Hey everyone. Sorry, but I need the extra couple of days to make this part. I had them sitting in front of me like puzzle pieces, but putting them together was a little hard because I wanted it to flow a little more. So I apologize if this is a little boring.
Not only that, but I was just diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It's not life threatening or anything major, but it's a downer to have that start off my spring break. So as I post this at…10 o'clock at night; share with me in the homemade spaghetti I made as I post this for comfort.
Thank you to everyone who favorited and followed! And a special thank you so much for your reviews. Every kind word is appreciated – and constructive criticism is welcome.
angel897, Becka3490, Dhalmi93, and pourquoibella – Thank you for the kind words and I hope you like this part!
Lesliezen – Dwalin is not afraid to ask the tough questions ;)
inperfection – I think Thorin would have been torn between laughter and protecting her honor…I don't even know what his expression would have been. It's a tiny bit of slow burn for pacing, but there will be more bonding after Azog and everything is on the table.
Jenn – I'm glad you like her and how I approached the "male" thing. I wanted to try something different. So I'm glad you like it. :)
Christina Fey – I think I'm gonna have one more chapter between this one and Goblin Town, but there be Stone Giants ahead.
Everyone please be sure to check out QueefCream's story: Lians' Contingency. She recently completed it and is a really good read!
One of my reviewers is Lesliezin. I absolutely love her Thorin/OC story: A Shadowed Companion. All should read, it's fantastic and it's getting crazy.
I want to give a shout out to JensPen (previously JMac322). She has just started the second part to her Thorin/OC story and I absolutely love it. Check out both parts. The first one is Home is Behind and the second part is The World Ahead. We correspond regularly so I'm sure she would love more conversation than just me! Go check her stuff out!
We make it out of the valley just as the sun begins reaching over the horizon. The small rocky paths wind in and out for an hour or so before leading to flat grasslands. We rest momentarily in the safety of the rocks before planning our next move. The elves would surely know we have gone by now. I hope Tauriel didn't get into too much trouble…
I lean on a rock facing the path ahead of us, slowly devouring a biscuit Bombur gave me while we rested. It's nice to have something else in my stomach especially after I realize that the only real thing I had to eat was a strip of bacon and some cherries. I shouldn't go this long without a real meal, but at the times I had an opportunity…there were other things going on. After the biscuit is gone I decide to break into my personal stores and take out more of the dried meat I made from before we ran into the trolls. It would be gone soon and I would have to keep an eye out for rabbits along the plains before we hit the mountains. We could eat snakes as well, but if we could avoid it I would be happier for it. Snake tastes…wrong.
Beyond that, when we reach the mountains, we would have to rely on whatever flora might be nestled among the rocks for food. The worst case there might be some moss we could eat if there are any trees. I shake my head at my own silliness. Food would be fine; we have taken enough food from Rivendell to make it through the Misty Mountains. The real problem I should focus on at the moment is goblins. I know for a fact that their numbers have been growing and it would be treacherous getting through the whole ordeal without at least one encounter. With how dark the mountains have become in recent years I wouldn't be surprised if we were chased through the mountains relentlessly. I have been in the West for three years now, but I still remember my lonely crossing through the mountains and the dozens of goblins I slaughtered there.
I run a hand over my bare face, hoping to rub away some of my anxiety. Once the valley was well and truly behind us I had removed my mask. There isn't a point to wear it all the time now; the others have seen me without it already.
For once I actually find myself wishing the wizard was here. I would be able to keep the company safe from goblins, but there are other creatures in these mountains that would be easier to face if Gandalf were here. I may be powerful, but I am no Maiar of the Valar. Not to mention it would also help to have him a round now that we know the company is being hunted by orcs.
I started thinking about this once we left Rivendell. With nothing more than saturated guilt on my mind I start to consider why we were being hunted in the first place. Orc packs, while not entirely uncommon, normally came up from the south. However, those were Gundabad wargs and that meant they had come down from the north. What were they doing this far from their own camps? I can't see them just hunting us for the sake of hunting us.
