Chapter 8

The Academy

Obedience. Discipline. Loyalty. That was what was drilled into the minds of all recruits. Parents often sent their troubled children to the New Republic Academies as a means to correct their child's undesirable behavior. They put all their hope in an institution that they believed could shape their children into that of a proper galactic citizen.

To the outside, the New Republic Academy was a trusted institution that tested and trained aspiring soldiers and pilots of the New Republic. Upon graduation, officers were enlisted as lieutenants and given their first assignment. They were able to rejoin society, and the lucky ones were able to return to their lives at home. For most recruits, that was what was expected. Unfortunately, not everyone had that luxury, for there was a serpent hiding in plain sight within the weeds.

Deep within the Academy, a growing movement threatened to shake the very core of the New Republic. The First Order worked hidden under the disguise of the New Republic Academies. They took students who wouldn't be missed by their families and sent them for training at the command of the First Order.

Students that were selected went through the most gruesome training that far exceeded that of anything taught in the academy. They were pushed to both their physical and mental limits and those that thrived under such strict trainings were recruited into their upper ranks.

Amara had seen the aftermath of what these academies put their recruits through first hand. Every day she stood by and watched as men and women were pushed until they collapsed from their own physical and mental exhaustion.

Whenever they broke down, she would stand in silence and watch as those deemed too weak were carried and taken to be reconditioned. After reconditioning they were thrown out to the field to start over. Day by day she watched as the recruits changed and morphed into the most mindless and brutal soldiers she had ever seen.

S was put through similar training. She was trained in various combat techniques and was taught how to withstand torture. She was held to a cut above the rest due to her status within the order.

She was not a child thrown away. She had been born in her position of power and was being trained to take her place in the highest ranks. When she was under the First Order's eye she was the model student. Admiral Sloane would point to her at assemblies and would use her as an example of the future of the Republic.

Amara always stood there stoically, her eyes focused ahead as the leaders of the First Order indoctrinated their ideals. She kept her silence and her fortitude up until the moment she closed the door to her room. When the door locked into place, Amara would drop to her knees and scream.

And always she would be interrupted by a tentative knock on her door.

She already knew who was behind the door when she opened it just enough to let them inside. As he walked past her into her room, she looked around the hall. When she didn't see anyone, she closed the door and threw the lock. Without waiting for an invitation, she went into his open arms and buried her head in his chest.

She took comfort in the feel of his warm hands tenderly caressing her hair.

"I don't how much longer I can do this," she said quietly against his chest.

He remained silent as his hand continued to smooth her hair. The gesture always soothed her nerves. She could feel him twirling the curly strands around his slender fingers.

He never said anything to her in those moments. He knew that all she wanted was a space to vent, a confidant that would let her pour all her burdens on and just absorb the pain.

But today she was done. She couldn't stand around silently anymore. She pulled back enough to look up into his blue eyes, eyes that mirrored a similar pain to her own.

He had grown up in the same world as her. He grew up with an ambitious family that wanted nothing more than to gain as much power as possible. They were both being molded in the image of the First Order.

"Let's go. You and me. Let's escape this place."

He raised his hand and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "You know we can't," he said softly.

She shook her head. "But that's just it. We can."

He pulled away and took a step back from her. He ran his hand through his red hair, hair that mirrored that of his father. She knew better than to bring up any similarities that he shared with the man. To say that he had a bad relationship with his father was an understatement.

While Amara routinely would get praise for her accomplishments, he received no praise and was treated like any other recruit. Except, unlike the recruits, he was held to an impossibly high standard that not even the best soldier could rise to.

When he underperformed, he was disgrace, and when he performed magnificently, he was told that he still had room for improvement. Although he never said the words out loud, Amara knew that he hated his father.

Amara watched as he walked away from her, his head shaking back and forth. "And just where would we go?" He asked in a flippant tone.

She wasn't surprised at his response. Often, she would talk about running away, and every time she fell short of actually following through. But what he didn't know was that this time was different.

This time she had a plan.

"We can go anywhere we want to." She turned and went to her bed. She pulled back the carefully made bedsheets and exposed her mattress. She ran her hand along the seam of the mattress before her fingers reached past a slit that was carefully hidden. She reached her hand inside and pulled out a small wooden box.

He walked towards her slowly and eyed the box in her hands, his brow furrowed as his mind worked what she was about to show him. She cupped the box in between them and slowly opened the lid. "I have been saving credits. I don't have a lot, but I have enough to get us passage off Hosinian Prime."

He eyed the box. He didn't reach out to touch it but instead appeared to examine the contents. After a moment he finally spoke, his voice just barely above a whisper. "You're really serious about this?"

