Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Star Wars or any of the amazing characters

Kylo

Things had improved between Falbell and Zer-o after getting their asses handed to them by Kylo. They were able to complete the task of assigning a captain and coming up with a plan. It was a good plan too, but the guys still lost to the girls. The girls came up with a good strategy and actually beat Kylo in a semi fair fight. After that the 8 of them seemed to work well together so things were coming along.

The only thing that still worried him was Rey. She still didn't seem like herself. Kylo knew there as a learning curve when it came to bonding with that dark little voice that always seemed to represent the dark side of the Force.

"Kylo, are you ready? We need to get to the briefing so that we can head out for sparring," Rey called back into the bedroom.

"Yeah," Kylo said strapping his light sabers to his belt. "Let's go," Kylo said coming to stand in the sitting room.

Rey glanced at him as he walked into the room and Kylo got a good look at her face.

His beautiful Rey has dark circles under her dull hazel eyes, her skin was much paler than even when they'd spent months away from a source of real sunlight on his ship in deep space. Her once shiny, lustrous hair was now dull and hung limply as though she hadn't bothered to do anything to it for days.

Kylo cursed. How had he not noticed this before? Was he so wrapped up in stopping Zoroyais that he had started neglecting Rey? Had the others noticed and just not said anything to him?

"Rey, you know you can tell me anything and I would never, could never judge you? There is nothing in this life that could make me love you any less than I do," he said moving to take her chin in his grip to make her look up at him.

It took her second to answer and as he waited for her to say something, her eyes shifted to the side as if she was looking at something or someone right next to him.

He went to enter her mind when she finally said, "Yes Kylo, I know. Your mother said something similar to me just the other day. Do I just look like there's something I need to get off my chest?"

Kylo flinched at the harsh tone of voice she was using. Rey never took such a tone with anyone especially him. At least not since they'd been together and he'd stopping killing members of the Resistance.

"You definitely don't look like your normal self, Rey. If this whole thing with the darkness is weighing on you too much, then that's something we need to discuss. I don't want to be the one who pushes you into the arms of the dark side based on a theory I have that can't even be proven at this point," he said staring down into her eyes. "If you need a counterbalance, I can be that. I...I only wanted to be Ben Solo again for you and my mother but if returning to the light means that I lose you to the darkness, I'd rather remain the monster known as Kylo Ren," he said in a voice so sad and sincere, tears had filled her eyes by the time he was done speaking.

As Rey's lower lip trembled, Kylo wanted to curse. When the tears spilled down her cheeks, Kylo pulled her in close and kissed them away. Kylo sighed as Rey wrapped her arms around his waist and held on tight.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you. My head is just all over the place," she sobbed a little. "I would like to stick with trying to integrate the darkness into my being for a little while longer. It's just... it's just so difficult. And the negativity...it's like trying to breathe underwater sometimes," she admitted.

This time Kylo did curse. What kind of man was he that he'd forced this on her? Surely, they could defeat Zoroyais and Hux without Rey having to suffer, right? After all, together they were the strongest Force users in this galaxy and the next.

"I'm sorry this is so difficult for you. I'm sure the experience was the same for me but being an already moody child and teenager probably masked a lot of the signs and symptoms," he told her.

Kylo stroked her back and laid gentle kisses on the top of her head. As he did so, he drew some of her darkness into himself. He hoped if she could accept a little piece of the darkness, it would be enough, and he also hoped that having less of the darkness in her would help.

"It was my choice to accept the dark side within myself, Kylo. You didn't make me. If I can't handle it in the end at least I'll have done everything I personally could in order to bring balance to the Force," Rey said and stepped back. She wiped her face and then said, "Let's go. We don't want to keep the others waiting without a good reason."

Kylo nodded.

She seemed a little better as they moved together to the meeting hall. She seemed a little lighter. Her mind felt lighter.

A tightness eased in his chest that Kylo hadn't known was there.

Leia was waiting for the couple when they arrived at the hall. Kylo moved to hug her, something they'd only recently been comfortable doing. Kylo didn't miss the tightness in the smile that his mother gave Rey.

"Rey why don't you go inside. Finn and Poe seemed worried about you," Leia said. "I need to speak to you, Kylo," she said in a quiet voice.

Kylo nodded. He turned Rey toward him and kissed her gently on the lips. With a reassuring smile he sent her on a head of them. Then he turned toward his mother, face grim.

"What is wrong," he asked in a low tone.

"I'm worried about Rey," Leia murmured, her voice a tad shaky.

Kylo looked his mother. What had she seen that he hadn't?

"Tell me," he demanded.

"I heard Rey talking to herself yesterday in the kitchen," she said quickly. "Like you used to back before we sent you to Luke's. I know now that it was Snoke you were talking too… And I just wanted to you to know because… Well I didn't want to make the same mistake twice," she told him earnestly.

