Chapter 3 – The Werewolf Register

21st November 1978

It was a dull day, the iron sky filling the window as Remus opened the curtains that morning. He had been waiting for this day for months, ever since an owl had brought him a letter on stiff parchment with an official Ministry seal.

Dear Mr R. J. Lupin,

You are formally required to attend an appointment with the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures at 9 o'clock on 21st November. Following the completion of your studies at Hogwarts, you must now be registered as an adult lycanthrope in order for your condition to be properly monitored.

Please inform us if you are unable to attend this appointment, as a different date and time will need to be scheduled.

Yours sincerely,

Keith Llewellyn

Head of the Department for the Regulation
and Control of Magical Creatures

After getting dressed, he picked the letter up, not really reading the words. Every time he had looked at the letter – which he had done more often than was necessary – it felt like his stomach filled with lead, weighing him down. Now that he wasn't at school, being a werewolf seemed like more of a curse than ever. At Hogwarts, Madam Pomfrey always made him feel safe, and with the others to run around the Forbidden Forest with, it all seemed like a game – a secret they shared, like the Marauder's Map or James' invisibility cloak.

Now, though, it wasn't a fun kind of secret; there was nothing good to mask all the bad. Sirius had been with him every full moon, but although James and Peter tried, they were busy as often as not. And having to register with the Ministry made him feel like a criminal.

James had tried to make it seem less serious by comparing it to the animagus registry – not that any of them were on it – but Remus knew it wasn't the same. Animagi were kept track of for their own safety; werewolves were "monitored" because they were dangerous.

When Sirius woke up that morning, the other side of the bed was cold. Remus, he knew, hadn't slept well. He'd felt him tossing and turning beside him all night, and despite his best efforts, little that Sirius said had been able to help him feel better.

He dressed quickly, pulling on dark jeans and a shirt before heading to the kitchen. He found Remus sitting at their dining table, one hand clasped around a mug of tea that had already gone cold and the other tapping a paranoid rhythm against a piece of parchment – the letter from the Ministry.

Sirius approached him uncertainly, letting his hands rest on Remus' shoulders, and feeling the tension there.

"Hey," Remus said, tilting his head backwards to glance up at him.

"Morning," Sirius replied, leaning down to place a soft kiss on Remus' forehead. "Do you want more tea?"

"Sure," Remus replied, regarding his cold mug with a frown. "I must have forgotten about it."

"No problem," Sirius shrugged, taking the mug. He let the tap run until the kettle was filled nearly to the brim, then placed it on the hob, carelessly casting an incendio spell to light a fire under it. He sat down beside Remus as he waited for it to boil, trying to make the words sound much more relaxed than he felt when he asked, "how are you doing?"

"I'm fine," Remus said. Sirius gave him a knowing look and Remus sighed. "Alright, I'm not fine. But there's nothing I can do, so there's no point getting worked up about it."

"That doesn't mean you're not allowed to be upset," Sirius replied. "This whole thing" – he gestured to the letter – "is ridiculous. You shouldn't have to do this."

The kettle began to bubble, steam rising from it; Sirius poured two cups of tea and handed one to Remus. Sirius wanted to reach out to him, but based on his hunched shoulders and the way Remus' hands were curled tightly around his mug, he was too tense to want much physical contact.

"I've always known I'd have to do this. It was meant to be when I turned seventeen but Dumbledore convinced them I wasn't a threat" – he almost winced as he said the word – "while I was at Hogwarts."

"You're not a threat now, Remus," Sirius said gently. "You're not going to hurt anyone. We're always careful."

"Doesn't mean the Ministry trusts me." He took a sip of his tea. "I know it's only a meeting, just some papers to sign and things, but I just… I just wish they didn't treat us like this. It's not like anyone ever asked to be a werewolf. It's not our fault, but they act like we've done something wrong just because of who we are – what we are."

"Remus…" Sirius searched for the right words, but before he had the chance Remus stood up abruptly, finishing his tea in two swift gulps.

