Chapter 9: Daydreaming
Kat closed the door behind her, looked down at her phone and scrolled through Spotify to find her workout playlist. She found the one she was looking for and hit shuffle. She could hear the faint sound of "Flower" by Moby playing through her earbuds. She started humming along, but before she could pop them in, she heard something from down the hall. Nils must have left his door open again. She shook her head; he would have to learn to close doors now that the Selected were here. She looked down at her watch and, deciding she had a few extra minutes, took a detour to check in on her older brother.
Nils's door was indeed open, and when she could see him pacing across the floor and talking to himself.
"They're here. They're here. They're here. They're here. They're–"
Kat sighed; she should have known. She knocked lightly on his door frame and stuck her head in.
Nils looked up, eyes falling on his sister. "Kat! They're here. They're here Kat, and I can't do this. I can't do this. They're here."
"Nils," Kat walked over to her pacing brother and put her hand on his shoulder, forcing him to stop, "Nils, calm down. Come sit down." She led him over to his bed and sat down, pulling him with her.
"I just– They're here now. It's happening, and I'm not ready," Nils sighed, putting his head in his hands.
"What happened? I know you were never exactly happy with this, but I thought you had come to terms with it…?"
"It's just all too much. The Selection, relations with Russia, the council, it's all just too much. I was never supposed to do this. Sigrid was supposed to do everything. I'm not supposed to be King. I can't be King. Who am I kidding? I can't do this, not without Sigrid or Mom or Dad. I'm alone."
"Nils, you aren't alone. You have me, and you have Gunnar, and you have Ian. We are all here, and we want to help. You just need to let us. Here, I was about to go practice for a while, do you want to come? Maybe a little one on one?"
Nils stood up abruptly, not looking at Kat. "You think, you can help? You think any of you can help? What can you do, Katarina? Do you know how to run a country? Do you know how to read a peace treaty or write a trade agreement? Do you know how to talk to foreign diplomats? Do you know how to command militaries and enforce laws? Do you know how to run a privy council meeting? Do you? Do any of you?"
Kat was silent, helpless. He was right. What did she know about running a country?
"Right," Nils whispered. He gave her a cold stare before turning away to walk out the door.
"Nils, I—"
He reeled on her. "What, Kat? You what? You suddenly remembered you know how to run a country?"
"No, but—"
"I didn't think so." He walked out of the room, not giving her a second glance.
Kat closed her eyes and fell back on the bed. She brought her hand up to her mouth and bit her lip, holding back tears. What had she expected? It wasn't like she actually knew what her brother was going through. She had no idea what it was like. But that didn't mean she didn't care. All she wanted to do was help. She just wanted him to talk to her. She wanted things to be how they used to be. She missed the way they used to talk. He used to tell her things. She wanted that back. She wanted her brother back. Wasn't it enough that she lost her parents and sister? Did she have to lose her brother as well?
She lay on the bed for a few more moments before sitting up, taking a deep breath, and brushing away the tears. She was done trying. She had been trying every day since the plane crash. She was there. She tried. She had done her part. If he wanted to bottle up his feelings and be miserable, let him.
...o0o...
Gunnar closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and tried to focus on the paper he was reading. Another loud thunk came from below his window. He took another deep breath. This had been going on for nearly an hour. He turned the page, but before he could find his place, there was another thunk. He put down the cup of tea he had been holding and walked over to his window to see what on earth was going on.
He looked out the window to find Kat, a few stories down, kicking balls against the wall. He was going to kill her. She had an entire soccer field to herself; why did she have to practice against the wall? He turned away from the window and stormed out of his room and down the hall, almost running down a few maids in the process. He tried to calm down, but barely scratched the surface.
He stormed across the grounds, rage written across his face. He was going to murder her. She knew this was the time he took out of every day to read and get a bit of peace and quiet. She knew he had enough trouble concentrating without her making a racket below his window.
"Katarina Schreave, what on earth–" Gunnar stopped. Kat's cheeks were glistening with tears. Her fists were balled so tightly her knuckles were white. She was kicking the ball harder and with more passion than he had seen in a long time. "Kat…"
"Go away Gunnar," Kat said, not looking at him.
"Kat, what's going on?"
"I said go away."
"Kat."
