A/N: Well, hello there, FF Net world. Thanks to the pandemic, I have more time to spend at time and use my creative energy. Here you go, the result. R&R. Hope you all are doing well and staying safe and healthy in these crazy times!

Chapter 10: Bruises on Both My Knees for You

White shirt, now red, my bloody nose

Sleepin, you're on your tippy toes

Creepin, around like no one knows

Think you're so criminal

Bruises on my both my knees for you

Don't say thank you or please

I do what I want when I'm wanting to

My soul? So cynical

"bad guy", Billie Eilish

I walked into the suite, donuts in hand, and Pam was standing there in the kitchen, looking akin to a Raggedy Ann doll but with less makeup.

"Donuts?" She perked up immediately.

"Yes, dear." I held out the box to her, and she snatched it so quickly I think I got a papercut from the box.

"Jesus, calm your tits." I raised an eyebrow.

"I told you, life sucker." She said, pointing at her rounding belly, disguised somewhat well by an empire-waist peasant top with leggings.

"Boys are stupid." I declared. I then very dramatically sat hard on the couch, folding my arms across my chest.

She munched on the first donut, "Yes, that's very accurate. Can you elaborate why you chose this moment to point this out?"

"You would not believe my morning."

"That's vague."

"I ran into Bruce." I said. I figured I'd start with that.

Pam padded over in her fuzzy socks and plopped next to me on the couch, "Where?"

"I was going to Starbucks by Penn Station."

"Why all the way over there?"

I glared at her, "Ask me why one more time."

"Sorry, continue."

"You cannot tell Jay."

"I don't like that." She said, closing her eyes and exhaling deeply, "That is never a good start."

"I…um…I met up with Rob."

Pam just stared at me, and then finally got out, "Rob…Callahan? Evil ex-douche-man Rob?"

"The very same."

"Girrllllllllllllll." She breathed.

"Couldn't have said it better myself." I concurred, rubbing my temples, "I did a real dumb this time."

"In comparison to the other times?"

"Ok, well, maybe this is like a 6 or 7 out of 10 on the 'Harley does a dumb' scale." I admitted.

"What did you guys talk about? Why did you meet up with him in the first place?"

"After that article, I had the urge to address it with him. I mean, technically you sort of told me to do it."

"Don't you put that voodoo on me, Harleen Quinzel!" Pam snapped, "I didn't tell you to do shit!"

"Ok, fine, I am just trying to practice what I tell him when he inevitably finds out about this." I sighed, "Can I tell him it's a little bit your fault?"

"No." she said flatly.

"He can't be that mad at you because you're pregnant." I proffered.

"Ok, you can blame me a little tiny bit." Pam amended, "Continue."

"So, yeah, I texted him and he was open to meeting up. He set the place and I went there this morning while you were sleeping. I was on my way there, and I ran into Bruce. He was standing, waiting to cross that street, and girlfriend, he looked a damn mess. Literally like a homeless sloppy hobo but with better clothes. I guess, kinda like Keanu Reeves, how he looks on the daily."

"I am picturing it." Pam said, nodding.

"Yeah, so, I tried to avoid him and then he was all pissed off because I did that, and then I told him what was happening. He insisted on attending this rendezvous with him under the guise of needing coffee, but really it was to spy on me, I can imagine."

"Well, he might have been worried about you." Pam shrugged.

"Perhaps, yes. He truly hates Rob. I did feel a little better knowing he was not real far away, just in case anything went seriously awry. But Rob was fine. He actually seemed kind of afraid of me, in a weird way." I said, musing, "Like the Joker was just going to appear out of nowhere and beat the piss out of him."

"I wouldn't exactly put it past him."

"True, true," I grudgingly agreed, "I just spoke to my peace to him about the article, and then I asked him to bail Jay and I out."

"What, like the whole amount?!" Pam said. She had long finished all her donuts at this point.

"No, no, just…half."

"Half? That's like 10 million. He's seriously going to give you 10 million dollars?! How in the hell did you manage that?"

"Yes, I would like to know that, too." A voice said, quietly, menacingly, from the door.

FUCK.

Pam audibly gasped.

I slowly turned, and smiled awkwardly, "Babe, you're home."

"Keep talking." He said, crossing the room and sitting in the armchair across from me. He didn't look great, like he hadn't slept for the past couple of nights. His skin was still a little raw from scrubbing off the makeup, and his stubble was starting to grow in.

"Are you sure you don't want to lie down for a bit and we can talk about this later?"

"That's going to be a hard no."

"Can I offer you sexual favors instead?"

"That's a less hard no, but this is more important. Who is giving you 10 million dollars?"

