Chapter9: Fall

A/N: Hi guys! I'm so sorry I took so long to update! Tuesday didn't work out this week. But for that this one is a bit longer. This is my favourite chapter, so I can't wait to hear what you guys have to say. Thank you for each review and message, it means so much to me. I love you guys, seriously.

We were built to fall apart
And fall back together (back together)

(Taylor Swift – Out of the woods)

When I opened my eyes I was confused by the brightness. Was I dead? Where was Sharleen?

The smell came to me first. Disinfectant. And then there were the sounds. The dripping of the IV. The beeping of the machines.

I was in hospital.

"Dr. Quinzel?" It was a male nurse. "How are you feeling?"

I looked up at him with a glare. It was the second time in two days that I had been attacked in my own home. Obviously I felt like shit. What an idiot!

"Would you like something to eat?"

"No." My voice was hoarse. "Water."

He handed me a cup and I emptied it in one go. Still feeling fuzzy I was sure I misheard when he said:

"The psychologist will be here in a moment. Is that alright?"

"The what?" I shook my head and my vision swam before my eyes. That hadn't been my best idea.

"The psychologist." He repeated as if this was a completely normal term.

For a moment we looked at each other and then I asked again:

"The what?"

The nurse closed his eyes for a moment and then looked at me with just a hint of annoyance. But he got a grip on himself and patiently explained:

"Dr. Quinzel. You tried to commit suicide. You need to see someone about this."

"I...what?" I sighed confused. Where was the police? I had been attacked! Didn't they get that?! But then again, the police in this town was corrupt. Talking to them would do me no good. Honestly maybe speaking to a psychologist wasn't such a bad idea.

"He says he knows you. You were his patient before."

I shook my head. "I've never been to a psychologist."

The male nurse looked at me in a way that made anger flare up inside of me. He looked at me as if I was crazy. As if I was out of my mind, because I couldn't remember whether or not I'd been a patient of psychiatric care before!

"He'll be here any moment." The nurse promised and squeezed my arm tenderly. As if I needed comfort.

Idiot.

When I was alone I fell back into my pillow with a loud sigh. Great. I had no idea how I was supposed to get out of this situation again. How on earth had I survived in the first place? And who was the psychologist who said he knew me? Could I trust him? So far I hadn't been able to trust anyone here.

Except for the Joker ironically enough. Our conversation came back to me and I was overwhelmed with a sudden longing of him visiting me. I wanted someone here I could trust.

There was a knock on the door and I sat up.

"Yes?" I was surprised by how weak my voice sounded. After everything it was time for me to grow strong, wasn't it? Couldn't I become fearless after everything that had been done to me? How had I not been pushed over the edge yet?

The door was pushed open and a man I knew all to well came inside. His blue eyes were unmistakeble of course. But he had coloured his green hair black and hadn't gelled it back completely. Honestly, it looked like he had more hair. And he was wearing full clothing: A blue shirt to bring out his eyes and dark trousers and a white doctors gown. He wasn't showing of his tattoos and the damaged on his forehead had vanished too. His face wasn't unnaturally pale anymore. He must have a ton of make-up on his face.

"Good morning, Dr. Quinzel." He smiled revealing not metallic, but perfect white teeth. "My name is Dr. Jahasapeemapetilonda but you can just call me Dr. J."

I was speechless.

"Well. How are you today?"

I shook my head dumbfounded. "How did you make your teeth so white?"

He ignored my question and sat down on the chair beside my bed. He had a clipboard with him and everything. And a staff card...with a picture!

"Ok, how did you get that ridiculous name on there?!"

Again he ignored me. "How are you feeling today, Dr.?"

"Are you going to answer any of my questions?"

"Is it ok, if I call you Harley?" He asked now and amusement shone in his eyes and I found myself blushing as I remembered the first time he had asked me this question. "It helps me to connect with my patients better, if I can talk to them on a firstname basis."

Alright. If he was going to stick to this role then I supposed I had no other choice, but to go along with it.

