A/N: How's it going all you wonderful Star vs. fans out there! So, like it said in the story description, this is a one-shot challenge for a conversation between Star and Marco after the events of "Booth Buddies." LordCornwalis, of "In the Pale Starlight" and "Once and Future Queen" fame, sent me this challenge and then sweetened the deal by saying he'd do a one-shot of his own! Head on over to his profile and take a look at his latest work "To Tell the Truth" when you're done here. Without further ado…. Let's begin.
Text in quotation marks will be dialogue between characters, text in italics will be inner thoughts.
Chapter 9: We need to talk
Darkness. All around Marco there was nothing but darkness. He didn't remember how he got here, or even where here was. There were no discernable landmarks, no stars to guide him, and as far as he could tell, not a soul around. Then again, his vision had been limited to maybe 2 feet or so in front of him, for all he knew he could have been in a crowded city in the middle of a blackout and was about to walk straight into a building or something. Come to think of it, without any natural or artificial light, how could he see anything? Spinning slowly in a circle and concentrating, Marco came to realize that there was light coming from somewhere, from everywhere in fact. It had a red tint to it that somehow seemed familiar to Marco, but he couldn't quite place his finger on it. It was as if the darkness surrounding him had muted the light, making it weak and difficult to see. Whatever this place was, it was giving him the creeps. Marco reached into his hoodie pocket expecting to find the familiar and comforting handle of his dimensional scissors and the quick escape back to his room on Mewni they provided only to groan in exasperation when his hand clenched around nothing but some pocket lint. Great, scissors are gone and still no clue where I am. Well, no use standing around here, I guess. Sighing in resignation, Marco set out in a random direction, hoping to bump into someone or something that could tell him how to get home.
Marco had only been walking for a short time when he thought he started to hear voices. Like the light however, they were difficult to make any sense of, fleeting and whispered. What little Marco was able to catch didn't make much sense, it sounded like he was picking up bits and pieces of hundreds of conversations instead of one coherent one, even though the two voices, one man and one woman he'd been able to deduce, remained the sole source of the sound. Stopping in his tracks, Marco decided to close his eyes, and make his breathing as shallow as possible, hoping that limiting some of his senses would give him a temporary boost to another. Straining his ears, the conversations became slightly clearer, yes and that woman's voice sounded so familiar now… where had he heard it before?
"We…. kissed." Marco had heard that before, but where?
"You're my squire." Yes, he was a squire on Mewni. For his best friend, in fact. And… and something more if he was being honest with himself.
"I have a boyfriend; his name is Tom!" Marco's eyes snapped open in recognition…Star! He was hearing their conversation from the photo booth the other day! When they'd…. when he had…. Marco shook his head, no time to focus on that now, he had to find Star, she could get him home!
"Star! STAR!" Marco called out into the blackness, receiving no response. Undeterred, Marco began running towards where he thought the sound had come from, more snippets of conversation assaulting him from all sides.
"I don't need a hero… I need a friend."
"I do have a crush on you!"
"Now go up there and be with your girlfriend!"
"A lot has changed in my life since you left Marco."
"I hereby declare that you, Marco Ubaldo Diaz, shall henceforth be my royal squire…but most importantly to be my very best friend so long as we both shall live, Amen."
Marco pumped his legs faster, the thought of finding Star and getting out of here now all consuming. Suddenly, he spotted a light up ahead and sprinted towards it, thinking salvation was at last at hand! Bursting through the door shaped hole of light, Marco was equal parts disappointed and stunned to find himself, not on Mewni, but what looked like an ancient temple with an intricate mosaic in the middle. Above him was a dome with a hole in the center and shining through that was the blood moon, it's light pink and sickly rather than the usual deep crimson Marco was used to seeing. Marco stepped towards the light as if drawn to it, yet when he was fully immersed in the moonbeam, he felt not the normal warm comfort he'd expected but instead a profound sense of loneliness and despair washed over him.
He looked up at the celestial body with growing trepidation. "What do you want from me? Why am I here?!" No reply greeted him. Of course, I'm yelling at the moon for god's sake! I must really be losing it in here. He tried turning back around the way he came in only to find the doorway gone. When he turned back around, he was relieved to find Star standing there looking at him, a warm smile gracing her face.
"Star! Oh man, thank corn you're here! Where are we anyway? Doesn't matter, can you maybe portal us a way back to the castle? This place is creeping me out." To Marco's growing concern, Star didn't answer him, but instead started skipping towards him, smile still there and arms out as if expecting a hug. Instinct kicking in, Marco extended his arms in return, but when Star reached him instead of the warm familiar scent of Star's hair that always tickled his nose when they hugged, he felt nothing. Star had somehow passed right through him, as if she wasn't there…or as if he wasn't. Spinning round once more, Marco's heart broke at an all too familiar sight, Star and Tom locked together tightly, arms wrapped around one another and lips mashing feverishly against one another. Star still hadn't acknowledged his existence, even as he again called out her name. The couple finally separated for air, a heavy blush covering both of their cheeks. They both turned as if seeing Marco for the first time.
