Thank you to those who decided to check out this fanfiction. This is probably the longest chapter I have ever written, so I hope you enjoy it. Shoutout to Voidless Prince for your positive feedback.
After a 15 minute flight, The Hot Rodders arrived at Fortuna. On a normal day, the planet would be a sight to see. Lots of beautiful green grass, ginormous sakura trees, and pristine crystal clear rivers. It was no wonder that Fortuna was a popular tourist destination for many Lylatians. However, on this particular occasion, the green grass was ablaze and an army of robot soldiers were attacking the natives. "It's game time! Let's kick some robo-ass!" exclaimed Falco as he got out of his Arwing. The rest of the Hot Rodder's exclaimed "Yeah!". They ran towards the battlefield, each equipped with a Hyperion™ Machine Gun.
As Falco got closer to the robots, he started to notice that they look extraordinarily familiar. The reason why didn't dawn on him until he got right up close to one. "How the hell did they create a whole army of robotic clones of Fox McCloud?!" Falco thought angrily to himself while smashing the robots to bits using his majestic wingman powers.
There were so many robot clones of Fox, the Hot Rodders turned taking them out into a game. Each one was worth a point. Whoever won got to pick dinner that night, so they all tried hard to win. After about 2 hours, all of the robots were destroyed, restoring peace to Fortuna. Falco ended up winning with his majestic wingman powers. Since the job was done, The Hot Rodders left the planet.
Right after leaving the planet, The Hot Rodders encountered Pigma Dengar of Star Wolf. "FALCO! You're going to pay for what you did to Wolf!" he screamed over the radio. Then, Pigma shot a steady stream of bullets at Falco. Falco barrel rolled his way through the ocean of bullets coming at him and nearly crashed into a meteor. Falco narrowly dodged the meteor while Pigma crashed into it; however, Pigma's ship seemed completely unharmed. "Haha! You thought a silly little meteor was enough to stop me? I learned from Wolf's mistakes and got some diamond armor for my ship. Can you believe it only cost me 50000 credits! That's more than you make in a year, birdbrain!" stated Pigma. This enraged Falco more than he already was. Falco quickly turned on his Arwing's rapid fire and sent a steady stream of bullets at the unbreakable diamond spacecraft in front of him. Pigma barrel rolled out of the way, but about 5 of the bullets hit his window, causing it to fall out. Pigma started to spin out of control until he landed on another meteor. "You haven't heard the end of this, Falco!" he yelled in defeat. "That's what you get for calling me birdbrain, you greedy pig!" responded Falco.
7 minutes later, The Hot Rodders arrived on Corneria. They stopped by General Pepper's office to collect their reward and turn in Pigma. "Good work, Hot Rodders. Not only did you save Fortuna from what could've been a disaster, you also captured Pigma, the second most wanted criminal in all of the Lylat System. As a reward, take these 3000 credits and an Olive Garden gift card." stated General Pepper.
After leaving General Pepper's office, Falco asked "Anyone want to go to Olive Garden?" The rest of the Hot Rodders responded "Sure".
The Hot Rodders arrived at Olive Garden in 30 seconds, thanks to their spacecraft. Then, they went inside the Olive Garden, where a jolly canine chef greeted them. "Welcome to Olive Garden. Please wait to be seated." he said to them. This led to Katt and Falco making out some more, disgusting the rest of the Hot Rodders.
Around 10 minutes later, a little canine came out of the kitchen. "Hello, y'all. My name is Katherine Poodlemeyer. I will be your waitress today, you beautiful majestic wingman. Follow me, please." They walked to a dimly lit corner of the restaurant, where there sat a single table. Once they were seated, Katherine gave everybody a menu. "I'll be right back." she said before running back to the kitchen.
