Chapter 5

It was two days later that Harry encountered his writer's block. No, in reality, it wasn't that. It was a startling breakthrough he had made in figuring out who Draco's crush was. And the answer, literally crushed him into despair of the deepest kind. The last time he felt that had been when he saw Remus's body and the time before that had been when Sirius passed through the veil. Harry knew he was often dubbed four eyed and he detested it with every fibre of his being. He couldn't help but laugh at the irony of him thinking that about himself. Because he had been blind in spite of his four eyes. The answer was right before him, he saw it too and yet didn't recognise the importance of it. For such glaring errors, people had to be both dumb and blind, Harry decided.

Craig McNeil. That was the answer to Harry's question. Once he got it, he understood why Draco had been single, why Draco didn't want to find his crush, why Draco didn't want his happy ending. It also explained why Draco went irrationally mad whenever Craig flirted with Harry. Oh and the reason for Craig's flirtations? To rile Draco up. Draco wanted Harry to forget about his crush because his crush was already married and a future together was impossible. How did Draco end up falling for a creep who was not only married but also seemed to enjoy rubbing his happy status in the face of the guy who very obviously loved him?

Harry looked sideways at the little brown owl who was pecking soundly at its treats. That was how Harry had figured it all out. The cute winged creature had flown in and dropped a package on Craig's head who petted it first before feeding it and tearing the package open. It contained two boxes of sweets which made rounds before reaching Craig once again. His wife was apparently pregnant with their fourth kid. The owl had been the same one that brought the note to Draco the day they went to the pub. And Harry had seen Craig and Draco in the restroom. What a fool he had been!

Harry folded his hands on the table in front of him and laid his head on them, sniffing back the tears that were already spilling down his cheeks. He had been secretly hoping he would turn out to be Draco's crush, because goddamnit, he had realised a little too late that he loved Draco. With all of his heart. And more. He loved Draco from the very depths of his soul but could never receive Draco's equally wonderful love. He knew Draco's love was wonderful. Because there was no other word that could better describe the patience and grit of a man who thought waiting an entire life for his love was a small thing. Harry's eyes closed of their own accord, leaking more tears onto his already wet cheeks. He didn't know how much time had passed but he opened his swollen lids when he felt a shadow over him.

Draco was kneeling beside him, one hand finding its way into Harry's hair, the other coming up to cup his face, thumbing away the tears still pouring copiously down his face. His grey eyes were swimming with such anguish and fear and he was being so tender with Harry that for a moment Harry thought he was indeed the man Draco loved.

'What happened, Harry?' Draco's broken voice asked, an insurmountable amount of worry seeping into his tone. 'Why are you crying? Are you in pain?'

Harry wanted to scream into Draco's face that yes, he was in excruciating pain from the way his heart was breaking into pieces but refrained, on seeing answering tears pooling in Draco's eyes.

'No,' he croaked, finally lifting his head to see the impressions of his spectacles embedded in the skin of his forearm. 'We have to submit by tomorrow and I don't know how to end this.' It was a half truth and it had to do. He couldn't get away with a full lie but he could escape with a half baked one.

'Oh Harry!' Draco sighed, leaning forward and hugging Harry's head to his chest, brushing his fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. 'I thought someone had insulted you or harassed you or something. I was so worried. I don't like seeing you cry. I don't ever want to see you cry,' he was babbling on and on.

'Harass me?' Harry asked confused and then realised he had gone out for air after his disappointing moment of epiphany. 'No, it's not that,' he sniffed.

'Thank Merlin for it,' Draco pulled back and stared at Harry, who felt suddenly shy.

'Um, well, you see I'm still where we left off last night,' Harry said bringing out his papers and setting them in front of Draco.

'Last night?' Craig piped up from behind them.

'You will mind your own business, McNeil, if you don't want a Crucio headed your way,' Pansy's voice said from above Harry's head. That was a typical Pansy Parkinson threat if Harry ever heard one and he had heard many.

'I won't think twice about a Sectumsempra, McNeil,' Draco warned, his voice as caustic as it was icy. And that was the Malfoy-Parkinson ultimatum the world backed away from. Craig included.

Harry tilted his head up into Pansy's panicked face. Pansy nodded down at him, ruffled her hair and said, 'Don't scare us, Harry.' With that she scuttled off.

Neville and Rolf, who had also been listening in, gave a slight nod and asked in identical tones, 'Alright, mate?'

'Yes.'

'Okay,' they nodded again and turned back to their desks.

