Chapter 5: Shadow Forest (written from November 24th to November 26th, 2019)

"Are you still mad?" said Rocky.

"What do you think, stupid?"

"Sorry... I guess it has been a while since we last met. How are you doin'?" Dani sighed in response.

"Somewhat okay. The Northerners are nice."

"Do wolves still give you weird looks?"

"Of course, they do. It never ends. It's always like, 'hey, look! Look at it! Look at it!' The world is so cruel. I thought running away would solve my problem but it didn't. You took advantage of me... And I have no idea what part of my brain is allowing me to be nice to you right now, but you're awful. I want you to know that. Nowadays, I just accept wolves pointing their forepaws at me, framing me as a freak, and maybe because of that, I have grown a thicker skin. Maybe because I've given up appeasing the worst the world has to offer, I can stand being next to someone I hate. Surprisingly I can stand being next to you... for now anyway. I'm contemplating whether or not I should slit your throat."

"Will a million sorrys suffice?"

"The only thing you deserve is a million fuck yous."

"Wow. You sure have changed." Rocky had not seen Dani since earlier in the winter. Danielle was once a very shy and timid wolf from his pack. Confidence was never one of her attributes. A wolf's first winter is the most dramatic period in their life. In three moons, they change from pups to adults. Spring hadn't arrived quite yet, but the changes were crystal clear. It was especially dramatic for Dani, for she had been living on her own. Most young wolves exit their parents' den after they graduate school. But Dani left the pack entirely after only a few days in Alpha School. Rocky had actually joined her. He was by her side for the first few weeks in unclaimed territory. Rocky was a different wolf back then. He was reckless and condescending. It wasn't until much later, after he left her and returned to the Western Pack, that he realized that denouncing her in front of their peers broke her heart.

"I admit... you have changed too," said Dani, feeling skeptical. "Maybe that's the secret. I'm sensing a wolf more reflective than what I'm guarding against. But... that still doesn't excuse you. Don't expect me to be won back!"

"I only have one goal in life right now: escape," Rocky replied. "I know I left my pack once with you, but I mean it. I'm never going to look back. I guess in the end you were right about everything about the world. It's a piece of shit."

"We tried to make our own pack. It failed. I've given up. It's too hard. I've just accepted everything."

"I can't just accept this, to live my life knowing I don't belong. I don't know exactly what I'm going to do, but I know exactly what I should do. I know you don't feel like you belong either, but don't worry. I'm not going to ask you to join me. That notion has come and gone. In fact, you would just slow me down."

"Hey! Don't be a prick! I was starting to like the new you!"

"Is that all we exist for, Dani?! To be liked? I figured you more than anybody would understand that wolves who don't belong deserve some immunity from society's expectations. I don't care if I'm liked. Judge me as you want. Hell, leave me to find Shadow Forest myself! I have more Alpha training than you! I could probably find it eventually if I tried; you know that! You don't have to show me the way, so why are you?"

Dani was silent. She didn't reply. As they walked between the trees, she glared at the ground, breathing heavily, appearing to contain herself. "Well?! Why are you?!" Rocky grilled. They came to a stop. "WHY ARE YOU?!"

"We're here, dingus!" she answered, closing her eyes. She gave a deep sigh. "We're here... Just go... please... I beg you..." Rocky looked straight ahead. The forest in front of them radiated darkness. The thick canopy allowed little light to reach the forest floor. Shadows reigned supreme. "Don't even say thank you," Dani added. The light grey wolf hesitantly nodded before slowly entering the area.

Later...

Shadow was sitting in front of his den, butchering a kill on top of a boulder. He was a wolf full of history, none of which he liked discussing. Every square inch of his body's surface had a story to tell. Inside, he was solid and always firm, but his skin was sensitive. The scars were so deep they reached his personality. He was no social butterfly. This wolf that approached him, who seemed to be young and physically perfect, annoyed him. An hour earlier he had just taken in an injured wolf, and it was purely out of the goodness of his heart. He didn't want to be anybody's puppysitter or saint. Remoteness was his element. Had his reputation for being wise compromised his location?