I look back behind me to see Fili and Kili showing Bilbo how to make a snare for a rabbit. He looks a little morose about the whole thing, but nods his head as listens. He may be a little uptight at times, but it is clear that he realizes it's the only food source we will have at our disposal for a while yet. I watch the brothers closely as they each describe their own methods for catching them, apparently having different luck with different traps.
I'm beginning to realize just how vulnerable we are. The entire line of Durin, aside from Lady Dis in the Blue Mountains and their cousins in the Iron Hills, is here. If Fili and Kili were to parish along with Thorin on this quest there wouldn't be any others to take their place. This mission is all or nothing it would seem. I can't help thinking bitterly that at least if they had remained in the Blue Mountains they would be safe from being hunted.
Not for the first time, I wonder why Thorin allowed his nephews to come on this trip. With a dragon at the end of it they already anticipated the chance of defeat. It would be devastating blow to all those who Thorin fought for. So why would he risk it?
I know that the boys wouldn't have let him leave them behind, but it still feels wrong that he brought them. While I know they wouldn't have stayed put even if he tried, I felt like he could have tried harder. Just knowing the sons of Dis, I know better, but it just seems like Thorin should have been enough to make them stay…When did I start to perceive him like he's a force of nature?
I chuckle a little conjuring an image of Thorin as a large gust of southern wind blowing down all who are in his path. I glance further back from the group is situated and can see Thorin, Balin, and Dwalin returning. Thorin looks up at me and after meeting my eyes, gives me a quick nod.
"We are moving out. We will rest once more in the afternoon and will make camp once it gets dark. Take care of any last minute needs you have because there will be no stopping until then," says Thorin.
The others all start moving and prepare for the day's walk. I stay still to relish the last few moments of peace that I can get. Now that we are on a time limit there is no more leisurely walking. Every step is now a race against time, which is daunting to say the least. We are only mortal, we need rest and food, but time stands still for no one. For a moment, I can't help feeling like I am back at the ranger camps and we are moving out for the day…
"How you feelin' this morning, lass?"
I sit up to look at my mentor. Vohar is an older ranger with a good temperament and is very wise. He works closely with the commander of our legion, Morrigan. It wouldn't be until years later and after his death, that I discovered Morrigan to be Arathorn. It had been rumored to every greenhorn of the camps, that the line of Isildur was hidden amongst the ranger ranks. I had not cared much at the time, but apparently it was true.
"It could have been worse," I say as I pull myself up. I don't stretch too much, afraid of causing myself more damage than relief. My ribs are still badly bruised after our run in with trolls last night, "Just sore mostly."
While we travelled during the day, Ethon had discovered a place where wild blackberries grew and after spotting it, wanted to backtrack at night to take some with us. Unfortunately, he had missed all the signs that there were trolls in the area. Hardly a few weeks ago he had discovered the truth about me purely by accident. Then he had tried to cover for me when others thought to root me out. Because of this I was slowly beginning to keep him around for the enjoyment of his company rather than for the sake of keeping my secret hidden. So while I had noticed the broken trees and human remains, I still ran to keep up with him when he ran headlong after the fruit.
After turning a sharp corner, I was met with a large arm and hand which threw me into the nearest tree. Luckily, there had been no broken bones, but the bruises would mottle my body for weeks. Ethon had narrowly escaped the initial blow and after I had regained my senses I dealt with the threat directly and killed the two trolls. After his initial surprise, Ethon had been guilt-ridden the rest of the night. I had been happy that there was no repeat of the incident in the White Mountains. Ethon hadn't been with us at the time; and while I am grateful he didn't see what became of our fellow rangers I wish that he would at least know better.
When we returned to camp Vohar and Brehon, another commander of the ranks of rangers, had demanded to know what happened. I relayed the details and several men were dispatched to see if there were more trolls and if they could locate a hoard. They managed to find one, but they returned in hopes of using the advantage of daylight later. There had been two other trolls, but it would appear that they had been fighting and managed to knock each other out. Only one other ranger was injured by a flailing arm while dragging them out into the sunlight.
"Aye," he responds. "You will be for a while. I don't know what the lad was thinkin'." He says as we walk towards the large stew pot near the tents of the senior rangers. He is shaking his head as he considers Ethon.
"Apparently blackberries are rare this time of year," I answer. "He was quite eager to share his discovery."