Kylo thought about what she said.

"Rey has been taking in parts of the dark side of the Force. She probably was speaking with it," Kylo said.

"The dark side of the Force doesn't have a voice. Not one that fills your head with negativity and lies," she said, she came to grab Kylo's arm so that he couldn't walk away from her. "When I touched Rey, I could feel this inky blackness all over her. It was suffocating her Kylo. Her light felt like it was dying," she explained.

Kylo flinched.

"I just talked to Rey before we came here. She said she wanted to try a little longer. I took away some of the darkness from her just to be safe, though. I know she was having a hard time with it but Snoke is dead, so we don't have to worry about that," Kylo explained.

"How do you know it's not Zoroyais messing with her head? He was able to get into your head, is it such a stretch that it might be him talking to her," Leia asked.

Kylo flinched. He hadn't thought about that. Rey's light should have been strong enough to keep her mind from being invaded by the likes of that Sith Lord, right? He glanced at Rey who looked awkward and uncomfortable surround by the people she'd chosen over him at one point. That was not his Rey.

Maybe he needed to delve into her psyche just to make sure she was truly alone in her head. Kylo shook his head, he couldn't invade her privacy like that. Rey would tell him if she thought Zoroyais was in her head.

"I'll talk to her again to make sure but if anyone could keep that bastard out of their head it's my SunRey," Kylo said.

Leia nodded dejectedly.

"I hope you're right, son. It'd be a shame to lose her to the dark side."

Kylo hated the haunted look in his mother's eyes. He knew it was from memories of losing him all those years ago. He wanted to reassure her that she wouldn't lose another child, but he knew he couldn't do that. With them being engaged in a war such as this, there was no way they'd make it to the end without losses. More of her people, more of her children would die. She could take more losses because she had more people to lose. Kylo on the other hand only had a select few he truly cared about.

"I will do my best to prevent you from losing any more of the people you care about. Once we locate the other Knights of Ren, I would like our unit to be assigned the front lines of the Resistance. That way your people are protected," Kylo said.

If he and his companions died, it would be alright because she'd already mourned his loss long ago. He would rather she not lose any of the children she'd taken into her heart as his replacement. He didn't think she could handle it.

He turned and started to go inside but Leia grabbed him.

She threw her arms around him as though she had read his thoughts.

"You are my baby boy. And your people are my people as long as we are fighting for the same side. I couldn't bear to lose any of you. Especially you," she said firmly. "I love you, son. No matter what you call yourself, no matter what happened in the past."

Kylo's chest felt tight as he stayed his mother's arms. Distantly he wished his father were here with them. It had been so long since his parents had held him tightly like this. Ben Solo was beaming in the core of Kylo Ren's being. This was all the younger version of himself had wanted for so long and it made him feel so good.

"Now let's go see what Bell and Nik have found," Leia said, pulling back to stare up at her only child.

Kylo nodded and together they made their way into the hall.

"Finally, our other two generals are here so we can start. I have good news and I have bad news," Bell said as he turned on a holotable in the middle of the room.

A map of the room appeared for a second before it changed to show a woman with pink skin.

"The good news," Kylo asked.

"We found Kaithur Ren. And she's not far from here," Nik said with a small smile.

Nik and Kai has been best friends even before Bell became friends with Kylo.

Kylo wondered if she missed the free spirited female as much as Kylo had missed Bell and Nik.

"And the bad news," Rey asked.

Kylo couldn't help but notice how fidgety Rey was. She couldn't seem to sit still. Every few seconds she would shift in her chair, mess with her hair or bite on her painfully short fingernails. If he didn't know any better, he would have thought she was on some kind of narcotic.

"She's on Nar Shaddaa," Nik said.

Everyone in the room became tense except Rey.

She looked around at the others and then shot Kylo a confused look.

Why do they all look like Bell just said Kaithur was on Zoroyais' ship or something? Can't we just hop over to the moon and grab her, Rey asked him directly in his head.

Nar Shaddaa is a notorious hub of pirates, mercenaries, bounty hunters and Hutt warlords. It's one of the most dangerous places in the galaxy for members of the Resistance. It's probably even worse now than it was when Skywalker was there, Kylo explained to Rey.

"Even though the Knights of Rey aren't that widely known, Zer-o and I made a name for ourselves and House Benelux taking down the exact type of people who spend time on that moon," Cade said before Essie could volunteer them. "If this is a mission you want to send us on, the two of us probably shouldn't leave the Starfall."

Zer-o nodded in agreement and Essie looked disappointed but also a hopeful.

"Nik and I are welcome there as Knights of Ren, especially since we didn't blow our covers as Embers to Zoroyais' man," Bell said to Kylo with a smirk but Kylo just glowered at him.

"I'm still not happy that you didn't tell me beforehand, but I can live with it if you can get Kaithur to join us," Kylo said in a low tone. "When can they leave," Kylo asked looking to his mother.