"Oh, hey Marco! Sorry bout that, just had to say hi to my boo, you know?" Star chirped happily.
Tom chimed in, "We're about to go get corn shakes. We'd invite you to come but… you know, it's sort of a couple's thing. Wouldn't want you to get stuck as a third wheel again am I right?"
Tom's words struck Marco to the core and he had to fight back the tears that were now welling up in his eyes. "Star could you at least tell me where we are or how to get home, I'm so lost right now, please just tell me where to go. I need my best fri…"
"Sorry Marco no time!" Star had wrapped herself around one of Tom's arms and they were walking away from him. "Gotta go! We'll talk soon ok?" The two strolled into the shadows and Marco quickly lost sight of them. Marco remained rooted to the spot, fear and pain keeping his stuck in place. Marco kept calling out to her, hoping she would come back, even as the shadows continued closing in, forming a tighter and tighter circle around Marco's increasingly small island of red moonlight.
Marco was panicking now. Why had Star abandoned him like this? What had happened to them? What was going on?! "Star! Star please I need you! You're my best friend remember? Don't leave me here! I'm…I'm afraid. I'm so confused and afraid." The shadows consumed the last traces of moonlight, casting Marco into darkness, still pleading.
"Please Star…please come back. Star…STAR!"
"STAR!" Marco screamed, opening his eyes and taking massive, gulping breaths, trying to orient himself. Rubbing his eyes, he saw he was in his room…back on earth? No, the recreation of his room in Butterfly Castle on Mewni. He tried to rub the heels of his hands into his forehead to rouse himself to wakefulness only to pull back in disgust feeling the front of his face absolutely soaked in sweat. A quick check of his pajama tops reveled similar results. Not exactly a surprise, Marco mused to himself, that was one intense dream after all. He gave an involuntary shudder as the images from last night came back to the fore unbidden.
Deciding to face the day, Marco rose from the bed and quickly shed the dirty garments, searching in his closet for his karate gi. An early morning stretch and kata workout had become part of his normal routine followed by a shower and breakfast before spending the day with Star…usually. As he slipped the familiar white cotton clothes on and tied his red sash around his waist, he remembered that it had been almost two days since he'd actually seen the young princess. Not since the…since the photo booth. After their awkward parting from Foolduke and Ruberiot's wedding, Marco had taken Kelly home on Nachos while Star had left…with Tom. Marco hadn't slept well that night and awoke fairly early the next morning to a text message from Star saying he had the day off and that she would be visiting Pony Head in the cloud kingdom all day. Marco had ended up spending the day training and walking through the village surrounding Butterfly castle, figuring Star would probably text him that night to grab dinner or have nachos or maybe check out another interdimensional club; she was still looking for a permanent replacement for the Bounce Lounge after all. No such luck. In fact, Marco remembered now, he had fallen asleep waiting for her. You could have just gone looking for her instead idiot, he berated himself, heading through the castle corridors down to a courtyard he enjoyed doing his routine in. But no, you just had to act like a Marco…again… and not go looking for Star when there was something you really needed to talk about with her like, oh I don't know…kissing her in a photo booth and practically confessing you still have really strong feelings for her which is why you've felt like it's so awkward lately. Might have been worth discussing. Sighing in frustration, Marco tried to focus on anything other than his frustration, inhaling and exhaling deeply, centering himself and bowing to an invisible partner before starting his exercises. I really can't keep going like this. I'll make sure I talk to her this afternoon.
Meanwhile in another part of Butterfly castle, said princess was also waking up, not plastered in sweat like her best friend but instead with the dark circles surrounding her eyes indicating that her slumber had been anything but restful. Cracking one eye open and staring at her nightstand, Star's vision quickly lighted upon the source of her frustration, the thin list of photographs staring back at her mockingly. And there at the bottom was the one where they'd…where she'd…. the memory triggered a phantom feeling of his lips on hers, causing a deep blush to appear on her face before throwing herself into her pillow and screaming. Why did I take them with me? Why did I keep the stupid thing? It was a mistake! Marco thought the photo booth was magic, that's all. One more awkward memory passenger on the bestie train. And yet, if that's how she really felt, why did her heartbeat pick up every time she thought about that kiss? Why were memories of her confessing her crush to him last summer playing back in her mind?
