"You alright?" she nodded,
"Diggle had mentioned the fact that maybe you were feeling a little left out."
"What?" She tried to feign confusion, even if she wasn't high, she wouldn't have succeeded. "No!" She glared at Diggle I'm coming for you, and you will regret this!
"I was just used to being your girl. I mean not your girl girl. Your girl. I know it sounds like the same word but it means something different in my head."
He cupped her cheek, "hey" she opened her eyes,
"You will always be my girl, Felicity"
Diggle drove Felicity home, hoping she would sleep tonight. It had been a tough week for her and he just hoped she wasn't in too much pain.
"You know John. I wasn't happy with you."
"Oh yeah?" He chuckled under his breath at her inability to pronounce her words.
"Yeah. I wasn't happy you told Oliver I was sad. I promise it wasn't just Sara. It hurt that he slept with Isobel, when she mocks me already. She was always a bitch before, but now it's like she's the bitch with him wrapped around her finger. Well so she thinks. And then he said it was only because he couldn't be with someone he cares about. But now he's with Sara!" She stopped to breathe, and as if her brain needed to catch up with the words that tumbled out her mouth. Diggle didn't know Oliver had slept with Isobel, but he was damn well sure his friend would know he knows now!
"I like Sara. She's cool. Badass. I just wish I could be more like Sara, she's so... talented."
Never in his life did John Diggle ever think that he would hear Felicity say she wanted to be like someone else because they were talented. Felicity was the most talented person he'd ever known and in ways he didn't know a person could be.
"So obviously he lied to me. Because Sara cares and he cares about Sara. It's okay, I mean I never thought he'd be with me, but I don't like that he lied to me John. Not after all this." Her voice quickened the more she spoke and her head flung back and forth like she didn't know what to do with it.
"So, it wasn't just because I was lonely. Digg, he lied to me!" She looked him dead in the face as he pulled up to her apartment. She may have only just had oxycodone but he saw more truth and clarity in those blue eyes than he had in months.
"He lied to me and then he got Sara, and then Sara can do everything, and Sara didn't get shot and Sara didn't get kidnapped by the Count and Sara can do computers and Sara wasn't the one who built the computer firewall that's supposed to keep us safe and didn't and Sara can make him happy and Sara can be with him and Sara can do biology and look amazing and get bad guys and Sara has loads of scars. He lied to me and then he found someone to replace me."
During her rambling Diggle got out of the car and went to Felicity's side. By the time she had finished he was hugging her and stroking her hair. He took her face in his hands.
"Felicity, what happened with the Count, that scared him. So yeah, he has been more distant. Oliver would never want to replace you. Never! I don't think he lied to you Felicity, I've seen him with Sara and yes, he cares about her. As a friend. As an important part of his past. As a guilty burden which he has carried with him for 5 years. But he hasn't given his heart to her, and we both know that."
As Felicity went to say something, Diggle took her hands in his and looked deep into her eyes,
"Felicity, you will always be his girl!"
Diggle knew Felicity cared for Oliver, and that Oliver cared for Felicity. It was obvious and had been for a long time. Even just after Felicity was recruited, with the Dodger case, Oliver seemed to put more pressure upon himself when Felicity was in that collar, even going up to a man and stealing his bike as Oliver Queen, for her. The huntress. They had only just began working together, and yet the woman who Oliver couldn't seem to admit was a criminal, shot his mother, threatened his family and attacked his best friend was suddenly a prime target after only tying Felicity up. Alonso had a full casino full of men, it was highly dangerous to go in there as the vigilante, and yet after Felicity was simply given a warning and her ear piece was taken out, he charged in there, murder on his mind, despite all the risks against him. When they went into Merlyn Global, the chance that Felicity was going to simply be made, even though Diggle was there nearly made him blow his own cover against Malcolm and his sister, despite the low risk. The earthquake, Oliver was willing to let Diggle come into the eye of the storm, didn't check on Laurel, didn't question his sister's safety, and yet was determined that Felicity shouldn't even be in the reinforced building, even before the earthquake started. Even after it did begin, he grabbed Diggle and immediately checked on Felicity. On the Island, Oliver didn't even want to risk Diggle trying to disarm the landmine, giving away his own location to swoop in and save her. When the masked gunmen came into his office so soon after that, clearly not intending on hurting Felicity, he immediately left all the other people there and without thought, grabbed Felicity and left and checked on her as soon as they landed. Barton Mathis was killing girls, Lance had specifically asked for their help, they had a solid plan and still Oliver was reluctant to let Felicity in the field. When she was taken, he shot Mathis without thought, and even let him run so he could check on Felicity, who had only been touched by Mathis, leaving only when Diggle arrived, even then still reluctant. Then there was the Count. He left his own mother's trial to go to her, and at the thought of the Count touching her, allowing her a taste of Vertigo, he shot the man with 3 arrows, propelling him to a violent death despite the fact he could have simply incapacitated the man. Even though he was the reason for Vertigo plaguing the city, even though his sister nearly had jail time because of it and was in a car crash, even though he had made the choice long ago to let him live, despite his crimes, the second he touched Felicity, he was a dead man.
Sara may have been his girlfriend, Laurel may have been his future for a time, Helena may have been his chance at salvation and Mckenna may have been the positive connection to his past that he'd longed for. And yet, the petit blonde currently sprawled along her bed making the noises of a walrus in her sleep, John knew she was his girl.