It had been a long day, especially because he had to try to dig out some information without it being too obvious. By the time he made it home, he was irritated and cranky. Hobart kept shooting him questioning glances which Lawson pointedly ignored.

So far, he had more questions than answers. As the day progressed, Lawson found himself more upset than he wanted to admit. Not even the fact Charlie was doing better made his irritation go away.

Still, he ate the dinner at the table and attempted not to show any of his feelings.

Unfortunately, both Jean and Lucien were perceptive people. They glanced at each other and without a word, Lucien poured him a glass of whiskey. He poured himself a shot as well and Jean got a glass of sherry as they settled in the living room. Charlie was currently asleep in Matthew's bed and that was just one more point of Matthew's disgruntlement.

"What's eating you?" Blake asked after a moment.

"You mean besides a too nosy police surgeon?"

Blake quirked an eyebrow.

"You barely said a word."

"Not much to talk about."

"Really? Nothing to talk about?"

Lawson sighed, taking a sip, then shook his head.

"Not yet."

Blake frowned.

"Your contact didn't give you any information?"

"It takes time. And the higher the problem, the longer it takes."

Blake gave a slow nod. Jean was settled next to him, half buried in his side. They both looked as if they hadn't slept a wink.

"Listen... why don't you two take a nap or something?" Lawson spoke up suddenly. Jean shot him a suspicious look.

"What? You both look done in. Lucien, you said Charlie is doing better. He hardly needs you to sit by his bedside another night."

Blake and Jean shared a look, seemingly uncomfortable. Lawson's eyes narrowed.

"Did something happen?" he asked, sensing that they were keeping things from him.

Blake waved his hand.

"Nothing you need to be concerned about, Matthew. But... I'd rather someone checked in on Charlie regularly tonight. The infection seems to react well to the medication, but it can be a tricky thing."

"Well, I can look in on him once or twice... and you can set an alarm for later if you want to."

Blake still seemed ready to protest, but Jean barely hid a yawn. Matthew gave them a pointed look and soon they were off.

That's how he found himself sitting in Charlie's room... or rather in his own room momentarily occupied by one sleeping senior sergeant.

It didn't take too long for Charlie to notice his presence. Despite Matthew calmly sitting on the chair in the corner of the room and reading a book under the small bedside lamp, barely making any noise, Charlie woke up.

It was easy to notice really. First, his breathing sped up... then it slowed down to a measured pace. Lawson put the book away and saw Charlie's body tensing at the sound he made.

Lawson barely held back an irritated sigh of his own. This was just one more sign that the situation hadn't been under control in the last few weeks. After all, Charlie should know there was nothing to fear in the safety of home.

He was of half mind to speak up and reassure the man it was just him and there was nothing to worry about. But he felt a little bit petty. It was hard not to, seeing the old and recent bruises on his sergeant's face, seeing the usually clean shaved man sporting a stubble that would shortly rival that of Blake's own. Right now, with his eyes closed, body tense and hair dishevelled, Charlie looked like a stranger. Lawson hated that... hated the fact he had to remind himself it was still Charlie, that what he went through was a simple undercover case. That once the bruises healed and the stubble was gone, the old careless Charlie would return.

There was a momentary lull during which neither men moved, few long seconds where neither of them breathed. Then Charlie's eyelids fluttered and finally Lawson could see the familiar blue peeking out from under.

Charlie blinked a few times as his eyes slowly scanned the room. It didn't take long for them to settle on Lawson, who was leaning forward, elbows resting on knees, waiting.

There was a moment where he could swear he saw panic flash through Charlie's eyes, but then they focused on his face and Charlie's whole body relaxed.

"Boss," he breathed out and looked around in some confusion. "What're you doing here?"

Lawson raised a brow.

"Well, it is my room if I'm not mistaken," he said, unable to help himself. The sudden blush on Charlie's face as he realized that almost made his anger evaporate. Only almost though.