"Has anyone noticed how weird this day has been?" Green Slayer asked. "Yes. It has been weird." replied Falco. "I agree. What was up with the Fox McCloud robots?" retorted Katt. "Yeah. Plus, General Pepper hasn't been able to contact Star Fox at all. Something bad could have happened to them." stated Falco. "I don't care what happens to Star Fox. It's none of my business what happens to those egotists. The only thing I care about right now is how much mushrooms this restaurant can stuff in their pasta." stated Collan Davenport. "You mean somebody actually likes mushrooms?" inquired Falco. "Of course. They are the most delicious thing in the universe! You have to be crazy not to realize it!" responded Collan. The rest of the Hot Rodders thought silently to themselves that Collan was crazy. "Did anybody else notice that the waitress called me 'Majestic Wingman'? The only person who ever called me that was my ex-girlfriend, Charlotte." stated Falco, who was having terrible flashbacks. "Yeah. That was weird. I think you're a majestic wingman, though." replied Katt. "Aww. You're too kind." replied Falco. Then, Katt and Falco started making out some more.
Just then, Katherine returned to take their orders, looking disgusted and angry after seeing Falco and Katt kissing. "What can I get for you today, my majestic wingman?" she asked. Falco, who was clearly surprised, answered "Who?". "I'll take the spaghetti with lots and lots and lots of mushrooms, please." said Collan. "I'd like DEATH PASTA, please." said Tokoyami. "I'd like some spaghetti with the maximum amount of tomato sauce." said Green Slayer. "I'd like the Chicken Alfredo, please." said Katt. "I'll have what she's having, please." said Falco. "Okay. Will y'all have anything to drink?" Katherine asked them. Everyone answered Dr. Pepper. "Okay. I'll be right back with those drinks. While you wait, get fat off these breadsticks because we always take forever to cook things." said Katherine before going back to the kitchen.
"Did you hear that? She called me 'Majestic Wingman' again! Something fishy's going on here, and I don't mean the Shrimpy Mac and Cheese." stated Falco. "You're right, Falco. However, it's none of my business if this establishment is up to something. The only thing I care about right now is these breadsticks." said Collan.
Just then, Katherine came back with their drinks. "Here's everybody's drinks." she said. "Thank you, ma'am." said Collan. Everyone took a sip. Then, everyone but Falco passed out. "SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE!" screamed Falco. "I'm afraid that won't be necessary." said Katherine. Then, she ripped off her skin to reveal the true person within. Falco was staring into the eyes of his ex-girlfriend, Charlotte, who lived on 22 Acacia Avenue. "MARRY ME, MAJESTIC WINGMAN!" screamed Charlotte. "NEVER!" screamed Falco. "THEN YOU WILL DIE ALONG WITH YOUR INSIGNIFICANT FRIENDS!" screamed Charlotte before transforming into a hollow. Fortunately, Falco brought his gun with him. Falco shot Charlotte in the face. She survived this. Then, the other customers went into a panic and ran for their lives. "YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE, YOU PATHETIC MORTALS!" Charlotte screamed. She grabbed Falco and started to flee. Just then, an orange-haired soul reaper bursted into the restaurant. "Die, hollow." said the orange-haired soul reaper before slicing Charlotte's head off. "You're safe now, sir." he said before leaving the restaurant. Then, Falco called an ambulance to cure his friends (and girlfriend) from certain doom.
5 minutes later, the paramedics arrived. After checking them out, the paramedic said "They have been hit with a simple but powerful poison. The antidote is quite simple: Pasta. Fortunately, you are in Olive Garden." Then, the paramedic fed the unconscious team some pasta. They immediately were revived. "What the hell just happened?" said Katt after regaining consciousness. Then, Falco explained everything you just read to his team. "Wow. That sounds like a crazy plotline in a book or something." responded Tokoyami. "I'm never eating here again." said Collan. Then, they left the restaurant and returned to base.
Immediately when they returned home, they all went straight to bed because they all felt extremely tired after recovering from poison. "Goodnight, Majestic Wingman." said Katt in a romantic manner. "Same to you, Katt." responded Falco.
At 5:30 am, the Hot Rodders were woken up by a blaring alarm. "What the hell is going on?" yelled Collan. He got out of bed to check the system's computer. There was an urgent message from General Pepper. "Hot Rodders. Do you copy?" he urgently asked. "Yes. What's up, General?" asked Collan. "Last night, Pigma broke out of prison. We didn't find out until just now, when we received reports of Star Wolf terrorizing the mining colonies over on MacBeth. We need you to fly on over and save the planet." answered General Pepper. "We accept." said Collan. "Hot Rodders! Move out!" Collan screamed at his team. They quickly got into their spacecraft and flew off to MacBeth to save the day once again.