Part 6

Janeway searched a few other planets trying to find Seven, without any luck. It was as if the former Borg had just vanished. She was shocked that even Tuvok did not appear to know where she had gone. She couldn't help but wonder if he knew more than he let on. She couldn't put her finger on it, but her gut told her he was holding something back.

Perhaps Seven didn't want to be found, well, at least by her anyway. I really messed up, Janeway thought, her chest tightening as she boarded the ship that would take her back home. She had spent months on the lecture circuit, well, officially anyway, and it was time to get back to actually being an Admiral. She just wished she wasn't going home empty handed. She hated to give up her quest, but what choice did she have? If Seven didn't want to be found, then there was nothing she could do.

Ignoring the tiny tear that slipped from her eye, Kathryn finally allowed herself to mourn the loss of her friend. It wasn't the loss of the friendship she was grieving, but she was not about to admit that Seven was more than a friend.

…

Seven was thriving on Betazed. Not only did she fit right in with the people there, she also enjoyed the beautiful scenery. She had adapted to her new position at the Stellar Drive Institute, where she continued to work on her slip stream. It kept her busy, and her work was challenging, yet she had plenty of time to spend with Selene.

She enjoyed everything about living on Betazed, however, she still had that constant ache in her chest. It wasn't just about missing and longing for Kathryn, which she did. No, this was a gnawing, nagging reminder that she needed to tell Kathryn about Selene. Every day she saw more and more of Kathryn in their daughter, especially when Selene would smile that smile that was so much like her other mother's.

Finally, her time on Betazed was coming to an end, and it was time for Seven to make a choice to either accept her next assignment as a Lieutenant or terminate her career with Starfleet for good.

She gathered Selene in her arms as she pondered her options. She glanced over the clear blue waters of Betazed, and even though she liked it there, she really missed being out among the stars in space.

"I guess it's time," she said out loud, as Selene tightly grasped her hair and yanked on it.

"I suppose that means you agree," she smiled, and Selene only cooed back.

Days turned into months as Seven excelled in her position, and it wasn't long before she was promoted. She barely noticed, nor did she really even care, her attention was focused solely on her daughter. Selene was getting bigger, and her blonde hair had grown, and more and more seemed to glitter with a hint of strawberry. Selene was quite popular with the crew, who would flock to her every time she was around. Seven was both annoyed and honored by it. Whenever someone would inquire about Selene's father, she would just smirk and tell them she was the father, however, internally it would trigger that nagging guilt in the pit of her stomach. It would shut them up, but that didn't stop the whispers about who she was with, and that whoever it was, gave Selene really good genes. It would make her smile, but only for a few seconds before that ugly head called guilt came rearing back.

Seven gathered Selene in her arms as she left the mess hall and headed for her quarters.

"Commander," Aira greeted, but her eyes instantly landed on Selene. "Hey cutie," she made a face and took hold of one of her pudgy hands. "Gosh she is so adorable. Seriously …and seriously if you ever need a babysitter, you know I am here for you…right?"

Aira was in operations and it seemed she would suck up to Seven every chance she got, which irked Seven to no end. "Yes I know, you remind me every chance you get."

"Sorry Commander, I was just wanting to let you know."

Seven quietly took a breath. She was feeling more and more on edge these days, and she knew she had to do something to expel her guilt or she was going to come unhinged and take it out on the crew. "I know, and I will keep you in mind."

Once she made it to her quarters she went right for the computer and began to write Kathryn a letter, telling her that she it was imperative that they meet as soon as possible and that she would be having shore leave soon. She paused and reread what she had written and realized that it sounded so….well, it sounded so Borg. She would have to rewrite it before sending it off, but wasn't sure how to adequately express herself. She wanted to speak from her heart, but it still felt so broken even after all these months apart. She decided to try again later, and began to sort through her junk mail when she noticed the latest edition of the Starfleet gossip rag.

Opening it, she skimmed through the bylines, and right away one caught her attention. Admiral Kathryn Janeway was photographed with one Miles Randolf….Dr. Miles Randolf III the be precise. Apparently they had been spotted out and about together, time and time again. It was the first time she had seen Kathryn since Voyager returned, and even though it was just an image, she felt the impact of seeing her looking so beautiful….and so happy. She finally managed to tear her eyes away from the picture to read the article, but abruptly stopped when she read that an engagement announcement was surely imminent.

Slamming off the computer, Seven stood and gathered in air as fast her nanoprobes would allow. She closed her eyes as she tried to calm herself. Her anger began to quickly dissipate as she reminded herself that this was inevitable. She had no claim to Kathryn….in fact, she never really did. She very vividly recalled Kathryn telling her that what they had shared was a mistake, and when all was said at done, by the time she left Voyager they weren't really even friends.

The door sounded, pushing away all thoughts of Kathryn…..contacting her and telling her about Selene. The photo of her and that man she was dating haunted her, and she was determined that she would never feel guilty about not telling Kathryn about their daughter.

Seven opened the door, uncharacteristically forgetting to ask who was there. She had forgotten that Special Agent Shupe was coming by so they could eat dinner together. They had started a relationship, and although Seven liked her a lot, there was just one little hitch that had held her back. Now, however, she was more determined than ever that she just needed to move on.