"We should go," he said, his voice harsh. "Wouldn't want to be late for my special day."

Sirius hadn't been to the ministry since he'd been dragged there with his father as a child. It looked much the same as he remembered – the huge atrium looming above him and Remus as they entered. After a disagreement with the witch at the reception desk over why Sirius was there at all, given the fact that Remus was the one with the appointment – he'd begrudgingly been given a visitor's badge – they spent a good twenty minutes trying to find an empty lift down to the fourth floor. Finally, he and Remus found themselves at the department for the Control and Regulation of Magical Creatures.

There were three signs along the main corridor, each stretching away to other parts of the ministry – one marked beings, another marked spirits and a final labelled beasts. Sirius felt a swell of anger rising in him as he and Remus turned to the corridor on the right – the one for magical beasts. There were many things Sirius could have said in that moment, none of them particularly pleasant about the Ministry. Instead though, he reached out for Remus' hand, and was relieved when Remus didn't pull away.

On the wall was a large portrait of Newt Scamander, a name Sirius couldn't place until he remembered he'd written one of their textbooks. Remus frowned at the moving image and said, "He created the werewolf register. It was just before I was… well, you know."

"I didn't know that," Sirius said, making a mental note to throw away 'Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them' when they got home.

"My dad knows him," Remus added. "Bit of a dick, actually."

They passed the offices of the Ghoul Task Force, and soon came to an area of open space; on one side was a door leading to the Werewolf Capture Unit – something that Sirius had never heard of before. He saw Remus' eyes scan the sign, before his gaze determined returned to the floor.

"Okay?" Sirius asked quietly, squeezing his hand as they finally arrived at the right department – the Werewolf Register.

Remus nodded jerkily, before taking a decisive step forward, letting go of Sirius' hand.

The double doors they entered through led to a surprisingly standard waiting area. It reminded Sirius of St Mungo's, with it bare walls and plastic chairs.

The only other person in the room was a wizard standing behind a single desk, who narrowed his eyes at them when they entered.

"Morning," Sirius said purposefully, to which the wizard only frowned at him coldly and said, "What name is it?"

"Remus Lupin," Remus said from beside him, and Sirius bit back the number of scathing remarks he felt inclined to throw at the receptionist.

"Take a seat," he informed them. "Someone will be with you shortly."

They sat in the seats nearest to the door, Remus returning to the repetitive tapping he'd been doing that morning.

Sirius wanted to say something to him – something that would make him feel better, but really, he didn't think there were words for that at all.

In a matter of only a few minutes, a stern looking witch with a clipboard came out of a small door on the opposite side of the room. She surveyed the pair of them over her glasses before looking down at her clipboard and saying "Lupin."

Remus stood up hesitantly, and Sirius found himself also getting to his feet, reluctant to leave Remus alone with these people.

"And who are you?" the witch asked when they were only a few feet away from her. "We don't allow any one but the werewolf into the register room."

"His name is Remus," Sirius snapped, as he saw Remus slink around the door, away from him and out of sight. "And I'm Sirius Black. Perhaps you've heard of my family?"

The witch looked momentarily concerned, but the look was quickly disguised with a thin, forced smile. "Wait here," she instructed him, and went into the room after Remus.

Sirius had been waiting for a quarter of an hour – though it seemed like much longer – when he was pulled out of his worries about Remus by a crying child.

He looked up to find a little girl whose hand was being held by a woman who was presumably her mother. The mother was talking hurriedly to the wizard behind the desk, while her daughter was pulling desperately on her mother's hand, trying to get away as tears streamed down her face.

"I don't want to!" she was saying, and when her mother finally bent down to pick her up, she collapsed against her almost immediately.

"It'll be okay baby," her mother cooed quietly, "it'll only take a couple of minutes and then we can go home, okay?"

They sat down opposite Sirius, the girl in her mother's lap, crying softly.

"Sorry about the noise," her mother apologised, smiling at Sirius sadly. "It's been hard to calm her down since -"

"Don't apologise," Sirius said at once. He looked again at the little girl, who had stopped crying at the sound of his voice, and was now regarding him with wide eyes.