"Oh, so you didn't hear the first part. Bruce Wayne is." I said quickly.

"No, he's not. That came out way too fast and your eyes were darting around like you were already calculating what you were going to say before you even said it. I know you better than that." He inspected his nails, "Tell me the fucking truth."

"Ok, ok, well, I wanted to do this in a much more thought-out way, but Rob is giving me the money." I braced for impact.

…but nothing came.

I stared at him. He stared at me.

"You're not mad?" I asked hesitantly.

"I don't have a clue who Rob is, and why he would give you money." He said, looking totally bewildered.

"Are you fucking serious?" I snapped, "Rob?"

"Who the hell is Rob?"

"You don't know who he is?" Pam chimed in.

"Seriously, you don't know-"

"WHO IS ROB?!" the Joker yelled above me and Pam.

"My college ex-boyfriend. You know, piece of shit who ruined my life ROB." I clarified.

"That was that guy's name? So? How does he have 10 million dollars?"

"What in God's name are you talking about? Am I losing it?" I asked to the ceiling, looking around, "I literally feel like I am in the Twilight Zone. What do you mean, how does Rob Callahan have 10 million dollars?!"

"Rob Callahan." He repeated.

"Yes."

"Rob CALLAHAN was your ex-boyfriend?" He asked, slumping back into the chair, "Rob, your college ex, is goddamn American royalty? His grandfather was like secretary of the defense."

"Yes, I am well aware of that. RC III showed me all the pictures in his house of him meeting some world leaders and hanging out with like Donald Rumsfeld or something. I didn't pay that much attention. He was a crusty old dude. I don't know if he liked me."

The Joker was staring at me like I had spontaneously grown an extra limb, "Jesus Lord. So when you said you and your family were rich, you mean, you were like very rich."

"I had a red Ferrari on a state psychiatrist's salary and a penthouse in Manhattan. What didn't you tip you off about that?" I quipped.

"I honestly don't know." He said, his voice sounding far away, "Be that as it may, how are you planning to get 10 million dollars out of this man?"

"Let's just say I have a fair amount of dirt on that family that they would prefer not see the light of day." I said smugly.

"Like what?" Pam queried.

"His younger brother is a very popular drag queen down in Argentina. Mostly he prefers to be called 'Marina del Rey' on stage. His partner Raul is very nice. We're still friends on Facebook."

Pam started chuckling, "Well, I can see how the blue-blooded Callahan's would prefer no one know about that. How did they explain where he's been all this time?"

"Oh, they said he got a job with the department of state or something. I don't fully remember. Plus, his mom is a major alcoholic. It was nothing to see that woman have six martinis at lunch."

"Sounds about right for that set." Pam snorted, "This one guy I dated at Harvard before Jason, their family had a house out on Cape Cod, you know, the typical one with like everything being blue and white and their napkins had little embroidered lobsters on them."

"Oh, God. I've been there." I said, patting her shoulder in solidarity.

"Yeah, she could really put them away. I mean, mommy dearest is no stranger to a glass of wine, let me tell you, but those East Coasters have nothing on her."

"I don't think that's really the worst of it. But, his mom would tell me a lot of stuff when she was wasted because she trusted me."

"Why would she trust you so much?" the Joker interjected.

"I mean, I was basically going to marry her son. I spent all my summers at that house. I got to know everyone pretty well."

"I didn't realize you guys were that involved." He said, sounding a tad on the jealous side. He was trying to hide it, but I could tell from the way his eyes quickly darted away when I tried to meet them.

"Psh, well yeah, we dated for almost 6 years. We had a plan. I mean, I guess, I had a plan. Date for all of college, get through graduate school and law school together, propose at graduation, have a big old extravaganza – serving Martha's Vineyard in a white Vera Wang realness – and pop out a couple of kids. Then he could go ahead and cheat on me because I'd be too busy working for a non-profit and doing yoga to care. I could have called it a motherfucking day if that was my life."

Pam and Jay both were staring incredulously at me.

"That's what you really wanted?" Pam spoke first.

"When I was like 19, 20, sure. That's all I knew. Why wouldn't my life be any different? Then he totally fucked it up by banging Kathy and catching feelings for her." I felt my face contorting into a very solid frown, like it usually did when a thought about Rob or Kathy passed through my mind.

"Well, what if he really loves her?" he asked.

I whipped around to look at him, "This, coming from you?"

"I mean, everyone falls in love with someone. I fell in love with you, despite the very numerous reasons why I shouldn't have. It's not always convenient or right, but it happens."

"Well, look at you, being all wise." I said thoughtfully, "I was just so angry at the time, I couldn't think about anything else. It totally shattered me."

"That's understandable." Pam grasped my hand, "You loved him."