She nodded and she closed the box. She walked back to her bed and quickly put the box back its hiding place in her mattress. She pulled the covers back and remade her bed to the standards that she was taught, with the corners perfectly folded and not a wrinkle in sight. When the bed was made she sat down on the edge of the bed and put her head in her hands and took a deep breath.

"Being here is killing me. I cannot stand by while the First Order is spewing these poisonous philosophies. I refuse to be the poster child for this organization. Not anymore."

Amara stood and walked towards him. He continued to stare at where she put the box away, his gaze not meeting hers.

She stopped and stood in front of him. She raised her hands and placed them gently on the sides of his face, turning his head so that he was looking down at her. He was so much taller than her, the top of her head barely reaching the bottom of his chin. She craned her head back so she could look into his blue eyes, which were now clouded.

"I also cannot stand by and watch what they're doing to you. They're hurting you, just like they're hurting me. I want you to come with me. I can't leave without you." She reached down and took his hands in hers.

His eyes continued to look down at her. His eyes seemed to search hers for an answer to some question he was asking but she was unable to hear. After some time he reached up and ran his hands through his hair once more, his fingers pulling on the ends of his hair. "Amara—I—I don't—"

She pulled him towards her, and she wrapped her arms around him tightly. "Please. Please come with me. I refuse to leave without you. We don't have to grow in their mold. We can be just you and me. We can escape. We can just be two people who love each other."

He squeezed her tightly and rested his chin on her head. They stood there molded together for what seemed like and endless amount of time. When she was in his arms time slowed and for the first time in her life she did not feel alone. She was with someone who shared her pain and understood her. She was grateful to have him in her life and she refused to leave him.

After a long reflection he spoke quietly. "When would we leave?"

Amara let out a heavy sigh as her body started to tense with anticipation. He was considering her idea. The picture of their life together began to form and become clearer in her mind.

"There is a transport supply ship leaving tomorrow night. If we move quickly, we can get on it. The captain is with the resistance and he says that if we want safe passage all we have to do is find him. I've already spoken to him and he says that tomorrow will be his last drop-off before he moves to other routes and someone else will take his place. If we want to leave then tomorrow is our best chance."

He fell silent once more. She closed her eyes and kept her head pressed against his chest. The sound of his heartbeat was the only thing keeping her calm in this situation. He held their future within his hands, and she just hoped that he was willing to take this risk with her. Because without him, she didn't think she had the nerve to do it on her own.

"Alright."

She barely heard him. She turned her head up and looked at him. "You'll do it?"

He nodded. "Tomorrow."

She let out a deep breath in relief before nodding. "Tomorrow," she said softly.

He leaned down and lifted her chin so that her face was angled up towards him. He pressed his lips against her softly. His lips were cold against hers, his kiss timid but methodical. He never went deeper than the surface. It had taken her years before she was able to get him to give her that first kiss. They were each other's first and they were slowly learning what it meant to show love for another person. They both grew up in families that were as cold as they were power hungry. Neither of them knew what it felt like to have any kind of physical comfort, but together they were teaching each other. Her heart fluttered each time he touched her and when he finally gave in to his urges and kissed her, she felt the coldness around her beginning to melt.

His kisses were never what great stories wrote about, but with each kiss she saw more of his walls breaking. He was breaking away from the mold of his father and she was beginning to see the man he was slowly becoming.

Their kisses never lasted long, but she did find that with each kiss was getting longer. After he kissed her he would always pull away and rest his forehead against hers, his eyes closed as he seemed to breathe her in.

With a final goodbye he left her, and she was once again alone in her room.

After locking the door behind him she went to her closet and began to pack a small travel bag. She filled it with a couple changes of clothes and a few other necessities.

She looked at her belongings and felt sadness. Out of everything she had she did not have anything of significant emotional value. There was nothing in her possession that filled her with any wistfulness or longing. She was just a shell with nothing of import within.

She shook her head and continued to pack. She might not have anything of import now, but that was going to change. She was going to leave, and together they were going to start a new life together.

When she went to bed that night she dreamt of new possibilities and of a brighter future. She dreamt of the family she wanted and the life she wanted for herself. For the first time in her life she felt hope.

The following morning, she was awoken by the sound of a knock on her door. She looked at the clock and saw that it was an hour before her alarm was to go off. She was confused and wondered if she had imagined the knock all together.

But then she heard it again.

She stood and quietly walked to her door. When she opened the door a crack, she saw those familiar blue eyes. Lines of worries filled her brow as she looked at him in confusion. "What are you doing here?"