"Whew. Shadow, right?" greeted Rocky, panting. The black-reddish wolf ignored him. "Hello? I see you're sorta' busy with that caribou, but this is important."

"Don't waste my time, Alpha. Importance can be subjective." Shadow refused to look him in the eyes.

"I'm a Beta actually. Alpha School hasn't ended yet."

"Shouldn't you be with your parents then?"

"I don't care about my parents. Fuck them," said Rocky. Shadow then looked at him, deepening his frown. "I need your help."

"You're a lost cause," he replied with contempt.

"I know I am. That's why I'm going to make my own beginning. I hear you have the most knowledge of the lands outside of the Valley. You know a way out."

"I know many ways," the Alpha corrected, "but none are good paths for you. You're a Western no doubt. They are a good pack. Your duty is to them."

"You don't understand! The pack lied to me! My whole life they lied to me!" Rocky stamped his right forepaw. "You're a recluse! You don't understand what it means to be betrayed by something that meant more to you than a family! You don't understand what it means to feel lost..."

"That might be the most untrue statement I've ever heard." Shadow stopped his butchering and finally gave full attention. "I wasn't born with these claw and bite marks. Most of them I didn't earn. I was an orphan destined to die in the coldness of a new moon. I was taken in by a pack leader who sought to make me into the best Alpha he could. His biological son I would frolic with until summer's end. He taught me the love of country and the love of countrywolf. We gave each other courage, happiness, even criticism. But then, the pack leader, my only father... I held him in my arms as I stood in a pool of his intestines... I remember his confused face fading into colorlessness. His biological son's scent... everywhere in the pack leader's cave... He blamed it on me... THEY blamed it on me! He was younger than me... He wanted to rule! I barely escaped with my life. I felt betrayed... I felt lost... unwanted and unloved... Please, young wolf, spare me your baseless claims. You know nothing about me, and you will never know anything. Never... will you have the luxury of experiencing anything close to what I've experienced. Turn back to your original path. Right wrongs instead of leaving them be for others. Don't be a puppy. Be a wolf for damn's sake."

"I'm sorry... but as you've brilliantly clarified, I'm not you. It is because I'm a wolf that I'm willing to step up to leave this hellhole. I've done it once before; I'll do it again. This time, I'm by myself. I'm not bound to anyone. Whether you like it or not, my current path is locked in permafrost, so are you going to help me?"

"I can't help the unhelpable. Find someone else to disturb."

"What about that guy? Can he help?" Shadow looked behind himself. Rocky gestured to the other wolf who was resting in Shadow's den.

"Leave him be," said Shadow. "He's in no condition to help you."

"Huh? What? Someone needs me?" said the other wolf, sleepily.

"Oh, you're awake," Shadow acknowledged. The other wolf came out of the den while dragging his left hind leg that was in a splint. He gave a loud yawn before sitting down next to his caretaker and their future meal. His fur was the exact same color as Rocky's: light grey. Rocky didn't know what to think of the wolf who also had a piece of flexible bark wrapped around his head.

"Some injury," he whispered out of earshot.

"Ooo. Looks delicious," the other wolf commented, looking down at the caribou. He enjoyed its presence briefly. "Who's this?"

"I don't know," Shadow answered apathetically.

"My name is Rocky. I'm a lone wolf."

"Huh. So am I," the other wolf replied.

"I'm looking for a way out of the Valley. Do you know one?"

"Pff, I know thousands."

"Great!" Rocky exclaimed. He glanced at Shadow and smirked. "Whenever you're able, please show me! What's your name?"

"Call me Alabaan."

"Cool!"

As they continued to talk Shadow thought to himself. He wanted to address something that was beginning to consume his mind every second. It was something very unusual that he noticed when he started talking to Rocky, when he first smelled him. Rocky definitely smelled like a Western but, in the distant corners of that smell, Shadow could detect something off, something that normal Western wolves would not have... It wasn't a temporary smell, something that would come from the environment. No, it was a small but significant smell belonging to the actual body... a smell of the North...

Credit: Shadow is an OC created by xXShadowTheWolfXx. I have permission to use his OC, but all rights are reserved for him. Also, I just turned 20, folks. Yay, me.