The ride back home with Tom from the wedding had been a blur. They'd sat next to each other in his demon carriage and he'd casually thrown his arm around her while going on and on about…pie, she thought? Not important. What was important was that normally snuggling with Tom was nice, relaxing, a source of warmth both figuratively and literally. But the whole way back all that was on Star's mind was an enormous sense of guilt, the pictures burning a hole in her pocket. She thought she'd left those feelings for Marco behind when he'd gone back to earth after Toffee was defeated. He was right in the booth; they'd never brought it up again and she'd taken it as a sign that he was happy with Jackie and that he and Star would be just friends. Then she'd danced with Tom at the Silver Bell Ball and seen how much he was trying to be a better person and a better prince and well…she'd fallen for him again. She even remembered telling him specifically at the Silver Bell Ball that she and Marco weren't a thing! And now…now this had happened. The carriage had dropped her off at Butterfly castle and Tom had gotten out with her and escorted her to the front door. They'd said goodnight to one another and when he leaned in for a parting kiss Star had totally handled it with the maturity and grace of the future queen of Mewni and…. no. No, Star had freaked out and quickly begged off, faking a sudden coughing fit and opting to give Tom a hug instead. And of course, like a great boyfriend, he'd trusted her completely and had gone back to the underworld with a smile big enough to hit his third eye, convinced this had been nothing more than another great night with his girlfriend. Oh, if only he knew. Oh corn, what's going to happen if he finds out? Marco wouldn't tell him about this, would he? Should I? No! That would make things waayyyy too awkward between them and they just started being friends! Seeing the two most important boys in her life finally getting along after so much early animosity had made Star's heart soar, she couldn't ruin that now. The best thing to do would be to just get rid of the pictures and move on like nothing had happened. Which was exactly what she'd told herself she was going to do yesterday. Instead she'd walked around the Cloud Kingdom with Pony Head all day trying to think of a good time to dispose of the photos while also fighting the urge to just spill the whole story to someone, anyone. The only thing that held her back was the knowledge that, for as much as she loved the detached unicorn head, she was horrible at keeping secrets, and forget Tom, the entire multiverse would probably have heard what had happened before the end of the week. When she'd gotten back, she'd gone straight to her room, not even bothering to check in on Marco. She just….it was confusing to be around him right now. And so, the pictures still sat there. "I can't get rid of them." She mused out loud to herself. Placing them instead inside the drawer, she headed to the bathroom to get ready for the day. "But I do need to talk to Marco, today."
Later that day after a long training session, breakfast, a shower, and a few other errands, Marco stood outside Star's door dressed in his customary hoodie and jeans and completely incapable of movement. C'mon Diaz, all you gotta do is knock on the door and ask to talk with Star, nice and easy. Except when she asks what you want to talk about and then you have to go through what you're feeling and oh I can't do this, nope, no way, not happening, just gonna walk right out of here. But just as Marco was turning to leave, the door to Star's room swung open and there was said princess wearing one of her signature outfits, a light blue blouse with darker blue skirt held up by suspenders and purple devil horns today.
Seeing the young Latino hanging outside her door, Star cocked an eyebrow, "Marco? What are you doing outside my room?"
Sweat broke out across Marco's brow and he started rubbing the back of his head nervously as he scrambled to come up with a reasonable excuse. "Oh, you know. Just checking up on ya, fulfilling those squirely duties and all. Just uh…. cornshake!"
"Cornshake?" She repeated in confusion.
"Yeah, cornshake! Thought we could go get some since we didn't get to hang out yesterday and I know how busy you've been with your princess duties and all and…yeah." Marco trailed off awkwardly, not knowing how to continue. Please just let her buy it. Meanwhile a tiny Marco in the back of his subconscious was screaming You idiot! We were trying to get away from Star to avoid a horribly awkward conversation and you decided the best possible lie was to invite her to get a cornshake?! We don't even like cornshakes!
As if to prove the point Star helpfully mentioned, "Marco, you don't even like cornshakes." Subconscious Marco fell into despondent wailing at that point.
Marco was rapidly losing control of the situation at this point and had to keep himself from hyperventilating, "Yeah but I mean you do so I just thought that we, and then you, I mean and then I..."
Star rolled her eyes. Great, he's having a Marco moment, so not what I needed to deal with right now. Sighing, Star grabbed him by the front of the hoodie and dragged him into her room, kicking the door closed once the two were fully inside. Half pulling and half carrying Marco she deposited him sitting on her bed and plopped down next to him on the opposite end, both staring out at the balcony and what could only be described as a stunning Mewni late afternoon in front of them as the sun slowly traced its arc to the horizon. Seeing that small glimpse of nature in all its glory brought Marco back to his senses and he inhaled deeply, trying to center himself, eyes pointedly fixed on the horizon and not on the princess sitting two feet away from him. Star for her part kept her eyes fixed on Marco, partially concerned for him, part annoyed at him, and the rest just curious about what he'd come by for. Oh, and a very, very tiny, almost insignificant part of her was silently screaming that he not open the top drawer of her nightstand that she sat him down right next to that had the pictures from the photobooth in them! It's alright, Marco wouldn't have any reason to go looking through my stuff anyway, he's not Janna after all. Of course, Star then proceeded to internally lose her mind when Marco propped himself up by leaning one arm of said nightstand, fingertips lazily circling the knob that would allow him to open the drawer, as if the universe were mocking her, tempting him to unveil the secret within.
