Eddie woke up the next morning, her body stiff and achy, and it took her a moment to realize she had fallen asleep on her bathroom floor. As if that were her rock bottom, she knew she had to pull herself together.
This was not her life, not anymore. She refused to live in fear of Jake Singer for another day. She left that life behind when she left California, and by the grace of God when she met Jamie Reagan. She was blessed that Jamie and Gracie came into her life and she wasn't going to let anything take them away from her.
She had no idea what brought on these recent mental relapses, but it was time for her to take control of her life again. She wasn't going to be Jake's victim anymore.
She managed to pull herself together after that, but when Jamie invited her to stay in Staten Island with him and Gracie for the rest of the week, she gratefully accepted his offer. She would do that when their work schedules coincided, and Gracie loved having her there too.
Eddie hoped that avoiding her apartment for the next few days would help her forget about the smell, and forget about seeing Jake's face outside the diner. Even though she knew none of it was real, it couldn't be, a little separation could be just what she needed. She knew she would have to go back to her apartment at some point, though.
Jake knew his presence in her apartment had disturbed her. He could see fear all over her face when she pulled the curtains closed that night. He hadn't intended to leave any indication he had been there that day, but he could tell by her body language as he watched her through the window that she knew someone had been there, and it backfired on him.
He watched her leave for work the next morning and now it has been three days and she hasn't returned. The last thing he wanted to do was push her further away from him.
He assumed that she had been staying at her boyfriend's house, and he didn't know where that was, and now he couldn't watch her. His frustration multiplied with every day that she didn't return, and he had to find out where Jamie lived.
After a cozy week of playing house with Jamie and Gracie, Eddie knew she needed to go back to her apartment. It was easy to forget about the strange feelings she was having, tucked away on Staten Island for the last four days, but she had to go back to her apartment and face the demons that had haunted her mind recently.
Friday morning Jamie and Eddie walked side by side to work, just as they had done every other day that week. He would kiss her goodbye at the steps of her office building before going to his precinct, and they would meet at the ferry to go back to Staten Island together in the evenings. It was a routine that they both found very comfortable and they both knew they were ready for this to be their forever.
"I need to go back to my apartment tonight," Eddie says reluctantly to Jamie as they approach her office.
He nods in response. He understands. She does have other responsibilities, he knows that, but he wishes she would just stay with him forever. He wants to ask her to marry him soon. He has been thinking about it a lot. He just isn't sure exactly when or how to do it, but the thought is at the forefront of his mind on a regular basis lately.
"If you don't mind, I think I'm going to meet Danny for a couple of drinks tonight," he says, but it sounds more like a question, as they reach the front of her building.
His parents were keeping Gracie overnight, and his brother had been bugging him for three weeks to have a beer.
"Course not," she says, laughing to herself.
It sounds like he is asking for her permission, and she thinks it is cute. Not that he ever needs it.
"Come over after if you want," she says as she smiles and leans into him for a goodbye kiss.
He captures her lips gently and then pulls away.
"I'll be there," and then he can't help but lean in for another doting kiss before he leaves her for the rest of the day.
Eddie passes Erin's office on the way to her own, offering her a quick good morning as she continues down the hall.
"Hey," Erin shouts from her doorway, prompting Eddie to pause and look back over her shoulder.
"We're still on for lunch today, right," Erin asks swiftly, knowing Eddie is in a hurry.
"Yeah, for sure. I'll call you on my way back from court."
Eddie offers a brief smile and waves towards her boss as she rushes off.
"Great, see you later," Erin says as she ducks back into her office.
They meet for lunch at the diner down the street, which had quickly become their regular spot shortly after they started working together. The waitress confirms they will both be having their regular as they walk in the door, and their meals are delivered to them quickly.
"So, are you excited about the big charity gala next weekend," Erin asks, as she reaches for her water.
Eddie isn't sure what she is talking about and scrunches her eyebrows in confusion, worrying that she missed some big invitation from her office. Erin doesn't notice as she continues to ramble in between bites of her turkey club.
"I can't believe my brother didn't tell me he was receiving an award from the commissioner this year. If it weren't for my friend over at the PC's office, I would have never known. You could have told me too, you know," she finishes, pointing her fork at Eddie, but she is smiling.
"What are you talking about," Eddie asks, looking up at her.
