Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters within this story, they belong to Jay Asher.

Chapter twelve:

Today is the day. I woke up feeling complete dread. Today is the day I tell my story, my heart feels like it is going to beat out of my chest and I can feel myself starting to panic. I can't do that not today I need to be strong, well as strong as I can be. I look at my phone to see that it is 6:30 in the morning, i also have 3 messages, 3 missed calls and a voicemail from Jessica. Oh no! Does she know? I quietly leave Clay's room so i dont wake him up and head downstairs where i go and sit in the little conservatory area by the back door. I listen to the voicemails first.

'Hannah, please tell me this isn't true. Justin has just told me some things I didn't think I would ever hear.'

She's crying. It's so heartbreaking.

'Hannah, please call me ASAP? Please tell me this isn't true?'

'Hannah, please i need to talk to you, i need to understand what happened, why did this happen to me hannah? Why do I always get shit happening to or around me? Why did I deserve this?'

That was the last voicemail. I'm so heartbroken for her, i heard the pain in her voice, I need to call her once i've read her messages. I open up my messages.

Hannah, once you get this please call me.

HANNAH, this is URGENT!!!

Hannah, please i need you, i don't know what to do.

I instantly click on her name and call her, I know it's early but she needs it. She answers on the second ring.

Hannah?

Yeah Jess it's me.

Hannah, what happened? This can't be real. This can't be true. Please tell me what Justin said wasn't true? I got so upset and angry I shouted at him to leave the house she said getting more and more upset.

Jess, id rather not discuss this over the phone, plus i need to know what he said to you last night. I'm at Clay's house, come over i'm the only one awake at the minute. We can discuss it better then, plus I have something you may need to hear.

She paused for a minute.

Ok, I'm heading over now, i'll be 10 minutes tops.

Ok see you soon Jess.

I feel awful, I really do, but it is good that she knows now but i need to make sure she knows EVERYTHING. I wrote a note that I stick on the conservatory door to tell the others not to come in while me and Jess are talking. I get a box of tissues, i get the tape that i made about what happened, I make some coffee and just generally prepare myself as much as I can for Jess. Just as i put the coffees in the conservatory i see Lainie come into the kitchen and she gives me a small smile, it's comforting but also makes me emotional and i just burst into tears.

"Oh Hannah, todays going to be ok, we will get through it ok, we will do it together"

"It's not just that, Jess knows"

"WHAT. Jess knows what happened to her"

I nod back to her

"How does she know? Did you tell her?"

"No, Justin told her. She's on her way over to talk about it properly and I can talk about what happened to me too, I hope you don't mind?"

"Oh honey, no i don't mind i think it will be good for you both"

"Thank you. Also, do you think maybe after talking to her for about half an hour or so could you come in and maybe talk to her like you did with me and maybe Jess could join us with the lawyers and police today if she's up for it?"

"I think that should be ok, but let's talk to her first and then we can all decide together before getting the lawyers and police involved. Don't forget were going at 10 to the station, so you have a couple hours"

"I know, thank you so much lainie"

Jess arrives 5 minutes after my conversation with lainie finishes and by the way she looks she hasn't really slept in the past few hours.

"Hi Jess" i reach my arms out to hug her.

"Hi Hannah" she returns the hug half heartedly, which i can understand i didn't even want my parents touching me in any way after what happened to me.

"Come this way, we have a room to ourselves. It's only me and Mrs Jenson awake at the minute but she's in the kitchen so we'll be able to talk alone"

"Ok" she says sheepishly.

Shes quiet, i mean i don't blame her really, this is a lot to take in. We sit down in the conservatory with the door shut, I don't talk straight away since I know how uncomfortable this conversation will be so i let jess start it off once she's ready. It takes a while but i don't push her she needs to be able to do it in her own time.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner, it's been a couple of weeks near enough 3 months? Why did Justin have to tell me and not you?"

"Honestly Jess, I really wanted to but I just didn't know how to. How do you bring up that sort of conversation? How do you tell someone who you consider a really close friend or was a close friend that something like that happened to them?"

"I get that you would think that but don't you think i should of known especially since i've still been hanging around him"

"I really wish I could of told you before but I was scared that you wouldn't believe me and that it would somehow go around school that i was spreading lies about Bryce and what he did, and you know how fast it could of gone round the school" I say holding onto jess's hand.

It's hard to see her like this, crying and broken, it's just not her and this is what Bryce does and this is why he has to pay for what he has done.

"Oh Hannah why did he do this to me, what happened, I don't get how this could of happened?"

"I have a way for you to know or understand what I witnessed that night, but before that i need you to know something and the reason why i was in your room that night, kind of hidden out of sight."

"Ok, i didn't realise you were in the actual room i just know Justin said he saw you come downstairs after Bryce did"

"I was in their with clay, we went up there to talk as the party was really loud. We went into your room and talked about your rock collection and then we started kissing and making out but I freaked out and shouted at him to leave and he did, now the reason why I freaked out is because of all of the boys who sexually degrade us and those who have made me uncomfortable and it all just built up in my head and I freaked out on Clay" i say taking in a deep breath.

