Chapter three -
Clays pov:
As I walk back from Hannah's it makes me realise how lucky I am that she stopped herself from making that cut bigger than it was. If she didn't stop she wouldn't be here now, I wouldn't have my Hannah with me. I can't believe all the things she went through and I had no idea they were happening, I didn't pick up on the signs, how oblivious was I to this. I'm a few blocks away from Hannah's when I realise that I've stopped walking troubled by my thoughts of Hannah not being here and who would find her at home, would it have been her mom or dad, or would tony have got there to stop her if he listened to those tapes fast enough. When I look up to see where I am, I find myself standing near to Bryce's house, this angers me to another level. Thinking about what he did to her but not only to my Hannah, how many others has he done it to, I know Jessica's another from what Hannah told me earlier. Being in a close proximity to Bryce makes the anger inside of me boil into a new form of angry that I have never felt before. How could he do that to Hannah, my Hannah, what gave him the right, to other girls aswell. I have to quickly walk away before I do something I will or will not regret.
I'm a few blocks away from home when out the corner of my eye I spot a red Mustang coming up the road and without turning I already know who it is.
"Hey clay where you heading?" Tony asked.
"Just heading home from walking Hannah back" I replied.
Tony nodded " oh right I guess she told you then".
"Yeah" I say looking down at my feet feeling the sadness and anger rising back up.
"Jump in clay I'll take you home" Tony offered.
I nod and get in the car just as Tony pulls off I turn to him and ask.
"Do you still have the tapes that Hannah made".
"Yeah haven't got rid of them yet why?" Tony replied.
"I want to listen to them, I know she told me but I need to know more so I can help her" I reply back to him.
Tony looks slightly confused and apprehensive for a bit but then asks.
"Are you sure you want to do that clay?".
"I have to, I need to help her, I can't nearly lose her again Tony" I answer wiping a tear that has fallen down my cheeks.
"Ok clay let's got to my house and you can listen to them but I'm staying with you because I don't know how you will react to them" tony answers.
All I can do is nod. I text my mom to let her know I'm with Tony and will be staying over the night so she won't worry. I also need to text Hannah so as we pull up on Tony's drive I message her to tell her I'm home, how serious I am about what I had said and want to spend the day with her tomorrow. I know I shouldn't lie to her but I will tell her tomorrow what I was actually doing.
We stay at Tony's while I listen to the tapes. I'm almost finished the tapes and it is really late, I feel bad for keeping tony up but he says he's normally up this late anyway. Hearing my tape broke my heart listening to all the things she had to say about how she felt that night at the party. I sit there in tears while listening to my tape, it makes me realise how in love with her I actually am, I vow there and then that I will always show her this love and always make her feel special. I also hated that fact that Bryce's tape was after mine to the point it made me physically sick. Hearing what she had to say about what he was doing was gut wrenching, I will never let him touch her again. When I say this to tony he is in agreement with me, he's such a good friend I know he will look after her and me when we really need it, especially now with what he knows Hannah went through.
I've finally finished all of the tapes and I'm overwhelmed with emotions about how Hannah was treated. I look at the clock to see that it is half 2 in the morning, normally I would be asleep by now or at least trying to sleep. I take off the headphones and look at Tony not knowing what to say. Tony just nods at my expression.
"I can't believe she through all of that tony" I say deeply saddened.
"I know clay, I think we should both get some sleep now and you and Hannah can talk tomorrow ok I'll even drop you at Hannah's if you like" tony replies.
"Yeah thanks Tony" I say nodding.
We both go to bed with our emotions feeling heavy. I just hope I don't have a bad dream about Hannah after learning about all this stuff. Tony turns the light off and whispers.
"Night clay don't stress she's ok now".
"I know, night tony" I reply turning over to face the window.
I lie there for a while watching the trees sway before I eventually fall into a deep sleep where my Hannah awaits for me.