Thankies to other readers for reviewing. Okay, just to let you know, I am black (and proud of it; and it's in my profile) and I really wanted to do this idea for a while now. So, don't think me racist or something. I just forgot to write a Black History Month idea for the previous life in Radiant Garden. And for those who can guess the movie where a particular song came from, I'll give ya a burger or two (just let me know what you want on it)
-miano53
History Months and Journalistic Slanders
That Thursday (Feb. 1) at Radiant Garden High School…
Lea, while pushing Ven in his wheelchair, looked around and saw many of the black student of Radiant Garden and the exchange students from the U.S. were walking around wearing…afro-centric attires. "Er, what's going on?" Lea asked Ven.
"I don't know…Oh crud," Ven said.
"What?" Lea asked.
"Prof. Sazh will be so mad at us for forgetting," Ven said.
"What?" Lea asked again.
"It's Black History Month and we didn't get him anything…" Ven replied.
In Prof. Sazh's math class…
Isa, Zack, Garnet and Vivi saw that some of the "pro-black" students were wearing afro-centric garb and some even put up the "Fist of Solidarity". The four looked at Prof. Sazh and saw that he only had a small pin in the shape of the continent of Africa on his jacket. He looked around and saw that the students dressed in African garb were putting up fists of solidarity and avoided the European, Radiant Garden and other "non-black" students.
"Okay, let's not go back to the Jim Crow era, people! Go back to your assigned seats!" Prof. Sazh told everyone.
"Prof. Sazh," one of the students said.
"Yeah?" Prof. Sazh replied.
"Will we receive any 'favors'," she asked, wondering if he was going to give any of the students with African ethnicity will get extra credit.
"No and no!" Prof. Sazh yelled.
"Why not? We built this country from the ground up! Ansem the Wise's ancestors owned slaves!" one of the other students yelled.
"No, Radiant Garden never had slaves and no, African slaves didn't built the country 'cause Radiant Garden never had slavery," Prof. Sazh said, giving a mini-lecture.
"Sellout!" a student yelled.
Prof. Sazh scoffed and Zack got up and yelled, "Prof. Sazh isn't a sellout!"
"Can it, white boy!" one of the other "pro-black" students yelled.
"Prof. Sazh isn't a sellout! He's providing equal opportunity for everybody. If you give favors to other students base on ethnicity, that's being racist," Garnet.
"Quiet! You don't know anything! We gave this world our best years!" one of the female "pro-black" students yelled.
"Everyone, quiet! Drop the subject! No one is getting extra credit!" Prof. Sazh yelled.
"Aw…" everyone said and Prof. Sazh was finally able to start his class.
Later in Prof. Sazh's room…
Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz entered the room to see the KS group hanging out. Ven was still wearing the badge from a week ago and Yazoo said, "Are you alright?"
"Yep. I didn't get a concussion or anything so I'm good," Ven said, smiling.
"Well, I heard that the jocks aim to get back at you guys," Kadaj said, sitting down.
"Who cares? They'll just get beaten up by the students who watched too many episodes of 'Roots'," Isa said.
"Why?" Vivi asked.
"Today's the first day of Black History Month and most of the 'Afro-centric' students think that Radiant Garden had slaves," Prof. Sazh explained.
"Oh…Aw crap!" Zidane yelled.
"What?" Prof. Sazh asked.
"We didn't get you anything," Demyx said, saddened.
"Don't worry. That's not what this month's about. We're supposed to remember what many black pioneers did and other significant events," Prof. Sazh explained.
"Oh," the group said.
"For example, you see that fire extinguisher?" Prof. Sazh said.
"Yeah," Zack said for everyone.
"That was invented by an African-American man named Thomas J. Martin in 1872," Prof. Sazh said, giving another mini-lecture.
"Oh," everyone said.
"So, that's the main purpose of the month, but others don't see it that way," Prof. Sazh said, nodding towards the door where several of the Afro-centric students began playing music from their I-Phones. What made the situation a bit funny, but odd and a bit stereotypical was that the students were playing the song "I'm black y'all".
"I'm black y'all and I'm black y'all! And I'm blacker than black! And I'm black y'all!" the students rapped with the music, putting up the Fist of Solidarity.
Prof. Sazh sighed and got up from his desk. "Go home!" he yelled.
"Sellout!" one of the other students yelled back.
"Okay, don't say anything when you receive a detention tomorrow, Charley, Tamika, and Leon! Yes, I know it's you! You're in my second hour class!" Prof. Sazh yelled.
"Aw man…" the group of three said and left the school.
Prof. Sazh sat back at his desk and Zack stood up. "What are you doing?" Prof. Sazh asked.
"Well, since its Black History Month, we decided to do something for you," Zack said.