"He would have gotten himself killed and you as well," he explains. I make a noncommittal grunt, not particularly caring of what might have happened.
"He just needs to learn. Ethon's only been with us for a few weeks," I say. "We all had to start somewhere. This is his start."
"Most people don't need a near death experience to get started," he says nonchalantly. I say nothing because I have no room to judge. It took a lot of people dying to get me where I am. My silence has him looking over at me and I just shrug. We are almost at our destination when Ethon comes running up to me. His eyes are wide and he bows his head to me, assuming it's an apology so I nod in return.
"Are you alright, Ethon?"
The boy nods and a blush starts to form on his cheeks. He holds out the tin to me, "I want to say that I'm sorry about last night and it won't happen again. I want you to have these considering that you were the one who got hurt because of me."
I open the tin to see it filled to the brim with fresh blackberries. For a moment I can't say anything, so surprised by the thoughtfulness of the gift, but when I look up into his hopeful brown eyes I find the words.
"Thank you, Ethon," I smile. He smiles back at me. I think he knows that I don't hold anything against him, but I can't always be too sure with him. Vohar suddenly wraps his arms over both of our shoulders and draws us in to garner our attention.
"After young Ethon told of how you handled that troll last night I made up my mind. I have been meaning to ask if you wanted to join my troop and remain under my mentorship." It is no secret that the two regiments would soon be separating and with Vohar turning east he would only take the most exceptional rangers and recruits. "What do you say you two?"
"Both of us?" asks Ethon. "Even after last night?"
"Well everyone has to start somewhere," chuckles the elder as he winks at me. "And you have just promised to not let it happen again. I can only come to expect better from now on. Besides I think it best if Kalar here kept an eye on you. Not as many rangers have such…patience."
"What do you think, Kalar?" asks Ethon excitedly.
I came for proper training in the wilds, where the training took place is of little consequence, but if the better fighters are heading to the other side of the Misty Mountains than it is clearly the better choice, "I accept."
"Me too," supplies Ethon eagerly.
"Excellent," he says with a grin. "Eat well and finish your morning exercises, with caution young lady. I can't have you damaging yourself further before we begin. We will ride out midmorning and at the noon time meal we will separate and head for the High Pass. Be ready you two." With that the old man walks on to the food line and leaves us to our thoughts.
"I'm sorry," Ethon suddenly states again. "You don't have to play babysitter you know? I can take care of myself, but…the worst I've ever fought was my fath…other human men. Everything else is a little new to me."
When he had first discovered my secret he had told me about how he had run away from home to avoid his drunken father after his ill mother had passed. His story and gentle heart called out to me so I told no one. Then as a show of loyalty he had lied for me to our mentor in hopes of maintaining my disguise, but I wouldn't let him. I didn't want either of us to be seen as liars. Still, in his own way, it was really sweet.
"Then I will teach you how," I say as I extend a blackberry to him. "And we will learn to work together. Then you will be able to protect yourself." He visibly brightens at my words and accepts the blackberry tenderly.
"I look forward to it, Kalar," he says. He is getting ready to turn and join the others, but I grab his shoulder and turn him around. He looks a little surprised, but waits patiently. Despite his ignorance and inexperience, I can easily say that Ethon is one of the sweetest people I've ever met. He deserves the whole truth.
"Kalar was my father's name. I use it in place of my real one," I explain. The wide wonder in his eyes causes my cheeks to heat up a little. Why does it feel like I'm naked before him when I'm just telling him my name? "My name is Tahna."
"Tahna," he whispers with a grin on his face. A moment passes where I wait for him to say something. "I appreciate you telling me that, but I hope you don't mind that I'm still gonna call you Kalar."
"Why?" I ask mildly curious. I thought that he would like to use it. In all honesty I want someone to call me that just because it's nice to hear my real name every once in a while.
"I confess that I'm a little selfish at times and now that you told me your name, I feel pretty special. So you can bet I'm not gonna share you with anyone else," he says with a wink. The blush on my face deepens as he walks away. What did I just do?