Leia looked to Connix and Poe who both typed things into data pads.

"We have enough fuel for them to get there and get back but nothing extra," Poe said.

"We're still waiting to hear back from allies to see if we can even get more fuel," Connix said, shaking her blonde head. "If we don't get more, when the Neo Order comes for us next, we won't even be able to flee," she said worriedly.

The room fell into an uncomfortable silence.

"Things will work themselves out. I suppose you should leave right away," Leia said.

"I hate to be the one to point out the obvious but is it really wise to send 8 of our 10 Force Wielders off planet right now," Finn asked, and Rose nodded in support.

Rey and Kylo looked at Finn at the same time.

"I believe the two of us can combat any force Zoroyais throws at us," Kylo said with confidence.

"I have a bad feeling about this," Finn said standing and crossing his arms over his chest, "but you're gonna do whatever you wanna do, anyway."

"We need her, Finn. We need strength and a show of force," Rey said. "And before you say we'll be weak by sending the Knights away, they'll only going a few planets away. That's when they'll need to be at their strongest since we can't go with them," she went on. "We need this win."

Everyone in the room nodded in agreement. They did need a win. They needed it now.

"Alright. You 8 have your mission. Get prepared you leave first morning's light," Kylo said.

The 8 Force sensitives nodded and left the hall going to gather everything they would need to blend in on Nar Shaddaa.

Kylo looked at Rey, "Are you ready to go spar?"

She nodded.

"If you need us, we'll be sparing out in the practice field on the other side of the farms," Kylo told the others and then got to his feet before holding his hand out to Rey.

When she took his hand, Kylo thought he could feel something lurking in the rear of her consciousness. He went to search for it and was relieved when he got no resistance from Rey. He searched and searched but came up with nothing. Kylo didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

…

Rey

The practice field was almost too beautiful to ruin with combat but Kylo was worried that she was going to get rusty from going weeks without training. Meditation was good for keeping the connection to the Force, but the body needed to be worked as well. So, there they were, practice sabers out, in their workout clothes, with Kylo putting her through paces.

Rey had sweat running down her face, neck and back. Kylo wasn't going easy on her and usually she wouldn't be upset about it but today her darkness was riding her hard.

Why did you let him in your head? He just wants to spy on you. To make sure you aren't thinking lusty thoughts about anyone but him. Or to make sure that you aren't plotting to overthrow him as the real leader of your little Gray Ember Order, Dark Rey said with a frown on her ghostly face. You should show him just how powerful you are, she said.

Rey blocked two heavy down swings and a quick sideswipe that would have cut someone lesser in half. Kylo came forward, pressing the attack and Rey was barely able to fend him off with her darkness riding her so hard. She dodged under an angled upward cut and brough her own light saber out with a quick stab at Kylo's left calf.

He's toying with you like your nothing. You might as well be his little bed slave. Just get on your back and spread your legs while he does all of the important things, Dark Rey said causing Rey to completely falter in her steps.

Kylo took the opportunity to knock Rey off balance with the Force and then bring his practice saber down to just above Rey's throat.

"Your focus is off and it's showing very plainly," Kylo said in a hard tone. "You can do better than this," he said.

Listen to how he talks to you, like you're some kind of child. Proving just how much stronger he is than you, the darkness said.

He's pushing me just as hard as the other students since he's amped up the training. I would feel worse if he was still going easy on me, Rey said back.

Kylo came at her again with his practice saber, he swung at her left hand on the handle of her double bladed practice saber. The pain that bloomed in her hand made tears spring into her eyes as she let go with a yelp. Rey spun away from Kylo trying to strike back with only one hand on the staff. He easily deflected the weak swing and whacked her again. This time on her butt.

"Ouch! Kylo that hurt," Rey cried dropping the practice saber to the ground so she could rub the tender flesh of her butt with the hand that didn't hurt.

Rey knew she would be bruised on both places before long.

Kylo lowered his practice saber and frowned at Rey. As he looked her over Rey couldn't help feeling nervous. He reached into her mind trying to find what had her so distracted.

In a panic, Rey hurriedly threw up the vision that she'd had of Zoroyais turning into different faces of the past including her father and herself. Her darkness retreated to its own hiding place in her mind. It seemed as though being discovered by Kylo was the only thing that it truly seemed to fear. And while that scared her, it also gave her an out for if she decided that she could not truly integrate the smothering darkness into her being. All she had to do was reveal it to him and she had a feeling it would go away.

"This again," Kylo muttered sounding frustrated. "Rey, you can't let yourself be crippled by fear. You are not evil. The dark side likes to mess with your head to make you afraid, to make you feel alone and weak. I know. I went through it remember," he urged her. "You are so much stronger than I was at the time, so I know you have what it takes to knock the darkness back until you need it's power to fight Zoroyais," he proclaimed.