"Yes, Dr. J that's fine."

If he was happy about my decision to go along or not I couldn't really tell, because he took notes on his clipboard.

"So." Dr. J said in all earnesty. "Let's talk about last night. I heard you had an argument with your boyfriend, is that correct?"

My heart jumped in my chest at that word and kept my gaze locked with his. Boyfriend?

"I'm not sure." I admitted. "We haven't really defined our relationship."

"But there was an argument?"

"Yes." I said clearly. "It was pretty intense."

"How so?" He leaned forward and the only thing missing from his outfit were glasses he could push up his nose to feign interest.

"Well, he hit me."

"I'm sure you deserved it." He said so matter-of-factly and that caused me to laugh, because this entire situation was so absurd. "How did you feel after this argument, Harley?"

All the amusement had faded from me now, as I answered: "Like I was lost. And sad."

For a brief second a silent gaze passed between us and I wondered if he had felt the same way. But my senses came to me quickly and I highly doubted it. "I felt like I had missed a once-in-a-life-time-chance and would never find my way back."

"And what happened then?" He asked.

Finally I understood what was going on.

"You think I tried to kill myself?" I asked. Seriously? Yes, I had been desperate and upset, but not that upset...

"Harley, I will be the one asking questions. Now, tell me. Have you ever tried to commit suicide before?"

We looked at each other and I felt lost in his blue eyes. This was his way of giving me a second chance. And he was the only person in this entire messed up world I felt like I could trust. So I decided to be honest.

"Yes."

"How old were you?" I couldn't read his reaction. His Poker Face was absolutely flawless, but I wanted to believe he was surprised.

"I was 16."

"Why did you do it?"

"Because my sister had killed herself and I wanted to be with her." As I said these words I began to feel ill. Those women...they had known too much about me.

Dr. J couldn't have known what I was thinking, but he asked the right question: "How did you try to commit suicide back then Harley?"

"I cut my wrists." Just like they had.

"And last night..." He continued. "You wanted to be with someone as well?"

"With you." I admitted. "But I didn't try to commit suicide."

He leaned forward now obviously intrigued. "So it was just a cry for help then?" The amusment shone in his eyes, but I had lost my interest in this game of his. These women had attacked me. Whoever they were they had wanted me dead.

"No. I didn't try to kill myself at all. I was attacked." I explained. "By a group of women."

Finally I got him to drop his doctor act, as his mouth dropped open in surprise and he then asked: "Are you shitting me right now, Harley?"

I shook my head hectically. "I swear that's what happened, Puddin'. Th-" I stopped midsentence as the memories of my sweet kitten came back to me.

"What?" He asked annoyed that I hadn't continued.

"They killed her." I whispered and tears burned in my eyes. "They killed my Puddin'."

Mr. J cocked his head to the side and then looked up at my IV. "What are you on?"

I rolled my eyes and wiped away the tears that had escaped my eyes. "My kitten was called Puddin and the women that attacked me killed her." Her loud wails still echoed in my ears and I didn't even try to stop my tears this time.

I wasn't sure what I had expected, whether he felt pity for a little cat, but I hadn't expected him to be offended:

"You named me after your cat?!"

"I gave you the nickname of my pet which meant a lot to me." I said clearly and didn't add that he had no right to complain, if he didn't tell me his real name. "Anyway. The women were already in my apartment, when I came home. There were five of them, they cut open my wrists."

"Were they wearing masks?"

My heart stopped in my chest as I drew in a loud breath. But what had I expected? He was The Joker for crying out loud! I couldn't speak, as stared at him wide-eyed. Mr. J interpreted my silence correctly, as he snapped in an annoyed tone:

"I didn't send them after you, Harley!"

I closed my eyes in relief for a minute. He hadn't done this to me. He was here now. This could work.

"Those were the bitches that shot me." He muttered, trying to make sense of all of this. "I hadn't taken care of that yet."

I shivered under the hospital covers. "Do you think they've been watching us?"