"Oh no," was all Prof. Sazh said, thinking of the worse.
"Ven, do you still have the gloomy bear that I gave you on Christmas?" Lea asked.
"Yeah, it's in my locker," Ven replied.
Lea immediately left and Zack asked, "Demyx, Firion, you guys got that song ready?"
"Um, yeah, but I don't think he'll like it," Demyx said, nodding towards Prof. Sazh.
"We don't have anything else," Zack told them.
"Ooh! I got an idea!" Vivi said.
"It's gonna be stupid," Kadaj mumbled.
"Quiet! Vivi, let's hear it," Garnet said.
"Oh, we can…" Vivi was about to say when Lea arrived with the Gloomy Bear puppet.
"Got it!" Lea exclaimed, raising the puppet.
"Oh…" Vivi said sadly.
"Oh, Vivi, let's hear your idea," Zack said.
"We can give Prof. Sazh collages on what would happen if the world didn't have any inventions from Afro-Americans," Vivi said happily.
"That's a good idea. I thought you were going to say something like not using anything from them," Zidane said, sighing in relief.
"Okay, I like it. Now, what's with the gloomy bear puppet," Prof. Sazh said.
Demyx pulled out his guitar, played it and Firion coughed. Ven was given the puppet and Firion began singing. Garnet pulled out her camera and began recording the event.
"Look out world; I'm coming right for you. Lock your doors and close your windows," Firion began singing.
That made Prof. Sazh snicker and Firion continued with Ven using the puppet to mock his singing. "Don't look now. I'm right behind you. I…am…the Teddy Bear that eats you. I…am…the Teddy Bear that eats you. Let me fly….Fly away….Away from here…So I don't kill…" Firion continued, the bear still "singing".
Everyone stifled their laughter as the bear continued "singing". "Look out world. I'm coming right for you. Lock your doors and close your windows. "Don't look now. I'm right behind you. I…am…the Teddy Bear that eats you. I…am…the Teddy Bear that eats you. Let me fly…Fly away…Away from here…So I don't kill…" the bear continued.
Once Firion and Demyx were done, everyone began roaring with laughter. "What was that?" Kadaj screamed, laughing.
"That's all we could come up with," Demyx said.
"Were you two high when you came up with that one?" Lea asked, on the floor from laughing.
"Um, no…" Firion said, feeling a bit embarrassed.
"Ha, well that was funny. The perfect pick me up for after what happened today," Prof. Sazh said, still laughing.
The next day…
Garnet, who was in the Journalism classroom, began typing something on the computer. Yazoo immediately came in the classroom with Kadaj and Loz. "Hiya, Garnet," Kadaj said.
"Hello. What are you all doing in here?" Garnet asked.
"They're here to help us in the exciting world of journalism," Yazoo said happily.
"Oh! Then go out and sell these papers please," Garnet said, handing Loz some papers.
Loz took them and quickly left with the collection box.
Sadly, a few minutes later, Garnet, Kadaj and Yazoo saw Loz enter the room with all the papers Garnet gave him earlier. "Extra! Extra! Kids pelt Loz with 'Can't Sell' school papers! Not a one, guys," Loz said.
Kadaj took a paper and read a article out loud. "'Vivi makes shortcake'? I wouldn't even give our dog this bunk!" Kadaj said angrily.
"Where's the scandals? That's what sells newspapers!" Kadaj yelled.
"Yeah, 'cause scandals are baked fresh daily," Loz said, eating a paper.
The whole room went quiet and Kadaj said (breaking the fourth wall), "Ignore him. Just stick to the script."
"I'll be the first to admit that our papers these past few days have been…lacking," Garnet said.
"But that's all about to change! Our sources tell us that the knitting club is about to attempt the world's largest t-shirt!" Yazoo added.
Kadaj frowned and said in sarcasm, "Wow, that's the scoop of a lifetime. You two better hoof it on over there, before their arteries harden." He then escorted the two out of the rom and shut the door.
When Loz heard the word "arteries", he yelled, "Touch the arteries! Touch the arteries!"
He then charged towards the door and slammed headfirst into it. Kadaj took a picture of the back of his head and said, "I'm gonna turn this dump into a world class munny machine!"
A bit later…
Kadaj set the copier to the fastest speed and had the entire Journalism classroom in a mess of paper. He then changed the name of the paper from Radiant Garden High School Free Press to the Radiant Garden High Tattler. Loz began picking up the papers and noticed that he was on the front cover.
"Oh, look! It's me! It says, 'Miniature Aliens have colonized Loz's head and began mining mako from his skull'. This Tatl and Tael sure is a smart guy," Loz said.
