Hey, kiddo! What are you doing here?"
"Waiting for Daddy," Audrey offered, making her way back to Donna.
"Audrey has something to ask you," Donna tried to gently coax it out of the little girl, reflexively reaching down to smooth her hair.
Audrey looked at Donna and gave her a smile, turning her attention back to CJ.
"It's my turn for show and tell," Audrey jumped right in, her animated speaking style clearly an inherited trait from her father.
CJ sat down, a proud smile sneaking across her face. She thought she knew where this was going. She was the voice of the president, after all. It wouldn't be so out of left field for a little girl to want to take her to show and tell.
She caught the eye of Toby, Sam and Josh, who clearly needed to be in a meeting but had stopped to lean in her doorway and listen, shooting them a wink.
"...And I asked my teacher and she said..." Audrey's attention strayed from CJ as she looked over at Donna, already knowing who she was going to need to convince. "She said I could bring her," Audrey told her earnestly.
Donna nodded her head. "I know. Ask her," she encouraged Audrey to keep going.
CJ was beyond flattered.
"CJ?" Audrey stepped forward to the large desk. "Can I bring Gail to show and tell?"
The moment still would have been rather sweet if not for the hysterical laughter that erupted from the doorframe. The three other senior staffers weren't able to contain themselves, practically doubling over as they cackled. It was the hardest Toby had laughed in years.
OoOoOoOoO
"Is she here yet?" Josh peeked into Donna's cubicle.
"No. We just dropped her off at school not even two hours ago. You have to get some work done today, Josh! You're both going to be miserable if you're too busy to speak to her class."
"But you'll let me know when they get here?"
"Yes," she promised. "Though it's hardly her first visit to the White House. Now go get some reading done," she shooed him back into his office.
Twenty minutes later Donna peeked in to Josh's office. "They're here," she announced.
Josh gave her a smile, his dimples popping out, and hopped up, walking with Donna to the lobby where they were met by 15 preschoolers, most of whom were fairly apathetic about their White House tour.
But midway down the line of children stood a very excited Audrey Lyman, bouncing on the balls of her feet, brimming with excitement and wearing a full dimpled grin that matched her father's precisely.
"Good Morning," Josh stepped through security to greet the class and the teachers, extending his hand to welcome the head of the preschool.
"Good Morning, Mr. Lyman. Nice to see you again."
Josh welcomed the adult staff to the White House, giving them a quick rundown of how the morning would go, with some last minute changes due to scheduling conflicts.
Donna, who had been carrying an armful of visitor ID's, made quick work of finding a place to temporarily store 15 tiny coats and then distributing the ID lanyards with Audrey's help. Two children were assigned to each adult, the four teachers and three parent volunteers immediately on edge at the thought of a broken national relic. Donna and Josh accompanied Audrey and the three lead the way through the busy West Wing corridors.
Josh paused every so often to explain, in a level that the kids would understand, what happened in a certain room, or why a particular painting on the walls was important. He wasted very little time, though, as he knew that this particular part of the day wouldn't hold the kids' attention. Audrey took special consideration to introduce the class to Gail the Goldfish.
He ushered the class into the Roosevelt Room, taking a quick detour when he heard Toby yelling in the communications bullpen.
"Uh oh," Audrey had remarked. "Uncle Toby is a grumpy bear today."
The kids climbed into their seats around the table and stared blankly at Josh. "So," he took the lead, shoving his hands into his pockets and bouncing a bit. "Like I said earlier, my name is Josh Lyman and I'm the Deputy Chief of Staff, which means I work here, in the White House, for President Bartlet. But most of you probably know me as Audrey's Dad."
Donna watched him beam with pride at that statement.
"Yeah?" He pointed to a little boy in what is apparently a very itchy a blue sweater, who already had a question. "Uhh..." he looked at Donna, unsure of the child's name.
"James," Donna supplied.
"Yes, James?"
James put his hand down and stared at Josh. "My dad says you're all liars."
"Your dad sounds like a real creative genius," Josh snarked, forgetting for a moment where he was.
"Joshua!" Donna whisper scolded.
"You can tell your father that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but that I said his is wrong. And, James, maybe you can buy him a thesaurus for a holiday gift because that's the third time I've heard that particular phrase this morning."
Donna shook her head. "The Fifty States," she reminded him, getting him back on track.
"Right," he jumped back into it. "As you've been learning there are 50 states, the District of Columbia, and 6 territories in the United States. And the President of the United States was elected by the people as the leader of the entire United States. So, today you're here to see where that all takes place. I think your teacher explained this to you?"