"Maybe." He finally put the stupid clipboard aside and then shook his head. "We're not...how would they even know that you were the way to get to me?"

I tried to hide my smile. I was the way to get to him! While one part of me was ready to giggle with glee and happiness, the other was terrified.

"Maybe they're not related." I said. "Maybe they have something to do with Dr. Turner...oh no!" I shot up in bed. "I completely forgot about him! I can't be in the same hospital as him! You can get me out, right?" I started to pull at my IV and he was at my side in seconds, holding my hands steady.

"Relax, Baby. He's not here. They sent him away." I sighed at the relief of these news and at the soft touch of his hands on mine.

"But you can get me out?" I asked hopefully.

"That was the plan..." He brushed away some stray hairs from my face. "But I think you're safest here, honestly Honey that apartment of yours is a death-trap."

His insult to my housing and the fact that he called me Honey made me laugh.

"So what does the Doctor recommend?"

"Well..." He flipped himself onto the bed, on top of me, with one leg on each side of my body. "In my expert opinion I would recommend a lot of sex."

I had to giggle underneath him. "Really?"

"Yes absolutely. And you should definiteily stop wearing clothes. They are unhealthy for you, just...leave them off."

I laughed again and he pressed his lips against mine eagerly. I sighed and ran my hand through his hair, as he began making purring sounds. I didn't care that anybody could walk in at any moment. I never wanted to stop kissing him, I never wanted to be apart from him again.

But Mr. J stopped kissing me and straightened up, climbing of the bed again.

"I need to call Johnny, I left him alone with your friend and I'm not sure he can handle her." He frowned. "She talks a lot."

"You mean Quinn?" I asked surprised. "How do you know her?"

"She came to me." He explained in a bored tone, as if I should have caught on by now. "She told me you tried to kill yourself and that I should come and see you."

At his words a warmth spread from my stomach up to my chest. "And you came." There was a silence before I whispered. "Are we going to try this? Even if I didn't try to kill myself because of you?" I paused and then added: "Even if I'm a surgeon?"

Mr. J leaned forward and peered into my eyes. I wasn't sure what he was seeing, but I was seeing this: I had held a gun against his head, he had lied about Dr. Turners death, I had been willing to give up everything for him and he had dismissed me just to hurt me. He had pretended to have girlfriends to upset me.

And yet all I wanted was him.

He was insane, actually clinically insane and a murderer and ruthless.

And I was falling in love with him.

My Puddin' leaned in once more and pressed his lips against mine in a gentle, almost careful manner and I knew he had seen the same things I had.

We were both falling in love with each other.

"Quinn said your place was a mess."

I blushed. "I kind of had a tantrum after I found out Dr. Turner was still alive."

A grin spread on his face. "Interesting."

"Could you tell your boys to clean it up?"

"They're already on it." He promised. "I'll stop by there on my way home. Do you need anything?"

I shook my head and then whispered: "Would you bury Puddin'? And not just throw her away?"

The struggle was readable in his eyes. He was The Joker, he wasn't going to go along and plan a kittens funeral. But I was the way to get to him.

"I'll have Johnny do it."

"She tried to save me." I whispered and was suddenly overwhelmed by how tired I was. "She tried to attack them and they killed her."

Mr. J leaned down and kissed my head gently. "I'll come by later again. Don't tell anyone that you were attacked. We don't want the police getting involved."

"The police!" I shot up, wide awake and managed to whack my head against his.

"Ow!" He snapped. "Seriously, Harley what on earth are you on?!"

Trust me. You do not want to press any charges – Doctor. Susanne and I are very good friends. We've been friends since high school and our husbands play golf together.

"I went to the police the day Dr. Turner attacked me and there was a police woman and she sent me away she said she was friends with the Turners and that I shouldn't press charges and she must have been one of them!" I was stumbling over my words, trying to get them out as quickly as possible.

"You told her he tried to rape you and she sent you away?"

I held back my comment that he had done the same thing and explained: "No it was before when it was only harrassment."

