Author's note: I may have screwed up the timeline, but to be honest, trying to figure it out is making me even more confused. (Good job, Allys, good job.) Here is my logic: The prophecy was made before Harry was born (so before July 31, 1980), and Harry was a year and three months old when Pettigrew betrayed the Potters to Voldemort. I doubt Voldemort would have waited long before acting, because what he knew of the prophecy had him all freaked out, and Snape would have gone to Dumbledore as soon as Voldy decided to target the Potters. All of this makes me figure that the Potters spent a whole year in hiding (if Snape went to Dumbledore in, say, October or November—in his memories in Deathly Hallows, the way the hilltop scene is described makes it sound like late autumn, because of the "leafless trees"). But then I'm not sure, because there's also the question of at what point Pettigrew became a Death Eater vs. at what point the Potters changed their Secret Keeper. Arrrrrgh. I was ready to scrap this chapter, thinking it took place during a nonexistent year, but I had second thoughts; so I'm going with my initial theory and hoping that I haven't gotten things terribly wrong. (If there were a hair-pulling emoticon, I would insert it here.)

Wow, sorry for the huge ramble. I'm inordinately worked up about this, if you couldn't tell. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy this chapter. Please review!

Guest: I was going to do the sparing Lily part in "real time," but I thought that the whole thing flowed better as retrospect. In general, that tends to be one of the major stylistic things I think about. Thanks again for the review!

Warnings: Swearing

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Order of the Phoenix

It was soon revealed to Severus that he was not only going to spy for Dumbledore, but also pretend to spy for the Dark Lord.

"Why?" he demanded.

"Trust," Dumbledore said simply, unaffected by the younger man's glare. "The more he trusts you, the more likely he will share his plans. Being his spy ensures that you stay in his good books."

Severus was not mollified. "Yes, as long as I'm actually useful to him. Bringing him trivial things like what colour robes you wore on Tuesday will not help him trust me."

"Do not worry about that. I will tell you what to feed him: enough to keep his suspicion at bay, and little enough to prevent damage on our side."

Dumbledore swept on before Severus could come up with another argument.

"You will tell Voldemort"—Severus flinched—"that I interviewed you for a job and decided you are too young to teach at the moment, but that Professor Slughorn is hoping to retire in the not-so-distant future. I've recruited you to help brew potions for the infirmary, to lighten his workload. This will give you an excuse to be traveling to the castle at regular intervals.

"When I inquired into your past and current activities, you convinced me that you've rejected the ways of the Dark Arts and wish to be of service to the opposite side. Your usefulness will come from the fact that you not only managed to find a way into Hogwarts, but also managed to get close to me personally. He will be delighted to think that I have been fooled into trusting you, thus giving him an 'in' into the Light's forces, and will be none the wiser that it is actually the opposite."

Severus pinched the bridge of his nose; Dumbledore's convoluted speech had literally given him a headache.

"To convince both sides of the war that what they see is the truth… I don't know if I can do that."

Dumbledore raised his eyebrows and tilted his head back slightly. "Oh, but you will." He said it so casually that Severus almost wanted to laugh.

There was a pause.

"I would like to ask another thing of you. Have you heard of the Order of the Phoenix?"

"The name isn't familiar."

"Well, no matter. Sherbet lemon?"

Severus blinked, startled. Then he glared at the proffered tin, as though it had personally offended him. Why Dumbledore was offering sweets and how he even knew about the muggle candy, Severus couldn't guess. Just another of the man's many odd tendencies, he supposed.

"No thank you, Headmaster," he said stiffly. "What is the Order of the Phoenix?"

"It's an organization founded by myself that fights against Voldemort. If you have ever been on a foiled raid, it was likely Order members who joined the fray."

He wished that Dumbledore wouldn't use the Dark Lord's name, but he didn't feel comfortable asking him to stop.

"All right. What has this got to do with me?"

"I should have thought it would be obvious, Severus. I want you to join the Order."

Severus's mouth opened, but no words came out. He closed it again. The last time he'd joined a political party—though at the time he hadn't realized it, that was essentially what the Death Eaters were; a particularly violent, prejudiced, and dictatorial political party—it hadn't gone so well. Besides, sitting here tucked away in the office with Dumbledore was quite different from sitting in a roomful of people who wanted to kill anybody with the Dark Mark.

Dumbledore ignored the horrified look on Severus's face. "We are having a meeting in a week, and I expect you to accompany me. It seems logical, does it not? All the more inside information for Voldemort to think that he will receive, all the more pleased with you he will be, all the better you can spy for me."