It is our second night out on the plains and the foothills of the Misty Mountains are just out of sight. We would reach them either tomorrow or the day after. My unease about the goblins grows as the distance between us and the mountains shrinks. There are a few signs that there have been goblins this far from the mountains; mostly forgotten arrows. I share my findings with the others and despite the negative reception of the news we cannot afford to stop. So the only feasible plan we could come up with was extra vigilance and quieter conversations as we continued forward. We have also been making due with smaller campfires, but that's not a very worrisome point.
While the group isn't entirely silent, the lack of conversation puts me a little more on edge. As I try to fall asleep for the night I think about Hadrien of all things. He would be so lively regardless of the goblins. He would have made me laugh until I brought all of the goblins down on our heads. I miss him dearly and I'm sure that Tauriel does too. It seems my guilty conscious will not let me be…
We stand outside the border of Mirkwood waiting for Tauriel to arrive. The sparrow Hadrien sent only days before had apparently been enough for Thranduil to send guards ahead to bar us from entering the wood. It hardly seems necessary, considering a Balrog is the only thing on this Earth that would force me beyond the tree line…maybe not even then. However, I must look eager as I search for Tauriel amongst the darkening wood.
I tense as I feel a hand in my hair for what seems like the hundredth time today.
"Hadrien," I growl, "Keep your hands to yourself!" I swat at his hands. I look up at his impish grin with a faltering frown.
With a large smile he cheekily eyes my hair again, "I cannot help it. I have never seen your hair this long. You really should grow it out."
"I don't know how you elves manage to tame as much hair as you have," I snort. "However, us poor mortals have to deal with things like knots and tangles in our hair."
"Oh you poor, unfortunate soul," he chuckles with mirth.
"I'm just saying it's easier to manage this way," I grumble. My eyes spot a figure stepping off the Elven Path. "She's here," I breathe.
We are still several yards out when Tauriel enters the daylight. Her red hair and bright green eyes gleaming in the sun's rays. Hadrien and I all, but abandon our horses, determined to close the gap between us. Tauriel also surges forward – allowing us to meet halfway. Hadrien and I wrap our arms around her as we settle our heads on her shoulders.
The first time we had met after the incident was awkward as I tried to give them space for their reunion, but both had seen fit to include me. Tauriel's hug had been a great surprise and an even greater comfort. I didn't think I would adjust so well to letting people touch me, but I had to. Ethon never really demanded much from me physically, but Hadrien would have driven me mad otherwise. He's just so…affectionate.
"Savni dae idhrad," she tells us.
"Ahm idharadh, elenen," says Hadrien as he pets her hair. We pull back from the embrace, but remain close. Tauriel gives us both a quick once over and her eyes linger on my head.
"Thoronen, fingen galaeden," she says with a smile.
"Mana dae daer os finen?" I grumble. I have been learning Sindarin at Hadrien's insistence shortly after leaving the Greenwood. Despite my dislike of elves, I have found the skill very useful and my lessons with Hadrien are fun.
A sigh escapes Hadrien's lips as he looks over at me, "Could you try not sounding angry when you use Sindarin?" A giggle escapes Tauriel at my chastisement. "You sound so disgruntled every time we speak that sometimes I think I am teaching a dwarf."
"A true dwarf would hardly aspire to learn such a flowery language," I say snarkily.
"Some of them did once," he says with a thoughtful shrug. "May have been just to know what "the enemy" was saying, but they did." The face he made when he said the enemy got a chuckle out of both Tauriel and I.
"The elven language is beautiful and very romantic according to most," says Tauriel. "I'm certain that knowing it would manage to impress any suitor."
"If a talent in tongues is all it takes to impress, I fear that I will need harsher criteria," I snort. When I look over and see the mischievous look on Hadrien's face I suddenly realize what he might have seen in my words. He opens his mouth, clearly prepared to tease me to an early grave, but I cut him off.
"Not a word!" I shout. He is still smiling and looks back at Tauriel instead. It only takes me a moment to realize why he even looked at her…
"Of course tongues are impressive, but the true criterion is in the skill of your hands," says Tauriel cheekily. With a groan I lower my head and shake it in mock disappointment. I mostly do it to hide my blush from the obvious innuendo. It is ironic that the first elves I meet that I actually like and care about have absolutely no sense of propriety. Someone must be laughing up on high…
"Well executed, Tauriel," her father says with pride. "Not very subtle, but not obvious either. Anyone who accidentally overheard would have blushed." He looks over at the stone faced elves within hearing range by the entrance to the Elven Path. They are clearly unmoved by Tauriel's comment. "Ignore them. They have no sense of humor."