"What's her name?" He asked coldly.

"I don't know." I sighed and rubbed my forehead. "She had red hair."

"I'll find her." Mr. J promised. "You stay here and rest, ok? I'll see you later."

I didn't want him to go. I didn't want to be alone. It must have been written all over my face, because he leaned down and kissed me deeply.

"I'll be back Harley, I promise." He whispered.

"Do you really think it's safe here?" I whined. "Can't you have me discharged instead?"

"I'll have to take care of the bitches first. But Dr. Jahasapeemapetilonda will make sure you get the best treatment."

"How long did you need to learn that name off by heart?"

"It's my name Harley, I didn't need to learn it." He said back in his role.

"How did you come up with it? And how did you get people to take it seriously?"

Now he went to the door. "I'll send Quinn to you and I'll be back, when I have news about those cunts."

I leaned back in my pillows and when I quietly said: "Bye Puddin'" he stopped for a moment and then left the room. Although we had said so many things in-between the lines and directly I knew it was these two words and this nickname that made him see how serious I was about us.

There was no turning back.

3rd. Person POV

Johnny had a bad headache. He wasn't sure how he felt about the females joining him and his boss. That Quinn talked to much. She couldn't stay. Harleen on the other hand wasn't such an annoyance for him. He liked her.

The Joker was back to his usual appearance again and had left the role of the doctor behind him. He hadn't seen his boss this angry in a long time. He was good at hiding it, but Johnny was better at reading him.

The exasperated sighs that escaped his lips every now and then. The curling of his fists and narrowing of his eyes.

It hadn't been hard to find the redheaded police woman. Her name was Yvette Carrow and she was married to Harold Carrow. Both were 32 and they had no children. After burying the stupid cat he'd taken two of the younger boys to Harolds house. They were in luck, he was a IT consultant who worked from home. He'd explained the situation to the newbies and let them beat the guy half to death. He himself had filmed the violence with a sense of...pride or something of the other. These guys got the deal, they just did the job. It was nice to see new people he and the boss could rely on.

But talking to Yvette was a too important job. It was something the Joker only trusted him with.

"Did you bury the cat?" His boss asked now from the drivers seat.

"Yes boss."

"I hate cats."

Johnny smiled. "I know."

"I'm glad it's dead." He paused and then added in a surprised tone: "Harley was pretty upset though."

Johnny tried to hide his smile. The Joker and human emotions were always fun to watch. He was like a child trying to understand advanced mathematical processes. He was fascinated by them and yet couldn't quite understand the concept.

They stopped the car at the police station and waited. The husband was calling her right now, begging her to come home that something had happened. They would just wait for her to come rushing out and then strike.

Right on time the door opened and the redhead came hurrying down the stairs in a nervous stance. The Joker smiled joylessly and nodded at Johnny, who got out of the car and had the police officer in a locked grip and a gun at her head in seconds.

"Let go of me!" She struggled in the backseat and the Joker slammed down on the gaspedal, so the car sprung forward.

There was some screaming and kicking until Johnny rammed a needle in her arm and the officer went down with a sigh. The Joker turned the music up and began whistling to the music as he drove home.

Yvette Carrow had no idea, but starting now her life was going to be very different.

Harley POV

"Johnny is so handsome! And I really think we connected..." Quinn grinned and reached for my pudding. "You're not eating this are you?"

I shook my head and let her have it. She had come by about an hour ago and had brought me my toothbrush, some clothes, shampoo and because she was Quinn she had also brought some chocolate.

"Do you think Johnny, the Joker, you and I could go on a double date sometime?"

"I don't know." I muttered, rubbing my head. I still felt so tired.

"Are you ok?" Quinn asked immediately going into a surgeon-mode and coming towards me with her small light. But I wasn't sure what exactly she wanted to check, it wasn't like I'd had brain surgery.

"I'm tired."

"Well you lost a lot of blood." She shifted uncomfortably. We hadn't actually spoken about what had happened and I agreed with Mr. J. I didn't want to put Quinn in any danger or myself. It was better to keep it quiet.