"It's 'Tatl Tael'. Yep, the best tabloid reporter there is," Kadaj yelled, cutting some words out of a dictionary.
"Let's see what we got here. 'Monkey-Boy created'…I got tomorrow's headline! 'Monkey-Boy created in Science Class! I like it!" Kadaj said.
Noticing that Loz wasn't out selling papers, he pushed Loz out of the room and said, "You still here? Get out there and make me some cash, paper boy!"
Loz left, leaving Kadaj to come up with more slanderous material.
On the second floor, Vivi had trouble getting the water fountain to work. Thankfully Yuna was nearby and she asked, "Do you need help?"
"Yeah. My fickle fingers just aren't forceful enough," Vivi said, saddened.
Yuna pressed the button on the water fountain and a spray of water hit Vivi, knocking him to the floor. On the floor, Vivi said, "Do you hear them, Yuna? It's the angels in heaven. They're singing…"
"Extra! Extra! Larxene kicked off cheerleading squad!" Loz yelled.
"What? Let me see that," Yuna said, taking a paper.
Vivi and she read the paper and it said, "Head cheerleader, Larxene Pelletier, was let go by Coach Jihl Nabaat for refusing to shave her legs."
"200 munny, please," Loz said.
Yuna then saw something shocking in the paper. "Hey! 'Tidus Zanar's girlfriend, Yuna, is a part of a pregnancy pact. It is said that she and 30 other girls are planning to have a child before the end of the year," she said in anger.
"Wow, to think you know someone," Vivi mumbled.
Yuna began screaming and ran into the girls' bathroom, crying the whole time. "Yuna! Yuna! Wait!" Vivi yelled.
He creaked the door open a bit and said, "Yuna?"
Yuna, mad as heck, screamed, "DON'T LOOK AT ME!"
That knocked Vivi back and down a few stairs, where he landed on a landing. "Ow. Yuna, the angels are singing again and I see a light," Vivi yelled.
In Prof. Edea Krammer's English class, Ven saw Loz enter the room. "Extra! Extra! Shuyin Zanar has a world collection of spandex bicycle shorts!" he yelled.
"What?" Prof. Edea said, confused.
The students paid to have the papers and Loz made about 3,000 munny. Ven paid for the paper and looked through the paper. He saw something that angered him to the point of no return. Prof. Edea saw it and read it aloud.
"Ventus Pellegrino was caught dressed in drags yesterday," Prof. Edea read. The insult to injury was that the "reporter" added a photoshoped picture of Ven in a blue stripper dress and wearing makeup and a blonde wig.
"I'm gonna kill this Tatl Tael," Ven said, becoming Vanitas (and scaring his classmates).
In Prof. Sazh's class, Lea saw Loz enter the room. "Extra! Extra! Braig Archer checked his nonexistent abs and found the lost city of Atlantis earlier today!" he yelled.
"What is this?" Prof. Sazh asked, confused.
The students paid for the paper and Lea saw something that shocked him (and scared him due to the amount of "Afro-centric" students in the room). Lea read the paper aloud and said, "Tatl Tael says, 'Prof. Sazh plans on bulldozing Prof. Xehanort's house to build a rest home for his grandmother'."
What made it worse was that "Tatl Tael" had a picture of Sazh standing next to a…ape. "The fudge?" all the black students screamed.
Prof. Sazh looked at the picture and said nothing in anger. "Uh oh…" Lea said.
"Lea, I hope you got a plan in mind to get this 'Tatl Tael'," Prof. Sazh said.
"He could be him! Kill him!" the students in African garb yelled.
"Wait! Lea's not in the Journalism club!" Tidus yelled.
"Oh! To the Journalism department!" everyone yelled and headed out of the room in vengeance.
Back on the second floor…
Firion sat on one of the benches and read an article about Ven. "Wow, Ven…looks ugly as a girl," he mumbled.
He then saw Prof. Zexion walking down the hall. "Hey Prof. Zexion. Did you see this?" he said, showing the picture of the dressed in drags Ven.
"Ew. I didn't know Ven did that," Prof. Zexion said.
The two then saw a fuming Prof. Xehanort. "Uh oh," Prof. Zexion said.
Prof. Xehanort was about to head for the first floor when he saw Prof. Sazh and his class going towards the first floor as well.
The two were followed by an angry Ven (who came off the elevator), Braig (who also took the elevator), the jocks, Prof. Edea's class, Shuyin and the entire KS group (since they saw the papers).
"Oh no. Whoever's doing this is about to start a war," Prof. Zexion said and he and Firion followed the angry mob.
Holding up the paper, Prof. Xehanort yelled at Prof. Sazh, saying, "Some pal you are! You played me for a pansy! You told that Tatl Tael that you want to destroy my house to build a rest home for that ape grandmother of yours!"