'It's just a writer's block, Harry. Everyone faces it. It's fine,' Draco soothed, still rubbing circles along Harry's spine. 'Okay, so where were we? Yes, they are celebrating their fifth year of living together. Who celebrates such things anyway?'

Harry smacked his arm with the pen he was holding. 'You say, you were adamant about having this scene.'

'They are celebrating the fifth year of their freedom and it's actually Palmer's twenty-third birthday. Teddy's there and the three are having a lovely candle light dinner.' Draco turned the page and started reading. 'I see you've included a star filled sky on my advice..'

'Your insistence, more like,' Harry snorted and paused, something Draco had just said, crowding his thoughts and enticing those whispers to come wreak havoc on his delicate grey matter. There were goosebumps all over his skin from wisps of memory which proclaim similarity, that come back unexpectedly, triggered by trivial causes. Harry shuddered, causing Draco to grip his shoulder tightly.

'Whatever,' Draco dismissed, going through Harry's work. 'So they are sitting at a table on a rooftop restaurant with lilting music and stars lighting up the area. They've had dinner and they have an overexcited six year old with them. That's where you stopped.'

'Yes. I feel like they both should say something right now in this perfectly crafted moment but I don't know what it should be.'

Draco didn't lift his head from his critical examination of Harry's paper. 'There's only one thing they can say, right?' he asked, finally looking up and locking eyes with Harry.

Harry raised an eyebrow.

'I love you,' Draco whispered.

Harry flushed beet red right in front of Draco. He felt his breathing stutter even as his heart galloped at a wild rhythm.

'I love you, Henry, is what Diego should be saying.' Draco moved his gaze down to where his hands were rapidly crumpling the page.

That was Harry's breaking point. The words he desperately wanted to hear Draco say were pronounced alright, but they were neither directed at him nor were they coming from Draco.

Unable to take it any longer, he blurted out, 'I know about your crush.'

Harry wasn't surprised Draco was propelled into action by his words. He flicked his wand at their desks and once they were in order, produced a white wisp of a ferret. 'Tell Hermione Granger, Harry and I have gone home half day.' With that he herded Harry out of the door to the curious looks of the rest of their colleagues.

Harry felt the world closing in on him and drawing away from Draco's grasping fingers, sprinted to the loo. He splashed cold water on his face and heaved until he felt calm enough to breathe through his nose. There was the sound of a door creaking open and closed and one pair of uncertain footsteps approaching him. Harry didn't look up. Draco snaked his arms around Harry's waist from behind, leaned in completely and nosed along his cheek and jaw.

'Don't be blind, Harry,' he whispered into his ear. Harry was a tangled mess of emotions and sensations. Why was Draco acting in this manner? Until then, Draco had never initiated a single contact mannerism. Harry had always been the one jumping into his arms or pulling Draco into his. They had never kissed, not even on the cheek, not until that pub night a few days ago. And Harry still wasn't able to say what spirit possessed him that day to make him go all hands and skin and mouth on Draco.

Draco. A guy Harry had just realised he loved, a guy he'd have to sacrifice, a guy deeply in love with someone else. Craig, his mind instantaneously corrected, Draco loved Craig. That someone else was no longer a part of his imagination. He was now a physical entity. Harry wanted to vomit. He turned and ran into the nearest cubicle and emptied his stomach into the commode. Draco petted Harry's hair into a rough order and brushed back those strands that still stubbornly fell onto his forehead. Harry was becoming extremely troubled by Draco's mounting comfort techniques. They were making it harder for him to not just grab Draco, apparate home and ruin him for every other person on the planet.

He got up and rinsed his mouth. Finally, after exhausting all his options, he met Draco's eyes in the mirror.

'Is that idea so bad that you had to puke,' Draco asked with shimmering eyes.

'Bad is putting it mildly,' Harry spat. 'I want to hate it, but I can't. Because I don't ever want to see you sad or crying. Once itself was too much, Draco.' Harry was openly sobbing, his anger melting into tears and flowing out of him, but he couldn't care less about it. 'Since I can't put myself through this kind of torture and anguish again, I'm telling you now so listen properly. I'm sure you know this but Craig's married already Draco, it'll be hard but it's better if you at least start thinking of moving on.'

'That is what you were worried about?' Draco asked, crowding into Harry's personal space, and gripping the sink on either side of him.

'Don't do this,' Harry said turning around and leaning his face away from Draco's approaching one.

'Harry, look at me.'

Harry didn't, out of sheer obstinacy. But neither did Draco move an inch nor did he say anything else. Harry ultimately had to lift his eyes up to Draco's.