"So after Clay left you were left in my room when me and Justin came in, is that what happened?"

"Yes, now this is the part where you need to listen to the tape on the table next to you, now the reason that is there is because i ……. because i tried to do something stupid but i stopped myself. This was part of that but we can talk about that another time"

Jess looks next to her and sees the tape in the old walkman, she picks it up and turns it on. I hold her hand through the whole tape. I can tell when it gets to the part about bryce because her tears flow faster down her face and she looks like she can't breathe. By the time she finishes the tape she is practically doubled over on the floor completely broken and distressed.

"I'm so sorry Jess i really am. I wanted to stop it but i couldnt i was frozen in place and I was petrified of what would happen if i was caught but I felt so devastated that this was happening and i couldn't help you"

"Why didn't Justin stop him?"

"Bryce locked the door he couldn't get in and i think he was hurt and scared too but also Bryce pushed him out the door when he did try that's why he locked the door"

"I'm angry at Justin for not trying to stop it more but i can understand how he feels bad that he didn't, I still love him but its just going to be difficult for the next few weeks or so. I might not talk to him for a while but i think he'd understand"

"I think he will Jess, i'm sorry you had to find out the way you did but now i need to tell you something"

I tell her about bryce and what he did to me, everything else in between and everything after till today. Her face is unreadable, she's shocked that's 100%. It takes her a while to respond back to what I

told her.

"I can't believe he did that to you, he's a sick pervert. I'm sort of mad at you for wanting to end it all and leave all of us here, people who love you but I can understand why you would want to. The way the girls get treated in our school is disgusting. Something should change around that place to stop things like this from happening"

"I agree Jess, but what do we do?"

Just as I finish that question Lainie pops her head around the door.

"Everything ok in her girls?"

"I guess you could say that Mrs Jenson" Jess replies.

"Oh please call me Lainie. Would now be a good time to tell Jess about what's happening with us today Hannah?" She calls out to me.

"Yeah sure" Jess looks at me confused. "Today is the day where I speak to the lawyers that Lainie works with about Bryce and what he has done and also talk to the police" I explain.

"Oh right" Jess says quietly.

Lainie comes in and sits on a chair next to me and Jess. She starts to explain to Jess about what will happen with the police and lawyers and in what direction this whole situation will take. She also mentions that if Jess wanted to join the lawsuit that will be put towards Bryce she can since she is not the only one and surely we're both not alone too.

"Now you don't have to join us as I know this is a really painful and upsetting subject but if you do your welcome to come with us at 10 don't to make our statements and I can be present in the room with both of you as a stand in lawyer so to speak for your statements but when this moves forward it will be passed on to a colleague of mine as I'm "emotionally involved" since I know both of you and Hannah practically lives here, but we have the best team possible and you will have the best lawyers in the city. That is a lot to take in so I'm going to leave you girls to it for a little bit but Jess if you decide to please let me know by 9ish the latest ok so I can get the wheels in motion so to speak"

With that she left the room and me and Jess sit for a while in silence.

Clays pov:

I wake to the smell of freshly made coffee which is always a nice start to the day but when I roll over Hannah isn't there. She stayed last night so where could she be. I throw on some joggers and a top from my closet and head down the stairs. No one is in the living room but there's mumbling towards the back of the house, maybe it's my mom and dad, either way I need some coffee and to find Hannah. I walk into the kitchen and see mom sitting at the table drinking coffee.

"Morning sweetie"

"Morning mom, have you seen Hannah?"

"Yes she's in the conservatory but she's with Jess so I'd leave her be for a while"

"Oh shit, does she know?"

"Yes Jess knows and watch your language please" she protests.

"Sorry"

"Your forgiven, would you like to help me make some breakfast I'm sure the girls would like some once they finish up in that room and your father will be awake soon"

"Yeah sure"

With that we start to cook a full breakfast. Toast, eggs, bacon, sausage, waffles, hash brown fingers, french toast and pancakes. You name it and it was probably there. By the time we finish making breakfast, it has took us around 45 minutes and I'm starving. Mom knocks on the conservatory door and must of told them about food as 5 minutes later the girls come out. It's obvious both have been crying and who can really blame them really. Jess whispers something to Hannah and she nods slightly before they sit down.

"Good morning girls"

"Morning Clay" Hannah says with a small smile.

"Hey Clay" Jess says distantly.

I don't bother to ask about their conversation as it is none of my business and they need each other more than me right now. Hannah clears her throat after she's eaten a little bit a food.

"Lainie, I think Jess has made up her mind about the decision we discussed earlier"

"Have you Jess?" Mom says holding her hand out to hold Jess's.

"Yyyy.. yes. I think I want to help Hannah, bbb.. but I also want him to pay for what hhhh.. he did to us both" Shes starting to cry again. "I will join your lawsuit against him"