That angered Prof. Sazh to the point where he yelled, "Don't you be talkin' about my grandma like that!"
He then punched Prof. Xehanort in the face. "Kill 'em! Kill 'em! Shank him! Kill 'em!" his students, minus Tidus and Lea, screamed.
The two began fighting, causing an extremely loud ruckus and making everyone come out of their classrooms on the second floor.
Just before the fight could go any further, they saw Larxene grab Vivi by the ear. "Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk!" Vivi screamed.
He then pointed to the girls' bathroom and the fight between the teachers came to a halt. Larxene kicked down the door and yelled, "I know it was you that went to that Tatl Tael guy and gave him that bogus story about my legs, you little slut!"
That angered Yuna to something that Tidus never seen before. "Witch, what you call me?" Yuna screamed (getting censored).
Yuna then drop kicked Larxene down the stairs. Everyone stopped and became silent. "Aah!" Larxene screamed, running up the stairs with a geology book in her hands.
She threw it at Yuna's head and it hit with a "bonk". "Nice try!" Yuna said, still angry.
What shocked everyone was that Yuna grabbed Larxene's hair and began punching her in the face. "You little witch!" Larxene yelled, grabbing Yuna's hair and punching her.
The two exchanged punches and kicked and some of their hair was torn out. "Kill her! Kill her!" Prof. Sazh's class, now including Lea and Tidus, screamed.
"Shank the little witch! Kill her!" Shuyin yelled.
"Knock her butt into next week, Yuna!" Vivi yelled.
"Well, it says here that your butt was knocked two Thursdays from now by the Girls' Swim Team," Firion said, silencing the mob and stopping Yuna and Larxene from killing each other.
Vivi blushed and, in anger, yelled, "LIES! BIG, FLITHY EARTH BOY LIES!"
That really silence the mob, with everyone staring at Vivi in shock. "Okay…" Zack mumbled.
"Well, it's time to introduce this Tatl Tael to my fists of punctuality!" Ven/Vanitas screamed.
"Hey, get in line, Ven! If anyone's having the last laugh, we're having it first!" Braig yelled, pointing to the jocks who were shamed.
"Well, you guys can count me out," Firion said. He then read an article about him that said , "Firion El was found by the government to be a terrorist that loves to blow up cars when you least expect it."
"What?" he screamed. Tearing up the paper, Firion said, "Count me in…"
The mob then headed for the Journalism classroom…
Back on the first floor…
Garnet and Yazoo reentered the classroom where they saw a happy Kadaj and Loz. "Oh, what's going on?" Garnet asked.
"Look at all the munny we raked in," Kadaj said.
Yazoo gasped and said, "Thank you. Thank you! The student fund will be greatly enriched by this week's turnover."
He then took the box of munny and Kadaj said, "Student fund?"
"Yes, the newspaper is a nonprofit organization. All proceeds go to the school," Garnet said.
"Like heck they are! The munny's mine!" Kadaj screamed, snatching the munny box from Yazoo.
Within moments, the door was broken down and Prof. Sazh yelled, "Who the heck's this Tatl Tael guy?"
Garnet, Yazoo, Kadaj, Loz and any other Journalism students in the room were dragged out. "You better spill the beans, Ms. Editor, or you're dead meat!" Braig yelled, holding a bat.
"We have no idea what you're talking about!" Garnet yelled in fear.
"Who wrote this stuff?" Prof. Xehanort yelled, showing Yazoo and Garnet the paper.
"'Pregnancy Pacts'? 'Hairy legs'? 'Miniature Aliens and Terrorists in the School'? Who indeed is Tatl Tael?" Yazoo said.
The mob looked at Kadaj and Yazoo said, "Kadaj? Care to explain?"
"Uh, couldn't tell ya. Sounds like a jerk," Kadaj said, accidentally dropping the munny box.
"Er, you dropped your loot, Tatl and Tael," Loz said, point at the munny.
"It's 'Tatl Tael'! GET IT RIGHT!" Kadaj screamed.
He then realized that he revealed his journalist identity. "Oops," Kadaj said.
He was then grabbed by the mob and led to God-knows-where…
At the end of the day…
Prof. Zexion saw the paper again and it said, "Tatl Tael was a false journalist. He was none other than Kadaj Jenova, the jerk we all know and hate. He is now the founder and only member of the newly formed Knitting Club. As his punishment for slander by Yen Sid, he is forced to knit the world's largest t-shirt."
Due to what happened earlier, Kadaj was also given a month's worth of detention after school.
Well, that's for now. Read and review. Oh and the song that Firion sung was by Johnny Yong Bosch and Eyeshine; it was called the Teddy Bear that Eats You.