"Sorry," Charlie said and made an effort to sit up. Lawson wasn't sure if he was actually planning on leaving the room, but he wasn't about to wait and see. He got up and pulled the chair across the room before Charlie could as much as throw off the blanket. He settled back in it, now properly facing Charlie, who squirmed under the sudden gaze.

"Uh... boss? I... I can go to my room," he offered, almost hopefully.

Lawson shrugged.

"I think that's up to Blake. Seeing as both he and Jean are asleep, you will have to wait."

Charlie swallowed, his eyes turning into a thoughtful frown. He glanced around the room, at the clock on the bedside table. The time seemed to confuse him, but he didn't ask. Lawson hid a smirk. It was barely past nine, so Blake and Jean sleeping weren't something usual.

"They had a long night yesterday," he had the need to add. "For some reason, they spent most of it awake... taking care of a reckless fool."

At that, Charlie once again froze, staring at Lawson. Lawson was glad to see his eyes were mostly clear. He still looked a bit feverish but Lawson would be sooner caught dead than checking Charlie's temperature while the man was awake.

"You're angry," Charlie stated and Lawson leaned back in the chair, arms crossed over his chest. Charlie seemed to falter under the glare, but then he straightened his shoulders. Or at least tried to. He was stopped by a wince and a pained grimace crossed his face.

Lawson was not going to offer any sympathy.

If the glare on his face softened a bit, it was purely coincidental.

"I am not angry."

That might've been a lie. Charlie's doubtful look showed that he didn't believe those words either.

"Not at you," Lawson said. Before Charlie could sigh in relief though, Lawson added: "I'm a bit disappointed though."

Even as he said it he wished he could take it back. Not because it wasn't true... but he really didn't enjoy seeing Charlie's face pale more than it already was.

Damn. This was going to be harder than he thought. Maybe he should've just waited until the kid wasn't looking like death warmed over. He wanted to rip him a new one, for scaring the hell out of him when he called them, but it was impossible to do right now. Lawson ran a hand over his face, stifling a frustrated groan.

"Boss?" Charlie's tone was timid, hesitant.

Lawson hated that.

"I think you heard me, Davis," Lawson snapped back, the anger suddenly back. "What on earth were you thinking?"

Charlie looked at him, confused. Then something flashed in his eyes and they turned wide. Charlie shook his head and Lawson was startled to see his body was shaking.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't know... I thought- I swear I didn't mean to hurt her!" he babbled, breath coming out fast as he was suddenly struggling to get out of bed.

Lawson was totally lost.

He didn't have a clue what the man was talking about, but his confusion gave way to concern when Charlie managed to pull off the blanket and put his legs onto the floor. His whole body was shaking yet he was determined to get up, to do something.

"What on earth?" Lawson called out and leapt to his feet, putting a restraining arm on Charlie's shoulder. Their eyes met and he was overwhelmed by the guilt staring at him from those blue eyes.

"Hey, calm down! I don't want to wake up the whole house-"

Charlie shook his head.

"I need to apologize," he mumbled and attempted to stand, but two things stopped him. One was Lawson's own hand keeping him down, the other was that the moment he put pressure on the bitten leg, it seemed to cause quite a bit of pain.

"Bloody fool, get back in the bed!" Lawson snapped, losing his patience. He really didn't fancy Jean or Blake bursting through the door and pestering him about getting Charlie worked up.

Charlie faltered and his gaze became unfocused. He looked about a second away from fainting, so Lawson pushed him to lay back down on the bed. He grabbed his legs and positioned them back on the bed as well, trying to ignore the hiss of pain coming from Charlie at the movement. Once it was all done, he even went so far as to throw the blanket over the man. It was purely practical. He didn't want Charlie to catch a cold on top of everything. And he was not tucking him in at all.

"What am I gonna do with you?" Lawson muttered under his breath, while Charlie was trying to get a handle on himself.

"M sorry," Charlie mumbled and Lawson let out a groan of frustration, then sat down on the edge of the bed.

"What are you even apologizing for?" he asked, suddenly feeling more tired than angry. He kind of preferred the latter but it was hard to stay angry when seeing the misery on Charlie's face.

