"Oh, here's one: Wukong, Adel, and Glynda."

Ozpin pinched his brow at the newest set of names Qrow had presented. At first, Branwen's game seemed harmless enough. But now it was becoming borderline disturbing.

"Must you use my students as choices?"

"Hey man, you said you were bored," Qrow said, spinning in his chair, "We've gone through almost everyone else we know."

The Headmaster thought carefully about this one. No matter which choices he made, they would all be in bad taste. Hell, this whole game was in bad taste now that he pondered it. He could feel a bead of sweat dripping down his temple.

"Alright… Kill Glynda, marry Wukong, and fornicate with Adel-

"Shit man!" Qrow burst into laughter, slapping his knee, "You'd rather be a pedophile and sleep with one of your own students than with Glynda?! That's messed up!"

"I refuse to go on record saying that I wish to kill one of my students," Ozpin said, mug in hand.

"And how is that any different than saying you want to sleep with one of 'em?"

"This is a form of entrapment, you know."

"And that's why it's funny," Qrow popped a potato chip into his mouth, his eyes trailing over to the camera feed, "Oh, would you look at that. That Lieutenant guy is mashing up a banana for Taurus. Cute."

"His loyalty is truly astounding," Ozpin noted, checking the donation rate on his laptop, "The entire altercation involving him, Miss Belladonna and your niece brought us our largest view count to date."

"Still feel bad for Yang, though," Qrow said, watching as his elder niece entered her sister's room for a visit, "Ruby even sent me that picture of her and Blake lip-locked. Gotta wonder how many others have that pic by now."

"Indeed," Ozpin nodded, "I was surprised to receive it myself."

"…Say what now?"

"I have it as well. For documentation purposes of this experience, that is. Nothing more."

"Yeah, that better be all- Oh. My. God."

The Headmaster hastily wheeled over to the monitor as Qrow began to snicker uncontrollably. "What? What is happening?"

Qrow pointed to the cam feed focused on the front lawn, where two figures were running to the house. "You ain't gonna believe this."

Stumbling down the rocky driveway, Roman and Cinder placed their backs flat against the front door. They caught their breath, hoping the sweat from running may have loosened the rubber cement between Roman's hand and Cinder's buttocks.

"Any looser?" Cinder asked.

"Um," Torchwick tugged once, "Nope. I think it's even stronger now."

"Dammit!" Cinder cursed, opening the front door slightly. She peeked in with one eye, looking to see if there was anyone in the lounge. "Quick, while no one's around. Make a run for the steps. Don't fall behind."

"Kinda hard to, when I'm stuck to yours."

On the count of three, they slipped through the doors. Cinder walked briskly forward, nearly dragging Roman along with her if not for him being heavier than her. He almost fell flat on his face when she ascended the staircase, stubbing his toes on every step.

"Will you please walk?!" Cinder hissed, glaring back at him.

"Then go slower!"

As they reached the top of the staircase, they heard the voice of someone coming down the hallway up ahead. The two of them stood frozen trying to think of a plan. Seeing a window curtain hanging on the other side of the staircase, Cinder shoved Roman into it and wrapped it around him as Jaune walked by.

"Oh, hey Cinder," he greeted with a small wave, curious as to why she was standing alone on the staircase, "How's it, uh, going?"

"Fine," Cinder said impatiently, standing directly in front of the curtain. She stepped on Roman's foot with her heel as he muffled for air.

"Did that curtain just wince?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Cinder smiled, digging her heel even deeper into the crook as she thought of a way to distract Arc, "But I think I hear Nikos calling for you."

"Really? I don't hear anything-

"Oh no, she is. I think it's coming from the bathroom. She may have hurt herself getting out of the shower."

Blushing, Jaune gave her a puzzled look. It seemed like she was hiding something, but it was probably best for his health that he didn't try and pry it out of her. Plus, Pyrrha might be hurt or something. "If you say so…"

Waiting until the sound of his footsteps were faint, Cinder pulled Torchwick out of the curtain. She ignored his gasping for air as she nearly sprinted to the living quarters.

"I told you to slow down!" Roman said through his teeth, trying his best not to scream at her, "And go to my room! We'll fix it there!"

Soon enough, they reached their destination. Roman noticed that Nora had posted a sign on their door reading 'Team RENN'. Stupid Beacon students and their acronyms.