She wasn't ready for this, she was so absolutely 100% not ready for this conversation, she didn't think she'd ever be ready. Star prided herself on her fearlessness, on her ability to always stay cool under fire no matter what. But this…this terrified her. She'd already had to confront her feelings for Marco once before and that had only been when she honestly thought she was never going to see him again. She had to face facts; Marco scared her. How ridiculous was that? Marco was her best friend. When she'd named him her squire, she had declared him to be her closest advisor and confidant and had meant it. But of course, the one thing she didn't want to talk about with him, couldn't talk about with him, involved him! Her hands absentmindedly began twisting her skirt back and forth, unsure of what to say, unsure of what to do. No small part of her was telling her to run, to hide, to avoid doing anything that might risk the friendship she held so dear even if that somehow meant running away from that friendship.
On the opposite end of that impossibly wide 2-foot space of comforter and bedsheet between them, Marco stared at the sun and let his mind wander, trying to seek a point of calm and serenity. For some reason though, all he could think of when he looked at that sunset was the soulrise on lava lake beach. The feeling of sadness that had engulfed him then when he realized Star was taken, the anger at Tom for dating her, the anger at himself for not realizing his feelings sooner, and the fear. The overwhelming fear that somehow this was going to cost him his friendship with Star, the thing he valued most in the world. He had meant it when they'd almost died because of that stupid QuestBuy gift card, Star's friendship was the one thing in the entire universe he wanted more than anything else. He just hadn't realized, or maybe hadn't been willing to admit at the time that those incredibly strong feelings of friendship were also feelings of romance…of affection…of lo…. no. If he couldn't say it to her he wasn't going to say it at all! It was time to talk this out; like they should have yesterday, or in the photo booth, or at lava lake beach, or before he'd gone back to earth, or when they'd hugged in the dungeon trying to stop Ludo and Toffee, or so many other opportunities. How much time had he wasted because he sucked at communicating?
He turned to face her, hoping the resolve he tried plastering on his face made up for the way the resolve in his voice immediately cracked when he turned and spoke to her. "Hey Star?"
The young princess looked up from her skirt, trying and failing to meet his gaze. "Yeah Marco, what's up?"
He gulped…do or die time Diaz. "Can we…can we talk about the ummm…. the photo booth?"
Star immediately jumped into deflection mode. "What about it Marco? We covered everything. You thought the photo booth was magic, Ben was just messing with us, you said you felt like things have been different, our guts made noises, end of story. There's nothing left to talk about."
"No Star there's more to it than that I really need to talk to you about what I said back there because I don't think my point quite came across and…"
Star jumped up and started marching towards the door, "Cornshakes! Right you said you wanted to get a cornshake with me remember? Well c'mon then, no time like right now, we can just sit around in public and drink cornshakes and have a nice time. Sound good? Sounds great to me, let's go!" She continued on to the exit when her momentum was suddenly arrested by Marco gripping her wrist. Star was so stunned that for a moment her mind went blank. It's not as if the mere act of Marco touching her bothered her; they hugged all the time, had thrown arms around one another for photos, and had even held hands. No, it was the fact that he was holding her in a restraining manner, not enough to hurt but trying to physically deny her the will to leave. She whirled on him then and Marco quickly let go, hands held up in a conciliatory gesture.
"Listen Star this is important and I can't just have you running off like usual." The second those words left his mouth Marco knew they had been a mistake.
"Oh, and just what is that supposed to mean Marco?!" Star was angry now. Marco had shown up here when she definitely didn't want to see him, had opened up a can of awkwardness that Star had been determined to keep closed, and now he was insulting her. Without thinking she shoved him, hard, forcing him back a couple of steps. "I don't know who the hell you think you are Diaz but you do not just get to grab a princess and tell her where she can and can't go!"
Marco looked chagrined for a moment but it was quickly replaced by a look of determination mixed in with some annoyance at the way Star was behaving. "Well maybe if this particular princess would actually stop and listen to me for a second, I wouldn't have had to do that." He let some of the intense bitterness from his dream earlier slip through, "Or is Tom the only one who's allowed to lay a finger on you anymore?"
Oh that is it! With a yell Star launched herself at him, fist cocked back and ready to lay into him. Much to her surprise though, Marco deflected her punch easily, he hadn't even had to move. Seeing red, Star followed up with a rapid series of punches and kicks. She was angry, she was upset, she was scared, and to her growing frustration, Marco just wouldn't take the hint and leave! He wasn't even fighting back! Just blocking her punches as they slowly circled one another in her room, his eyes laser focused on her, their normally warm chocolate color now hard and fierce. She was hardly going to say it out loud, but he had never looked more handsome in that moment, the defiance in his gaze and his body language lit a fire of passion in her, even as it further fueled her rage. After her latest kick was blocked, she took a step back to put some distance between them. "What's the matter safe kid? Just going to block the whole time?"
Now that did manage to get a rise out of Marco. "Watch it Star, you know I hate that name." His voice came out in a low growl of warning but Star wasn't having it.