Lawson dug his fingers into the edge of the mattress. He was not going to give Charlie a reassuring pat or fluff up the awkwardly positioned pillow behind his back.

"I pushed her," came the soft words even as Charlie's look turned down, towards the blanket covering his chest. Suddenly he was unable to look at Lawson.

"Pushed who? What are you talking about?" Lawson asked, irritated by the seeming non sequitur, at the same time wondering if Charlie wasn't delirious. Maybe he could arrange that pillow and sneakily check if he wasn't burning up?

"Jean."

Lawson blinked. He wanted to repeat his question, sure that Charlie was confused. The kid would never raise a hand to Jean. After all, he adored her almost as much as his own mother. Lawson was already shaking his head, when he stopped. Jean's and Blake's strange reaction came to mind. Maybe that was it?

Lawson huffed. Great. Something happened and instead of being in the know about it, he now had to try and get the information out of his remorseful sergeant, when all he wanted to do was scold him for going behind his back. He would definitely have to have a word with those two later on, Lawson promised to himself.

Right now though he had to deal with this. Thinking back, it was easy to see where Charlie could have misinterpreted his words as reprimand for whatever happened. Lawson shot a look at the clock. Ten past nine. Great. Was it too late to go grab a shot of that whiskey?

"Whatever you think you have done Davis... I can assure you Jean is perfectly fine."

Charlie shook his head.

"I almost hit her."

Lawson didn't comment on that. He could see plain as sky that Charlie didn't meant to harm anyone. Not to mention, in the state he was in, Lawson doubted he could do much damage. Jean could probably take him down without breaking a sweat.

"Got startled?" he asked instead, trying to lead Charlie to the conclusion that it was indeed only an accident.

Charlie glanced up shortly, then shrugged.

"Didn't hear her," he muttered.

Lawson rolled his eyes.

"Look, I don't know what happened, but I know Jean is alright. And I'm pretty sure that she doesn't blame you. Nor does Lucien."

Charlie didn't say anything. He just pulled his broken arm up to his chest and tried to curl and uncurl his fingers.

Lawson wanted to reach out and grab Charlie's face, make the man look at him and see the truth on his own face. He didn't though. He felt that would be overstepping the familiarity between the two of them. Not to mention, there were other methods of getting Charlie's attention back on the subject at hand.

"In any case, that wasn't what I wanted to talk about." Lawson tried to make his tone stern, but it was hard. Still, he probably managed, seeing as Charlie's eyes shot up, questioning. Worried.

"Boss?"

"I thought you got over your need to please some idiots."

Charlie blinked, genuinely confused.

"I don't understand."

"You went undercover."

Charlie frowned.

"I've got an order," he said.

"From whom? Some idiot you have barely met? Or a guy who you didn't even see?"

"Boss, you know how it goes," Charlie said a bit defensively. "I didn't get much choice."

"I know that you had enough time to give me a call."

"O'Leary said-"

"Not to contact me?" Lawson jumped in, his voice turning cold. "Since when do you blindly follow men like O'Leary? I thought the affair with Munro and the bloody troubles we had to protect Lucien would've been enough to cure you of blind fate."

Charlie shook his head.

"That was different."

"How so?"

"This didn't concern any of you."

Lawson paused. The answer came fast and while Charlie seemed to stand behind his words, the twitching fingers of his right hand had shown his nervousness.

Something wasn't right about it and it took a moment for Lawson to put the picture together. He didn't like what he saw though.

"What were you trying to prove?" he snapped all of a sudden. Charlie startled, looking at him once again with wide eyes.

"Was this some stupid career move?"

The fact Charlie couldn't answer right away was enough of a reply and Lawson snorted, disgruntled.

"Damn it, Davis. I didn't think you would get bored of Ballarat so fast," the disappointment colouring his voice was strong. He couldn't help it though. Somewhere in the back of his mind he was trying to prepare Charlie to become his successor. When Charlie asked about the recommendation for the detective program, Lawson grumbled and worried, but soon figured the man would be back. And having a detective lead the station in a town like Ballarat, with how much of a magnet for trouble the place seemed to be, was quite a good idea. Charlie also didn't mention anything about leaving. But now he went behind his back, risked his life to try and prove something. Maybe to get a better job offer as well.