"Near the end, not really. I just thought it was what I deserved. I never in a million years thought that Rob would pay attention to me. He was the golden boy in high school, the one who was going places. I read Jane Austen and pretended I was too good for everybody. Anyway, the point is, he knew what he was supposed to do. What everyone expected us to do. But, as usual, he had to do a complete 180 and implode his life that everyone planned for him. Which, honestly, I don't blame him now for doing. I did it. That's how I ended up in this bizarro world with you two."

"I wouldn't change that for anything." Pam said, embracing me.

"I wouldn't either, hon." I squeezed her tightly.

"Oh no." she said, jumping up.

"Ok, see you later." I said, knowing what was coming. She bolted from the room, leaving Mr. J and I together.

"So…" I said, trying to break the silence.

"I am still absorbing this." He chewed on his lip, "Is he really going to give us the money?"

"Yes." I went in my wallet, and handed the check to him, "This was a down payment."

His eyes widened when he saw the amount on the check, and then he got up from the chair, leaned down and kissed me hard.

"Goddamn if you're not a sneaky bitch, and I love it." He breathed after we broke the kiss.

"So, you're not mad?" I inquired hopefully.

"I'm still like 10% mad, but it's waning." He admitted. He slowly moved his finger down my cheek, to my neck. I shivered a little.

"I miss touching you." He said quietly.

"You can touch me." I retorted, "I am not stopping you."

"Yes, but you won't let me show you that I am not going to betray your trust again."

"Well, I don't know that you won't."

"Can't you let me prove it to you?"

"I promise I will wear a condom."

"That's a start." I said.

"You hid your birth control from me."

"That concerns me that you know that." I glared at him, "Were you looking for it?"

"I promise you, I am not going to try and get you pregnant again. I only did it the first time because it was what you wanted but you wouldn't admit it."

I shoved past him, "You're going the wrong fucking direction if you think this is going to help me feel better about our physical relationship. I love our daughter, don't get me wrong, but I wanted the choice."

"You know I am sorry about that. I just got desperate." He said, following me into our bedroom.

I slammed the door.

"You were desperate? Yeah, right. As always, you just want to control what I do."

"Well, you had the baby."

"Yes, I did. Because I didn't have a reason not to, in the end. How would you have felt if I had aborted our child?"

He fell silent.

"Yeah, exactly. You would have never forgiven me." I felt the tears welling up, as much I didn't want them to, "You would have hated me forever."

"I could never hate you. If you had done that, I can't say how I would have reacted, because it didn't happen, but I am glad you loved me enough to give me the privilege of being a parent. You know, when my wife died, and she was pregnant, I fell into such a spiral. I didn't know if I would ever get out. I honestly thought it had been my only chance to become a father. And then I met you. I wanted more than anything to have a child with you. I love you more than I ever loved her, and I love you more than I will ever love anyone. You're everything, Harley."

I felt inclined to believe him. It still stung, the betrayal. It really did. But I missed being intimate with him. It felt strange to not be, but I had somewhat gotten accustomed to it.

I stepped forward and kissed him deeply. He took advantage of the opportunity and gently pushed me backward, toward the wall. He threw my arms above my head, and kissed me harder, my lips, my cheeks, my neck, my collarbone. We both breathed hard together, wrapped up in the moment. It all happened so fast; suddenly, his hands were at the button of my pants, and then they were off, thrown somewhere across the floor. He moved his hand to the waistline of my underwear, and then paused.

"Are you ok?" he asked softly in my ear.

I actually felt a little overwhelmed with my emotion, that he asked. "Yes," I replied, and I gasped as he went to work. I felt my lower back arch against the door and let out a moan.

"Goddamn it, I have to have you." He said, his voice overcome with a million emotions at once.

"Then have me."

He stared undoing his pants and leaned forward. I put a hand on his chest, "Uh, hello? Did you forget?"

"Sorry, sorry." He stepped away quickly and I made sure he put that damn condom on. I wasn't getting my ass fooled again, y'all. Be proud of me.

"Better." I said, and he smirked, and then I almost yelped as he entered me. It was weird, I almost forgot the feeling of that, the feeling like a void is being filled (well, literally). We moved together like the time apart had never happened, and when we finished, we collapsed against each other, sweat glistening on our foreheads. I stared at him for a long moment, and then kissed him again.

We smiled at each other.

"Uh, I hate to be awkward, but are you guys done? I am literally still in the bathroom, and your sex sounds are really halting my ability to pee." Pam said through the wall.

"She needs to get her own place." Jay remarked.

…

"So, are you going to give me that check then?" he asked, sipping his coffee. We were sitting at the kitchen island.

"When you've earned it." I retorted.