She has completely forgotten her lunch at this point and needs Erin to elaborate. When she sees Eddie's face, Erin realizes she isn't the only one her brother hasn't told, and she is really curious why.
"The New York Police Foundation has this annual charity gala, and every year they recognize certain members of the community, and the police commissioner awards certain members of the NYPD for exemplary service," Erin finishes.
She can see a little bit of hurt in Eddie's face, and she is kind of pissed at her brother now.
"And Jamie is getting an award?" Eddie questions, trying to figure out why he wouldn't have said anything to her about it.
"Apparently so," Erin says, feeling bad for her friend now.
"And it's next weekend?"
There is sadness in Eddie's voice that Erin doesn't miss as she looks away from her friend and makes a mental note to call her brother and scold him about it later.
Eddie is concerned about why Jamie didn't tell her, and she can't help but think maybe he just didn't plan on taking her. Either way, her feelings were genuinely hurt.
She wants to call him and ask him about it now but decides it will be better to have the conversation in person, and she will see him later tonight, so she will ask him then.
Jake spent the latter part of the afternoon lurking around Eddie's office building. He was hoping to see her leave at the end of the day so he could follow her to Jamie's. He assumed that is where she had been staying the last few days, and he needed to know exactly where that was. He couldn't, or wouldn't, go another three days without seeing her.
He watched from across the street as Eddie and Erin walked out of their office together, and Jamie was nowhere in sight. That made him happy, but he could see an emotion in Eddie's face that intrigued him.
He was too far away to hear what they were saying, or even attempt to read their lips, but he hoped the frustration he could see all over her face was caused by her boyfriend. He moved in closer, still maintaining a safe distance out of her sight for now, and he watched them go in separate directions.
His plan to follow Eddie to Jamie's house didn't work when he realized he was just following her back to her apartment. He was okay with that, even though he was still curious where her boyfriend lived.
He watched her walk inside her building, and he went back to his hotel room. He thought he might confront her today, but he would wait until the sun went down, unless her pesky boyfriend showed up again.
Eddie steps into her apartment for the first time since Monday. She is relieved when there are no frighteningly familiar smells, although it is a little stagnant inside. She walks through the room, drawing the curtains and blinds and raising the window to allow the stagnant air to flow out and fresh air in.
Jake is especially grateful for that. He can see into her living room now. He watches her push the window up and his suspicions from earlier are confirmed. He knows that face, and the body language when she plops down on her couch. He remembers it very well.
"Oh, he did something to piss you off, didn't he?"
Jake speaks as if she can hear him, and smiles to himself.
Eddie is sitting on her couch, her arms crossed over her chest, brooding, as she thinks about calling Jamie. She isn't sure she can wait until after he meets Danny. She doesn't have to think about it long, though when she hears the key turn inside her doorknob. Jamie announces himself as he pushes the door open and she greets him with an angry glare as she stands.
"What are you doing here," she snaps.
She didn't mean to, but she is angry and hurt and it just happened. He doesn't miss her snide tone and it confuses him. He holds his hands up in defense, wondering where this is coming from.
"Meeting Danny down the street, figured I'd hang out with you until he gets off, is that not okay?" he says, his hand still raised.
His eyebrows are scrunched in confusion as he takes a step towards her.
"No, that is ok!"..."What's not ok, is…," she pauses, but her hands fly out from her sides, and from across the street, Jake is certain they are fighting.
"What's not ok, is you're getting an award at some fancy event next weekend and you didn't tell me. Why didn't you tell me?"
She isn't trying to yell, but her voice is rising on its own and Jamie is taken by surprise. He didn't tell anyone about the award and had honestly forgotten about it.
"How do you even know about that," his defensive response is reactionary, and he wishes he could take it back.
"Your sister," she yells as she starts to walk away from him.
Jake is still watching from across the street as she goes into the bedroom, and Jamie follows her.
"Oh no, no, no, don't go in there, I can't see you in there. Dammit!" Jake shouts as he slams his palms down on the window ledge. He keeps watching though, hoping they come back into his view soon.
"Eddie, listen, please," Jamie says as he enters her room behind her, and she spins around on her heels to face him.
"How do you think it felt to find out from your sister? I felt like an idiot when she realized I had no idea what she was talking about. Why wouldn't you tell me about it?"