"I know why you did it Harleen." She said in a surprisingly serious tone.

"You do?"

She nodded. "The night we went out and someone slipped you a roofie...that really upset you didn't it?"

That lie had really come in handy, I hadn't expected it to.

"Yeah, I...I don't know what happened that night and then after arguing with Mr. J I just...I lost it."

Quinn nodded as if she understood. "And you didn't really want to kill yourself did you? I mean...you left the door open, right?"

"Yeah." I lied. "I just...I don't know Quinn. I was hysterical. I'm sorry."

"I'm just so glad you're ok!" She jumped up and hugged me tightly, which surprised me and I hugged her back awkwardly.

"Thanks for finding me and going to Mr. J."

"You're welcome!" She squealed and then sat down on the chair beside my bed again. "So you and Mr. J...you're together now?"

"Yeah." I smiled. "We are."

"And how's that going to work?"

"Quinn..."

"What?" She asked offended. "It's just a question."

"It will work." I said clearly. "And I'm happy, can we just leave it at that?"

She sighed dramatically. "Yeah, ok."

"What's with you?" I asked, sitting up in bed. "The night we went out you were upset. Because of a guy."

She sighed once more, although not that dramatically, but more seriously now.

"It's stupid. I...I met someone online and he seemed great and we met up and...well he was really weird." Her eyes grew wide and she wore a look I knew all too well. It was fear.

"Why?"

"I don't know." She shifted in her seat. "There was something about him...he reminded me of you, actually, you have similar eyes, but the way he talked and...I don't know Harleen. I can't explain it. It's just every time he said something I just..." She shivered. "He was really sexual, but not flirting more like...creepy. It was just weird and I needed to go out. That's all."

"I'm sorry. You should have told me."

Quinn nodded. "I know. I'm sorry. I'm just...I'm really hung up on Dr. Turner. I know he's married..." She blushed. "But I just have such a huge crush on him. It's ridiculous!" She buried her head in her hands and I wondered if I should tell her the truth, but then she said: "He's gone now anyway. It doesn't matter."

"Where is he? Have they already released him?"

She shook her head sadly. "His wife took him home and wants to take care of him there. He hasn't woken up yet." I could see how hard she was struggling to keep her tears at bay. "Who would do something so horrible? Who would hurt him like that?"

I avoided her eyes by leaning back against my pillows and closing my eyes. "I don't know."

"You're tired." She said in an apologetic tone. "I should probably go."

"No." I said and opened my eyes again. "Stay. I don't feel like being alone right now."

Quinn giggled in a high tone. "You miss him, don't you?"

"Yeah." I blushed deeply, feeling more like a 13 year old girl than I ever had.

"Harleen?" She asked me in a sudden serious tone.

"Yeah?"

"Will you promise...next time you're in such a bad place...can you promise that you'll call me before hurting yourself?"

It had taken me this long to see how much of a good friend Quinn was for me. Yes she was loud and annoying at times and she asked too many questions, but she truly was my friend. Even though I hadn't wanted her to be she had become my best friend.

"I promise Quinn."

"Thanks."

The door opened then and a different nurse than before came inside to take away the tray of food I had shared with Quinn.

"I'm glad you're feeling better Dr. Quinzel." The pretty brunette smiled. "I was really worried when I heard that you were here."

"Thanks." I blushed because honestly I had no idea who this woman was. I was such a cliché doctor, but my days were so hectic, the nurses tended to all look the same to me.

"Did you like your dinner?" She leaned forward and I was suddenly hit with a horribly familiar smell of vanilla perfume. I took a deep shuddering breath and tried my best to focus. It was her. She had been there when I'd been attacked – she was one of them! Mr. J had left me here to look for the police officer thinking I was going to be safe, but I wasn't!

"Harleen?" Quinn's bubbly voice brought me back to reality. She and the nurse were looking at me, both had smiles on their face. But I saw the coldness in the nurses eyes. She knew that I knew.