Ms. Melissa piped in as if on cue. "We've learned about a different state every day for the last two months. And we've colored a map that we're going to give to…" Ms. Melissa looked to Audrey.
"My friend Charlie!" Audrey piped in.
Josh nodded. "The President's body man. That's a great thing to do. They'll display it in the outer office."
"Charlie. Okay," Ms. Melissa continued. She was slightly overwhelmed to be standing where she was, and Donna had long wondered if she was secretly a member of Josh's fan club. "So, we'll give the drawing to Charlie. And we've made the tree ornaments that Ms. Moss requested."
"Great," Josh piped in. "They save space on the District of Columbia Tree in the Pathway of Peace. It's the walkway surrounding the National Christmas Tree," he explained to the teachers before turning his attention back to Audrey's class. "There are 57 Christmas trees, one for each state, territory and DC. Each tree contains handmade ornaments from residents. So the ornaments you've made will be placed on the tree for DC. Any questions?"
A little boy, sitting on the far end of the table, shot his hand into the air, eager to be called on. "Yeah?" Josh pointed at the child, already apprehensive about what the "question" would be. "What's your name?"
"James," Donna supplied.
"I thought he was James," Josh gestured to the boy in the itchy blue sweater.
"That's James R.," Audrey supplied, pointing to the boy in the sweater, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And that's James B.," she pointed at the boy with his hand raised.
"Don't point, Audrey," Donna reflexively chimed in, gently redirecting Audrey's hand. "It's not nice."
"Okay, James B. What's your question?"
"I'm bored." He stated.
"James!" Ms. Melissa interjected. "We are using our best manners today."
"It's really okay," Josh laughed. He was well aware of the attention span of kids this age. "Now that you've had your tour of the West Wing, we're going to go into the Oval Office and meet President Bartlet. I think your teacher already told you how important it is that you NOT TOUCH ANYTHING."
"Okay," Ms. Melissa instructed, "Everyone find your partner and your teacher. We're going to walk quietly and do just as Mr. Lyman instructed and not touch anything on the way, alright?"
Josh opened the door, Audrey and Donna in tow, and started out towards The Oval. Even after the repeated warnings not to touch anything, both James' ran their hands along the walls as they walked, opening every possible drawer they could find and knocking over a stack of papers on Ed's desk, which turned out to be a portion of the 2,000 page appropriations bills.
Upon the realization of what had just happened, Josh picked up the pace and lead the kids further down the hallway before 15 preschoolers inadvertently learned some new four letter words. "That kid has to be a Republican... I can spot 'em a mile away," Josh quietly snarked to Donna.
Rounding the corner to cut through communications, the troupe encountered Toby, pacing in front of his office, squeezing a racquetball in his hand. He was just beginning the mental outline of the State of the Union.
"Hi, Uncle Toby!" Audrey exclaimed. "Whatcha' doin? Bangin' around?" She looked up at him with wide eyed adoration. The two had a special bond, and Toby showed a level of kindness and protection to Audrey that was otherwise rarely displayed.
"I am," he cleared his throat. "And just what are you doing?"
"Going to see the President," Audrey supplied. "This is my class," she stated, turning around to the 14 other preschoolers and the chaperones. "This is my Uncle Toby," she announced. "He writes words and eats pie."
"Communications Director," Josh amended in an aside to the adults.
"They're out of pie," Toby muttered.
"Is that why you're a grumpy bear?" Audrey asked.
Toby cleared his throat. "Perhaps."
Seemingly out of the blue, Toby felt a swift kick to the shin. "Ow," he stated in a monotone, glancing down to see a tiny scowl on a little boy in a red plaid button up. "And just what is your name," he asked, swiftly going into protector mode and readying himself to make a mental note to never let Audrey associate with this particular child.
"Jeffrey," the child retorted, sticking his tongue out when he was sure his teacher wasn't looking.
"Jeffrey what?" Toby straightened his tie.
"Jeffrey Allister Haffley the 4th," the child stated with an edge, almost daring Toby to react poorly.
"Of course," Toby stated with a sarcastic chuckle."Of course your name is Jeffrey Allister Haffley the 4th. You would be the one that kicked me in the shin. Unprovoked, I might add."
"Okay, well, let's get moving," Josh began ushering the group along once again.
"It's okay," Audrey assured Toby with a pat on the arm as they all filed out. "He bit me last week."
Toby immediately swooped in and lifted Audrey into his arms. "You stay over here," he instructed Jeffrey. "I will discuss the biting with both your teacher and your father later."