"Maybe they just don't like your sense of humor," I comment. He rounds on me, his face defines indignant.
"I am hilarious," he asserts. "The rest of my kind is just unfortunate enough to be born without a humorous bone in their body."
"The same could be said for Thoronenc," chuckles Tauriel. I give her a sharp glance, but I have to concede. Humor isn't one of my stronger traits. Perhaps every once in a while I can get a good one, but with Hadrien and Tauriel around I keep finding myself out done. I rarely try any more.
"Oh woe is me," I huff. She smiles back brightly. The warmth in her face fills my heart and I almost feel content. Knowing we would be visiting for a few days makes me…happy. It has been so long since I felt like this. Hadrien has added an element of joy to my life, but now with all three of us together like this…it almost feels like being home.
Suddenly, Hadrien's arms are thrown over our shoulders as he pulls us close. "Let's go set up camp and leave these humorless peacocks to their preening." This comment unleashed a mirthful snort from me. "If they want to remain the frigid guard dogs they have been trained to be, we will take our fun elsewhere."
We left Mirkwood behind us as we rode off. Tauriel and I end up sharing the mare I had at the time. Since there is no rush anywhere right now we allow our horses to keep a rather slow pace. In fact, it is slow enough that Tauriel manages to rest her head on my shoulder. If ever there had been a moment of peace where I had felt nearly whole after my parent's death, it was then.
Despite reaching the foothills around midday, we do not enter just yet. Thorin and Dwalin agree that we should try to collect what we can before going on. Our small camp is once more sheltered by the rocks, but we don't rely on it like a shield. If anything we are more wary of that than open plains before us. At least in that direction we can see when we are attacked. The rocks have the capability of hiding our enemies should they appear, but for now at least we have somewhere to run regardless of where the attack comes from.
Bombur and Bofur work on the last stew we will be able to have for a while. I have no doubt that Thorin will have us sleeping on the path along the rocks and regardless of the kindling Gloin is collecting there won't likely be enough to have a cooking fire every night. There might be enough just to keep a low burn on the campfire for whoever is on watch until we can find more wood in the stone hills.
Bifur, Fili, and Kili are doing their best with finding the last bits of meat we will find for a while amongst the plains. The only meat we could try to collect in the mountains would be off of larger predators, like mountain lions. It makes me worry slightly that I can't physically see my friends, but I know they're out there and close enough to reach if trouble should find us. Oin is with Dori and Ori, looking for more last minute additions to the herb stores.
Nori is up in a tree, keeping a look out for any trouble. Both Balin and Bilbo have taken advantage of Thorin's generosity to stop early by sleeping. Balin had still been a little worse for wear when we left Rivendell so we happily gave him the advantage of an opportunity to rest. Bilbo has also been a little worn as well so I offered him the chance to rest. I'm not sure if Thorin would agree with my decision, but I don't care too much. The company has everything under control and who would say no to rest in a moment a peace in daylight like this?
I feel a little bad for Bilbo. The pace has been grueling as of late, but this time there is no pony to carry him. Even if we did we would have more problems than just feeding and watering them; especially if the goblins decide to make an appearance. He looks peaceful as he sleeps and that is enough for now. Luckily, though it seems like most of the company is far more accepting of him after the troll incident. I may have been the one to slay the trolls, but Bilbo started to buy time before I attacked. The Ur family has been exceptionally welcoming and Ori no longer holds back any questions he may have for the hobbit. Fili and Kili had been welcoming to begin with, but now they would throw both Bilbo and I into their little huddles regularly.
