Author's Note: I had a completely different idea for the second chapter…but it felt so rushed, and I felt like I needed to set up the story a bit more so I scrapped it. Hopefully this keeps your interest, I promise that the next couple chapters will start bringing our lovebirds back together and get the main story rolling. As always, thank you for reading my first work. It's been exponentially helpful with me world building in outside writing. Reviews are great, appreciate you all! Much love. -Greenwitch94

Sakura clicked 'submit' on the hospital's scheduling system and leaned back, feeling assured. Her paperwork was done, her nurses had turned in their reports, and the patient list was relatively low. A nice change of pace as the last month had been pretty steady. Sakura signed herself on for doubles Friday and Saturday with Sunday morning off so she could sleep before coming back that evening. Tomorrow was her twenty-eighth birthday, the first birthday she'd have to spend without Kakashi and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't shake the ache that took over. She had felt it during the summer, on his birthday, and over the holidays. She wondered if she would ever get past this feeling of loss, or would she think about the life she wanted with him for years?

Clapping her hands together to pull herself out her mind she rifled through her stacks of papers, organizing them by name and pushed the thoughts of him away. She convinced herself that keeping busy at work would preoccupy her. She could even spend her down time looking over the budget even though it technically wasn't due to be reviewed until next month. But why put it off until then when she had time now?

Pushing herself away from her desk she decided to go for a short stroll to stretch her legs before she did her final check in with her nurses, so she could head home. Sakura was in a cheery mood today, which was rare. She had slept well once she had returned home from a late-night dessert run with Jax, the new dermatologist that had been hired on about six months after her and Kakashi's breakup. He had recently moved to Konoha from Waterfall where he had graduated top of his class. He was handsome, witty, friendly, and unashamedly gay which made Sakura completely comfortable with him. Ever since she hit the age of 21 and stopped being so awkward she found herself with many male "friends", but sooner than later their ulterior motives came to the surface. It wasn't like that with Jax, and even better he wasn't a ninja and didn't know anyone in her previous circles. He had become her confidante and a close friend due to his shared experience of having have gone through a breakup recently. She divulged that she had been the doctor attending to a traumatic accident which led to the disintegration of her relationship. She hadn't offered anything else and Jax didn't pressure her for more info. They bonded over their shared love for desserts and fried foods, and the fact that they were plagued with insomnia. What started with late night phone calls turned to late night walks to grab dango and taiyaki.

Speak of the devil, she turned the corner to find him standing with some of his colleagues who were going over a chart. He caught her eye and gave her a small wave. His colleague turned his gaze from him to their other peer, Jax used that break in contact to tap his wrist and motion out the door, asking what time she was off. She smiled and held up two fingers and twisted one in the air to show she had doubles Friday and Saturday. He rolled his eyes, putting his thumb and pinky in the shape of a phone, signaling he'd call her at the end of his shift. She nodded and waved as she continued on her stroll. As she strode down the brightly lit hallway circling back to her wing, she felt comforted by the familiar background noise: custodians changing sheets, nurses talking with patients and amongst themselves, the steady beep of monitors and clicking of keyboards. The peace, however, was interrupted when she saw Tsunade's favorite delivery girl hovering around the nurse's station by her office. Her name was Chiyo and she was a cute girl, probably thirteen or fourteen. Her brother was a ninja but she had opted for a civilian life. When Sakura looked into her eyes she was thankful for that, there was so much innocence there. War and missions would've ruined her.

"Hello Chiyo-chan, do you have a message for me?"

The cheerful girl flashed a smile before handing her a scroll,

"Here you go Sakura-sama."

The girl turned to give Sakura some privacy with her note but waited just in case she was needed to relay one back. The scroll was short with a simple sentence written out in Tsunade's handwriting,

"Come see me at the Tower. I want to discuss some things."

-Tsunade

She groaned internally before turning back to Chiyo,

"I need to answer this in person, thank you for bringing this by Chiyo-chan."

The girl waved and skipped off down the hall to continue with her day. Before she even reached Hokage Tower she knew what Tsunade wanted to talk to her about. The schedule and it "conflicting" with her birthday. For the past month, Tsunade and Shizune had been pestering her about making plans for the day, going as far as to suggest she take a four-day weekend and go to this new spa that was all the rage. Sakura had politely declined and eventually started skirting around the conversation all together.

Arriving to Tsunade's office the door was already open, Sakura tapped on the frame to signal her arrival before walking in smiling at Shizune. Tsunade merely glanced up and gestured for her to sit.

"Shizune is taking your Friday doubles and I'm taking Saturday. Mako will cover your morning shift for Sunday. You know…you can't promote someone to lead nurse and then not give them the opportunity to actually LEAD rounds. She was so excited when I told her she'd finally be doing it Sunday."