"I'm just calling it like I see it Marco. I mean is this how you won those scissors from Hekapoo? Just blocked until she got tired and gave up?" She taunted him.
The words felt like stabs to Marco. She had no idea what he'd gone through in that quest! The decade and a half he'd spent fighting for survival every day, all to get those stupid scissors back so that they could keep going on their adventures, all to get back to his home! His family! To her…And now here she was, mocking him. Making of light of everything he had suffered, unwilling to face what was making him suffer right now. It was too much to handle. With a roar, Marco launched himself forward and before Star knew what was happening a fist was twisting into her gut, knocking the breath out of her and launching her backwards. Luckily, she recovered quickly and did a backflip in the air before gracefully landing on her feet. Before she could get set however, Marco was already back on her, launching a furious assault of fists and feet, trying to keep Star off-balance. She finally managed to win some space for herself by forcing him back with a kick aimed at his head and the two friends began to circle each other, panting heavily, defiance and adrenaline fueling them.
What followed was a clash of kicks, flips, punches, and blocks. Thrown hands, legs, knees and elbows as each tried to force the other to submit. At one point Star had been launched into the brick wall of her room so hard it had cracked under the force of the impact and Star had seen her namesake in her eyes as she sought to clear her vision. At another point Marco had had to do a series of cartwheels along the parapet lining the balcony of Star's room in order to avoid being knocked off and falling to a rather gruesome death. Now the two found themselves grappling on the floor, a tangled mass of limbs, legs intertwined with one another and hands locked together so tightly that their knuckles had gone white under the strain.
When Marco was on top there was a moment where Star's hair splayed out behind her on the floor, casting her face in what almost looked like a halo. It had given him a moment of pause and had allowed Star to get the upper hand, flipping them over. Now she was on top and attempting to maneuver Marco into a submission hold. Eyes fixed on each other and foreheads nearly touching, Star managed to growl out, "Why won't you just give up Marco?"
"Why won't you just let me talk to you Star?" He managed back through clenched teeth.
"I keep telling you, there's nothing left to talk about!"
"And I keep telling you there is!"
She was close now, she had the angle advantage and a lower center of gravity, this was almost over. He continued on anyway. "Star…please…just listen to me. I'm begging you."
"What Marco?! What could have been worth all this? What could have been so important that you needed to tell me at the risk of having your butt handed to you?"
"That I…. That I…"
"That you what?!" She had him, he was pinned!
"That I have a crush on you! There, are you happy now?!" Star instantly let go of him, shock etched onto her face, unable to form any coherent words, just a random sputtering and stuttering that sounded eerily similar to how she'd sounded after the kiss in the photobooth or how Marco had sounded when she'd confessed to him in front of everyone at his summer party months ago. Finally, she managed to stammer out, "you…what?"
"I have a crush on you Star. That kiss in the photobooth, it wasn't just because I thought the booth was magic. I mean, don't get me wrong, I really did think the booth was magic, stupid Ben. But I also just really wanted to kiss you. It was killing me how you kept talking about how the photos we were taking weren't the same anymore and how different our adventures seemed and I guess I just couldn't hold it back anymore. Things have changed so much ever since I came back to Mewni and it just felt like this pressure has been building and I didn't know what to do with it. So, I stopped thinking for probably the first time in my life and just went for something. And you know what? It's probably one of the most honest things I've done in my life. I've been trying to figure out how to tell you since it happened…I was going to tell you this afternoon before," he gestured around the torn-up room, "all this happened."
Marco didn't know what sort of reaction to expect, if any, but he certainly wasn't expecting the laughter that came out of Star's mouth. Not the jovial, gut-busting peals of angelic laughter he'd come to associate with her either, but a low and bitter laugh. "You really suck sometimes; you know that Marco?"
"Star I..."
"Yeah, you. I'll admit when I told you I had a crush on you in front of everyone it wasn't exactly my…best…moment. But like you said, you never brought it up again and yeah, it stunk but you wanna know something? I accepted it. I thought you were happy with Jackie, that we could just move on as friends and life would go on. Then Tom came back into my life, I was focusing on being a better princess, life finally started to make sense again! And then boom, like a rampaging warnicorn you just had to come back in and storm through my life." Tears were now spilling down here face. "I've been working so hard Marco. I've been trying to be a better princess, a good girlfriend, working on helping monsters, and keeping my friendship with you. And you're ruining all of it. You've made me so afraid of everything…afraid of you."
What does she mean by that? "Star I don't get it, why the heck would you be afraid of me?"