Dwalin and Thorin are taking to their weapons with whetstones and speaking in Khazdul. I am close to falling asleep myself, lying down on my bed roll. The sunlight warms me and the continuous sounds of the whetstone brushing metal lulls me. As time passes it becomes harder to keep my senses heightened. That's probably why I can say I am surprised when Fili and Kili came tumbling out of the brush and land on top of me. My first instinct is to wrap my arms around their necks, but when I do it only causes them to struggle harder. I'm worried that their flailing limbs will hit one of the others; so to allow Bilbo and Balin a little more time to rest, I let them go. Once free they shake off my attack looking not the least bit put out. I lay back down and they take up kneeling positions on either side of my bed roll to stare down at me.
"What do you want?" I ask sleepily.
"We found some mushrooms," starts Kili.
"They must be interesting indeed. Considering you went to go get rabbits," I say sarcastically. I emit a yawn before continuing, "Where's Bif?"
In answer to my question the dwarf emerges from the forest carrying half a dozen rabbits. It would seem the hunting had been a great success. He gives a nod indicating he must have heard me. I give him a half hearted wave notice my little audience around me will not let me rest.
"Can you tell us what they are?" asks Kili eagerly.
"Why don't you wait until Oin gets back? The answers he'll give you may be even more accurate than mine," I groan. They nestle even closer.
"But if they are good we can put them in the stew now," says Fili maturely. "Come on, Kalar. You know adding a little flavor to the dish wouldn't hurt anyone. Not to mention Bilbo would probably love you forever if you did."
"However, it would help if we knew these aren't going to poison us," adds Kili.
With a sigh I open my hand and let Kili drop a mushroom into it. I hold it over my face and examine it thoroughly. The brown top coloring of the spores, white flesh, and the relative size of the thing has me leads me to believe it's a cloaked shroom. The number of pines in the area and the season lead me to this conclusion as well.
"This is a Cloaked Mushroom; this will go well with the soup if you have any more of that exact kind. Be careful if you see any that are slightly different, ask me. Some of those species have the tendency to make digestion difficult." Kili gives an enthusiastic nod and takes his pile of mushrooms to Bombur. Fili steps up with a small pile of his own.
"And this one?" asks Fili.
He hands me a white puff ball type mushroom with no stem and a very large cap. I know that there are two like this; one being safe the other not. The problem is that I can't tell them apart and I don't know what season they grow in. Better safe than sorry.
"I think that one's poisonous. Better get rid of it," I say. Fili turns to bury the bad mushrooms so that no one will get a hold of them. The warm sunlight feels good on my skin and I can feel myself stretching out like a cat. Kili returns first and settles down next to me. He lies down against the hard earth and settles his hands behind his head.
"Tell us more," says Kili. "About what happened after the fall of Imelkane."
I look him in the eyes and consider his request. I don't think I have the heart or strength to tell him what happened after my father and I entered those mountains. The suffering we endured in the Halls of Gundabad, surrounded by orcs day in and day out. The way my mother died…the way my father died…
"Some of my tale is too dark for a day as bright as this," I tell him cautiously. "However, I could tell you about my remaining family, my time with the rangers, anything after…What would you like to hear?"
"Why did you leave the rangers?" asks Fili who rests on his side opposite Kili. His hand is props his head up so he can look down at me slightly. I can hear the rhythmic moves of the whetstone have slowed and the hushed conversation among the Ur family has mostly ceased.
"I didn't leave. I was banished," I respond nonchalantly.
"Banished?!" asks Kili. The surprise on his face mirrors his brothers. "Why?!"
I groan a little and regret having said 'anything after'. I sigh, "We had been hunting a large pack of orcs along the eastern border of Mirkwood. We managed to corner them, but to our surprise they took to the wood. Most were too afraid to enter. However, a few of us were too caught up in the chase and we entered to collect our quarry."
I pause a moment, shifting uncomfortably under the gaze of the brothers, "There were about five us. Most of them turned back after the first few yards, but Ethon and I kept going."
"Ethon?" inquires Fili.
"A suitor?" whispers Kili with a teasing grin. Yes, actually…
"Just a friend," I answer.
"In a way?" asks Kili with wiggling brows.
"We were partners in all of our tasks as rangers. He was always by my side," I say. "And while I think of him fondly I couldn't stay. My banishment made it hard to maintain our friendship."
"If he followed you everywhere, why wasn't he with you when we found you?" asks Fili.