'My precious, precious Harry,' Draco smiled, wiping Harry's tears away. Harry was too stunned by the use of endearment to stop him. 'Craig is not my crush. And I'll tell you who my crush is at the end of our story. Based on your reaction here, I'm guessing you won't be offended. Trust me?'

Harry couldn't refuse when Draco requested so sweetly. He nodded.

'Will you think about the story?' Draco bent forwards and inhaled Harry's scent. Their bodies were attached from chest to hip and below.

'What is all this?' Harry asked, pushing Draco away and glaring at him.

'Retribution for pub. You were all hands and mouth on me that day. In public,' he emphasised.

'It's a piss poor attempt at a joke,' Harry retorted.

'Let's go home and work on it, we are free for the afternoon anyway,' Draco suggested.

'Can't wait to tell me who your crush is?'

The question was rhetorical. Hence, Draco's answer was unexpected. 'Actually, yes, I can't wait,' he winked.

It was 6.30 by the time Draco announced that he had finished the story. Harry was shaking with excitement. He didn't want to risk losing a single second more. It already had been the longest day of Harry's life, he wasn't going to prolong it further. Harry apparated into Draco's room and snatched the papers out of his hands.

'Careful,' Draco laughed and walked out.

Harry started reading.

"Henry and Diego shared a private smile, looking at their excited six year old, Remus. 'Papa, I lost count again,' he whined, looking down from the sky. Henry laughed out loud as Remus' chubby face began to contort into a pout that would descend into unending wailing all through the night if they didn't intervene at that stage. Diego, trying to distract Remus, picked him up, set him on his lap and pointed at the lamp posts standing on the terrace.

'They are too tiny, love. Count these, instead.'

For a few blissful minutes, Remus was engrossed in his task. 'Totally fourteen, Dad,' he yawned.

'Good boy,' Henry said, coming over and planting a kiss atop of his son's head.

Little Remus who was still angry at Henry started hitting him with his small fists. He buried his face in Diego's shoulder as Henry once again guffawed. He started for the elevator but was halted by Diego's hand on his arm. Henry looked at him quizzically. Diego motioned for him to stay and signalled the waiter who had served them. Remus was now dozing in his arms, drool leaking out of his mouth onto Diego's shirt. Henry stared in confusion as the waiter approached every couple dining on the rooftop. In less than ten minutes, it was empty save for the tables, chairs, the warm glow of the brightly shining lamps, a cool summer breeze and the twinkling of the half moon and stars.

'You already gave me my birthday gift, Diego,' Henry said, his lips curving in the hint of a smile.

'I know. I have something else also for you. Close your eyes.' Henry dutifully complied. Diego had already given him the best gift ever by confessing to him just half an hour ago. Henry wondered what else was remaining.

There was some shuffling and then Diego said, 'Open them now.'

The sight he beheld brought the tears he spilled thirty minutes ago back into his eyes. Diego was kneeling down, supporting a sleeping Remus on his propped up knee and holding up a ring in the other hand.

'Henry, we've gone through a lot together- school, war, life. We started off as possibly the worst kind of enemies. We hurt each other, bullied each other, constantly tried to pull each other down. It was the war that united us, strangely. We refused to give each other up at the times it mattered the most, even turning our backs, for that, on those who have been with us till then. That was when I realised I had strong feelings for you. Feelings that were seemingly backed by hatred. I learnt the hard way that there was only a thin line between love and hate. It wasn't until our eighth year school project, however, that I realised that we'd both crossed that line long ago. Together, we've somehow managed to survive it all and create this little family for ourselves. I'm grateful for your hug and kind words when I needed them the most and I'm grateful to you for letting me have a family with you. I want something more than war to bind us, however. So, you know I love you and this is all just a formality but will you accept me as your husband?'"

Harry stopped reading after that. He couldn't go on to the next line if his life depended on it. There was that familiar buzzing in his head as multiple mental vaults burst open from the overflow of emotions. Reading it from a third person point of view seemed to have put everything that was troubling him since the start of the story, every memory that was haunting him till then, screaming similar in his ears, into a proper perspective. On paper, it was Diego Malcolm proposing to Henry Palmer. But it also was Draco Malfoy as Diego Malcolm confessing to Harry Potter through Henry Palmer.

A/N- 'I don't like seeing you cry' is as cliche as it is genuine, in my opinion, because it is the expression of one thing we cannot bear to see our loved ones in-pain. We put up with their every emotion from anger and arrogance to indifference and happiness but we can't tolerate the sight of them in pain of any sort. And I think such words coming from two idiots who've been oblivious for a long time, except when the other was hurt, speaks of their love in plainer words than 'I love you.'