If he didn't know better, he would have said that Dumbledore was actually trying to get him killed. Maybe he is, whispered a nagging voice in the back of his head.

"I can't go with you! I'm a known Death Eater! Your people kill people like me, it'll be like walking into a hornet's nest!"

"I will tell them that you have reformed. They will accept it."

"But I-"

"This is not up for negotiation, Severus." Dumbledore didn't explicitly bring up the promise of "anything," but it hung in the air.

Another pause.

"Very well, Headmaster."

As Dumbledore had predicted, the Dark Lord was very pleased with Severus—although the way he gloated, you'd think that he himself had gotten Severus the connection with Hogwarts and the Order.

"Ha! He thinks that he is gaining intelligence into my side. He does not realize that it is I who have infiltrated his army!"

The fear that Severus had felt as he waited for Albus Dumbledore on that stormy hilltop paled drastically in comparison to the fear he was experiencing now. If the Dark Lord Legilimized him, he wasn't sure if he could hide the truth. His heart felt like it was trying to burst from his chest. Any moment, the Dark Lord was going to smell a rat and persecute him for being a traitor. He didn't know how the Dark Lord dealt with traitors, but it definitely involved pain, and death, and probably humiliation.

"He is a fool! A naïve fool! By trusting you, I have gained access to him, and he doesn't even know it!"

The Dark Lord continued on in this vein for longer than Severus cared to listen to. He was practically manic; the air around him buzzed with triumphant energy, which only worsened Severus's anxiety.

"Well done, Severus." The other wizard finally concluded his monologue. "I will expect an update from you in two weeks. You are dismissed."

Severus had to fight his relief as he bowed and turned to leave. He was so close to getting away unscathed….

"And Severus."

Shit. He turned, fear surging again when he caught a dangerous glint in the Dark Lord's eyes.

"My Lord?"

"See if you can discern the whereabouts of the Potters. They seem to have disappeared."

"Yes, my Lord."

He closed the door carefully, although what he really wanted to do was slam it and run. The relief came flooding back: relief that the Dark Lord believed his deception, and relief that Dumbledore had kept his end of the bargain.

Lily was safe.

The easy chatter that filled the room turned to stony silence when they caught sight of the black-clad wizard who entered behind Dumbledore. And then, as if things weren't bad enough—

"Snivellus!"

Three of the four Marauders were monopolizing one of the couches.

Ignoring Black, Severus sneered, "I see you still have a flea problem, Lupin." He gestured at Black and Pettigrew. "You know, I've heard that moonlight can sometimes act as a pesticide."

"Severus," Dumbledore warned in a low voice. Then, "Please sit down and put your wand away, Sirius."

Although Black lowered his wand, he remained standing; in the end, Lupin tugged him back down, scowling at the allusion to his lycanthropy.

Severus briefly considered walking out, but decided that it wasn't worth risking Dumbledore's anger.

"I hope that you are going to explain this to us, Albus." Minerva McGonagall's mouth was pressed into a thin, disapproving line, an expression that Severus was familiar with from his years at Hogwarts.

"Of course, Minerva, of course," said Dumbledore, with a smile at his deputy. He addressed the Order at large: "Severus Snape is the newest member of the Order of the Phoenix."

Because that will reassure them.

"But he's a Death Eater!" Black pointed at Severus with his wand. "The greasy git is a bloody Death Eater! He's going to go slithering back to his equally-slimy master and spew all of our secrets!"

"I ask again, Mister Black, that you sit down and put your wand away. Yes, Severus bears the Dark Mark, but he has seen the error of his ways and joined our side. I expect everyone here to treat him with the same respect that you show each other, and to include him in our agreement of confidentiality."

The Order members began to talk amongst themselves. Severus used their distraction to take note of who was present. There were quite a few people whom he'd gone to school with: Sirius Black, of course, and Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew; Marlene McKinnon, and Dorcas Meadowes. Severus assumed that the Potters and the Longbottoms were also members, but absent because they were all in hiding.

"Why should we trust him?" someone called out.

"Because I trust him."

"We need the reason he's defected, Albus," said another wizard, whom Severus recognized as Alastor Moody, one of the most respected Aurors currently in the field. Moody had quite the reputation. "I say we arrest him now, while we've got him here."

"I cannot provide the reason"—Severus let out a breath that he hadn't realized he was holding—"not because I do not know it, but because it isn't mine to share. I assure you, however, that I have not invited him here without plenty of forethought."