"His training wasn't complete and mine was. I begged him to remain with them until he did and it was only at my insistence that he stayed. It's likely his training is complete by now, but with how often I move he likely can't find me."
"Do you want him to find you?" asks Fili with a sad look in his eye. I am a little confused at Fili's sad tone. I just let it roll off my shoulders.
"Maybe one day," I smile. "Having all of you reminds me just how welcome company can be on the road and how much I miss my other friends." Fili looks away. His face is contorted as if he is angry.
"Keep going," says Kili anxiously. "You and Ethon were still tracking the orcs."
"We actually lost each other after a few minutes in. I kept charging forward while Ethon had stopped to look for me. According to him, our commander himself came and got him, but he wanted to come after me. After an hour or so, I managed to catch up with the orcs. Cocky bastards thought that they could walk freely through the woods after we stopped at the tree line. I got them all, but when all was said and done I realized I was lost," I shiver a little at the memory.
"Like an ignorant child I thought I could just walk straight back the way I came. So I started walking. It went on for hours and after a while the air became so heavy with dark magic that I felt like I was drowning. I couldn't think straight and everything looked different from when I had entered. Nothing really interesting happened for a couple days; I was just dehydrated and starving in the woods, terrified of everything that moved. However, the magic in the air gave me visions of the death of my parents and my fellow rangers calling out to me. It was a living hell for me and while I still would rather walk through the Black Gates I'm better prepared now. I can face those dangers with you."
I can see the smiles on the brother's faces at my words. The same vision that filled my mind the night we left Rivendell has remained a constant companion when I wonder if I should leave. I would stay, I would protect them. I have to.
"So the rangers cast you out for disobeying orders? Or was it because they thought you were mad?" asks Dwalin. He's still leaning over his axes with a whetstone in hand, but his eyes are on me.
"No," I answer. "I was banished for murder." Again everyone hangs in suspense especially the two Ri brothers who have reemerged with Oin. Before anyone can say anything I jump to my own defense. "On my last day in the woods an elvish patrol watched me from a distance. They thought I was dangerous so they thought it best to wait until I collapsed from exhaustion so they could return me to my troop. Unfortunately, one of the elves had brought his daughter along."
"When she saw me stumbling around in the woods she felt bad for me, she didn't want me to suffer. So when the patrol went after a nest of giant spiders she approached me. She tried to talk to me, but when I saw her my mind was such a mess. I perceived everything as a threat. In my mind's eye she looked like an orc even though there was nothing further from the truth. So when she came within an arm's length…I ran her through."
I take a deep breath, "I had expected black blood to stain my blade so I was only startled out of my trance when I saw red. Once I realized what I had done…it was too late. I was…collected by the patrol and brought before the Elvenking." I purposefully skirt around some of the details, worried that Thorin would use them as an excuse to keep me from going with them. "After the Elvenking released me to my troop I was told that I would only be allowed to stay to complete my training before I would be expulsed. And that's exactly what happened."
I sit up, taking note that everyone has returned to camp and must have heard the end of my story. I look over at Balin who is now awake and watching me with a sad look in his eyes. I wouldn't blame him if it turned out to be disappointment.
"You asked me, Balin, about the state of the wood," I say. "I gave you my answer and I stand by it. It's not good, but I won't let that happen again; my mask will make sure of that." I then shift my gaze to Thorin who is staring back intensely. "That's why I am going with you. To make sure the rest of you stay safe; from both the woods and each other."
(My Horrible) Translations:
Thoronenc = our eagle.*
Savni dae idhrad. = I have missed you both so much.
Ahm idharadh, elenen = We have missed you too, my star.
Thoronen, fingen galaeden = my eagle, you have grown out your hair.
Mana dae daer os finen? = What is so great about my hair?
*I about died when I saw the elvish word for eagle was Thoron. It's way too close to Thorin for me to not use it.
Next time: Couple more flash backs and Thorin POV…maybe some Stone Giants
Also just so you know I love and appreciate everyone who looks through my work. It brings me a lot of happiness to talk about it, especially when those closest to me don't really care about it. It's fine - I get it, not everyone is into it, but thank you guys again for being here and making my day and work worth it. See you in two weeks…