There was nothing he could do to bring Sam back to life.

Dean had gone over everything he could find, twice, three times, even four times for some of them, and he couldn't find a single hint of what he could use to bring his sister back to life.

He could feel the despair choking him with each moment that that realization set in. It took everything he had not to throw everything in front of him onto the ground.

He rubbed his hand over his face, not breathing for a moment as he tried to compose himself.

There had to be something. There had to be something that he overlooked or didn't look at enough. There had to be some sort of artifact or scroll in the bunker, there had to be some witch out there or reaper that would work with him.

There had to be anything, at all, out there. There had to be something, there had to be-

"Dean?" came the last voice that he ever wanted to hear. The kid was back in the room, walking along the wall and trying to keep his distance. "Dean-"

Dean snapped, there was no other word for it. Filled with the despair of knowing that he couldn't do a single thing to bring his sister back and saddled with Lucifer's child, made him crack and he came forward, grabbing the kids shirt, pulling his arm back, and punching him in the face, letting him fall out of his grip.

The kid was on the ground, staring up at him with wide eyes and shaking, tremors running through him hard. His nose looked broken for a moment before it healed, however blood there was still the blood that had dripped down. He moved slowly, wiping under his nose and smearing the blood away.

Dean focused on the blood, he couldn't tear his eyes away from it. It was Lucifer's blood. His tainted, disgusting, revolting, sickening, stomach churning-

Sams blood.

It was Sams blood too. Half Sam, half his sister, half their blood.

Winchester blood.

Dean breathed out heavily, straightening up slightly as he kept staring at the blood that was staining the kids face and hand. It looked completely human, no hint of a single bit of angel grace.

Dean finally looked away from the blood and at the kids face, the kid flinched away from his gaze and looked down at the ground, his hair falling in front of his face.

Dean felt his legs shake slightly and he leaned back against the table for support, placing his palms on them and ignoring how his knuckles were smarting from punching the kid.

He couldn't stop looking at the kid, maybe really looking for the first time, at the kid for a long silent moment. The kid seemed to curl away from his gaze but otherwise didn't move, still shaking and maybe a bit afraid of moving too much and having Dean's ire on him again.

The kid had shaggy hair, a corner of his mind told him. It was moved forward with his head almost covering his face completely. He had a few moles that Sam had as well, same places as well. He was tall, almost able to look Dean in the eye, if he ever did that but he hadn't done it since the first day.

He was lanky and he was thin, he could remember the kid that did eat but he had said a few days ago that they were running low on supplies and he hasn't done anything to resupply it.

Despite himself he could pick out bits and pieces of Sam there.

Breathing out hard Dean pushed himself off of the table and ignored how the kid flinched and curled more into himself as he came closer. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief.

Not stopping his walk towards the garage, he needed to get out and he might as well get more things for their kitchen, he tossed the handkerchief onto the kids lap and continued walking.

He couldn't label how he was feeling, he couldn't figure it out. He could feel a multitude of emotions coursing through him and he didn't bother to name any of them, he didn't need that extra baggage.

As he got into his impala, flexing his fingers over the steering wheel, he breathed out slowly, unable to get the image of the kid sprawled on the ground, bloodied because of him.

He looked at his knuckles that were still hurting slightly, seeing the kids blood on them, small specks that managed to land on his skin.

He brought a hand to his chest slowly, feeling it shake hard. His other hand came up to cling at it and his thumb moved over the blood on his knuckles, smearing it slightly and taking a deep breath.

The kids blood. Sams blood. Their blood.

Dean closed his eyes, curling over his hands and just holding them close to his chest. A choked sound escaped him as the shaking spread through his body.

"Sam." he whispered, his voice breaking. "Sammy...I don't know how to save you. I don't know what to do."

He let his head fall back against the seat, feeling the tears starting to gather in his eyes. His entire body was shaking and he wasn't able to keep the small sounds from escaping him.

"Sammy." he managed to get out. "What do I do?"

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