Sakura only blinked in response before looking over at Shizune who's face bore no signs of remorse. Well, Tsunade hadn't wasted any time and made it clear to the young pinkette that she wasn't going to argue with her about this. Sakura sat in front of her mentor clutching at the folders she had in her arms, using them as anchors to keep her cool in check. Heat began rising to her face and she was unsure if she wanted to punch something or burst into tears, maybe both. She then wondered how she had even found out but then felt annoyed with herself for even thinking Tsunade would have revoked her access to the hospital system. She may have passed the position to Sakura, but she was still Hokage and a medical ninja first. The hospital was her livelihood and she was going to be connected to it until the day she died. Inhaling sharply to regain her composure, Sakura replied as calmly as she could,

"But…Tsunade-shishou…I can't expect you to take on Hokage duties and the hospital…that would be absurd."

The blonde's eyes narrowed, unaffected by her mentee's lackluster attempt at manipulation,

"No what's absurd is not taking a single FULL day off in over a year. How you're not dead on your feet is beyond me. It's your birthday and you're not stepping foot in this damn hospital until Sunday night."

Sakura's brows bunched together but before she could counter, Tsunade stretched her hands behind her head, leaning back,

"Plus, I won't be doing both, even though I'm completely capable of doing it all. Naruto is stepping in this next week so we can get soft feel for what he's learned so far. I'll be here for guidance, but he's done…exceptional. I don't imagine I'll be needed."

Tsunade stood, making her way to the door of her office,

"Now if you'll excuse us, I haven't eaten since last night and I am starving," she looked over her shoulder to Shizune who was already following her, "I'm feeling a hotpot, what about you?"

Sakura was on their tail, attempting to continue her protest only for Tsunade to turn around, facing her young mentee. Tsunade knew that the accident last year weighed heavily on Sakura, but she also knew it wasn't the only thing that created this lifeless woman filled with grief. Sakura had always been capable and efficient, but she had also been vivacious and social and seeing her turn into the robotic person she stared at now was upsetting to say the least. Placing a gentle hand on her shoulder she softened her tone,

"Sakura. I've been where you are. And I refuse to let you turn out like me," Sakura's eyes widened, "Don't waste your youth in that office. You are a bright person; I couldn't have passed the hospital to someone better. But you are still young. Holing yourself up is a waste and I want you to understand that."

She didn't give Sakura any time to respond before she turned and made her way down the hall with Shizune who began gabbing up a storm about some gossip she had heard from a unit returning from Waterfall. News of her free weekend spread quickly and when she found herself closing her office door a few nurses waved at her and smiled,

"Have a happy birthday Sakura-sama!"

"We'll make sure everything is in top shape!"

"Have fun and don't think about us, we got it!"

The words comforted her slightly as she stepped out of the building. She really was lucky to have a staff that worked so fluidly with one another, with very little drama ever surfacing. She could tell their well wishes had been genuine, and not just happy jabs about her leaving work for the weekend.

She walked home a little slower than usual, thinking of what to make for dinner only to realize she hadn't grocery shopped in at least three weeks so anything in her fridge wasn't fit for human consumption. Coming up to the part of the road where it split right towards Sakura's house and left to town, she turned left to find somewhere to order a dinner to go. She could've easily gone for a bowl of shrimp soba from Ichiraku but she wasn't going to risk it. So, she walked up to her usual, Roll, and sat at the sushi counter putting in an order for mako sashimi and two softshell crab rolls. She thought about ordering a bottle of sake until she heard a familiar voice call her name and turned to see Ino and Hinata waving her over to their table where they were sitting with Shikamaru and Sai,

"Sakura! We were just over at your house!"

The beautiful Hyuuga exclaimed happily as Sakura sat in a chair that Sai pulled up for her. She smiled at her friends as she looked around the table. Shikamaru seemed happier than usual which was great since he and Temari had a pretty nasty breakup around Christmas time. He had always been one to keep to himself but after she had returned to Sand, he seemed even more melancholy, choosing to hole himself up in his house. Ino was looking at her with eyes filled with suspicion, concern, and annoyance a mixture typical of her blonde friend. And then Sai was, well, Sai. It was clear he was happy she was there but in his own, quiet, monotone way. Ino broke the silence with a cough,

"We heard that Hokage-sama had to take your shifts from you, so you weren't working on your birthday. What the hell, Forehead!"

Usually something like this would fuel her annoyance but for some reason she felt a smile creep up on her. She couldn't remember the last time she had sat down with her friends to talk that didn't involve business or a crunched schedule. And looking around that them, the sad realization dawned on her that she knew very little of what was going on with their lives outside of the general information that floated about the village. Hinata and Neji were working on merging the branch and head houses but that was all she knew of it. And she knew that Hinata and Naruto had decided to take a break from their relationship so Hinata could focus on the politics of her clan and Naruto on his training for Hokage. But that had been last June, had they reconciled since then?