"I have a feeling I did something to earn it." He grinned.

I stared at him, deadpan, "Don't even go there." I crossed the room to get my purse, and handed him the check, "Consider this a deposit on our future that I hope we can have. If SOMEONE would stop paying people obscene amounts of money to kill Bruce Wayne, then maybe we can have a sense of normalcy sooner rather than later."

He stared at the check, clearly not listening to me, "God damn, who just writes a check for 2 million dollars?" he mused.

"The Callahan's can." I shrugged, "Actually, I think that was his great-grandfather's political campaign slogan. He ran for president once. Republican. Of course."

"Do you know the whole history of the Callahan family?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yes, it is important if you're going to be betrothed to one." I said in a fake British accent, "One must have tea with Grandmama once a month."

"You…have really lived a very different life than I have." He said after a brief pause.

"That life is exhausting. You can never really be yourself." I said, perching on the kitchen stool, "Yes, it's obviously nice to have the summer house and the regattas and the, you know, not really ever worrying about money thing, but we lived in a bubble. Until I went to NYU, I didn't know what struggle was. I still never really knew. I mean, my parents paid for my shit and I was dating a governor's son, so let's say I was definitely suspended in a different reality, but at least I had professors and other students who sort of brought me down to earth and made me realize that there were other facets of society I knew nothing about. I couldn't have been a psychiatrist without at least attempting to understand it."

"But yet, you made friends with Pamela Isley, another trust fund brat." He scoffed.

"I take offense to that!" Pam yelled from down the hallway.

"Do you have the bathroom door open?" I asked, crinkling my nose.

"I'm just vomiting!" she said in return.

"That's still gross!" I turned to the Joker, "Anyway, Pam's family is new money. They're like Seattle bougie, that's totally different. The Callahan's, the Quinzel's, we can trace our lines to like the 1600's. That's generations of inherited bougie. We're not even bougie, we're bourgeoisie. Like, the original, not the truncated term."

"Good lord." He blinked, no reaction on his face, "I just…wow."

"Well, I mean not really bourgeoisie, more like…Marie Antoinette's less wealthy cousin."

"Can you please find your way to the point of this conversation?"

"I think I would need Google Maps to get there." I paused, "Where was I? Oh, my bad. Ah yes, the Callahan family history. I was quizzed on it every summer. As if Martha's wasn't boring enough."

"Was Martha his grandmother?"

I stared at him, "Martha's. Martha's Vineyard."

"You're looking at me as if I have 3 heads."

"Yes, well, who doesn't know what Martha's Vineyard is?"

"A poor person."

"I am not commenting on poverty because you'll turn it around on me. Anyway, the Callahan's accepted me. They told me everything. The good, the bad, everything. I mean, they assumed Rob and I were going to get married."

"Why would they assume that?"

"They wanted us to get married, to keep up the 1 percent bloodlines. They liked me much better than Kathy, I will tell you that. Kathy was not even in the 1 percent. Kathy wore Nordstrom Rack, not Nordstrom. She was in like the 20 percent. Christ. Ugh. Anyway, they gave him a ring to give me, it was that serious. I was carrying on planning our future wedding in my head, knowing I would have to wait until I finished my PhD but that was not going to stop him from getting that vintage Tiffany. God, fucking gold digger." I snorted out of my nose like a horse, "Fuck.'

"You're not salty at all." He said, sipping his coffee.

"Me, salty, never." I said dismissively.

He rolled his eyes. I came very close to saying 'they'll get stuck that way' because my own mother used to say that all the time to me as a teenager. I was a moody teen. My hobbies included hiding in corners with a book and ironically unironically buying band t-shirts at Hot Topic. It was really a magical time for my parents.

"So, are you going to cash that, then?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah, but I have to play this cool. It's not exactly like I would have just have a 2 million check."

"Can't you just give it to the bad people?"

"A check that has Robert Callahan's name on it?" he inquired, raising his eyebrows.

"Ah, I see the issue."

"Nothing gets past you."

"Don't get fussy."

"I am not fussy."

"You're being fussy. Anyway, what more do you need from me? I will find a way to get more money from him."

"You really think you can get the 10 million?"

"You doubt my alluring feminine wiles?" I said, striking a very dumb pose.

"You know, somehow I really do."

"You literally just had sex with me." I folded my arms across my chest.

"I would be stupid not to take the opportunity when I am given it."

"Ok, fair point. You are a man, after all, your penis controls everything you do. I accept the reality. In any case, you work on getting that money to the people who were going to blow up my ex-fiancé, and I will work on extorting more money from my ex-boyfriend to pay for it."

He stared at me.

"…god, my life is a total shitshow."