Entering, they came face to face with Neo, still sitting on her bed. Upon seeing how the two were stuck together, her phone slowly slipped out of her hand as a big grin formed on her lips.

"Now Buttercup," Roman pointed a finger at her with his free hand, "This does not leave the room. Do you understand? I won't complain about you and your stupid game as long as you tell no one about this in any way you possibly can. No pictures, no written messages. Got it?"

Neo gave him a thumbs up while her head was buried in her pillow, muffling her laughter.

"Good. Now once you got the giggles out of your system, we're gonna need your help. Go down to the kitchen and get some warm water, soap, a couple rags, and a bucket. You know what, get a steak knife too. Be inconspicuous about it. Then get back up here immediately."

Wiping her eyes, Neo nodded. Once the little woman left the room, Roman and Cinder went over to a bed. Fall glared down at the crime boss when he sat down and reached for a can of soda on his desk. "What? You can sit down. It'll warm your cold-ass even more."

SLAP!*

"Yup… Walked right into that one."

They remained in silence as Neo returned shortly with all the needed tools. Still smirking, she laid them on the bed for Roman to inspect. Satisfied, the man stood and patted Neo on the head.

"Good, good. This'll work. Alright, get on the bed Cinder."

"I can't believe this," Fall lowered her head in shame, crawling on the mattress and resting on her hands and knees, "Make it quick. This is already humiliating enough as it is."

"You're one to talk," Roman replied, pouring nearly an entire bottle of dish soap over his hand. Waiting for the cleaner to slip in between the cracks, he pulled Cinder back a bit as he poured water on them. The woman flinched as the warm liquid touched her skin and dripped down her legs without warning.

"Can you at least tell me what you're doing before you do it?!"

"Where's the fun in that?" Yanking up with his hand, Roman noticed that his grip was becoming a bit looser. It was enough for him to slip something in between them. "Okay Neo: Knife time."

Cinder's eyes widened at the word knife. "What the hell are you doing with that?!"

"Why wait for this to dissolve completely when we can just cut it away? You ready Neo?"

The short woman shook her head enthusiastically as she approached Cinder's behind with the knife. However, no one had noticed that the door was still open as Neo positioned the blade in between the two...

Now, Emerald had become accustomed to how bizarre this house could be. A food fight during the first dinner and a crazy as shit Faunus were testament to that.

But this... This was on a whole new level of fucked up.

Seeing your boss, the one who picked you off the streets, sitting doggy-style on a bed with the hand of a lesser subordinate glued to her ass all while a little mute woman held a knife between them was more than surreal.

Hell, she had to make sure she hadn't somehow inflicted one of her own illusions on herself by pinching her arm.

Nope.

This was actually happening in front of her.

She opened her mouth to say something, anything. But there were no words for this. None at all.

"Emerald!" Cinder exclaimed as she turned away, "There's an explanation for all of-

She slammed the door behind her and walked down the hall, slowly and stiffly, trying to erase the image from her memory.

If there was a God, then he was sure as hell turning in his grave.

Thankfully, Neo was quite precise with her cutting skills. In a matter of minutes she had freed Roman and Cinder from their adhesive bonds. The second she had been freed, Cinder rushed out of the room after Emerald to offer her explanation, but not before threatening to skin Roman alive if he ever touched her again.

Just as quickly as things had gone awry, things had returned to normal. Roman sat on back to back with Neo on the bed as he picked at the rubber cement still stuck to his palm. "You know Buttercup, I should take your advice more often. Glue always give me trouble in the end. I'd say this is almost as bad as the time I stuck my hands together with the stuff. You remember that, right?"

Neo bumped the back of her head on his neck to say yes. He could tell by the way she wiggled her back that she wanted his attention. Roman was pretty sure he knew what she wanted.

"…Hey, if you're not too busy with that phone I wouldn't mind my 'Just Desserts' right about now. I know we missed dinner, but we can just skip straight to the good part if you catch my drift."

Turning around and leaning over her, he peered over Neo's shoulder to snag her phone away. To his surprise, she wasn't on her device. No, there was a little black book in her hands.

"Where'd you get that from?" Torchwick gestured at the book, to which Neo pointed to the floor. "Down there, eh? Let me see that."

Plucking it from Neo's fingers, Roman flipped through the pages and took in the numerous doodles of Little Red's dog and Schnee being eviscerated. His eyes lit up in devious glee when he read the inside cover.

"Property of Cinder Fall… Oh, this day just keeps getting better and better."