Ino and Sai were starting to come back to the land of the living now that their son, Kai, was turning four this year. Kai had been born the year Sakura took over head of the hospital and Ino refused to take him to a pediatrician, dead set on Sakura being the only doctor to see him. He was an amiable baby who just wanted to stay up and play for hours which caused Sai and Ino to slowly lose their minds. Yes, they were ninja but surviving on 3-4 hours of sleep a night for months on end took its toll on damn near anyone. Now he was starting preschool but Sakura knew nothing else. Was he showing any skill with ninja? Did Ino even want him to go down that path? Guilt took over as she swallowed the fact that in her grief she had isolated herself from people who loved her and cared for her deeply. Hinata seemed to notice the gears in Sakura's head turning and she piped up to pull her from her thoughts,

"When we heard the news, we came over to see if you wanted to come to dinner, but you weren't home yet. Lucky us!"

Ino chuckled as the server came up from behind Sakura and placed her to-go bag on the table. Feeling the four's eyes on her she reached into the brown paper sack, unpacking her rolls and reaching for the chopsticks in the bottom. Hinata seemed to breathe out a sigh of relief and Ino's shoulders eased up,

"With it being your birthday, we figured we could take you out for brunch or something? Me, Hinata, Tenten, Temari, and Kurenai. What do you say?"

If hearing his ex's name stung him at all, Shikamaru's face revealed nothing. He was either truly over it or he was truly an expert at keeping his cool. It could be both honestly, Shika had never been prone to outbursts. Looking into Hinata's lavender eyes, an eager smile on her face, there was a zero chance that she could say no now, in fact it sounded nicer than the plans she had laid out for herself-which was trash TV and working through her laundry mountain.

"That sounds really fun. I'm in…but, Temari is in town? What for?"

The table turned to look Shikamaru's way and he answered plainly,

"Her and Gaara are coming in actually. They have a meeting with Tsunade and Naruto, I'm not sure what they are discussing but it's important if both of them are making an appearance."

Curious but not really concerned she simply nodded, making a mental note to ask Tsunade about it on Monday. The five of them finished their dinner relatively quick with Sai and Ino being the first to leave, rushing off to pick up their son from Chouji's. Shikamaru ordered another bottle of sake and spoke with Sakura about her work and a couple cases of ANBU that had come in. Apparently, he had decided to take a break from missions and was working with the academy and he was being assigned his first genin group in the fall. Sakura's brows raised at that,

"I would never have thought you'd go for taking on genin…are you excited for it?"

Hinata tipped his bottle over, filling up his last cup,

"I needed the break. I think we all do at some point."

The words did not fall deaf on Sakura's ears as she met his gaze and felt like a chastened child. He was right, everyone had their breaking points. Sasuke had his and the village had witnessed him crawling back. Kakashi's life was spiraling out of control before he was reassigned to take genin. She wondered what happened the past year that would inspire Shika to do something so out of character. She watched as he drank the last of his sake in one gulp, putting a few bills on the table,

"Have fun at brunch tomorrow. See you around, Sakura-chan."

And finally, it was just Hinata and Sakura. She looked up to her shy friend and sighed,

"Are you going to lecture me now too?"

Hinata simply shook her head and took her hand to reach for Sakura's,

"Not at all. I just wanted to remind you that you have friends who want to be there for you. I know after you woke up last year things got so hard. I know that's why you've been at the hospital so much."

Sakura lowered her eyes, scared of the vulnerability, scared to look any longer and let the tears she'd been holding back all day fall. Hinata squeezed her friend's hand tighter and gave her a moment to collect herself. Sakura sniffled after about a minute and looked up; her eyes bloodshot from the tears forming. Hinata let go of her hand and smoothed out the dress on her lap suddenly feeling shy all over again,

"I…I just don't want you to feel like you need to go through this alone. I know you're capable of handling so much. You take care of so many people in your life and profession. I just don't want you going day to day without someone taking care of you too, you know?"

Sakura and Hinata packed up after their emotional conversation and parted ways at the edge of town. The way she had spoken to her with such gentle conviction had Sakura stewing over the words the rest of the evening, even after she had showered, forced herself to do at least one basket of laundry, and tucked into bed.

I just don't want you to feel like you need to go through this alone…

She hadn't been alone until now, even in her most pathetic state she had never been alone. Even when Sasuke had tried to kill her multiple times, she had never been abandoned. Naruto had been there to ease the pain, and Ino when her girlish emotions were too much for the guys to handle, and eventually Kakashi when she became an adult. Tsunade had been a surrogate mother to her even though she was brash and at times so filled with pent up grief she couldn't recognize Sakura from a sake bottle. The two women understood each other and found strength that worked for them. But now, she looked at her daily life and felt the emptiness this past year had brought. Ino was a mom and kunoichi, successful and busy. Hinata was working through heavy clan orders with Neji. She barely saw Naruto with all his training, Sasuke was gone, and she had buried herself so much in work that interacting with Tsunade or Shizune was always strictly business. Lying in her bed she felt a different kind of grief that had plagued her this past year, why did she let the tragedy mar her ability to connect? Yes. She was alone, and it was her doing. She forced herself to close her eyes and begged for sleep to find her.