"Yeah. Sorry." I smiled sweetly. "Dinner was excellent. Thanks so much..." I squinted my eyes. "Sorry I'm drawing a blank."

"That's alright." She also smiled sweetly. "I'm Jessica."

"Thanks for dinner, Jessica."

"That's quite alright, Dr. Qunizel. I'm on night-shift today, so if you need anything just call me."

"Thanks!"

I was going to die. I was literally and actually going to die. We'd spent ages making out but we hadn't exchanged phone numbers! How was I supposed to reach Mr. J? I couldn't do this by myself! I'd have to fake a panic attack and tell them I needed to see my therapist right away...honestly I was close to a panic attack anyway.

"Harleen? Are you ok?"

Quinn! I still had Quinn!

"What are you doing?" She snapped in a panicked tone as I ripped out my IV and stood up on shaking knees.

"You have to drive me to the Joker – now."

"What?" Quinn came towards me and held onto my arms trying to calm me down. "Harleen, what's going on?"

"I didn't try to kill myself!" I burst into tears. "I was attacked by a group of women and that nurse is one of them! Please, you have to get me out of here!"

My news made her astonished enough to let go of me. "You didn't try to kill yourself?"

"No. They made it look like it though, please Quinn! We have to go!"

"Ok!" My panic was contagious and had gotten to her as well. "We'll go. Let's just grab your stuff an-"

"There's no time! We need to go now!" I bent down to put on my shoes and was hit with a sudden wave of dizziness and fell forward onto the floor.

"Harleen!" Quinn was at my side in seconds and helped me up. "Don't rush ok? If you pass out, I can't get you out of here!"

"Yeah." I sighed. "No rush."

She tied my shoes for me and helped me stand up, then we slowly began walking outside. There were a few nurses walking around, but Quinn was still wearing her white gown. No one would question us.

"I parked in the garage." She muttered beside me. "We'll be there in about five minutes."

Those five minutes were the longest of my life. I felt like I was going to pass out any minute from sheer exhaustion and expected nurse Jessica to show up behind me any second ready to just finish me off once and for all.

When it happened, it happened very quickly. There were no last words exchanged between us, as a loud gun shot echoed through the garage.

3rd. Person POV

Yvette Carrow had stopped screaming a long time ago and Johnny knew his boss had succeeded in his plan.

"Johnny!" Sure enough the green-haired man came towards him, closely followed by the broken woman. "Officer Carrow has agreed to work for me! Isn't that great?"

"Fantastic, boss." After all these years he still wasn't entirely sure what happened down in that cellar. He never left any marks when he tortured his victims. At least none that were easily visible.

"Now, Yvette and I are going back to the hospital. Turns out two of those cunts work there, so we're going to go and check on Harley and make sure she's ok. And officer Carrow has also agreed to be Harley's personal bodyguard!" With the deadliest smile he owned the Joker turned to the redhead. It was the smile that still scared Johnny even after all this time he'd spent with his boss. "And Yvette knows that if one hair is out of place on Harley's head then her little niece is going to pay for it. Catherine's five and wants to be a police officer when she grows up, just like her aunt, isn't that sweet?"

"Just darlin', boss."

"Well let's just hope she does a better job than this poor excuse here." Mr. J said coldly nodding at the corrupt police woman. "How's poor Harold doing?" He asked now.

"He hasn't woken up yet." Johnny answered looking at the women. She was pale and had obviously been crying. She knew there was no way out, that she belonged to the Joker now. "There might be brain damage."

At the news of her husbands condition she paled even more and the Joker smiled relaxed and cheerfully said: "Well lucky for you my girlfriend is a trauma-surgeon." He began to laugh his slow maniacal laugh: "Ha ha ha haaaa my girlfriend! Isn't that crazy?!"

Johnny cracked a smile. Yvette looked like she had just wet her pants.

"Come on, Officer Carrow, you have a job to do!"

YES! Finally some action! :D What do you guys think? :)