The tears came more freely now, soft sobs racking the young princess' body. "Because your friendship means everything to me Marco. You've always seen me as Star, and just Star. Not princess Star, not Star the rebel daughter or Star the absentee girlfriend or Star the fighter for monster equality, just me. Do you have any idea how precious that is? And if anything changed that; dating you, not dating you…I have no idea what I'd do with my life. I can't lose you Marco…I…I just can't." Anything further Star might have said was cut off by a fresh wave of tears as she slowly curled in on herself, unconsciously seeking anything to hold onto, even her own body, to keep her grounded, to keep her safe. She wasn't too surprised to quickly feel a warm pair of arms wrap themselves around her and pull her tight to a broad chest, her tears quickly staining the grey t-shirt she now found her head resting on. That idiot…. he's such a…a Marco. He'll always be a Marco. She tried to protest, attempting to disengage from him while muttering "let go of me." But the push was weak and the words lacked the weight and venom from earlier when he'd grabbed her wrist, they both knew she didn't really mean it. Right now, she needed him, and like always, he was there for her. It was simultaneously the most endearing and most annoying thing about him.
Marco leaned down slowly until his head was resting on top of hers, mirroring the hug they'd shared when he'd freed her from the Butterfly dungeon during the Toffee crisis. "I'm sorry Star. I'm so sorry. I should have cleared this up with you months ago, maybe even all the way back at the Love Sentence concert. I was just wrestling with my own feelings for so long and I really thought I liked Jackie and it took me months to figure things out and by then you were with Tom. I…I didn't want to get in the way of you being happy, or him either. He really is a good guy…for a demon." They both got a chuckle out of that one. "The truth is by the time I figured things out all I knew was that I didn't want to lose you as a friend either, and that I couldn't leave. So, I stayed as your squire, tried to build a life here, and tried to move past it all. I even thought working with Hekappo for a little while would get my mind off of things but that stopped with the whole portaling every night business. So…. here I am I guess."
Star made another move to worm her way out of his grip for real this time and Marco acquiesced. She moved and sat down next to him though still within arm's reach. She thought back over what he had just said and a thought occurred to her, "You said by the time you figured out your feelings I was already back together with Tom right?"
"Yeah…" Marco said hesitantly, not exactly sure where this was going.
"Tom and I have been together for months now, when exactly did you come to this grand realization?"
"That time we all went to lava lake beach on… on my birthday." Marco stared at the floor, fighting back the feeling of pain that rose in his chest every time he thought of that image. "Tad helped me figure it out when I was trying to help him figure out Kelly didn't want to be with him anymore and then I ran back to where you were and you and Tom were kissing and he was…he was wearing my hoodie." The last two words rolled off Marco's tongue and fell to the floor like lead weights, realization suddenly dawning in Star's eyes.
"Oh, Marco I'm sorry… I wouldn't have… I mean if you had just told me giving Tom one of your hoodies was going to bother you so much then I wouldn't have…" Star trailed off as Marco held up a hand.
"It's fine Star, I have a million of them. It was…it was seeing you kiss someone in my hoodie, a hoodie that was all cut up and someone that wasn't…that wasn't me. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Not exactly the best way to celebrate turning 15 you know?"
"So why didn't you say anything?" Marco looked up at Star's question, seeing her with her arms crossed and a look he couldn't quite identify on her face. Frustration maybe? Exasperation? Maybe even a little angry?
"What exactly was I supposed to say Star? Hey best buddy who I never resolved that whole you confessing you had a crush on me in front of my parents, all our friends, and my girlfriend! I know I just dropped back into your life after my girlfriend broke up with me because I couldn't get my head out of my ass for more than 5 seconds and that you have a boyfriend now who's also one of my best friends but I suddenly realized I have a crush on you, wanna try and make it work? Somehow I don't think you would've appreciated it too much."
"You never did tell me why Jackie broke up with you."
"You never asked."
"I'm asking now aren't I?"
Marco shook his head ruefully. This girl could give Hekapoo a run for her stubbornness sometimes. Maybe even Glossaryck. Probably shouldn't mention that. "She saw that I couldn't stop talking about Mewni, or wearing your dad's meat blanket. I could go all cynical and say she just got tired of me talking about helping save Mewni all the time but the truth is I think she saw I was miserable on Earth. I wanted to prove her wrong so I took her on this super romantic date that ended with us watching the sunset on the pier. Then she found out I was still wearing the cape underneath my hoodie. She told me if I was forcing myself to stay in Echo Creek for her that we'd both end up miserable. I told her that I wanted to make things work with her and that she was…." Marco trailed off there, he really didn't want to finish that sentence in front of Star.
Star for her part wasn't letting him get away that easily. "You told her she was what Marco? The love of your life? Your soulmate? The girl you'd been pining after for years? C'mon I bet whatever it was it couldn't have been that bad."
Marco gulped, pretty sure I'm about to take my life into my hands here. "I told her she was my best friend."
Star just stared at him. No yelling, no crying, nothing, as if she'd become a statue. Crystal clear blue eyes wide as dinner plates and mouth opened ever so slightly as if longing to speak but incapable of remembering how. He…he really told Jackie she was his best friend? After everything we went through? How could he do that? Do I really mean that little to him? Marco looked down for a moment, shame clouding his face before continuing.