"Are you a werewolf?" she asked boldly.

"Amanda," her mother said sharply, then to Sirius, "you don't have to answer that."

"It's no problem," Sirius said, waving her away. He bent down beside the little girl, who watched him curiously. "One of my best friends is a werewolf," he told her. "I'm waiting for him now."

"You're friends?" the girl asked. "Even though he's broken now?"

"Did someone tell you that?" Sirius asked, alarmed. "He's definitely not broken."

"That's what everyone says about me," the girl told him, "I heard the healers talking about it."

Sirius glanced up to see that the girl's mother was struggling not to cry, and felt the anger that had been gnawing at him since entering the Ministry abate into a quiet sadness that made his chest ache.

"Don't listen to what other people say," Sirius told her, "they don't know what they're talking about."

"So I can still have friends?"

"The very best," Sirius said firmly. "Remus is special, because he's a good person, not because he's a werewolf, just like you're special too, okay?"

"Okay," she said, smiling at him faintly.

"Good," Sirius replied.

Remus had sat through question after question about how and when he'd been bitten, the precautions he was taking and the people he'd told about his condition. He was becoming more than a little impatient.

"Are you currently employed?" the woman asked. She was looking down at the papers on her desk, making notes and ticking boxes. She had barely even looked at Remus since he came in.

"No."

"Why not?"

Remus didn't answer for so long that the woman finally looked up to see the exasperated expression on his face.

"Isn't that obvious?" Remus said. "It's because of the laws made in this department that I have to disclose my lycanthropy every time I apply for a job. Shockingly, no one wants to hire a werewolf."

The woman's eyes narrowed, but then she returned her attention to her papers.

"'Unemployed for personal reasons', then," she said, ticking a box. Remus felt anger bubbling inside him, but he held it in. "Are you sexually active?"

"I – what?" Remus asked, taken off guard.

"It's not entirely clear whether some traits of lycanthropy can be passed on. We just want to make sure you're… being careful."

"So that I don't create another monster, you mean?" Remus snapped. "Yeah, as a matter of fact, I am sexually active, but you don't need to worry about that. There's no risk of my boyfriend getting pregnant."

The woman opened her mouth, closed it again, and then said tersely, "That's the end of the questions. I just need you to sign at the bottom."

She handed Remus a pen and turned the form around to face him.

I, Remus John Lupin, confirm that the above information is correct, and that I will notify the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures of any changes. I declare I will take the utmost precaution in assuring that I do not cause harm to others during nights of the full moon and that I do not pass on my condition. I take full responsibility for the results of my actions whilst in my wolf form.

Remus gritted his teeth and scribbled his signature, pushing the form away from him when he was done. He didn't even want to look at it.

"That's everything, then," the woman said. "You're free to go."

The comment made Remus feel like a criminal more than ever.

"Thanks," he said flatly as he turned to leave.

There were a few more people in the waiting room than when he'd arrived. Sirius was talking to a little girl and her mother, and Remus could tell from the scars on the girl's hands that she was just like him. He pulled down his own sleeves self-consciously.

"All done?" Sirius asked.

"Yeah."

The little girl squirmed in her mother's arms. "Is it me next?" she said, her voice rising with fear.

"I think so, darling," the mother replied. She shot a cautious smile at Remus and, on a whim, he crouched down in front of them.

"It's not so bad," he said gently. "Just a few questions to answer."

"I don't like them," the girl said, her head turning towards the receptionist. "They all look at me funny."

"I know," Remus said. "They look at me like that, too."

"Were you scared?" she asked. Remus wasn't sure if she was asking about his appointment or about something else.

"Yeah, I was," he said honestly. "But it's okay to be scared. That just means you're all the more brave for facing your fears."

The girl smiled at him, and then her name was called by the stern-looking witch. She waved goodbye to Remus and Sirius as she and her mother went through the door.

"Ready to go?" Sirius asked.

"Yeah," Remus held out his hand and Sirius took it.