Upon their arrival in the outer office to The Oval, Audrey waved hello to Charlie, Toby letting her down only after Jeffrey was on the other side of the room. Charlie launched into his greeting, gratefully accepting the class' drawing and introducing himself to the class.
Toby stood near Josh, lowering his voice. "Jeffrey bit Audrey last week."
"Yeah, I know. It's not the first time," Josh was just as unamused with the situation as Toby, if not more so. He'd just had more time to come to terms with it.
"What are we going to do about this?"
"We?" Josh raised his eyebrows.
"It seems like there should be a, a, a punishment. Or a course of corrective action of some sort."
"Donna and I met with his mom on Tuesday."
"And?"
"And what? He's three and a half years old. They're working on it and the teachers are keeping Audrey separated from him."
"Do you want me to get into it?"
"Do I want you to get into it? What in the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"With Haffley," Toby began, staring at a point on the wall behind Josh. "I could have a word with him. It would keep it out of your office but still have a lasting impression." Toby shifted his weight.
"NO, I don't want you to GET INTO IT!"
The room turned to stare at the two men. "Sorry," Josh muttered, motioning for Charlie to continue speaking. "Toby, listen to me. Let it go. I appreciate it but let's not halt the President's legislative agenda to 'get into it' about which kids aren't getting along at preschool."
Toby, clearly not pleased with that response, straightened his tie. "The offer is always on the table."
"Thanks, Toby," Josh clapped his shoulder appreciatively as Charlie opened the door to The Oval.
The class filed in and stood in a line towards the back wall of the room as the President rounded his desk to lean on the front, removing his glasses to address the kids. "Good Morning!" he greeted.
"Good Morning, Mr. President," the class chorused in unison as they'd been instructed.
The President spoke briefly to the class about a very watered down version of his job as a few additional members of Senior Staff filed in to listen.
The connecting door to the Chief of Staff's office opened quietly to reveal Leo and Edith, her camera at the ready.
"Now," the President continued, "I'm sure that there are several of you in the room who have parents that work in the federal government in some capacity." It was the nature of the beast when you attended preschool in Georgetown, they supposed. "But Miss Lyman's father works for me, so that's part of what we're going to discuss today. Audrey, come on up here, please."
Audrey didn't waste any time making her way to stand next to President Bartlet, who popped her up to sit on the side of the Resolute Desk.
"Audrey's father is my Deputy Chief of Staff," the President continued. "But what does that mean, exactly?" President Bartlet was met with blank stares. "Audrey, do you know what it is that your father does here?"
She shrugs animatedly. She'd never really thought about it before, but she gave the most honest answer she could. "Whatever Donna tells him?"
That drew a hearty laugh from Sam and CJ, who were standing in the corner. Donna's smile widened and Josh just shook his head. He was never going to hear the end of that.
"Boy, I'll say," Leo remarked.
"Oh, Josh," President Bartlet chuckled. "I can't wait to tell Abbey about this."
"Yes, sir," Josh laughed too, his hand finding the small of Donna's back. But he had to admit, his daughter wasn't wrong about that.
"Well, while Audrey is right in a certain capacity," the President continued. "His job is also to help create laws. He works hard to make sure that everyone in this country, especially those of your generation, can be whatever they want to be. That you all have access to schools, and doctors and food to eat."
Most of the children turned their heads to stare at Josh again as the President paused briefly before resuming his speech, encouraging the preschool class to be involved in their communities. "Decisions are made by those who show up," he mused, more for the adults in the room. "And the 15 of you have already shown up, bringing along what I hear are finely crafted ornaments for our Christmas tree. The future is bright," he told him with a smile. "Now, let's get a photo."
The class crowded around in front of the President and the White House photographer snapped a few photos before Charlie lead the class back into the outer office to don their winter gear and head out to the National Christmas Tree.
"Hold on, Audrey," President Bartlet requested. "Let's get one more photo while your classmates find their coats. Josh, Donna, Leo," he gestured for the three to join them, President Bartlet sitting Audrey on his hip as Leo rest his hand proudly on the little girls back. Donna stood on the other side of the President as Josh wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close. The camera flashed several times before the President handed Audrey over to Josh.
He kissed her goodbye, sending her to meet up with the rest of her class, who were going to be escorted to the District of Columbia tree and back to their small bus by an usher.
"Have fun out there," Donna told Audrey, giving her a quick kiss.
"Bubbe will pick you up. I'll see you at home," Josh kissed her forehead. "Bye, Shortcake," he sat her down and she hurried off to join her class, pausing briefly in the doorway and waving goodbye with a tiny smile.
"Alright," the President's voice commanded. "What's next?"