"Then she told me that we both knew that wasn't true, kissed my cheek and left on her skateboard. That was the last time I talked with her. Couple days later I was cutting a portal open to Mewni and hopped into your bedroom. Because she was right; Jackie isn't my best friend Star, you are, and even if it's just as your friend I don't want to think about not having you in my life. But I do have feelings for you and I thought you had a right to know that. It's like I said in the booth, it's too hard for me to keep pretending things aren't different now and I know it's in the way but I needed to tell you and you had a right to know."
Marco made to stand up and starting walking towards the door. Star stared at him, still trying to come to grips with everything he'd told her, what it meant for her…for them. He told me I had a right to know about his feelings. Does that mean he has a right to know about the pictures? What's he going to say when he finds out? This could break us up… I mean break our friendship up! But…this is Marco, and he did just tell me he had a crush on me. But I don't want to get his hopes up! I have Tom. I'm happy with Tom! Very happy in fact! So happy that I kept the pictures of me kissing another boy who happens to be my best friend and who I used to have a crush on…. right. Marco had reached the door by now and Star realized this was her last chance to say something.
"So that's it then?" She called out to him.
Marco turned around, one hand on the doorknob, eyebrow cocked. "What'd you mean 'that's it then?'"
Pushing herself up, Star dusted off her dress, "You came in, we fought, you told me you had a crush on me and now you're walking away, just like that?"
Marco stepped away from the door, turning back to face the young princess. "What else is there to say Star? I know you don't have feelings for me like that anymore. You're with Tom and you two seem really happy together and I'm happy for you both, I really am! So, I told you what I needed to tell you, how I feel, and I figured after all that I'm probably the last person you want to have around right now. So yeah, that was it. Unless you had something, you wanted to tell me?"
When Star didn't reply, Marco turned around once more, "that's what I thought" he called over his shoulder.
The internal turmoil was giving Star what she imagined a heart attack would feel like. Her thoughts seemed to manifest themselves into two separate Stars arguing with each other. Just tell him! No, it won't change anything! You don't know that! Yes, I do! The pressure kept building within Star until it only had once place to go, out. "I kept the pictures!" The second the words left her mouth; Star slapped her hands over her mouth. Star's thought-based doppelgangers both face-palmed. Nice job princess, way to just blurt it out.
Marco turned around once more, exasperation at the continued delays to his leaving mixed with a lack of understanding. "The pictures?" Star kept her mouth covered, violently shaking her head, hoping he would drop it. No such luck however.
"What pictures Star?" He walked over to her and ever so gently took her hands away from her mouth and held them in his own. "Whatever it is, I promise you can trust me." She looked up into his eyes and found warmth, understanding, affection. They'd always been Star's favorite thing about him. Star had heard some humans say that wore their hearts on their sleeves, always telegraphing what they were feeling with body language. For Marco, his heart was in his eyes. He always let his emotions play out on them freely and openly. Case in point, he had just confessed to her, he thought it was something she didn't want, and yet here he was, a few short inches from her and not bothering to hide his feelings for her…his love for her. She wanted those eyes on her forever. She wanted to look into them and see his soul. She wanted to watch them close when he fell asleep next to her or go half-lidded in lust as she enticed him. Those thoughts rung in her head like a bell, clearing away thoughts of all else, including her doubts. She had to tell him. "The pictures from the photo booth, the ones where we kissed. I went back and grabbed them after we left. They're sitting in the top drawer of my dresser right now; you can go get them if you don't believe me. Eyes wide with disbelief, Marco dropped Star's hands, he'd forgotten for a moment he'd been holding them this whole time, and approached Star's dresser. Shaking slightly, he reached in and sure enough, pulled out the short stream of photos from their last pictures that night, the incriminating one at the bottom stood out most prominently. Eyes closed, lips softly connected, holding each other's forearms lightly.
"Star I…I don't get it, why did you keep these? Did you just not want anyone to see them? You could've just thrown them out or burned them you know. They're not safe here."
Star held her hands clasped behind her back to keep herself from shaking and to keep Marco from seeing her nervousness. Walking forward she rapidly closed the distance between them. "No Marco, that's not why I kept them."
"Then wh…." Marco's unfinished question was cut short as Star suddenly grabbed his face and pulled it down to hers, eyes closed, one hand bunched up in his hoodie, the other running itself up through his hair and the softest feeling on his lips, a softness he thought he'd never feel again, pressing against him. Marco's eyes shot as wide as dinner plates, his brain utterly incapable of comprehending what was happening, before instinct and want took over and his eyes slid closed in turn, he lips returning the pressure he felt against them. When he made a move to deepen the kiss Star responded eagerly. When he slid one hand along her waist and the other into her golden hair he was rewarded with a light moan. Marco wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. It could've been five minutes; it could've been five hours. Time tended to lose its sense of meaning when you were with a girl like Star, the one still functioning part of his brain mused, especially when one was kissing a girl like Star. Wait…I'm kissing Star. Oh God I'm kissing Star, what the hell am I thinking?! Air, need air! Not okay! With a gasp, Marco broke the kiss, almost shoving Star away even as he continued to hold onto her shoulders, keeping them within arm's length of one another. Star's eyes reopened, a pouty look adorning her features as she'd been rather enjoying all that kissing, until realization dawned on her in turn about who exactly she'd been doing that kissing with and what it meant.