"I SAID GO AWAY!" Kat turned to face him, tears streaming down her face, "Just leave me alone. I want to be alone." She fell to the ground, her face falling into her hands. Her small body was now jerking with her sobs.
"Oh Kitty," Gunnar sunk to the ground next to her, pulling his younger sister into his arms. "What happened? What's going on?"
"I don't want to talk about it," Kat said through her tears, turning her face into his chest.
"Kitty," Gunnar said, brushing his fingers through her hair, "tell me what happened."
They sat there in silence for a few minutes before she began speaking.
"It's Nils. He won't talk to me. And he screamed at me earlier today. For trying to help. He said I don't know anything, that I couldn't possibly know what he's going through. I know he's right, but that doesn't mean I can't help or that I don't care. He keeps saying he is so alone, but we are right here. I just want to help him. I want to help him, Gunnar. I just want to help. And he yelled at me. For wanting to help. What if we're losing him too, Gunnar? First Mama–"
"Kitty, stop. You aren't losing Nils."
"But–"
"You aren't. I promise. He loves you. So much. Don't ever forget that. And he knows you want to help, but he's right. We don't know what it's like. Very few people could. That doesn't mean we can't help him, but we can't pretend we know what he is going through. He just needs space. He needs time to grieve. No one is giving him time to grieve. Give him some time and I'm sure he will come around. He's going to need his sister once all these pining girls get to him."
Kat laughed, brushing away the last of her tears. She stood up and stretched her hand down to Gunnar. "Come practice with me."
"Kat…" Gunnar hadn't played with his sister in years. Usually it was Ian who played with her, or even some of the guards when they were off duty.
"Come on, I need someone to practice with, and Ian isn't here. Besides, I have to go address the Selected in an hour, so it won't be that long anyway."
"Fine, but only for a little," Gunnar said, rolling his eyes.
...o0o...
Lugia stopped outside the Yellow Room and stood in front of one of the many tall mirrors that lined the long hall. She looked at herself, immaculate hair and makeup done by her lovely maids and a beautiful dusty pink dress. She had never felt so beautiful! Her fingers ran along her arms, goosebumps rising as her thoughts drifted, for the millionth time since she had arrived at the palace the day before, to how much her life had changed since a few weeks ago when she entered the Selection. Now here she was, standing in the Royal Palace of Illéa. She still couldn't believe it.
Lugia was pulled from her thoughts by the soft clicking of a door closing. She looked up to see another girl walking down the hall towards the women's room. Lugia wracked her brain for the girl's name. She knew she had heard it before, she just couldn't put her finger on what it was. Maybe something with a "K"? Before she could figure it out the girl smiled and walked over to her.
"Hi, I'm Katherine. Lugia, right?"
Katherine, that's right. "Ya, Lugia."
"Are you going to go in?" Katherine gestured to the open doors of the Yellow Room.
"Oh, ya. I was just looking in the mirror. None of this feels real yet."
"I know what you mean. I can't get used to the fact that we have maids."
"I know, but I kind of like it. It really makes you feel like a princess."
Katherine laughed, "I guess so."
"We should probably go in. I don't know much about Evelyn yet, but the one thing I know is that I don't want to get on her bad side."
"Hear, hear to that!"
The girls walked in, meeting a room full of chattering girls and boys. They were spread out across the airy, sunlit room, the pale yellow accents true to its name. Some sat around tables talking, a few stood awkwardly by the windows, and others congregated along the back wall where there was a long table of food. They all seemed to be avoiding the rows of chairs towards the front of the room. No doubt that would be where they had their first lesson.
Lugia and Katherine started towards the back of the room, hoping to get a glass of water or a bit of food before the lesson started, but before they could, the doors to the Yellow Room shut loudly and the room fell silent. The distinct sound of heels on hardwood floor was the only sound, deafening in the silent room. All the girls turned to see Evelyn Pruitt standing in front of the rows of chairs.
"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. Please take a seat."
All the selected scrambled to find sit down, most choosing a spot next to the one or two fellow Selected they had chosen as their first friends. Katherine and Lugia followed suit, taking seats towards the middle of the second row. Lugia smiled at the Selected on her left, a shorter girl with dark hair. She smiled back and started to say something, but Evelyn cut her off.