Rey let out a sigh of relief as he bought her mental lie and retreated from her mind. As soon as he was gone the darkness was back, barely giving Rey time to respond to Kylo without it's dark influence.

"I know but seeing myself under that helmet has me shaken, Kylo. If someone as strong as you and Anakin Skywalker could fall to the dark side, what chance does a nobody like me stand," she asked.

As Rey let out a defeated sigh, Kylo dropped his practice saber and came over to throw his arms around her. He tilted her face up to his and then kissed her slowly.

"Because unlike my grandfather, our love is not tainted by obsession. And unlike me you aren't alone in this struggle. We are all here to help you. Your friends, our students, my mother and especially me; we are all here to help keep you in the light. If the darkness is too much of a burden for you and the rest of your Knights, my knights and I will act as your counterbalance. Always," Kylo told her once he'd broken the kiss.

He's lying to you! He just wants to show you just how weak you are! He could handle the darkness, but you can't, so he'll take it for you! Who does he think you are? Some weakling who can't even defend herself. You need to show him Rey. Show him how strong we are. Show him that we could break him should we chose to, the darkness screamed at her, blocking Rey from continuing to feel the reassurance in Kylo's words.

Pain exploded inside Rey's skull as the darkness screamed at her. It was as though the words the darkness was spouting were mini light sabers being plugged into Rey's brain with every word the darkness spoke.

No, Rey groaned in her head. I will not hurt him. I love him, Rey cried in anguish.

"Rey," Kylo sounded confused as he touched her arm.

Rey jerked away from him. Her hands flew to her head. She let out a small shrill scream as the pain cut through her again.

Do it Rey! Show him how well you have adapted to the dark side. Show him the pain he was so willing to inflict on others before you infected him with your light. Show him what has come from him infecting you with his darkness.

No! I can't, Rey screamed back. It would kill something in me to hurt Kylo now.

Not even a year ago you didn't want to just hurt him, you wanted him dead. Where did that anger go? This is the same man who murdered countless innocents including his own father, tortured Poe, and tried to kidnap you! You need to be the one who makes him pay!

"Rey what's going on," Kylo asked.

He sounded so scared that Rey had to look up at him despite the pain. The concern in his eyes making Rey feel even worse about what was running through her head. She blinked away tears as she tried to fight the darkness off.

She felt Kylo pressing against her mind, trying to get through to her that way since she didn't seem to be able to hear him.

Rey you have let me in sweetheart, so I can help you, Kylo's voice sounded so sweet in her head.

To draw you in. To make you forget all of the terrible things he's done, the darkness told her.

That's not true, Rey replied.

Dark Rey began walking circles around Kylo as he stared at Rey with anguish in his lovely brown eyes. She sneered evilly at him as she continued to bring up everything Kylo had done under Snoke's command. The Darkness suddenly had a red double bladed light saber in her hand.

Kylo was about to come over to her but stopped as he saw the look of horror on her face.

If you won't take care of this. I will, Dark Rey said bring the red crackling blade up to strike a mortal blow.

"NO," Rey screamed out loud.

More confusion entered Kylo's expression. Especially when Rey held her hand out and hit him with a blast of Force energy. To her horror, Kylo taken by complete surprise went flying into a nearby tree with a loud crack. The tree split behind him, falling with a whack as the trunk hit the ground. Rey felt the burning pain coming to her from his open end of the bond and together they cried out.

Kylo struggled to get to his feet as he called out for her, "Rey!"

"I'm so sorry, Kylo," she called and then turned and ran.

She ran and ran, though not toward the base. She ran deeper into the jungle away from everyone else. She didn't know what to do. What could she even say to Kylo or anyone else? She was losing her mind; she had to be. Why else would be seeing the dark version of herself poised to kill the person she loved more than anything else in the world?

Distantly through the bond she could feel Kylo calling for her. She closed the bond off as tightly as she could and hid her presence in the Force from everyone. She found a small cave and quickly climbed inside.

Rey sat in the dark shaking and crying. She didn't know how long she sat there totally alone in the damp coolness of the cave but after a while her horrible wracking sobs had turned to soft whimpers. She thought about going back. She really needed to know what had happened to Kylo after she'd run off.

Stupid girl, why didn't you finish him, the darkness spat at Rey. You had him right where we wanted him.

"I don't want to hurt Kylo. I won't do it. Anything but that," the last but was said in a hoarse whisper.

Anything, the darkness asked, she didn't sound mad anymore, now curious.

"Anything to help bring balance to the Force," Rey said, nodding.

That is good Rey, very good, her darkness said. I know you can do it, despite what Kylo Ren thinks. I know you can handle the dark side and all that comes with it. We just have to show the others.

Rey nodded. She could do this. For Kylo, The Resistance and the galaxy.