With a groan, Marco sat on the bed before throwing himself backwards, one hand covering his face while the other beat angrily into the mattress. Star sat down next to him, grabbing his clenched hand and coaxing it to intertwine with her own, her thumb casually running itself over the top of his hand. Opening his eyes but not rising, Marco's look was one of guilt and resignation. "We just kissed…. again."
Star gave him a lopsided grin hoping to cheer him up but quickly cut it off when she saw it wasn't working. "Look on the bright side Marco, it wasn't your fault this time and we already hit max awkwardness last time so it can't get any worse."
That at least got a chuckle out of Marco. "Gee thanks Star, that definitely makes it all better."
"Sarcasm is unbecoming of a squire Marco."
"Bite me Butterfly."
"That an insult or a request Diaz?" That at least got Marco to sit up.
"Star…what exactly does this mean… for us? You and me? You're with Tom and we just kissed…again. Twice in three days. And this time you kissed me."
"Yes, Marco I know. I was there both times."
Marco crossed his arms, "A straight answer would be nice then. This isn't exactly helping me see things clearly."
Star sighed deeply, bringing Marco's hand, still intertwined with hers, to her lips and planting a soft kiss on the back of it. "It means I'm just as confused as you are Marco. It means I'm with Tom and I'm happy with Tom but…. I like this." She gestured to the photos now sitting between them. "I liked what we just did. And I like this too." This time shaking their conjoined hands for effect. You're my best friend Marco. I always feel safe around you, happy around you…. loved around you. You're also a pretty damn good kisser." That last one gave Marco a deep blush. "I like Tom and he's trying so hard to be a better person, a better boyfriend. But with you the feelings are just so much stronger, and with everything that's going on it's just making my life way more complicated."
Marco looked at her, the faintest spark of hope kindling in his soul. He was afraid to even acknowledge its existence for fear it would disappear like a fading dream. Still, he had to ask…. "So, there's a chance for us then?"
Star smiled at him. A soft smile he'd come to know in their private moments together. It was unlike anything else he'd seen in any other dimension. Soft, warm, full of promises, hope, and it gave Marco the feeling that anything was possible every time he saw it. "I love you Marco. If there wasn't a chance for us already, I'd make one." The smile faded then, replaced by a more serious expression. "But I do have a lot of thinking to do. I'm not sure it's possible, but if there's a way to make sure no one gets hurt by this in the end, I'd like to find it."
Nodding, Marco rose. "I understand. I should probably let you get some rest and uh…clean up your room. Sorry about some of the destruction by the way."
Scoffing, Star pulled out her wand and with a glowing wave, the damage was repaired. Marco facepalmed. "Right…forgot about the magic for a second."
"How could you possibly forget I'm a magical princess Marco?"
"It's been a long day alright don't judge me."
"Totally judging you."
Laughing Marco gave a half mocking bow. "Until I see you then oh magical princess Butterfly." Star giggled, the sound music to Marco's ears as he turned to leave only to hear a shout of "MARCO!" Come screaming at him.
He turned to barely catch Star in his arms who quickly locked her legs around his waist and arms around his neck before giving him another long and deep kiss. When they broke apart a minute to two later, she dropped lightly to the ground and booped him on the nose. Marco was only able to utter a broke "umwhaaaa."
Star swayed; a blush clear over her hearts. "Just needed one for the road Diaz. I'll see you tomorrow, ok? You can take me out for those cornshakes you hate so much," she finished with a giggle.
Marco, still somewhat dazed nodded, "yeah, cornshakes, ok Star," before finally leaving the room. After exiting, he leaned against the doorframe, one hand held over his pulsing heart. Though he couldn't see it, Star was mirroring his expression on the other side of her door. Each of them fell asleep that night with soaring hearts and smiles on their faces. Not everything had been resolved between the two of them, and a long road lay ahead as they would have to navigate their newly acknowledged feelings without anyone else getting hurt. It wouldn't be easy, but then again nothing worth fighting for ever was. The important thing was that regardless of what form it took, the pair still had each other, bound up inseparably in their lives and journeys. Meanwhile, overhead, the blood moon shone down upon the young lovebirds. It's crimson glow bright and true.
A/N: Phew! That went on for longer than I'd intended. Again, all thanks to my friend Lord Cornwallis for this challenge. If you're wondering why I posted this separately from my one-shot series "Across the Star(s)," it was to give this little challenge as much exposure as possible. Two authors, both calling themselves lord, pushing each other to get creative and spin up the best tales possible. It deserved better than to be buried as the 11th chapter in some anthology. So, did you like this? Have a challenge or suggestion of your own? You know how to reach me and Cornwalis if you do. Until my next update, stay classy.