Before he could respond a gloved hand came from behind him rested upon his shoulder. Stepping into view, Admiral Sloane narrowed her deep brown eyes at Amara.

"Amara."

Admiral Rae Sloane was a rare breed. She is one of the very few high-ranking female Imperial Officers. Having to navigate a male dominated world, Rae Sloane could not afford to be soft. She learned early on that being nice did not get you far in a man's world. She worked overtime to become one of the Navy's top officers and she learned to never expect any favors thrown her way. She also had no qualms about using force and harsh measures against anyone who did not work in the favor of the First Order.

"Admiral. I—what do I owe the pleasure?" Her back straightened in alarm. There was absolutely no reason for Sloane to be at her room, especially at this hour.

Admiral Sloane nodded towards her room. "I am requesting access to your room. Please step aside."

Amara looked to the man in front of her for any kind of support, but he was unmoving. His blue eyes were emotionless as he looked past her. After realizing that he wasn't going to show any hint of why he was there with Sloane, Amara spoke cautiously.

"May I ask what for Admiral?"

"Routine search is all. No cause for alarm." She raised her hand and motioned towards two storm troopers who were standing in the hall. The two soldiers, who were previously standing stoically behind her moved in unison towards her room.

Amara stepped to the side as she let them all into her room. The small room quickly felt cramped with everyone standing around. She fell back against the wall, her stomach dropping as the storm troopers moved around her room. After a few minutes of searching her closets, drawers, underneath her mattress, and everywhere else she might hide anything of import, the stormtroopers turned to Admiral Sloan and shook their heads. Their search had returned nothing.

Amara continued to breath easily. She was used to these searches. She had prepared for them. What she wasn't prepared for however, was watching the man she trusted walk towards her bed and pull back the bed sheets.

No.

She felt the blood drain from her face as she watched him skim his fingers along the seam and find the hidden slit.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

She watched in horror as he reached inside, pulled out the small box within and handed it over to Admiral Sloane.

"Excellent work Lieutenant Hux."

"General." He nodded and stood, placing his arms behind his back. His eyes darted towards her momentarily before they stared straight ahead.

"Armitage…you—you sold me out?" Amara spoke in a confused whisper. "How could… why would you do this?"

"He came to me and told me some troubling things about you." Admiral Sloane began. "He was worried. As am I."

"You're not worried about me," Amara spat. "You never have."

Admiral Sloane stood and continued to look at her with a hard stare. "That's is not true Amara."

"Just cut the shit." Amara spat, her anger rising to the surface. "All you care about is your own ambitions. I am just a means to rebuild the empire. There is nothing stopping you from exterminating me like the others who have failed the First Order."

Amara stood tall as she faced off with Admiral Sloane. Her dark eyes mirrored hers in their unwavering gaze. Deep down she wanted to believe that Sloane would not dispose of her like the others. She wanted to believe that she knew who Rae Sloane was, but as Amara grew in age she saw less and less any redeeming traits in the woman. She had learned that she needed to remove these crazy fantasies from her head about who Rae Slone was.

"I am sorry you feel that way Amara but you should know that I've only had your best interests at heart. I want to see you succeed, not as a cadet but as someone who could surpass me one day. You have so much ambition. You could be so much more."

Amara didn't try stopping her laugh. She let it flow out of her and over take her. She laughed even more as Sloane's brow furrowed in irritation. Admiral Sloane did not like being made a fool of, and with Amara laughing, that is exactly what she was looking like.

"You can't keep doing this Amara, and frankly you've left me with not other options. I have no choice but to send you to be reconditioned." She nodded to the two stormtroopers.

Amara's laugh was sucked out of her and panic took over as the two soldiers walked towards her. She backed up in her room as she held out her hands. "No. No. NO! Stop! You can't."

Amara…

The two stormtroopers grabbed her arms, quickly pulled them behind and her expertly bound her hands together with zip restraints. As Amara thrashed, she turned to Armitage and pleaded. "Armie… Please. You can't let them do this."

Amara…

He continued to look ahead. His features unmoving. The only movement was that of his Adam's apple as he swallowed.

"Let me go! Get your hands off me!" Amara screamed as she thrashed against the strong arms holding her. She couldn't believe that this was happening to her.

Amara wake up.

"Please Armitage. Don't let them take me. PLEASE!" She cried as she was pulled past him. She tried to move towards him but was held back. Her cheeks became hot as tears fell down her face. She couldn't believe that he would do this to her. She trusted him.

Come back to me.

His eyes closed as he lowered his head. The tendons in his neck hardened as he clenched his jaw. He wasn't going to say anything. He was just going to let this happen. Sloane moved to stand beside him, her hand rested on his shoulder firmly.