Her voice is calmer now, and Jamie hears her tone change from angry to sad, really quick. She begins to take her suit jacket off, she still hasn't changed from her work clothes, and her heightened emotions are causing her to perspire.
Jamie reaches out to help her, sliding the jacket off her shoulders, and she lets him.
"It hurt my feelings Jamie," she says softly, genuinely upset.
He lays her jacket on the dresser beside them and turns her around to face him. He reaches his hands out to her and she lets him wrap his fingers around hers.
"I'm sorry," he says softly. "I didn't say anything about it because I'm not going. I don't even know how Erin found out about it."
Now Eddie is even more confused.
"What, why wouldn't you go," she asks him sincerely.
"I don't do this job for the awards and recognitions, especially at big flashy charity galas like this one. It's just not my thing. I promise I wasn't trying to hide it from you, it's just not a big deal to me, and I honestly forgot about it."
That isn't the full truth, but he hopes it is enough. He truly didn't plan on going to the ceremony and trashed the letter after he received it.
Eddie can't stay angry with him, she never has been able to, and if she is honest, she never really was. She was caught by surprise, and her feelings were hurt, but she was never mad.
"I'm sorry I snapped at you," she admits softly, and she is somewhat embarrassed at her own behavior.
He lets go of her fingers and slides his arms around her waist, pulling her close, and her palms land softly on his chest.
"Will you forgive me," she asks, and the sweet kiss he gives her is her answer.
After a few seconds, Eddie pulls away, and her hands glide from his chest, over his shoulders and land around his neck as she looks into his eyes.
"So what award are you getting," she asks, smiling up at him, and he rolls his eyes at her and laughs.
"Seriously," she tells him with a little twitch in her eyebrows, and he knows he is not getting out of it.
"The Hemmerdinger Award," he says, and he laughs at the adorable face she is making because she has no idea what that is.
She arches her eyebrows distinctly now, asking him for a better explanation. He still has his hands around her waist, and he is softly swaying their bodies side to side as he answers her.
"Excellence for Distinguished Public Service," he explains.
"Jamie, that is amazing," she exclaims.
"You should really think about going. That is a huge honor, and you deserve it," she says, but he is shaking his head no at her.
"Well, I'm proud of you whether you go or not," she tells him as she leans in for another kiss.
Jamie pulls away first. He knows if they don't stop, he will cancel his plans with his brother and join her for a lazy night in, which is what he really wants to do anyway.
He can't seem to stop his hands from roaming her waist though, and she is not about to step out of his embrace. It feels too good. She loves the way his hands feel on her body and for a moment she thinks about asking him to stay in with her tonight, but she is not that girl.
She knows he would if she asked, but she also knows he would never hear the end of it from his brother. Still, she is not going to rush this moment away.
"You want to come with me," he asks.
He knows if she does, it will piss Danny off, but he doesn't care. He can't get enough of the woman in his arms.
"We could kick Danny's ass at darts again," he says as he smiles at her.
His hands are peaking underneath her blouse, caressing the soft silk skin there and she slides her hands from his chest back around his shoulders as she smiles back.
"I think I'm going to stay in tonight," she says, and she scrunches her nose at the disappointment she causes in his face.
"I am going to take a long, hot, bubble bath," she says slowly, and Jamie moans at the image of her in that tub, and it is not making his decision to leave any easier right now.
"Go have fun with your brother," she says as she pushes him out the door of her bedroom.
He really wishes he never would have made those plans now.
"I'll see you later," she tells him as she shuts the bathroom door behind her.
Jake was waiting impatiently for them to return to the living room so he could see again. It was a few minutes later when Jamie finally emerged from Eddie's bedroom alone. Jake watched Jamie walk out the door of Eddie's apartment by himself.
That was unusual, this must mean they were still fighting, he thought to himself, and he was oddly curious what it was about. He sprinted out of his room and out the front door of his hotel and was fortunate enough to spot Jamie just as he was leaving her building.
Jake looked up towards her window and thought he could go up there now, but then decided to follow Jamie instead. The streets were so crowded in the city that it was easy to remain unseen, and Jamie wouldn't know who he was even if he did see him.
Jake needed answers. He needed to know what they were fighting about, maybe this was his chance to move in on Eddie, to rescue her, but he needed to know more about Jamie first, and he needed to know if Jamie was coming back tonight before he went to Eddie's apartment.