As if it wasn't already clear, Black said in frustration, "But he's a Death Eater."

"So was your brother," Severus responded flatly. Regulus Black had disappeared without a trace the previous year. He was presumed dead.

Black paled and was speechless for a moment, but then he turned back to Dumbledore to continue pleading his case. "He's a Death Eaters, and he's Snivellus."

"I will not tolerate name-calling," Dumbledore said sharply. "Severus is joining the Order. That is my final word on the matter. Please, trust my judgement."

There were no more protests, though the majority still looked upset, Black and Moody most of all.

"Have a seat, Severus, and we will begin the meeting."

Severus glanced around, wondering if he could just lurk in a corner somewhere. He was good at lurking in corners.

To his immense surprise, McGonagall conjured a chair and placed it next to hers. It was obviously meant for him, and there was no way to sit somewhere else without insulting her, and Severus did not want to get on McGonagall's bad side; he gave her an awkward nod of thanks as he sat down, which she acknowledged with a raised eyebrow. She no longer looked disapproving, more like she had sized him up and was still in the process of determining her opinion.

Eyes reluctantly went to Dumbledore as he began to speak. For the most part, people stayed attentive to what was being said, but they did continue sneaking wary glances or glares at Severus throughout the meeting.

It was a very long hour.

Being the Dark Lord's spy propelled Severus through the ranks of the Death Eaters, much to the disgruntlement of some. It was March now, and the Dark Lord had yet to figure out that one of his supposedly-loyal followers had been double-crossing him since October. He had used Legilimency on Severus several times, but Severus had managed to prevent him from picking up on anything unusual. This was only due to some divine intervention, Severus thought, because he was a nervous wreck inside. He felt like "TRAITOR" appeared on his forehead every time he had to see the Dark Lord or interact with the other Death Eaters.

So far, though, so good. He actually did end up doing some brewing for the Hogwarts infirmary, so that part of his cover story had become true; and any time he was questioned about seeming more reticent than usual—always by Lucius—he dismissed it as being preoccupied with a new potion or spell that was giving him trouble.

Not surprisingly, the Order never completely accepted Severus's presence, although the atmosphere did thaw. While some, like Sirius Black and Alastor Moody, never stopped being vocal about their dislike—both regularly received stern lectures from Dumbledore—others, like Minerva McGonagall and Elphias Doge, seemed willing to accept him because they trusted the Headmaster.

The Prewett twins, Gideon and Fabian, had also seemed inclined to put their faith in Dumbledore and accept Severus. Until they were murdered by Death Eaters, of course.

"This is your fault! You're not on our side at all! If you were, you would have warned us, and they would still be alive right now!"

The only reason that Black wasn't hexing Severus was because Lupin was restraining him. Similarly, McGonagall had an iron grip on Alastory Moody's wand arm. The Auror looked like he was about to follow through on his near-constant threats to ship Severus to Azkaban on the spot. Dumbledore hadn't arrived yet.

"I didn't even know that he was targeting the Prewetts," Severus argued through grit teeth, trying not to yell.

"You knew, you're just blood-purist scum like the rest of them, you think they're blood traitors and you wanted them to die!"

"The Dark Lord doesn't tell everybody everything; he doesn't put all his eggs in one basket. That's just the way it works."

"You-"

"I didn't know!"

"Enough."

You could have heard a pin drop: Dumbledore's entrance had effectively put an end to the argument. The entire room turned towards their leader and waited for him to speak. Dumbledore met Severus's eyes briefly, and Severus felt something press against his mind, like water trying to seep through a dam. He let it, surprising himself with how badly he wanted Dumbledore to know that he was telling the truth.

The Headmaster looked away after a moment. He spoke quietly, but there was no doubt that everyone heard his solemn words. "You all have a right to mourn and to be angry about what happened tonight. The Prewett brothers died fighting for what they believed in, but that does not negate the fact that they were well-loved and will be missed very much.

"That being said, this tragedy does not give you permission to abuse Severus. Yes, if he had known beforehand and been able to warn us, Gideon and Fabian might have survived. However, we will never know that for sure, and we cannot change what is already past.

"As much as we may wish it, Lord Voldemort"—Severus wasn't the only one who winced—"is not a straightforward opponent. I am not surprised that Severus did not know about the attack. Voldemort would never trust every one of his followers with all of his plans and secrets, for it would eliminate the question of who knows what, and he thrives on causing fear and suspicion.

"Severus is not to blame here. If you wish to point fingers, point them at Lord Voldemort."