A/N: For helga-leakadia's May Writing Challenge for my OTPs.

This is sad and hurt my heart.

Rules: 1 fic per day for the month of May, any length, but must include the quote.

Day 11 Prompt: "How are you still standing?"

Pairing: Rick Grimes x Michonne Grimes

Summary: Rick and Michonne are still grieving the loss of Carl

Words: 534

Warnings: Hurt/Comfort; Character Death; Grief

It was one of the hard days. One of the days where all Rick wanted to do was lay down and let the pain envelop him; let it draw the last bit of breath from his shaking body. Everything felt like a haze in the wake of losing Carl, but there was no real time to mourn. At least, not properly.

The battle still raged around them; terror, it seemed, was all they knew. There persisted the threat of death around every corner. New threats and old, reminding him the people he loved were never truly safe. The worry and heartache were like twisting blades most of the time.

There was no time, yet time still passed. And while each day had brought some semblance of healing, there were still hard days amidst it all. Today was one of those hard days: It was Carl's birthday.

The only person who knew how to bring him solace was Michonne. He was always able to draw strength from her, especially when the fight became too much. Though he was tired, he sought her out and found Michonne leaning against the doorjamb watching their daughter while she slept.

She heard him coming as his familiar footfalls sounded against the hardwood floors. She felt the warmth of his body heat close to her, as he leaned in and peered over her shoulder. She stepped out of the way, but he did not enter the bedroom. Instead, he stared into his wife's eyes and let out a heavy sigh.

"Glad to see she's sleepin'," he whispered, low and uneven, as he leaned against the wall. "I'm so tired."

"Then rest," she said, stepping closer and bringing a hand to his face; she cupped his cheek and he melted into her touch.

"I can't," said Rick. "I do feel like I'm gonna collapse, but you can't sleep if you can't find peace. Are you okay?"

"No, not really," said Michonne in earnest. "But I'm still standing."

"How?" asked Rick, as he wrapped a comforting arm about her; he clung to her to balance his own weight so that he would not fall. "How are you still standing? I don't know if I can for much longer."

"He's gone," said Michonne, with tears filling her eyes. "He's gone and sometimes I feel like I can't even breathe. I don't want to keep moving. I just wanna crawl away and curl up into the smallest, tiniest ball and lay there until I die. He's gone and it hurts just like when I lost André. He's gone and it's not fucking fair. He's gone. Carl's gone. But Judith is still here. She's right there, and she needs us. She's the reason I'm still standing. Why I have to. Why you have to, as well Rick. Because Carl might be gone, but Judith is still here."

She watched as the tears fell from Rick's eyes, before she leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his brow.

"It'll get easier," she whispered. "I promise it will. Now let's go lie down."

"I love you," said Rick, as he held her close.

They shared a chaste kiss before Michonne replied, "I love you, too."