So Lawson was disappointed. In Charlie for doing so, in himself for believing his plans could work out so easily. What right did he even had? To try and keep Davis in Ballarat?

While Lawson was mulling over all this, reprimanding himself internally, Charlie's face was turning from one of confusion to realization. And whatever conclusion he came to, it wasn't one he was happy about.

"I wasn't planning on leaving," Charlie burst through Lawson's bubble. He was struggling to sit up, clearly not wanting to have this conversation lying down.

Lawson let him, sure that any offer of help would be rebutted.

"You have a fun way of showing that," Lawson snapped back.

Charlie took in a breath, obviously trying to calm down or take some control over his body.

"It... didn't concern you," was all Charlie said, almost coldly.

Lawson's eyes narrowed.

"Pardon me?"

Charlie glared.

"I think I have a right to know that my second in command is about to let himself get beaten half to death in some ridiculous undercover stint!" Lawson said, or maybe shouted. He wasn't sure anymore.

"Why? Does Blake inform you about everything?"

The question came out of the left field.

"What in bloody hell are you talking about?"

Charlie shook his head stubbornly.

"I got an order, I followed it."

"Yeah, look where it got you."

Charlie's face turned a strange shade of red.

"I did exactly what I was supposed to," Charlie grunted, his right arm curling around his stomach. The conversation was obviously stressing him out, but Lawson couldn't stop it now.

"What are you trying to prove?" Lawson repeated his question.

Charlie looked away for a moment, but then his gaze returned and his eyes met Lawson's.

"That I can do it alone too."

Lawson froze.

"Why? Why do you need to do it alone?"

Charlie shrugged.

"I just wanted to know I could do it myself... without you or the Doc. I had to know... that I was good at my job."

"Jesus Christ, Charlie," Lawson let out a breath, one hand rubbing at his eyes tiredly. "Of course you can. Why would you even question yourself?"

Charlie was looking at him a bit awkwardly now. There was surprise in his eyes, but also denial.

"I barely do anything... it's all Blake or you solving cases. And after Ned and how easily Baker got the drop on me..." Charlie shook his head. "I just needed to know."

"Know what?"

"That I can be a good cop."

Lawson didn't know what to say. He wanted to strangle the kid for ever doubting himself. He wanted to tell him how stupid it all was, because anyone who could handle Blake had to be good at their job. Most of all he wanted to tell Charlie that it didn't matter anyway, because they weren't going anywhere.

All those thoughts and emotions battled inside him and the longer it took for him to speak, the more crestfallen Charlie looked. Lawson took a calming breath.

"First of... I don't have a clue why you are doubting yourself. You helped take down Munro, despite Lucien's misgivings about you and I wasn't there holding your hands either. As to what happened to Ned..." Lawson grimaced. He still felt his stomach constrict at the fate of the young constable. And for what reason? Because a deranged father wanted a revenge on Lucien. A young life lost unnecessarily. "That wasn't your fault."

"I should've been there," Charlie said through half clenched teeth.

"No. You were out on a call, doing what you were supposed to do. And about Baker getting the drop over you, it could happen to the best of us. I heard Bill was helping you out in that matter anyway."

Charlie blinked and Lawson's mouth twitched. Of course he knew about the training sessions at the gym. After all, Bill wasn't too keen on giving Charlie a one on one before Lawson had a chance to have a little talk with him.

"You knew?" Charlie asked, sounding taken aback. Lawson rolled his eyes.

"I know about everything that's going on in my town," he said and saw the twitch of amusement in Charlie's eyes. "Don't you dare argue with me on that," he warned and Charlie quickly shut his mouth.

"I'd like to think I know all that is going on with my people as well," Lawson added in a more serious tone. Charlie grimaced.