"She will be fine Armitage. You did the right thing."

"You cannot do this," she cried as she continued to pull at her binds. "You will not erase me like the others!" She winced as one of the men holding her jerked her arm backwards. "Ouch, you're hurting me."

At that Armitage finally opened his eyes and turned to her.

Baby... Please.

"I'm sorry Amara. But this will all be over soon," he stated sympathetically.

Amara's heart felt as if it broke in two as she was pulled through the door and down the hall. Her screams echoed down the hallway as she tried desperately to break free. She could feel someone place their hand on her face and she flinched away at the unexpected touch.

"ARMITAGE! ARMITAGE!" She continued to cry for help, but she knew that everyone would remain behind their closed doors. They were either conditioned to not care, or too scared to step out, afraid that they would be the next person reconditioned.

That hand on her face returned and she felt someone begin to shake her shoulder. When she tried to fight the touch, she felt it come back stronger. She heard her name being spoken in her ear, each time louder than the next. She fought back against them each time. She would not be another victim. She would not let them take her away. She was going to get out whatever the cost. She was going to get away. She was—

"AMARA!"

Amara gasped as she opened her eyes. Her body flailed in alarm. She was surprised when she realized that her arms were no longer restrained. Her vision was blurry but in front of her she could make out the form of dark figure, their rough palm lightly resting on her cheek.

She was about to push him away when his thumb brushed past her nose and she smelled that familiar scent of petrol and clove. She blinked harder in order to clear her vision.

"Poe?" she rasped.

His hand moved to the top of her head and he slowly ran his fingers through her hair. "Welcome back. Thought I lost you there for a second."

"Wh—where am I?" Her eyes darted around the room and she saw that she was no longer standing in the hallway but instead in a dark room. She could feel the rough fibers of a wool blanket beneath her. She looked down and saw that she was laying down on a cot. When she tried to sit up her limbs felt wobbly and it felt like her strength was drained from her body.

Poe pushed her back down on the cot. His hand didn't leave her body, but instead began moving slowly up and down her arm. The gesture, while foreign to her, was extremely soothing. "Easy there tuck cat. You got hit with 50 thousand volts of electricity. You might want to take it easy a bit."

"50 thousand? What—"

Immediately she was flooded with memory of the last 24 hours. Being questioned by the Agent Terex, escaping possible torture, sneaking on this ship, hiding in a supply closet, being found by that droid, and then becoming lit up like a Christmas Tree.

She saw a flash of white and orange from behind Poe. She peeked around him and saw the droid in question focus its lens on her. She could see the little droid eyeing her up and down. Her eyebrow raised as she looked at him.

"You pack one hell of a punch I'll give you that one," she said to the droid. She had to give credit where credit was due. Even if it hurt like hell.

Poe laughed as he sat back and looked down at his droid. His hand moved from her arm and immediately Amara felt cold. She wanted him touching her again.

And she hated herself for it.

He smiled as he looked at the droid. "Yeah, Beebee is one special droid." His gaze turned to hers and after a moment the smile left his face.

He leaned forward as he rested his elbows on his knees. His hands clasped together in front of him. His eyes searched hers as he appeared to carefully think of what he was to say next. "You know you put me in a bit of a situation, don't you?"

Amara shook her head fervently as she sat up, ignoring the way her limbs felt like jelly. What the hell did that droid hit me with?

"No, please. I promise I won't be a problem."

Poe continued to stare at her, his gaze unmoving. "Now you see, it seems like we do have a problem. You snuck onto my ship and I don't trust you enough to take you where we are headed."

She turned to face him. "No, look… you can just drop me off at your next stop and I promise you will never see me again."

"And lead whoever is chasing you right to us? I don't think so."

Amara shook her head. "No. No one knows where I am. No one saw me get on to your ship. I was extremely careful."

He continued to study her, his gaze unreadable.

She had no idea what was going on in that head of his. She had no idea if he was going to take her for her word or if he was going to open the hatch and leave her out in space. At that moment, either option sounded fine to her. Her time was running out and she couldn't run forever. There were few options left to her, and she knew that death was still on the table. Eventually this game of roulette would end, and either she would see freedom, or she would be looking down the barrel of a loaded blaster.

"I am only going to ask this one time," he began carefully. "And you better give me the truth. Otherwise BB-8 is going to light you up again." He gestured to the droid behind him.

She looked over at the droid and watched as a little arm fly out from his body, the end glowing with electricity. The droid looked like he meant business.

She gulped as she looked to Poe to hear his question.

His eyes fixed on hers. His gaze studying her every movement. "Who are you to General Armitage Hux?"

Shit.