"Now that you have all taken your seats, we have a special guest before we begin our lesson today." Evelyn gestured to the two pages standing alert at the doors.
Lugia craned her neck to see them open the two tall doors.
The one on the left brought his staff down and stated clearly, "Her Royal Highness, Princess Katarina of Illéa"
The princess walked through the doors, holding her head high, just as regal as the night before. Lugia stood with the rest of the Selected, seeing Evelyn give a cold glare to the few Selected who took a moment longer to catch on. Luckily, Lugia knew what she was doing.
Princess Katarina walked to the front of the room, smiling politely to Evelyn, who bowed her head in respect. Once she had taken her place next to Evelyn, she turned to the Selected and put out her hand, indicating they could take their seats. She waited a moment to let them get settled before speaking.
"I would like to extend my warmest welcome to each and every one of you. I know I said it last night, but my siblings and I are so looking forward to getting to know all of you in the coming months. We hope you will be comfortable and happy here. Please do not hesitate to come Evelyn or myself if you have any needs or concerns. We want you to feel as at home as possible. After all, one of you will one day call this palace home." Katerina paused for a moment, smiling to herself, "I know today is your first day of lessons, and I do not wish to take up your time, but there are a few things I wanted to make you aware of. Firstly, as some of you may know, there are several events that will take place over the course of the Selection. The first of these events is the Welcome Banquet, which will take place tomorrow night. This will be your first opportunity to meet His Majesty, King Nils."
Lugia noticed Princess Katerina falter there, only for a moment. She supposed it must be strange to refer to her brother as the King.
"Second, I want you all to know that my door, as well as my brothers' are always open. You can find our offices on the first floor of the East Wing. Be respectful of course, but we are happy to help with most things. If you have questions about anything or simply wish to talk, we are there. There are, however, parts of the palace, such as our private chambers, you will not be permitted to enter. I am sure Evelyn will go over all of that with you today. Finally, I wish to remind you that my brother is now the King. Selections are usually held before the Prince or Princess ascends to the throne, so there will be some things about this Selection that are a bit unorthodox. I only wish to remind you that he is human as well and will likely make mistakes along the way. Please do not be too hard on him. With that I will let Evelyn continue with the lesson; I am sure you have a lot to cover today. Thank you for your time."
The princess nodded to the Selected before politely leaving the room. Lugia looked after, letting the fact that the Princess of Illéa had told them they could pop into her office whenever sink in. Her joy didn't last long though. Before her mind could wander too far, Evelyn began speaking again.
"Like the Princess said, we have a lot to cover today, but first I need to address one thing. While the Princess extended a generous offer of open office doors, you are never to take advantage of it. You will visit her and her siblings only when necessary, and always come to me first. If I hear you are bothering any member of the Royal Family, there will be serious consequences. Have I made myself clear?"
Lugia's smile fell from her face, but she quickly nodded along with the rest of the Selected.
"Good. Now, we will begin our tour of the palace in a few minutes. Before we do so, I will give you a quick overview. The wing we are currently in, the West Wing, is where you will spend most of your time. Your rooms are on the second floor, and the Women's Room, Men's Room, and this room are all here on the first floor. There is also access to one of the galleries, the courtyard, and the gardens. Aside from meals, unless accompanied by myself or a member of the Royal Family, you should have few reasons to stray from this wing. The North Wing is where the Entrance Hall, ballrooms, and Dining Hall are located, as well as the North Library. The East Wing is where the Royal Family resides. Their offices are on the first floor, as well as their private library. Their private chambers are located on the second and third floors, as well as their private parlors. You are never to enter either floor without explicit permission from His Majesty. If you are found there without permission, or the King or myself hear you have been there, you will be eliminated immediately. Understood?"
They all nodded.
"Good. The South Wing is reserved for governmental and diplomatic purposes. Privy Council meetings as well as meetings with foreign ambassadors and royals are held there. Foreign visitors are also housed in the South Wing. You should rarely need to visit the South Wing. Now, you are free to visit the gardens and grounds as you please, so long as you are respectful at all times. Please mind the timing of your visits. If the Princess is practicing on the soccer fields, you would do well to use them another time. Likewise with the gardens.
"Now that all that has been explained, we will begin our tour. Please follow me."
Hello all! I know it's been a hot minute, but we're back!