"Good evening, Rukiya."

Agent Shupe greeted her with a light kiss to her lips. "Are you ready to grab something to eat?"

Seven groaned. "I'm sorry, I forgot we had plans, and I already ate in the mess hall."

Agent Rukiya Shupe was aboard the USS Caliber as part of its security team, and Seven had gravitated toward her as soon as they met. She was a fierce, confident woman, despite the fact she only stood at 1.65 meters. Her fiery red hair and exceptional good looks made her stand out, not just with the men on board, but the entire crew. Everyone she encountered found her attractive and appealing.

Rukiya just slid in even closer, easing one hand on Seven's hip and gently placing the other above Seven's hand, which was resting on the small of Selene's back. "I guess you'll have to make it up to me later," she winked cockily.

Seven knew what Rukiya was referring too. Living on Betazed for almost nine months had taught her a lot. "Oh?" she teased. "I suppose I could prepare you a meal if you'd like," she replied nonchalantly.

That made Rukiya smile. "Oh, I bet you can Seven, and I want it," she said with a humorous growl, and moved her hand around and lightly rubbed the top of Seven's ass.

The two had done nothing more than exchange a few kisses. Seven was quite aware that Rukiya wanted more, but she just couldn't take that next step, even though her brain told her she should.

Seven didn't even flinch, she just held the other woman's gaze. She was about to lean in and make the first move when Selene squealed, immediately breaking the two apart.

"Sorry," Seven breathed. "She has been in a mood all day."

Rukiya noticed that the little one in Seven's arms looked flushed, and she gently placed a hand to the girl's forehead. "She's a little warm."

Seven nodded. "I am aware. I believe she is teething."

Rukiya smiled and then went to the replicator. "Ice pop, lime," she said firmly. Once she received it, she pulled the wrapper off and offered a taste to Selene, who immediately clawed at the icy treat, causing the sticky remains to slip over Rukiya's hand that was now covering Seven's.

They both just watched and laughed.

"Thank you," Seven said softly. "Even though I am opposed to her eating such sugary foods."

"Oh, but look at her, she is already feeling better."

Seven couldn't deny it; she was very much enjoying herself. "I agree," she sighed shaking her head, yet had a tinge of a smile on her lips.

"So why don't I take her and let her finish this, and you go change into something more comfortable, and we just stay in tonight."

After a beat, Seven nodded and let Rukiya take Selene into her arms. The young woman immediately held her, comforting her and talking to her like they were best friends. Seven watched them venture off toward the couch, her heart swelling with a contentment she hadn't felt in a very long time. Maybe she could finally move on from Kathryn and make a life with someone else…maybe.

….

Admiral Janeway rolled her eyes. Not literally, but more to herself as her date rambled on and on about some inane nonsense she couldn't care less about. She hadn't minded dating him before. Actually it was more like she tolerated his company, but now he was starting to really annoy her. She found just about everything about him irritating, and couldn't help but pick the poor man apart. The way he continued to lick his teeth, the obnoxious sound he made when he cleared his throat, how loud he breathed. Not to mention how he apparently very much enjoyed looking at himself in the mirror. Yep, everything about him just annoyed the hell out of her.

Kathryn had been set up with him, and as first dates went, it was fine. She'd certainly had worse. She had never once let him inside her home, they had only exchanged a few kisses on the porch. She knew she couldn't keep putting him off and telling him she wanted to take it slow. Seriously, how much more glacial could they be? She needed to tell him that their relationship had run its course and that it was over. They were never going to be that couple that every headline in the gossip columns said they were.

The truth was, her heart belonged to someone else, and only to her. Even if she tried to forget and move on with some so called Mr. Right….there would never be anything right about it. It would only be a poor substitute for what and who she really wanted, and she knew it.

"Miles," her voice grated. "We need to talk."

His forehead scrunched as he gave her an odd look. "Aren't we talking now?"

"Um…we….you are talking, and I'm…..well….honestly, I'm only half listening to you."

Stunned, Miles flinched back as if he had been slapped. "What?" He took a moment to count to ten before clearing his facial features. "What's going on, Katie?"

Janeway groaned and this time she really did roll her eyes. "You know I hate it when you call me that."

"Okay. Is that what this is about?"

"No, this is about us," she sighed.

Miles' face went blank, then his eyes slipped shut for an instant. He gathered a breath when he reopened them. "What you really mean to say is that there is no us. Am I right?"

Kathryn's lips thinned. "I'm sorry. I tried."

His eyebrow slightly lifted. "Did you really? Because I honestly don't think you did. I think there is something that's been holding you back. I thought it might be something going on at work, or because you were away for so long. But now I'm starting to think it isn't something, but someone."

Janeway paused as she bit on the inside of her lip, then inhaled. "Maybe, but I need to stop pretending with you. It is not fair to you, and even more it is not fair to me."

Miles took a moment and let it sink in, then he quietly stood up. Setting his napkin on the table, he came around and placed a soft kiss to her cheek. "I hope he is everything you need."

Janeway didn't even watch him leave, she just stared at her uneaten food. "She is. She has always been," she said softly.