Everyone Loves Beans

Based on a side quest given by Takka in FFXV.

AN: Bean puns.

Entering Takka's Pit Stop, the owner himself waved at them, garnering their attention. "Got a job for y'all, if you've got time."

Noctis walked up to the counter, more than happy to help the man since he had been feeding them the past few days. "Sure. What's up?"

"Somethin' nasty's holdin' up my supplier, so now I'm runnin' low on beans."

He felt his whole body froze and instantly regretted coming up to the man. He couldn't help but whine a bit. "Beeeans?"

Takka raised an eyebrow. "Don't like 'em?"

"Not so much." Noctis admitted, feeling the stares of his royal adviser and his Glaive. Ignis had been trying to feed him vegetables since he was a kid, while Lightning had always disapproved of him being a picky eater.

"That's 'cause you ain't never had 'em cooked right." Takka reasoned, confident that he'd been eating beans the wrong way his entire life. "I simmer 'em long an' slow." From that innuendo, Prompto waggled his eyebrows, which resulted him being smacked by Gladio.

The cook rubbed the back of his neck. "Leastways, when I have 'em. I'd be real grateful if y'all would help."

Noctis sighed and accepted his request. Takka noticed his reluctance and contemplated. "Hmmm. You say ya hate beans, son, but I reckon a batch of mine'll change your mind."

Soon, the Prince and his retinue travelled to the location Takka provided. In middle of the wild fields, they spotted an abandoned truck with a gang of Havocfangs lurking around it.

"Perhaps these are the bean bandits?" Ignis commented, while Prompto readied his pistols. "Time to save the legumes!"

It took them up to no time and effort at all to secure the stranded legumes. After the fight, Gladio decided it was the right time to make the pun. "Mission accomplished: the beans have bean saved."

Prompto stared at him, then snickered and joined in. "It wasn't too bad dealing with the bean-dits."

While the two were giving each other a fist bump, Noctis gave an exasperated sigh. "Enough about the beans. Seriously."

Returning to the diner, they were greeted with a happy Takka. "Good news: all my deliveries finally came in. Y'all have my thanks."

"Of course." Ignis replied and nonchalantly added. "We would have completed the mission by any beans necessary."

There was a muffled laugh behind him and Noctis nearly groaned as Ignis decided to join in on the puns as well. No doubt the sound came from Prompto and Gladio while Lightning gave a small smile, hidden underneath her fist. Takka didn't notice, but Noctis did.

"That's great." The cook replied, then turned to the Prince. "Beans are healthy and nutritious. What's not to like?"

"I guess I could eat 'em if I had to."

"You wanna hear a tip from an ol' pro? Forget they're beans… Pretend they're little meatballs!"

He resisted the urge to grimace. "'Little meatballs'... I'll give it a try."

That evening, as promised, Takka made them dinner with beans as the main ingredient. The Prince was hesitant at first but he survived dinner and admitted that they weren't that bad.

Although he didn't show it, Ignis was ecstatic that Noct was finally giving the vegetable a try. Walking back to the caravan just across from the diner, Ignis pondered. "I would love to have my hands on that recipe. Perhaps there is still hope for other vegetables if Noct can consume beans."

Lightning spoke up for the first time since the mission. "I'm sure… Takka won't mind spilling the beans."

Prompto snorted loudly and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "That's my girl!" He gave her a high five, in which she returned, pleased with herself.

Noctis stopped walking and simply gave her a flat stare. "I really hate you guys."

AN: Not my finest drabble, but I really really wanted to add the bean puns (bwahahaha). When I played this side quest, I found the dialogue hilarious. Subtle Lightis.