"I'm not here to argue with you right now, Charlie. I might... understand your motives, not that I agree with the results. But... that's my problem, not yours," Lawson admitted. "You're an adult and if you ever decide to take over the station, you sure as hell need to make your own decisions."

Charlie's head shot up at that, eyes wide in surprise.

"What?"

"You heard me... and I'm not going to repeat myself," Lawson said gruffly, drawing a line at actually giving out some kind of compliment. "Now scoot down and go back to sleep. I can hear someone sneaking in the hall and I don't want to get pestered for keeping you up."

Charlie still looked somehow flabbergasted, but at least that hurt look was off his face. He also gazed towards the door, but that didn't move.

"Boss, I..." Charlie paused, biting on his bottom lip. Lawson waited and he was rewarded by a soft "-thanks."

He sighed.

"Thank me once all this is over," Lawson said wearily, knowing that the trouble still wasn't over. Charlie gave him a slightly remorseful look, but then just silently nodded.

"Alright. Down. I think I need to grab a drink or something, before heading to bed. If you need anything, call out. Someone is bound to hear you."

"Boss?" Charlie called out when Lawson was almost by the door. He turned, uttering a gruff "Yeah?"

"L-leave it open a bit?" Charlie asked, looking at the door. Lawson frowned, but then nodded.

"Was planning to. How else would anyone hear you?"

Charlie's lips twitched into a smile.

Lawson left the room before the bloody fool could thank him again. He had already hit his limit of emotional outpours for one day.

"I thought you would be asleep already. Or well... at least stay in the presence of your lovely wife," Lawson spoke as he entered the living room.

"What can I say. Jean fell asleep on the spot and I decided to see what all the raised voices were about," Blake said, handing him a glass of whiskey while he already had one poured.

"Raised voices?"

"Well, I mostly just heard you," Blake admitted.

"Uh huh," Lawson took the glass and settled on the couch. "Yet you decided to sneak around instead of interfering? How quaint of you, Lucien."

Blake shrugged, taking a sip of the drink.

"You seemed to have it under control. Though I can't say riling Charlie up was the best decision," Blake said with a bit of a scowl.

"It wouldn't have happened if you told me he got in a skirmish with Jean," Lawson bit back.

"Wasn't worth mentioning."

Lawson raised a brow and Blake shrugged.

"You handled it alright."

"I didn't think I would have to handle that," Lawson growled. Really... he wanted to rip Charlie a new one because he thought he took the case to get in a good word on a promotion. He didn't think Charlie felt so insecure about his abilities as to risk his life heedlessly. That just... didn't seem to be his style.

Blake sighed, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. It seemed that there was more keeping him awake than just an early hour.

"Anything else troubling you, Lucien?" Lawson asked, knowing his friend a bit too well. Blake glanced at him, seemingly lost in thought.

"I didn't think my involvement in the cases would bother Charlie so much," he admitted and Lawson frowned.

"I don't think that's what bothers him," he said frankly. This time it was Blake who quirked an eyebrow in question.

"Well yes, of course. The fact you show your nose into every case might be a pain in the ass. But I figure we all got used to it by now," Lawson waved it off, ignoring Blake's disgruntled look.

"What then?"

"What, you didn't stay to listen to all?"

Blake's look didn't budge.

"He needed to prove himself. I get that actually. Doesn't mean I approve of the method, but what can one do," Lawson said with an air of acceptance.

"And? Do you think this managed to do it?"

Lawson gave it a moments though, then shrugged.

"I don't have a bloody clue."

"You realize this thing isn't over yet," Blake grumbled, the concern clearly palpable in his eyes. Lawson nodded. "He will want to see this through."

"As he should."

"So you will let him? Do this alone?"

Lawson raised a brow at that, his lip quirking up in a smirk.

"He can do whatever he wants."

Blake waited.

"Just like we can do what we want," Lawson added after a second and Blake smiled.

"And what we want is to help," Blake said and Lawson raised his glass.

Of course. After all, Charlie was part of their family. There was no hell or high water that would make them leave Charlie to handle this alone.